by Tamara Gill
“You daft, difficult, infuriating man.” Sarah tugged him around to face her once more. “Our differences will ensure relations between us will never be dull. Don’t you see?” She held his face between her hands. “I can no more leave you than I could amputate my own arm. Trust me, cutting off limbs isn’t my specialty.” When her attempt at jest failed, she sighed. “If you refuse to accept what I’m offering, if you cannot lower yourself to accept me for the woman I am…”
Her statement fell far short of the declaration he wanted from her, the words he’d waited his whole existence to hear. How he loved it when his obstinate attitude invoked her wrath, for only then did she reveal her innermost feelings. Perhaps she and he weren’t that different after all.
“Damn it, woman, enough.” He embraced her. He stopped her diatribe with a kiss, one that demanded she stand and fight or give quarter. Bending her over his arm, he plundered her mouth as if his whole existence came down to that one kiss. When he set her upright, she was as winded as he. He ran the tip of his tongue along his bottom lip, tasting salt spray, smoke and her sweetness. “You disregard my orders. You refuse to let me lend my protection. You’ve tried to kill me,” he lowered his voice for her ears alone, “and in spite of this, my estimation of you grows with each passing moment.”
She arched an eyebrow. “What exactly are you trying to say, Captain Westerbrooke?”
Of course he’d known she wouldn’t be content with that. “Just this. I want you.” His cock pressed painfully against his breeches.
“That much is obvious and nothing I haven’t seen before.” Her gaze flicked to the front of his trousers where his arousal grew. “Try again.”
Adrian waited in agony. His family had never been demonstrative and most definitely had never exchanged affectionate words. In all the years before he’d become a pirate, he hadn’t found a woman he interacted with well enough to say endearments to. After he’d won his ship, the women had filled a physical void; he never loved any of them. Most of the time, he didn’t wish to see them after he’d spent his sexual angst. Sarah was different beyond anyone he’d known. Now, with his heart in turmoil and the one female he wished to be by his side standing before him, the words refused to come. He’d never encountered this sort of overwhelming terror before.
What if she rejected him out of hand after he laid bare his soul? What if their views on piracy never factored into her goodwill? What if she had a completely different goal for her life?
“Adrian?” Confusion wavered in her voice. “After everything we have been through together, you still remain silent?” Her throat worked with the force of her swallow. “Do I not mean something to you?”
He might have let the opportunity slip by, his life might have remained cold, lonely and the same, had it not been for her trembling bottom lip and quivering chin. Those tiny tells of vulnerability broke through his reserve and reduced his resistance to the strength of pudding. “Damn it, Sarah, in my cabin.” When he strode ahead and he didn’t hear her footsteps behind him, he paused and turned. She stood motionless, shock and anger vying for domination in her expression.
My stubborn hellcat. May she always keep that fierce independence.
“Do not test the remainder of my patience, Miss Covington.” He enjoyed keeping her off balance. Giving Sarah the upper hand meant he’d lose all control and respect—from her and his crew, especially if any of the men lurked down below and waited for the outcome of this conversation. In the privacy of his cabin, what he intended instead would satisfy both her and him. Perhaps with his actions, he wouldn’t need to speak aloud the words to explain how he felt.
“Ah, and once again I should follow merely because it’s your will I do so?” Both of her hands now had settled on her hips.
Stuff and bother, why the hell can’t she just do what I ask without arguing? He rubbed a hand along his jaw. His shoulders drooped a fraction. “Sarah, please. I’d like a private word, and I…” He held her gaze, willing that she’d understand. “I don’t wish to convey my feelings when we might be overheard.”
For long, agonizing seconds, she stared at him. Finally, she nodded. “Very well. For this concession, I hope your side of the quarrel will be good.”
He didn’t speak until they’d both stepped inside his cabin and he’d slammed the door behind them. Then he pressed her against the portal and pinned her with his body. Adrian bit back a moan. He’d never become accustomed to how wonderful her soft curves felt. “Do you want the truth?”
Her eyes had darkened to near black pools. “Yes.” The word was a breathless affair.
“You make me mad with annoyance. I’m almost insane with the attempt to keep you safe while under my care in the midst of these men who wish you belonged to them. I wonder if you will leave on principle and then alternately think I can never be good enough to exist in the same realm you do.” He paused for breath and buried his fingers into her hair all the while sinking deeper into her smoldering eyes. “I’m a simple man. I have simple goals—steal cargo, sell it to the highest bidder and stay one step ahead of the men who chase me.”
“Adrian, please.” She attempted to move, but he held her steady with his fingers fanning over her skull. “No more pretty words or excuses. Tell me what is on your mind and in your heart.”
No one but his Sarah could put the issue so succinctly and prompt him to greater things at the same time. “I choose to live on this ship and shun every comfort I’ve been accustomed to because I like the challenge this life presents, even more now that you’ve come along.” His heartbeat thumped so loud he was sure she must hear. Why were the words hard to say? There was much more than the victory of battle on the line.
“And?” One of her eyebrows rose. Her bottom lip still trembled.
He couldn’t resist her, couldn’t hold back the tide of emotion that had been building since that seemingly long ago waltz in her cabin. “Sarah, when I’m in your presence, you make me feel welcome, wanted and redeemed, as if I’ve finally come home to the place I’ve been attempting to find all these years.”
Chapter Eleven
Sarah sagged into him. Relief and overwhelming need surged through her body. The words he’d spoken, coming from his pirate persona, were the sweetest benediction she could ever hope to hear. What had it cost him to make the admission? The dear price made it all the more valuable. It was a treasure she’d value always. “When that man took Tommy and I, locked us in that stinking hell, the only thought circling through my mind was you. I prayed you’d find us in time, that you’d dole out the harshest punishment you saw fit for the crime. I hoped all the slurs the pirate said about you weren’t true.”
“I don’t know what he said, but I can assure you they’re not.” He stroked his fingers over her cheek. “I thought you did not wish to rely on God?”
“The fanatical God of my father, I’d said. It doesn’t mean I plan to abandon my faith altogether, merely alter it to my needs. Having faith means holding onto hope, which I did the whole time in that terrible place.” Even when Tommy had been so horrendously killed in front of her she’d never given up the hope that Adrian would find her in time. Inside that horrible cell, the realization of all he’d done to shield her from the worst of the men’s nature had never been so clear.
It had humbled her to the depths of her soul. In the darkest hour of need, she knew, without a doubt, what Adrian meant to her. “Thank you for coming to my rescue.”
“I pledged you my protection. I could do no less than follow through.” His arms tightened slightly around her. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought you hate my tendency for violent justice.” Gooseflesh crept over her skin. His breath warmed the shell of her ear. “Or have you changed your mind?”
“I do hate the violence.” She’d never forget Tommy’s memory or how he fought to keep her safe. He would have been a fine gentleman who would have learned from the best. “But perhaps, at times, violence is the only clear way. In this instance, I believe it
was warranted.” She shivered while he licked at her earlobe then continued a lazy path along her neck. “Was it wrong I wanted that man to die, or that I felt a morbid joy when you shot him?”
“No, love. I warned you life on the sea is hard. It’s dirty, gritty and violent at times, yet there is justice, and there is joy. You learn to grab hold of the good moments when they come and don’t question the why involved.” He nipped at the underside of her jaw.
His attention did much to blot out the horrors of the night. “True.” Being with him had become one of the happy moments she looked forward to during the long hours of the day while they were apart. “It might take some time for me to not see those images when I close my eyes, but I’ve made my peace with this life.”
A barely audible sigh shuddered from him. “I meant what I said in the hell, Sarah. You are mine, for as long as you wish it.”
When he slid his heated mouth to her throat, her breath stalled. “I… I would enjoy it very much.” Heavens, that wasn’t what she’d meant to say at all, but the insistent brush of his tongue over her collarbones scattered her thoughts.
“Come to bed. Let me worship you, show you how much I adore you.” He tugged her away from the door and into the middle of the cabin. “Finding oneself alive at the end of battle deserves a reward and always requires reaffirmation that life is good.”
“I haven’t cleaned from the fight. I’m dirty and—”
“You’re beautiful.” The simple words were accompanied by a grin that didn’t hold his usual beguiling charm. “You always will be thus to me.”
Her heart lurched from his tenderness. “Are those merely words designed to coerce me into your bidding or do you truly care for me?”
“I care.”
As her pulse tripped erratically through her veins, she tried to keep her breathing even. “Both sides of yourself, or merely the man you are inside this cabin?” She trembled as he worked the laces at her bodice. His fingers brushed her skin.
“When I am here with you, when we are together intimately, sharing each other in carnal ways, I care. When I am outside in every other corner of this ship, orchestrating everyone’s life, keeping order, administering punishment, I care.” He gently turned her around and then worked the laces at the back of the dress. “You are always in my mind and most recently, in my heart. Though I may not say it in the words you wish, never doubt me. My actions are enough. You must square with that.”
A small seed of disappointment took root deep within. Why wouldn’t he say what she could clearly see written in his expression? On the other hand, why couldn’t she? In the end, it didn’t matter. He was hers for this moment, and any others she might wish, he’d said that as truth. He couldn’t separate himself from either persona; she didn’t know if she wanted him to try. Both sides of his personality had created the man he was—the man she wanted for more than the nights. For now it was enough, and she’d enjoy him for as long as he’d let her.
“I have accepted it.” She met his gaze, hoping he’d see what he needed in her eyes. “I only want you, Adrian. It matters not which you choose to be.”
“You’ve made me a happy man.” Seconds later, he unbuckled the weaponry belt she’d taken from a dead man. It fell to the decking with a dull clamor. The dress, sufficiently loosened, sagged off her shoulders. Adrian pressed tiny kisses to her nape while sliding the gown and the petticoat down over her breasts and off her arms. The fabric hung awkwardly around her waist, but he pushed it from her hips. It pooled at her feet. She glanced over her shoulder but couldn’t see him as well as she liked.
“Adrian…”
He didn’t answer in words. Instead, he nuzzled the spot where her shoulder joined her neck as he cupped her breasts from behind. The warmth from his body against her back, the rough scrape of his calloused palms on her skin and the cooling trace of his tongue between her shoulder blades sent heat rushing through her limbs to gather between her thighs.
“Dear God, please say you don’t mean to torment me this morning of all mornings.” She dropped her head back as he rolled her nipples. Pleasure laced with pinpricks of pain rippled through her.
“Oh, but I do.” He squeezed her breasts, his fingers hot on her skin. “At a battle’s end feelings of gratitude and lust, not to mention the desire to embrace life and celebrate victory, need an outlet. Today, I’m glad to be alive and know you’re beside me.”
“Is that all?” Why did she need to push him into a declaration? He slid a hand over the curve of her stomach then lower to play at her curls. Her belly tightened.
“Patience.”
She had none where he was concerned. Every time he entered her vicinity, she wanted to experience everything he had to give. Adrian slipped his fingers through her wet folds. She released a desperate whimper. So long had it seemed since he’d pleasured her, a lifetime had passed since they’d last been together. They’d both met death and had come out more or less victorious. Fate had been kind, or they had been very lucky.
“Spread your legs, Sarah.” He kneaded one of her breasts with his free hand. “Let me in.” Insistence rang through the baritone directive.
The moment she followed his order, he pushed two fingers inside her channel and his thumb found the hidden, aching bud she wanted him to touch. Shivery sensation danced over her skin, burning through her blood as he worked his magic. With every flick of his thumb, every gentle pump of his fingers, desire coiled and built, intent to become a living entity that would devour her. She covered his hand, pressed him tighter against her, guiding him to the spots that gave her the most bliss. All of this she’d learned by his tutelage. All that she was she gave to him.
“I have taught you well.” His smug chuckle warmed her ear and mirrored her thoughts, but he let her assume command. “Where do you want me, love? Guide my fingers.”
Sarah’s mouth went dry. She lifted a hand to the breast Adrian ignored and plucked at its nipple, gasping. Intense threads of feeling streaked into her core, adding to the sweet torture he conducted. As wonderful as his fingers in her passage were, she craved the feel of his cock more. “Almost. I need…”
“This.” He withdrew his fingers only to circle his index finger around her button. “Or perhaps this will send you over.” He pinched the swollen nub with light force and then strummed his fingers over the sensitized flesh. His other arm went around her waist. It was the only support keeping her upright as her body lost the ability to stand.
“Yes. Oh, yes.” She loved the seconds just before she came undone, as her body tensed, straining toward that one grand moment that would send it into the ether. The world tipped sideways as the rushing chasm of release swept her on its tide. Her inner muscles contracted with the waves and pushed sated pleasure throughout every nerve ending. When she slumped, Adrian lifted her in his arms.
“Watching you chase release is quite erotic and renders you even more beautiful besides.” He carried her to the bed and deposited her upon it, looming over her. “Be warned, in the future I very well may order you to pleasure yourself while I observe. I cannot imagine a better reward after a day full of hard labor.”
Sarah pulled him down and gave him an open-mouthed kiss. She forgot her aches and pains. In the face of Adrian’s tender ministrations, she put the trials she’d been through from her mind. “I am beyond caring, pirate. You can order me to mend sails because at this moment, I am floating. Your touch sends me to the heavens. For that there is nothing equal in this life.”
“I’m glad to hear it.”
She released him, watching him from under her lashes. “However, if your naked ass isn’t in this bed with me soon, I might take up with Brax.” She wanted to feel him moving within her body, craved the weight of him on top of her.
He lifted an eyebrow. “You wouldn’t enjoy being Brax’s lover. There are rumors aboard that he only thinks of himself.”
“Hmm, should I continue looking then? There are plenty of men on this ship.” The banter between them
was almost as good as physical relations. With Adrian, she’d never grow bored.
“You can, or you could wait until we are finished this morning. I would hate for you to make a decision without having a comparison.”
All levity froze. “My mind won’t change regarding you.”
He unbuckled his belt and dropped it and the weaponry to the floor. “Indeed, I fear it will not.” He sat in one of the chairs and yanked off each boot. They fell to the decking with a heavy clump.
“Does this make you angry?” She bit her bottom lip and waited, not wanting to hear his answer.
“No. It merely bolsters my own courage, yet I wonder where your bold attitude came from.” His grin took the earlier lines of exhaustion and grief from his face while he stood.
“Must be the company I keep.”
“Perhaps.” He tugged the muslin shirt over his head. The glorious expanse of his chest gleamed bronze in the morning sunlight. Her nether regions throbbed with need as passion for him reprised its call. “Are you quite certain in your intent, Miss Covington? I have heard pirates will blacken a person’s soul.”
“Either that, or they will steal it along with a woman’s heart.” She held his stormy blue gaze, willing him to understand her next statement. He needed—no deserved—to hear everything. “I cannot think of a better man to keep both safe for me.”
Adrian paused in the act of unbuttoning his breeches. For the space of a heartbeat, pure happiness danced in his eyes, quickly followed by a much stronger, deeper emotion she refused to name for fear she’d misinterpreted it. “That is perhaps the greatest compliment I’ve ever been given. I shall endeavor to be the best of guardians for them.”
