All I Want is You

by Patricia Mar

Her father and her mother were there, her Aunt Nora with her husband Sauro, Alessia with Gabriele and the two children, and her grandmother Glicine was at the head of the table, sitting next to her. Uncle Carlo and Aunt Mara, Glicine’s brother and sister, both widowed but lively and full of life just like their sister, were there too. Her family genes had given them all the secret of a long, rich and healthy life.

  Daniel and Caterina were sitting next to one another, and since they had taken their places, they had done nothing but talk. Pure terror. What could she be telling him that was so embarrassing it kept making him smile? Maybe about that time when Giulio Carneri, just sixteen years old and covered in sports, had come to her house and asked her out and her mother had dragged him off to ask him if he knew how important it was for young people to be aware of the various methods of contraception available? Giulio had stared at her in terror, as though she’d been a transformer or a mogwai that was about to turn into a gremlin. She’d let him go soon afterwards, but from that day on Giulio, who had never so much as touched her by accident, stopped telling her she was pretty the way he always had before. He’d just stood there in shocked silence, terrified at the thought of getting her pregnant by just looking at her.

  Sara found herself coming out of her wine induced coma with a jerk when her grandmother’s elbow nudged her, violently. “You’re in a trance, my girl. Relax… With all that wine in your body, you should be walking on air.”

  “Daniel is at the mercy of your daughter.”

  Grandma Glicine grimaced. “Judging how wide open her mouth is, I reckon it’s your mother who’s at the mercy of your boyfriend!”

  “Do you think so?” Sara narrowed her eyes and peered over at them.

  Caterina’s cheeks were flushed and she kept smiling all the time and raising her hand to her mouth in a coquettish way.

  “She won’t start playing footsie with him, will she?” Sara asked pleadingly. She wondered why she couldn’t get that image out of her head.

  “I don’t know, but I know that I would! You’ve chosen yourself a gorgeous young man, my dear. He was well worth the wait.”

  Sara sat up in her chair. “She can’t believe her luck that she ended up sitting next to him. She’s practically taken him hostage!”

  “She wasn’t going to let such a wonderful opportunity pass her by. She’s been trying to get you to come here for months. She’d even started talking about organising a surprise attack.”

  “What?”

  “I only got her to change her mind by reminding her that you would be here at Christmas.”

  “Thanks, Grandma,” Sara sighed gratefully.

  “But Sara, why are you getting so worked up? You know that Caterina is completely harmless.”

  “I think it’s because she’s made me so embarrassed and uncomfortable in the past, and on more than one occasion, that it’s given me this ridiculous fear about what she might do.”

  “You’re not thinking about Giulio again…”

  “No, no, absolutely not,” lied Sara.

  Her grandmother gave her a sympathetic look. “Daniel is a wonderful man. He is kind, patient and above all, he’s in love.”

  Sara found the features of her own face softening as she watched him. “I love him so much that it feels like my heart’s going to explode. I could never have imagined feeling anything like this, not even when I dreamed that Prince Charming would come and save me from the dragon.”

  “Your mother the dragon?” giggled Glicine.

  Sara laughed. “Something like that, yes.”

  “My dear princess, your Prince Charming is here and he adores you,” said Glicine. “Don’t worry about your crazy mother scaring him off – in my opinion, he will love you even more when he begins to understand her.”

  Suddenly Daniel turned to Sara and gave her a sweet but also very compassionate look.

  “What can she have told him?” she asked Glicine, sitting up straight in terror. “Mum?” she said, in a louder voice than usual. “What are you two talking about?”

  From the other side of the table, Caterina gave her a carefree smile. She was wearing a very low cut white silk blouse, she wore a pearl necklace and her dark hair was loose and shiny. Her make-up made her look fabulous and her efforts to look twenty years younger had paid off handsomely.

  “My dear, I was just telling Daniel about the time when you were twelve years old and you found yourself with your legs on show at the bus stop.”

  “Oh, that!” Sara put her hands to her face in shame. It had been years ago, of course, but,it was the kind of adolescent nightmare that traumatised people for the rest of their lives, for God’s sake.

  “What happened?” asked Alessia, who had overheard the conversation. “I don’t remember.”

  Fantastic, now that episode would become public knowledge. Sara poured herself another glass of wine, ignoring the expression of reproach on Aunt Nora’s face as she sat down in front of her.

  Caterina didn’t have to be asked twice. “Well, when she was young, Sara was very easily distracted.”

  “That’s not true,” Sara cut in, failing in her attempt to count to ten in order to calm the angry fires of revenge that had started blazing inside her.

  “Let mummy tell the story, darling.”

  Sara smiled and folded her arms. At that moment, from the other side of the table, Daniel winked at her and that was all it took to make her smile.

  “So anyway, as I was saying. Sara was always easily distracted, always with her head in the clouds. One spring morning, she was waiting for the bus for school. She’d decided to wear a light skirt with a floral print that came to just below her knee. She hardly ever wore skirts because she was convinced she had ugly legs.”

  Daniel gave her an intense look as though to say, ‘I know different,’ making Sara blush.

  “When the bus arrived, it was packed, and so that she wouldn’t get pushed against the doors by the other kids who were pushing to get in, Sara moved aside, and the driver, without realising, closed the doors. But somehow, her skirt had got tangled up in them.”

  Alessia raised a hand to her mouth. “Oh no!”

  While Virginia snorted hysterically and Caterina nodded, Sara’s face grew even redder. “The bus set off and took her skirt with it, and she was left standing there in just her underwear, in front of everyone. And all of her classmates who were on the bus saw the scene. Sara just stood there in her pink panties, absolutely mortified and with tears streaming down her face.”

  “Oh my god, how humiliating,” cried Alessia, while Tommaso burst out laughing. “Auntie Sara in her undies – that sounds amazing!”

  “Thank you, Mum, for reminding me of one of the most embarrassing moments of my life,” said Sara, feeling piqued. She searched for Daniel’s eyes, and when she found them, he gave her a sympathetic look.

  “Come on, love, don’t take on so,” said Nora, trying to cheer her up. “That was a lifetime ago!”

  “There are some memories you never forget,” replied Sara as she relived that moment of mortification: the infinite embarrassment, the giggles when she passed by her classmates to get to her desk, wishing that she could sink into a hole big enough and black enough so that she could disappear for ever.

  “But sweetheart, you’re a grown woman now, and it’s time to laugh at these memories,” said Caterina with a benevolent smile. “It was a long time ago.” It was evident that she had absolutely no idea how much that episode had undermined her daughter’s self-confidence for months, maybe even for years.

  “Auntie in her undies!” Tommaso kept shouting as Gabriele tried to keep him in order.

  “I’m going to get the dessert,” proclaimed Nora as she started to collect the dirty dishes from the table.

  “I’ll help you!” replied Sara, grateful for an escape route. If she moved away from the table, maybe that topic of conversation would end there. Too bad that her wounded pride – the wounded pride of the clumsy, dreamy girl she had once been
– still made her weep bitter tears.

  Without listening to the chatter of her relatives, who she adored in spite of everything, she kept her head bowed as she went towards the kitchen, a pile of plates in her hands, being careful not to drop any of them.

  That would be the icing on the cake.

  5

  In the Kitchen

  Noticing that Sara hadn’t come back into the room, Daniel decided to go and look for her. He found her standing in front of the window, looking distractedly out and immersed in who-knew-what thoughts. She was probably enraptured by the sight of the snow that was falling copiously, covering everything and making everything sound distant and muffled by the comforting silence. Daniel looked forward to the idea of walking with Sara through the streets of Gubbio and of breathing in the romantic air with her by his side.

  Quietly, he went over to her and circled her waist with his arms, drawing her to him, then he rested his chin on her head. “What are you thinking about?”

  Sara squeezed him tightly – his warmth was exactly what she needed. “How stupid I am that I let myself get so wound up by her?”

  “Maybe just a bit. But then, you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t do that adorable frown of yours occasionally.” He stroked her eyebrows with his fingertips. “I love it when you blush and when you wrinkle your nose and pull a face. You look good enough to eat.”

  “If you carry on like this, I’ll have to take you upstairs to the bedroom,” she laughed, sounding more relaxed. Finally, she let her shoulders relax and abandoned herself completely to him. “Admit it: my mother is impossible.”

  Daniel lowered his head and kissed her neck. Breathing in her scent and caressing her skin was almost a necessity for him. Sara’s heart was pounding – he could feel it clearly as his lips lingered on the point that pulsed and drew him in like a magnet. He spoke without pulling away from her. “She talks a mile a minute and it’s impossible to get a word in edgeways, but she’s sweet and she’s very…”

  “Embarrassing?” Sara sighed, suddenly feeling less calm again.

  “… modern. Let’s say modern.”

  “I hope she didn’t ask you how many times we do it a day. Because she would you know.”

  Daniel couldn’t hold back a loud laugh. “Not quite, but she did point out to me that clinical studies prove that having plenty of sex prolongs your life. And she wants you to have a very long life. And so do I.”

  Smiling jauntily, Sara turned to face him, her eyes shining with desire and love. “Since when have you and my mother been working as a team?”

  “Since I decided that her way of thinking fits in pretty well with mine – meaning, having sex with you at all hours of the day and night.”

  She hugged him even more tightly and looked up, leaning forward to put her lips against that divine mouth of his. Daniel responded to her invitation and reciprocated, sealing that moment of stolen intimacy with a dizzying kiss. He might have only gone there to comfort her, but in a few moments a fire had started burning between them which could have carbonised Aunt Nora’s fish.

  His mouth, thirsty for love, devoured every inch of her lips, tasting them with meticulous attention. He realised that it was not the most opportune moment but he wanted her, and he had wanted her all the way through dinner. The more Caterina spoke about Sara, about her gaffes, her successes and her disappointments, the closer Daniel felt to her. He had almost been tempted to get up from the table in front of everyone, go over to her, take her face in his hands and kiss her. Sara had got inside him: she was the air that he breathed, she was part of him, and to imagine her younger, in a distant life, filled him with curiosity and emotion. He’d wanted to get to know her, he’d wanted to know everything about her, and that was what Caterina had given him.

  Now Sara was in his arms. A few metres away in the next room there were her relatives, but Daniel didn’t care that they knew how important she was to him.

  Sara responded with passion to his intense and perhaps inappropriate kisses, to the caress of his tongue, so delicate and determined. She’d let herself go – she’d stopped using her head and was using her heart.

  Reluctantly, Daniel pulled away from her, panting like a desperate man. “I’m tempted to take you upstairs and not back in to dinner, but we’d better not cause a scandal, otherwise that close encounter between your skirt and the bus door won’t be at the top of the list of most embarrassing moments of your life.”

  “God, I want you so much!” said Sara, breathing hard. It felt as though there wasn’t any oxygen in the room – that kiss must have sucked it all away.

  “Come on, have some mercy on me – don’t say that, please.” Daniel looked at her for a moment before letting her go, Their faces were flushed, their breathing rapid, their lips swollen. They smiled at one another, complicit: they understood each other immediately, and it was sublime.

  “Before you go, close your eyes, though.”

  Sara looked at him in surprise. “What have you got in mind?”

  “Don’t be cheeky, and close your eyes,” said Daniel.

  Sara obeyed.” What are you doing?”

  “I was going to give you my present later, but maybe this is the perfect time.”

  Sara opened her eyes and saw the envelope that Daniel had placed in her hands a moment before. Feeling intrigued, she opened it quickly. “Daniel, there are two air tickets to Sydney here.”

  “Yep. I thought I’d give you a special surprise. I know how much you wanted to go there, so I booked two weeks in February, for Valentine’s Day. You and me, nobody else: we have the right to spend some time together alone.”

  Feeling slightly panicked, Sara swallowed nervously. “I hope I’ll be able to get the time off for Valentine’s Day. I haven’t taken many holidays yet, and two weeks are a lot, I don’t know if…” Her heart was pounding with delight at the wonderful surprise and fear of not being able to get the necessary time off work: disappointing Daniel would have broken her heart. She bit her lip and hugged him even more tightly. “Thank you, my love. It would be wonderful to go away together.”

  Daniel hid his face in Sara’s neck and half closed his eyes to savour the moment. “I miss you,” he admitted. Damn it, he had really said it out loud.

  She searched his face uncertainly. “I’m always here for you.”

  “You know what I mean – I’m starting to hate this job that keeps me away from you.”

  “Don’t say that.”

  “Over the last few months I’ve travelled a lot and we’ve seen a lot less of each other than I would have liked.”

  “I know, and I’m really sorry too, but what alternatives do we have?” she said, studying the tickets she held in her hands apprehensively.

  “Sooner or later it’ll become a real problem, and I don’t want it to. I don’t want anything to cause problems and drive a wedge between us.” Daniel’s voice had become serious and although his Italian was still excellent, his English accent had grown stronger.

  “That won’t happen! We love each other and we want the same things… A house together, a family… We’ll have everything.”

  “I’m worried about the distance, I’m afraid you’ll get tired of me.” Talking to her about it made the situation seem more real.

  Sara was genuinely surprised. Did Daniel really think that was possible?

  “You’re crazy, Daniel Gant! Me, get tired of you? If anything, I’m the one who risks becoming boring – you’ll meet some model with the longest legs in the world and a backside like Jennifer Lopez and you’ll leave me.” She was trying to keep the tone playful, but her words were full of real fear.

  “Never say that again – there’s nobody else for me, and I hope you believe it.”

  She raised her arms and drew him to her. “Perhaps we love each other too much and we’re just terrified at the thought of losing each other.” She stroked his frowning forehead and he started to feel relaxed again at her touch.

  “We’re a couple of
idiots, I realise that. I’d like to have you at my side all the time. I often find myself alone at fashion shows and parties that I have to go to, and you aren’t there and I feel weird. A part of me isn’t there, it’s with you.” He stroked her face and Sara lost herself in his touch, even though a feeling of sadness had settled in her heart and it was hard to make it go away. It was painful for her to know she couldn’t be at his side when he was away. She trusted Daniel and didn’t doubt his love, but it still hurt.

  “It isn’t easy for me either.”

  Daniel kissed her with all his might. He wanted to eliminate that distance, wipe away the worry that undermined their serenity. When they pulled away from each other, they were smiling. This wasn’t the right moment to try and deal with their problems: there would be a time and a place to do that.

  Daniel took her hand and held it tightly in his own. “We’d better get back out there with the others – we have to celebrate Christmas Eve.”

  “And there are the presents to open as well,” added Sara.

  As they walked towards the door, Daniel stopped and frowned. “Right now, the only thing I’m thinking about is opening the best gift of all at the end of the evening…”

  Sara laughed. “Well, if you’re lucky, maybe my skirt will get caught in your hands later.”

  “Don’t wear your skirt tonight.”

  “That can be arranged.”

  With smiles on their faces, they returned to the others. After all, dinner still wasn’t over.

  6

  Grandma Glicine and the Pearls of Wisdom

  Dawn was breaking when Daniel woke up. He felt strangely uneasy, and had that sensation of having had a nightmare but then not being able to remember anything about it. Carefully, he sat up in bed, trying not to wake Sara. She was sleeping soundly, curled up next to him, with a slight smile on her face. They were both still naked. The effects of sleep began to fade and he found himself becoming aroused by the closeness of her body.

  A weak light shone through the windows. His thoughts began to wander so to stop himself from taking a lock of her hair and running it between his fingers, or from kissing her on the mouth and then turning the gesture into an invitation to go further, Daniel, with a mastery acquired over the years, slipped silently out of bed.