by Jamie Hawke
“For protection,” she said then glanced down at my crotch with a chuckle.
“Grow up,” Pucky said. “But seriously, that will help shield against magic to a certain degree—at least get you to where we are now. It’s a low-level Warrior-class item.”
“Gotcha,” I said, glad I at least had enough power to manage this one.
“But then you’ll be able to handle cooler shit, so chin up, buddy.”
I laughed nervously, still not quite at terms with the idea that we were about to charge into a pizza place to go to war and hopefully free some Myths who’d been captured. At the moment, my mouth was really watering at the idea of pepperoni pizza, with the edges of the pepperoni burnt just right. Maybe some pineapple on there just to spite all the weirdos who didn’t understand the awesomeness that a pepperoni and pineapple pizza could be. Not that I needed it every time, so whatever.
Agh. I had to remind myself that we weren’t going in there for pizza at all. Not even a root beer. Damn, I’d have thought the Mexican would’ve tided me over, but it seemed to have fueled my appetite.
Or was it that, since getting bit by the wolf, and especially since seeing it manifest in me, I’d been extra hungry?
“Got your big boy undies on?” Red asked, walking past me toward the pizza place.
“I don’t know what that means,” I muttered, glancing over to Pucky at my side as we followed.
“I never get half of what she says,” Pucky whispered. “Just laugh along with it or she gets all emo.”
I nodded and chuckled, though it was too late. And strode right past a family who were leaving the pizza place and didn’t even notice our weapons.
“The wonders of magic,” Pucky said, grinning, and entered as I held the door for her.
While it looked like a normal pizza joint, the second we stepped inside it became clear this wasn’t the case. What looked like an image of an eagle over a cup of root beer turned its head and let out a screech that sent customers running. The old woman behind the register sprang into action, pulling two hot pans from the stone oven and charging us as the door slammed and chains dropped from the walls, hurtling inward.
“Fucking witch,” Red said, grabbing me and rolling together, so that we were out of the way of the chains. She was up and pouncing, blade tracing pink and red light as she nearly sliced into the witch, but a chain was flung down and wrapped around Red’s arm.
Now it was my turn, because Pucky was fighting off the chains and one of those glowing pans in the witch’s hands was coming for Red’s face. I drew the knife, but a chain came for me too. Thinking fast, I remembered I still had the taser, and instead of going for the witch, pulled the taser out and hit the chain with it. Electricity burst to life, flowing through the chains so that Red yelped and was flung to the ground, but the witch got the worst of it—as if the chains were part of her, she shrieked and crumpled to the ground.
I leaped over Red, taser still at the ready, and hit the witch in the fucking throat with it. Her eyes went wide and flames erupted from the pizza oven, her body convulsing. I lifted the taser as Pucky and Red ran for us, weapons ready, both shouting for me to finish her off.
With an upward thrust of the witch’s hand, the flames came again, this time whipping through the air and coming right at me! The taser found her again, causing the flames to pull back slightly, and then I took the knife and plunged it into her heart.
The flames were gone, even from within the oven, and she was dead.
“The Gingerbread Witch, some called her,” Red said, staring down at the corpse as it withered into a skeleton. Then a red ball of Ichor floated over to me, vanishing into my chest. “We thought Hansel and Gretel had done away with her…she went evil a long time ago and refused the choice to change back… apparently we’re going to have to talk to them about this.”
“Shit, who did they kill then?” Pucky asked.
Red shook her head, looking doubtful. “Never did trust those two. Could’ve been a lie to begin with.”
I sat there, chest heaving, unable to quite process that I’d just killed the witch from the Hansel and Gretel stories. The skeleton pirate had been one thing, but this was… it was too much.
“Are we… done?” I asked, feeling like I was about to collapse right there, or curl up into a ball and let them roll me out of there.
“Done?” Red laughed. “She was just the guardian. Now the real fun starts.”
“Fuck…” I didn’t even say the ‘me’ part, not ready for those kind of jokes at the moment. But pushing myself up to my feet, I said, “Upgrade time?”
“Every chance you get,” Red replied. I tried it by myself this time, taking the stone and doing as Pucky had shown me.
All I had was the Ichor this time, but noticed that receiving it had automatically given me mana, which was interesting. Pucky noticed it too, and explained that it was because I had defeated a witch, and a high level one at that.
“But would I have need of mana?” I asked.
“If you go Paladin, sure. Or if you change your class.”
I nodded, applying the Ichor to level up my Warrior class. A new window popped up with three options for what looked like warrior-based skill trees, the type that would later affect how best to become a paladin or whatever else I chose to specialize in.
One thing I remembered about some of the paladins was their use of shields—and since I didn’t want to die anytime soon, I figured going for a shield would be smart. Selecting the image of a shield, my heart thudded as the screen faded in place of an actual shield on my arm. It too faded a second later, but Red nodded as if that was normal and she approved.
“How’s that work, exactly?” I said.
“Like this,” Pucky replied, suddenly lunging forward and throwing a strike.
My instinct caused me to pull back and hold up my arm in defense, and instantly the shield returned. Pucky’s hand hit and she grunted, holding it with scowl of pain. It morphed into a smile and she said, “See?”
“Damn,” I said, really enjoying my new role in life. This was badass to the tenth degree.
“That time was subconscious,” Red explained, “but you’ll have to learn to harness it. As you go up levels, it should be able to last longer, too. And there will be other abilities you can add to the shield.”
“Ready,” I said, and saw that Red was over by the oven, glancing back at us with worry creasing her face.
“Ah, shit,” Pucky said.
“Yup,” Red replied.
“What?” I looked from one to the other, then back to the oven, finally getting it. “Don’t tell me we have to crawl in there.”
“What else would make sense?” Red asked. “Considering who we just fought.”
“Can’t we just bust a hole in the ground and fall down into their lair or whatever?”
She laughed. “Jack, Jack, Jack… How long would it take you to break through the floor? Assuming it’s just wood, maybe we could do it, but what if there’s cement, stone? We don’t know how this lair is set up, but I know we have an entrance here.”
“And if the fire starts up again and we’re all burnt to a crisp?”
“At least we won’t have long to think about it.” She gave me a hopeful smile, and started to crawl in.”
“No, I’ll go first,” I said and went over, readying myself with deep breaths.
But she glanced back at me, scoffed, and said, “Don’t be ridiculous, you’re the Protector. That doesn’t mean you’re the sacrifice, and it certainly doesn’t mean I need you to taste all my food to see if it’s poisoned.”
She climbed in, disappearing from view as her red cloak trailed behind.
“That was a bit of an exaggeration,” I said, frowning. “My going first was the gentlemanly thing to do, no?”
“Hey, I have no problem with you going first,” Pucky said. “But mostly because I want to stare at that cute ass of yours if it’s going to be the last thing I see before the fire kills me.�
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I chuckled nervously. “Deal, but only because I’m a gentleman.”
“Lead on, kind sir.” She hesitated, grinned, and pointed at her horns. “And don’t worry, I won’t poke you.”
“Oh, God,” I replied with a laugh that certainly helped with the nerves.
Taking in a deep breath and psyching myself up for confidence, I heaved myself up into the pizza oven and followed Red. She must’ve been correct about the oven, because she was now far enough back that I couldn’t see her, only darkness, and no oven I knew of was that deep.
13
There wasn’t exactly darkness as I’d expected, but a sort of shimmering wall of black, one that moved like a vertical pond.
“Your amulet should help you through,” Pucky said from behind. “Go on. No hesitation, no doubt.”
I knew she could only see my ass but nodded anyway, really hoping I wouldn’t fart like this. How embarrassing that would be, I thought, but at the realization that it was such a trivial thing to be considering, I pushed forward with ease. Cold air passed over me and then faded, the shimmering liquid wall fading at my touch. No, not the wall fading, I saw—the rest of it. Then I was through, in a hideout supposedly beneath the place.
Stone walls rose around me, curving into an arch above my head. Pucky followed, emerging from an old fireplace lit with black and green flames, but she had a darkness in her eyes. I stared, curious, confused by the anger rising inside of me.
Red stepped between us, gripped my amulet and pressed it to my heart as she said, “Resist.”
I focused on her, those comforting eyes welcoming me, and the shadow was gone. When I saw Pucky again, it was clear whatever had been taking her over was gone as well.
“The amulet wasn’t quite strong enough,” Red explained. “But you’re getting there. Your spirit isn’t exactly that of a Normie anymore—not one hundred percent.”
“And if it was?” I asked.
“That spell,” Pucky chimed in, as Red looked away, troubled, “it pulls out whatever shadows you have hiding. My connection to my sister, for example—I can’t escape it. You and this wolf within you.”
“That’s what bothers you,” I said with the realization, addressing Red. “The wolf, Red Riding Hood…”
“We’re linked,” Red said. “Not like Pucky and Riak, but in a way that ties our spirits together. Sharon—the current Big Bad Wolf—would have you as a pet if you gave over to those tendencies, to the darkness. You’d essentially be one of her playthings, and she has several.”
“One of hers instead of yours,” I said to both of them, but their frowns showed they didn’t find that funny.
“You’re the Protector,” Pucky said. “Don’t ever forget that.”
“If anything, we’re here for you, not the other way around,” Red added. “This is your team, especially as you rise in power. You could throw us aside, find others—it would always be you, the Protector, and your team.”
“Throw you aside?” I scoffed. “Never.”
She gave me an appreciative nod then turned, holding her dagger out to show that it glowed gold, giving a more comforting light to our surroundings. It also revealed that the room wasn’t just any old room. There was a vertical shadow on one wall opposite us. We approached to find a narrow passage, somewhat hidden in that it curved back around the first wall. It led to a descending hall with tall arches.
Here, black flames danced on torches set at intervals along the walls. But as we descended, the flames began to leave their torches, gathering into the shapeless forms of Shades ahead of us.
“So it begins,” Red said, and then led the charge.
I had my magic blade out too. As we grew closer the Shades became knights in black armor with full helms and matching shields. They took up a defensive stance, long, dark swords emerging from their hands and held at the ready.
“She’s here,” Pucky said as we drew close. “Stay alert.”
There was no doubt that she meant her sister, the one I’d met with the agent when I’d been whisked away to the Fae world. For now though, I had to focus on the fact that we were charging into a group of badass knights from a spirit realm. Creepy, if nothing else, but I was a warrior now… a warrior with a little knife.
I had to laugh at myself, running in there with these two scantily-clad ladies, me in my street clothes with my ripped pants and thinking we could take on the knights. But I’d seen these ladies in action, and they had faith in me.
Plus, I had a badass shield skill now that I was itching to try out.
Red was the first to meet them. Her red cloak fluttered out behind her and then suddenly whipped to the left so that she moved too, out of the way of an attack, enabling her to slam her blade up into the knight’s throat underneath his helmet. Just like that, one gone with an explosion of gold light. Red cloth was already reaching out like tendrils and pulling her behind the last of the group before I reached my foe, Pucky leaping past me for the next.
A sword came at me. If it weren’t for those days of VR sword fighting and boffers at Renaissance festivals as a preteen—yeah, I stopped when I realized that as fun as those had been, they made me easy fodder for getting picked on—the idea of a sword coming at my head would’ve caused me to run away crying. Instead, I reacted instinctively, dodging left to avoid the overly aggressive strike that left the next knight open. I struck with my knife but hit metal. Damn. I’d been hoping the blade would take him down no matter where it hit.
He came back with an elbow to my side that sent me staggering backward in pain, and then the damn sword was up and slicing through the air again. I raised my arm as before, and the shield emerged—simple white with a silver glow—and the sword was deflected.
Instantly, the shield vanished. This was my chance to strike—now, before another attack came, before I had to find out if the shield would return right away or needed to regenerate. Knowing Red had scored her hit at the base of the helmet, I attempted to do the same. The knight blocked my pitiful strike with his shield, then came in for another slash with his sword.
How the hell was I supposed to be a Protector if I couldn’t even take down this one knight? To my relief, Pucky stepped in, grabbing the knight by the back of the helmet and yanking so that his sword fell, disappearing in black smoke as she said, “Now!”
I thrust, his neck totally exposed, and took him out so that he too vanished in smoke, leaving only the green prana that absorbed into me. It was a welcome boost of energy and confidence, especially considering the fact that there was no denying that I’d only managed to take this guy out because of her.
“Next one’s all me,” I said, and charged forward with a new determination to prove myself. Plus, Pucky was likely watching at that point.
Red had already taken out a third, making me feel even worse about it, and now the final knight was turning on her as if I wasn’t a threat at all.
“Hey, motherfucker,” I shouted, “I’m right here!” As he turned to me, swiping with his sword, I leaped into the air and hoped my shield would work—moving to block, I caught the sword with the edge of my shield as it returned, slamming it to the floor. Before he could block, I’d pushed him back with my shoulder and then, landing on top of him, drove my blade up into his neck.
Boom! Dead motherfucker.
“Not bad,” Red said, helping me up. “Though, if they haven’t already notified the others down here, your shouting probably did.”
“Ah, damn,” I said, but already the green prana was flowing into me and I felt ready for whatever they could throw my way.
“Color me impressed either way,” Pucky said, charging past and slapping my ass on the way. “But come on. Elisa’s in here somewhere, and maybe others.”
“And your sister?” I asked, surprised she wasn’t focused more on that aspect of our journey.
“Long gone,” Red cut in, then lowering her voice added, “And best not to talk about it.”
Indeed, when Pucky glanced over, t
here was a shadow across her face—darkness in her eyes that didn’t fit even down here. At least I wasn’t alone in battling my inner demons.
We kept moving, descending the rest of the way. At the bottom we emerged into a series of turns. As Red described it, it was a sort of maze that kept intruders from the inner sanctum of these enemy hideouts. It was also a sign that we were close.
She kept commenting on how strange it was that there weren’t more enemies here, at least if it was where they were keeping prisoners and expecting us to come for them.
Pucky was looking at the walls, horns glowing as she traced a pattern with her finger so we’d know if we passed that section of the maze again. A faint gold remained wherever her finger touched.
At a wall like all the rest, she paused, turned with a smile and said, “Maybe they weren’t expecting us.” She pushed on the wall. It vanished, revealing a large, octagonal room behind it. The other walls had more doors, interspersed with racks of swords, even a few rifles. In the middle of the room was what looked like a treasure chest with glowing red lines along the edges.
“The armory…” Red said, following Pucky in.
“Fucking loot!” Pucky said, going straight for the chest.
I was behind Red so couldn’t see the full picture of what happened next, except for hearing Red shout, “No, it’s enchanted for a—” and then get cut off as the chest opened in a flash of red light and purple fog. Pucky’s sister—the purple woman with the curved horns I’d encountered earlier—stood in front of us, on the other side of the chest.
“Ah, damn,” Pucky said, taking a step back.
“Their kind,” Red said with a sideways glance to me. “Can’t help themselves.”
“Our kind?” Pucky growled, glaring. “What? Sprites? Children of the Fae?”
Red pursed her lips, glaring, and nodded at the evil sister.
“It’s been too long, sis,” Riak said waving a hand so that black smoke circled the room, closing in on us and taking on the form of warriors as it did so.
