“Twenty-four years old, huh?” he asks, and for a moment, the static in my ears is so deafening I worry I might pass out. “You realize my daughter isn’t legal, right?”
Not true. Riley turned eighteen weeks ago now. And for the love of God, it wouldn’t matter here anyway. He’s trying to shake me—unfortunately, it’s working. I dare to look up at him, forcing a pathetic smile. “Officer McLeon.”
“Lincoln Sanders.” McLeon sneers. “I don’t think you appreciate the amount of effort that was put into tracking you down, boy.”
“I’m not sure what you mean,” I say. My voice trembles on each word and the blush creeps up my neck.
“Don’t play stupid with me,” he says. “I know all about you. I know you’ve been fucking around with my daughter.”
Wonderful. So I hadn’t been speeding—or doing anything illegal. I’m driving a vehicle registered in my name, and this maniac pulled me over for that alone. There would be no proving that, and I’m not stupid enough to accuse him of it. “Sir, I assure you—”
“Shut up,” he barks, and I shut my mouth. My grip on the wheel is so tight my fingers are changing color, numbness creeping in all the way up to my wrists. God, I think I’m gonna be fucking sick. “Bet you thought you were pretty slick. Stalking her to school, finding her car in that parking lot. Had your little ebony friends bust out the windows so you could look like one of the good ones, right?”
This man is a whole new level of fucked up. He pauses like he wants me to talk, to confirm or deny my relationship with the guys who attacked Riley. He hasn’t given me an order yet, so I keep quiet.
I take it back. This is why Riley’s been hiding. She has her own toxic behaviors, too, but how can she not when she grew up with a guy like this?
“That’s how it started, right? Instead of hurting the big, bad guy’s daughter, you just set out to screw her,” he continues. His voice grows louder with every damning word, until he’s practically screaming in my ear. “Two birds with one stone, right? Avenge your dirty little friend and fuck a pretty white girl, well, son, I’m not putting up with it.”
“I love your daughter,” I blurt before I can stop it. “It has nothing to do with you, or Phillip, or color, or anything, sir. I swear to God, I never set out for her because she’s—”
“I told you to shut up!” He slams his hand down on the roof of my car hard enough to leave an indent, and I flinch away in shock. Tremors wrack my shoulders and I close my eyes against the dizzying black spots dancing in front of me.
“I’m sorry,” I choke out.
“Where’d you meet her then? Hm?” he says. He hits the car again. “Answer me! If you weren’t stalking her, how long has this been going on?”
“Her friend’s birthday,” I say. I’ll tell him whatever he wants and deal with the consequences from Riley later. I just need to get as far away from him as I possibly can. “I met her at a party in the city, her friends all ditched her and we talked and danced and that’s it. She texted me after.”
“Oh, so it’s her fault,” he says. He scoffs at me and pushes off the car. “Keep your hands where I can see ‘em, boy. I swear to God, I won’t hesitate.”
He stalks back to his squad car and a sob works its way out my throat. Fuck, I don’t want to cry in front of this guy. The fear is all consuming, smothering me, and I have to fight the instinct to drive away tooth and nail. I glance up in the mirror, his face illuminated only by his computer screen as he punches in my information. I take a risk and grab my cellphone, sending off two texts—one to Rhett, and one to Riley.
“Go pick Riley up” with the location she sent me, and, “Your dad pulled me over.”
“Step out of the car.”
I drop my phone like it caught fire and grab the wheel with both hands again. Shit, I didn’t even hear him get out of his car again. “Wh-What?” I cough, trying to dislodge the lump in my throat. I’m a grown ass man approaching tears over a possible speeding ticket.
“Step out of the fucking car!” McLeon shouts. He pulls my car door open for me and flies backwards again, nearly in the middle of the road. “Put your hands on your head.”
I look up at him again, but my eyes lock solidly on the barrel end of his gun. His hands shake as he aims it at me, whether with nerves or rage, I don’t know. I do as he says, resting my fingertips behind my ears and shakily stepping into the road. Thank God I took my seatbelt off to get my license. “What’s this about?”
He flicks the safety off and takes a step toward me, his eyes wild when he growls, “You’re a fucking murderer.”
Okay, so maybe I’m a grown ass man approaching tears over the same bullshit we see and disregard on the news every other day. I’m gonna be the next corpse that gets shared around social media like a token “I’m Not Racist” pin, the next one that gets raged about for fifteen minutes before I’m completely forgotten.
I’m approaching tears because I’m the next one.
Shit.
Shit.
“Sir—”
“You were going to kill my daughter, weren’t you?” he snaps. His voice pitches on the last word, and for a minute, I think he’s just as afraid as I am. “Here I thought you were just raping her, but no, that’s not good enough for you people. A life for a life, right?”
Okay, alright, think calm. I can do this. I can explain and calm him down. Riley told me in detail about the threats, the reaction to his mistake she got online. She got targeted once in front of me, of course he thinks like this.
He’s acting like an absolute child, but that’s beside the point. I’d rather empathize now than leave this scene in a body bag.
“I’m not a killer,” I whisper, unable to force my voice any louder. “I was trying to save my mom—”
“Now you’re gonna lie to me?” he asks, stepping closer still. “I saw what I saw, you shot a man in your house. You think you can outrun your past? You think you’ll outlive that, that you can take someone as bright and perfect as my daughter and fuck her up with your filth?”
“This had nothing to do with you!” I insist. “Please, Officer, you have to understand—”
“I don’t have to understand anything, nigger, you do,” he growls. “Get on your fucking knees.”
“Thank you for stopping me,” I mumble.
Rhett snorts. It’s the first time I’ve seen him show any emotion besides cranky, wet-cat person. “Only ‘cause Linc would’ve been pissed. If I had my druthers, I’d have filmed it for the internet. Two racist white bitches throw down—I’d be making money off you for years.”
I bristle. I’m so tired of people calling me that.
I lost my nerve as Cheyenne was squawking at me. She had a bloody nose but was perfectly capable of spitting at me and calling me a bitch at the top of her voice. I think I called her a pig and told her not to contact me again.
She stormed down the road and bid Carly to go with her. Carly didn’t follow, didn’t really know what to do. She had tears streaming down her face, and was stuttering over her words, and couldn’t pick which one of us to follow.
Rhett piped up and offered her a ride. Cheyenne left on her own.
Probably the most satisfying thing I’ve witnessed in the last decade.
“I’m not a racist,” I say finally.
“Yeah you are,” Rhett says, a chuckle filled with years of bitterness following. “Racist doesn’t mean you’re actively out shooting people, kid, but you’re still white. You still benefit from it with your eyes closed and pretend it doesn’t happen. Linc told me all about your little speech—how you want to be better, make a difference and all that shit. And that’s good. But you need to drop your balls when it matters, speak up when you’re the only one someone will hear. Otherwise your actions are always gonna be louder than your private promises.”
I push myself further back in the huge truck seat, gnawing on my lip while I consider his words. They’re similar to what Lincoln said to me, how I have a lot of big-tal
k and no backbone to support it. Maybe Rhett delivered it better, or I’m less hurt by his opinion because he doesn’t mean as much to me.
He’s right. They’re both right. I’ve kept my head in the sand all my life, and I haven’t changed at all.
“You make Linc real happy.” Rhett taps his fist against my knee to bring my attention back to him. “Happier than I’ve ever seen him. I didn’t know him before he moved out here, I didn’t know he could smile that bright until you popped up with your annoying little messages.”
I grin in spite of myself. “He makes me happy, too,” I admit. “Happier than I’d ever thought possible.”
“Then you do you,” he says. “Keep improving. Stop acting like the two of you dating is some taboo thing—that’s bullshit. And anyone who thinks so is also bullshit.”
I snort. “I said that, in a way.”
“Then own it.”
He slows his truck and pulls slightly to the side, squinting against the bright lights on the side of the road. “What the hell is going on here?” he mutters.
I look up, trying to make sense through the glare. There’s only one cop, but he has the driver out of his vehicle, on his knees with his hands behind his head. The cop is yelling, what I can’t tell, but loud enough to rumble through the windows of the truck. What the hell could’ve possibly come up during a traffic stop to promote a cop to pull a suspect out of his car without backup? That’s a surefire way to get someone killed.
Rhett cups his hand and scoots further away, trying not to run anybody over and pull around at the same time. “Fucking pig,” he mutters. “Get out of the road.”
“It’s just extra,” Carly croaks, trying for some of her usual wit. She sniffles and swats at her eyes again, dropping her head to keep the tears hidden in the bright light. “Like, there’s no reason for that. Unless maybe he’s got a body in the trunk.”
The man on the ground is shaking so bad it hurts my heart. His head is down and his chest is heaving, gasping for air through his panic. He’s wearing a black shirt with purple boxes stacked on top of each other, big chalk lettering for the band name.
That’s...
The flashing lights turn away at just the right time, letting my eyes fully adjust and see his face. The pretty brown eyes shimmering with tears, the lazy five o’clock shadow, the short black curls that get thicker near the top of his head.
I glance down at my phone. I hadn’t read his text, for fear it was something to do with Rhett picking me up and how he didn’t want to see me.
Lincoln: Your dad pulled me over.
My dad pulled him over.
Dad.
I’ll kill him myself pulled him over.
“Wait, no, stop!” I scream, at my dad or Rhett or I don’t know. Whoever will listen. I wrangle out of the seatbelt and fling myself out the passenger door before Rhett even fully realizes what’s going on and rush at the two of them in the road, throwing my hands out in front of me as I rush up to Lincoln’s side. “Stop it, stop!”
“Riley,” Lincoln rasps from beside me. He sounds so small and scared, my big, powerful boyfriend reduced to this by someone who should protect him. I can’t look at him, can’t peel my eyes away from my father. “Don’t—”
“Shut up!” my dad snaps at him. “Riley, get out of the way. Now.”
“No,” I bark. “What the hell is wrong with you, he was coming to get me!”
“Damn right he was,” Dad says. He’s still got his gun up, aiming at Lincoln like he genuinely doesn’t notice I’m in the line of fire. He’s the one who taught me be careful where you aim, to know all your surroundings. How could he not back down when I got here? “I told you, star girl, I told you years ago they’re only after one thing. He’s only with you to hurt me, he admitted it!”
“I didn’t,” Linc says shakily. “I didn’t say anything like that.”
I know.
I believe him, without a doubt, without looking back to see what his eyes tell me.
I know Linc would never, the same way I knew my dad’s story was falsified all those months ago. My gut twists and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and I know I’m being fleeced.
“You’re a liar,” I say to my dad. “You gonna tell me he’s carrying a weapon, too, Dad?”
“You shut up.”
I startle at the venom in his voice, only to realize he’s not talking to me. He’s looking around me again, his eyes wide and vicious as he sneers at Lincoln. “Dad,” I snap.
“You’re a liar,” he growls, echoing my words to him back at Linc. “You ruined her, you’ve got her all twisted up in knots with your bullshit!”
“Mr. McLeon,” Carly calls from the window of Rhett’s truck. Neither of them have moved. Rhett’s face is so pale I worry he may faint, while Carly is flushed dark red, like all the blood has rushed into her face. “Sir, please, you’re not thinking clearly.”
“I did what I had to do,” Dad rambles. His hands shake so bad the gun rattles, his eyes alight with unshed tears. “Twenty-six years... I didn’t want to kill anybody. I’ve never had to kill anybody for this job, and one kid, one fucking kid ruins me! Ruins my career, my relationship with my daughter, my life. I died that day, too, but do you people care about that? No. You only care about yourselves and your fucking cult.”
My heart is breaking, but not for my dad. Not for Linc, either, but for myself. All the time I spent with him, all the amazing memories catch fire before my eyes. Tainted by his hatred, like motor oil dripping down priceless paintings. The imagery is beautiful, but you can’t see past the damage. Not anymore.
This is the real reason I didn’t want to tell him. I’ve known for a while, but I couldn’t admit it to anyone.
I knew I’d lose him, and I’m not ready. I’m not ready for this.
“Daddy...” I whimper. I have never felt smaller, more insignificant standing in front of him in all my life. He always listens, he always supports me. And here he stands, without a single fuck to give that he’s breaking me in to a million pieces. “Please, stop it.”
“Riley, move,” Lincoln says, his voice still dripping with terror but edged with urgency. There’s a darkness on my father’s face, a frantic look in his eyes as he glares at us both.
“Don’t you talk to her!” Dad snaps.
“Riley,” Lincoln says again. “Back off, get out of here.”
“Stop,” I say. I don’t know which one of them I’m talking to. I want all of this to stop. I’ll do anything to make the nightmare end. “Just stop, stop!”
“See what you did?” Dad yells. “Do you see what you’re doing to her?”
“Your daughter is afraid of you,” Lincoln snarls. “Not me.”
The next moments flash by in a blur. My dad hears Linc, in spite of having blocked out everything I’ve said, he registers the ice in his tone and takes it to heart. His eyes are blacked out with rage as he takes two huge steps forward and lowers one hand from his gun. His aim is screwed with a one-handed grip, but he’s not thinking right now—at all. Linc panics, and lunges forward to push me out of the way.
I use his crushing grip on my wrist against him and throw my momentum back into him as the gunshot rings back through the night. Lincoln stumbles back and hits the side of his car. I try to go with him, but my leg caves, and I collapse at his feet.
Everyone is screaming all of a sudden. Linc, my dad, Carly, even Rhett is making noise, and all of them are moving fast. So impossibly fast, it makes my head spin. This feels different than just an hour ago when Cheyenne pissed me off so badly, I couldn’t move. This is an involuntary numbness I can’t fight back.
“Troublemaker,” Lincoln prompts, his gentle touch on my cheek, his eyes wide as he hovers over me. “Hey, there you are. Just look at me, alright? Keep your eyes on me.”
My hand doesn’t move how I want it to when I reach out for him. I want to touch his face, soothe the worry lines from his forehead, but I can’t get control. I grip the collar of his shirt,
and his hand covers mine. His heartbeat is erratic. “What’s going on?” I ask, my voice weak and wet. Christ. What’s wrong with me?
Rhett is on the phone, sounds like he’s calling for an ambulance, while Carly’s scream pierces through the night as she screeches at my father. She’s pounding on his chest, shoving and pushing, her words coming too fast to understand as she holds him back from the three of us.
“Don’t worry about it,” Linc says. He swallows thickly, forcing a pathetic attempt of a smile. “You hang out with me, alright? Keep those pretty eyes on me.”
He shifts slightly as Rhett comes closer, says carefully, “They’re on the way. Put more pressure on it.”
Lincoln nods jerkily and presses harder on my waist. Pain lances through me and I cry out, and tears burn in his eyes. “Shh, I know. I’m sorry. It’ll be alright, Riley, I promise.”
I look down at his hands, see the blood pouring over his fingers before he can stop me. His other hand tilts my chin back up, whispering to me to stay calm. Calm. He wants me to be calm?
There’s a bullet inside of me. That’s what’s happening to me right now, the blood loss, the dizzying feeling like I can’t catch my breath or move about as I want.
He shot me.
My own dad shot me.
Panic seizes my throat, in spite of Lincoln’s tender touch and voice trying to tether me to the world. It’s too loud, the screaming, the pain, it overwhelms me. I close my eyes against it, and while I hear Linc telling me no, to keep my eyes on him, to stay, I drown in the darkness anyway.
“He is not welcome here.”
I knew McLeon would figure out I was sitting in the waiting room of the hospital sooner or later. Back up arrived shortly after Riley passed out, and he lost his mind and had me cuffed. He rode in the ambulance with Riley, and completely missed Carly flipping her lid on his partner and threatening to sue the whole department until I was released. They had nothing to charge me with anyway—McLeon had no reason to pull me over, and he didn’t give anyone a reason to before he was whisked away.
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