by Kate Speck
Darcy sat for a moment and as understanding dawned, his mouth gaped opened.
“What does that mean? Who is Caliban?” Bingley asked. “I have not read it. You both may read quite a bit but I skipped this one. Who is Caliban?”
Darcy slowly nodded. “Yes, Caliban. He is an ugly creature, son of a witch, who is described to be freckled and hideous. He is written to be grotesque in appearance and it must be what my mind had formed after my accident. How is it possible for me to imagine such a thing?” Darcy sat in deep thought. Perhaps my Lizzy is not so heinous after all. Perhaps I imagined everything after I hit my head. He fingered the handkerchief in his waistcoat pocket. She was real. I did not imagine her, she is real.
“So your monster wif… rescuer was imaged after Caliban and might not be a beastly creature. What did you begin to read after?” Richard inquired.
“I began to read Beauty and the Beast. I had finished it in English and wished to start it in French, in its original version.” Darcy answered.
Richard laughed. “Too many monsters and beasts! Perhaps you should read more poetry, Darcy. No wonder your nightmares are filled with such frightful scenes.”
Darcy smiled. “Yes, Richard. Perhaps more poetry for me. Maybe love poems.”
Bingley laughed, returning to more of his jovial self. “Or you can be like me and not read at all. My dreams are filled with lovely ladies and dancing.” He sobered quickly, thinking of entertaining, “What am I to do with Caroline? What can I do without a hostess?”
Richard laughed loudly. “Well, the role of a hostess is to be female and order the servants about; that is what your sister does, does she not?” The other two men chuckled as well. “You have forgotten that you have the current Mistress of Pemberley residing under your roof. Georgiana may not be out yet but she is more than capable of inviting a few ladies over and handling dinner menus. She has learned much from my mother, the Countess of Matlock, and is fully capable of being your hostess for the remainder of our stay. Perhaps if you tell Miss Bingley how insignificant her threats are, she will cease to be such a pain in your ass! Make her plan a Ball. Make her miserable and invite a hundred of your neighbors here!”
Darcy grumbled, “But I would rather she be gone. What do I do about her threat to me, Richard? She said she would ruin my reputation if I do not marry her. She is insistent that I have taken her virtue and that my mother’s ring is proof of our betrothal. I cannot recall, and Wilkins does not know either, how in the world that ring ended up on her finger. Unless she has had it faked somewhere, it is my mother’s ring and I cannot comprehend it.”
“Why not ask Georgie? Perhaps she showed it to Miss Bingley and it was replicated somehow, or… I hate to say it, Bingley… but it might have been stolen from Pemberley.” Richard commented.
Bingley groaned, “Aargh… if that she has stolen it from you, Darcy, she could be hanged. She would bring shame to my family and I would kill her myself.”
“My mother’s ring, if it is indeed authentic, is priceless, as it is believed to have been once owned by Queen Elizabeth herself. I do not understand how it could have ended up with Miss Bingley when it was last in Pemberley’s safe.” Darcy stated. “I do not wish to have Georgie involved yet. She is so happy here. I have not seen her so delighted to make new acquaintances and I do not wish to disrupt her peace yet. I know she will feel guilty if Miss Bingley had stolen it from Pemberley or if I ask her to leave Netherfield because of a pending scandal. I wish to keep my baby sister protected a little while longer.” He sighed.
Richard tapped his shoulder. “I understand, Darcy. Although I think you should tell Georgiana everything, I know you wish to keep her untarnished from the evils of the world for as long as possible. She is growing up to be a fine lady, Darcy. I know she could handle it but I sympathize with you as well.” He smiled. “It is dinnertime. Perhaps we can make Miss Bingley as uncomfortable as much as possible and she will retire to her rooms for the next,” he pulled out his pocket watch, “fortnight?”
They laughed and with a lighter heart, joined the others for dinner.
Chapter 7
“Madam,” he bowed, “Madam,” he bowed again, he bowed three more times, as the ladies were introduced, barely looking at their skirts and avoiding eye contact. Darcy rolled his eyes behind Bingley’s back as his friend was gushing at the fair-haired lady who spoke quietly. She was as beautiful as Bingley had described, tall and willowy in frame, who appeared as serene as one could be. His friend had a particular preference and it was always the same. Same height, same figure, same hair, same dullness. Darcy could not understand why Bingley would be so interested in someone who looked so much like every lady before, even if this Miss Bennet was a little prettier in the face than the other dozen women Bingley had fancied.
He looked around and saw Georgiana already in rapid conversation with a dark-haired woman. The second daughter, I think. Darcy thought. He could not see her face, as that lady was facing away from him, with two other younger girls sitting and observing Georgiana carefully. The fourth and fifth daughters.
Darcy saw the third Miss Bennet sitting next to Miss Jane Bennet. Mary Bennet. He attempted to remember all of their names. He had never paid attention to single ladies if he could help it, and having five intrude all at the same time was overwhelming. Elizabeth is the one that Georgiana favors. He remembered. The other two, Cathy? Libby?
He chuckled softly as he watched Richard practically drooling over Miss Elizabeth. Darcy had taken his place nearer to Bingley and still could not get a good look at Miss Elizabeth. I thought Richard had already given up on Miss Elizabeth. His future wife, how laughable. These ladies, if I can judge by their dresses, are not well off at all. Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst’s dresses are horrid but their materials are by far more expensive. This Miss Elizabeth would be a terrible wife to Richard and she would never qualify as Mrs. Darcy with her relatives in trade and no dowry.
Darcy was in deep thought. He looked over at Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst, who were exchanging pleasantries with Miss Bennet. Darcy knew that Bingley had threatened his sisters with what they feared most: Financial penalty.
Bingley had told Caroline that if she stepped one toe out of line, if she decided to leave Netherfield, or to cause Darcy any more trouble, he would require her to pay him back for all of the years of overspending and would be banned from his homes, here in Hertfordshire as well as the London townhouse.
The Hursts, who did not have a home in London, would also be evicted, and for the first time in their four-year marriage, Mr. Hurst put his foot down and commanded his wife to obey his brother’s wishes. Mr. Hurst’s family home was located in a desolate town, ten miles north of Liverpool, and he had hated being there with nothing to do and a serious lack of good wine.
Miss Bingley had apologized Darcy and promised that she would not spread any word of their engagement. She refused to return the ring, though, still holding firm that once his memories returned, they would be married and she would hold on to the proof of their betrothal.
Darcy still did not have any proof of the theft or deception so he had let it go for now. Suddenly, his hearing snapped to attention when he heard his sister utter the next words.
“Lizzy! You must come and visit me at Pemberley! You must promise me, Lizzy!” Georgiana cried.
Lizzy! Miss Elizabeth is Lizzy? Darcy’s eyes opened wide. He stood immediately and without another thought, he walked over to where Miss Elizabeth was sitting. He stood behind her, half hoping she was his Lizzy, half wishing she was not, unsure of what to say or what to expect. I just need to see her eyes. I need to see if she is the one I have been dreaming of.
“Brother! Please say yes! I have been telling Lizzy about Pemberley and she had always wished to visit Lambton. Lizzy usually goes to London after Christmas but perhaps she can come visit me if her father agrees. Please say yes.” Georgiana begged, seeing Darcy stand behind Miss Elizabeth.
Darcy smiled softly at his sister�
��s excitement. “Of course, Georgiana. As you wish.” His heart thumped louder as Miss Elizabeth began to turn to face him. “Miss Elizabeth, it would be an honor to host…” He met her eyes and froze. It was the same pair of sparkling eyes that had invaded his thoughts day and night.
Elizabeth smiled slightly, seeing the handsome gentleman finally look at her. She had avoided facing him fully in fear that he might continue to find her horrendous and she flushed now, realizing that he was still shocked to see her as an awful monster.
“Oh, Georgiana, I am afraid I offend your brother with my appearance. We will talk of my trip later. Will you show me a dressing room? I would like to refresh myself.” Elizabeth quickly asked.
Georgiana was quite confused but stood and walked her dear friend for privacy, who insisted she did not require assistance, and returned to continue her conversation with Kitty and Lydia, who were asking several questions demurely today, and she had begun to enjoy their company more. She glanced at her brother whose face was stern, as she had often seen when his headaches had pained him.
Richard, who had been speaking with the two younger ladies, finding them more pleasant without the crass flirtations, saw Darcy still standing still behind the couch and became concerned. He seemed perfectly fine until he interrupted Georgiana’s conversation with Miss Elizabeth and while Miss Elizabeth paled and left for the dressing room, Darcy had remained in the same place without moving. He winked at Georgiana to communicate with her silently and stood. He approached Darcy, discreetly pulling him to a corner to look out the window. “Are you well, Darcy? Is it your head?”
Darcy startled, “Yes. Yes, it is my head. I need to rest. Make some excuse for me. I must go.” And without acknowledging anyone in the room, he quickly rushed out of the room.
Richard put on a false smile, “Darcy needs to see to something in his rooms. He will return as soon as he can.” He returned to the ladies and continued to converse, and although concerned for his cousin, he knew Darcy required privacy to rest.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Elizabeth looked at herself in the mirror. She saw nothing out of order, she thought she looked quite well today. She wiped away the tears that had fallen and pinched her cheeks to give it some color.
After befriending Georgiana Darcy and realizing that the Mr. Darcy who had suffered the fall from his horse was actually Miss Darcy’s brother, she had been nervous and eager to see the handsome gentleman again. She had been quite insulted that he thought her so hideous, but as he had been seeing monsters, she had hoped that he had found her at least tolerable now. When she finally met his eyes and his face turned into a fierce look, as if he still found her loathsome and hateful, her vanity had been crushed and she could not remain composed in the same room.
Well, fine! If he hates my appearance that much, I will never see him again. As long as Jane is happy with Mr. Bingley and he does not disrupt their peace, I will only befriend Georgiana and be out of his sight as much as possible. I will not let him affect me so! She determined.
Straightening her posture and ready to face the world again, she stepped out of the small room to return to the party.
“Lizzy! It is you!” Darcy walked briskly towards her as soon as she exited, and he grabbed her by her upper arm to practically drag her into the library.
Darcy quickly closed the door and held her face with both hands, cradling both of her cheeks and looking into her eyes as if inspecting a horse for sale.
“What are you doing? Mr. Darcy, release me immediately!” Elizabeth scowled.
Darcy ignored her pleas. He drew closer to her, his chest almost touching hers. “It is you, Lizzy? My monster? My loathsome creature with the beautiful eyes? My Lizzy?” He continued to ask. “Did you or did you not help me after I fell from my horse?”
Elizabeth could only nod once and his lips were on hers as soon as she confirmed his answer.
Darcy kissed her lips roughly and pressed his body against hers. He needed to connect with her; he wanted to touch her and make sure she was real. He had dreamt of her for over a fortnight and could not believe that he was holding her in his arms again. His need to taste her grew and he delved his tongue in her mouth to reach her deeper; to attach himself to her somehow, to join with her, wishing to make her his own.
Elizabeth was completely bewildered. This man had yelled at her, insulted her several times, held her in his arms, showed his disgust in company, and now was ardently kissing her. She thought of slapping him but as his passion grew, she succumbed to his fervor and returned his kisses.
But when his hand traveled down and he pressed his hand onto her buttocks to press against his body, she felt a protrusion against her stomach and jumped, realizing that she was being compromised.
She pushed him away from her as far as possible and slapped him across the cheek.
In shock, Darcy yelled out, “Why did you do that for?”
Elizabeth fumed. “First you yell and insult me, now you force your kiss onto me like a rake, and you ask me why I slapped you? I know you still think me a loathsome creature. Why did you kiss me? Am I some game to you? Now that you know I am not a servant, am I no longer safe from you?” She scoffed. “I saw the look in your eyes. You still find me horrid and yet I attract you enough for you to use me for your pleasures?”
Darcy realized his mistake once again. He had never acted so irrationally before but finally meeting her and seeing that she was not just an apparition had been a shock. She was beautiful. His Lizzy was absolutely stunning in her face, in her figure, especially her eyes.
“I am sorry, Lizzy. I have never behaved so impulsively before, but I was stunned to see you. I have had a memory loss and I do not recall what happened to cause my accident but I remembered you. I remembered bits of you but mostly your eyes and your kindness.” He drew close to her very slowly so that he did not frighten her or get another slap in the face. “You are so beautiful, Lizzy. More beautiful than I ever imagined. Even when I visualized you to be a loathsome monster, I loved you. I fell in love with your kind heart and I could not stop thinking of you.” He cradled her cheek like he had done the first time he met her. “You have a beautiful soul and you have captured my heart.” He leaned closer and gently kissed her lips again.
Elizabeth closed her eyes and reveled in his declaration but was alerted to reality when she heard Georgiana’s voice in the hallway, calling out her name.
She jumped back a step and looked at the gentleman. “You cannot love me; you do not know me. You know nothing about me and I do not know anything about you. For you to declare your love is ridiculous and you are a rake for all I know. Please, do not do this again.”
Elizabeth quickly turned and opened the door, closing it behind her to keep him inside the library.
“Dear Georgiana, I took a wrong turn. Thank you for coming to my rescue. Let us return to the others.” She quickly grabbed her friend’s arm and led her back to the sitting room.
Darcy stood against the door with his forehead resting on it. What have I done? I have never kissed a woman like that before. I know it is astonishing but I love her. I love Elizabeth Bennet and she thinks me a rake because I behaved like a rake. I assaulted her and considered taking her virtue right here, right now. My God, Richard was right. I need to make Elizabeth Bennet my wife. But how?
His head was indeed throbbing now. He quietly opened the door to see no one about and sprinted to his rooms.
He lay on his bed and pulled out the bloodstained handkerchief that he had always carried. Elizabeth Bennet is my Lizzy! My beastly creature; no, my beautiful Lizzy, my pretty, witty, gorgeous, sensual Lizzy. I must have her know me better and make her mine. I have thought of no one, nothing else since meeting her and this was when I thought her a deformed monster. I need her. How do I make her love me?
His head pierced and he closed his eyes. He placed her handkerchief over his eyes and remembered her face. Her eyes were always clear but now, he could see the rest of her face with a hands
ome nose and soft pink lips. He could taste her again in his mind and his desires grew once more. I must make her my wife. No one else will do. I know so much more about her than she believes. She just needs to know me. Before he could think further, he fell asleep and dreamt of his wife and future children, and he slept more peacefully than he had in months.
Chapter 8
“Miss Elizabeth Bennet.” Darcy stated.
“Miss Elizabeth Bennet!” repeated Miss Bingley. "I am all astonishment. How long has she been such a favorite? And pray, when am I to wish you joy? Did you not meet her and her ‘fine eyes’ only yesterday?”
“It is none of your business, Miss Bingley. I refuse to discuss any more of my personal thoughts with you. Why are you here? You should not be wearing that in public.” Darcy seethed, seeing his mother’s ring on her hand.
“Well, Charles is forcing me to acquaint myself with these… commoners here and demanded that I present myself to my best advantage. Do you not agree that my dress outshines every single one of these drab ladies here? It is so obvious that they are so below us. I do not understand why my brother feels the need to be so accommodating.” She huffed. “And of course this is the best jewelry that has been gifted to me, so I proudly wear it. Oh, if only you would remember so I can tell the whole world that I will be Mrs. Darcy.”
“Never, madam. Over my dead body.” Darcy quietly whispered. He quickly walked away from the vulgar woman and looked out the window.
He had been frustrated that Miss Elizabeth had been avoiding him all night. Whenever he drew near her, she would depart for another part of the room, and if she was stationary and in conversation, she did not speak to him and found an excuse to leave.
“Mr. Darcy,” his reverie was interrupted when Mr. Bennet approached him.
“Mr. Bennet.” Darcy acknowledged.
Mr. Bennet kindly smiled at the young man, noticing that he seemed to be chasing his daughter and that same daughter was avidly avoiding him. “I understand you have been recovering from a horse fall. All is well now?”
