Beautifully Broken Pieces (The Sutter Lake Series Book 1)

by Catherine Cowles

  I don’t know how long we stayed like that. My knees throbbed and my back ached, but I didn’t move a muscle. Eventually, Taylor’s tears slowed. I trailed a gentle hand up and down her spine, hoping it would encourage her to calm further.

  I knew the moment she came back to herself because she tensed. I squeezed the back of her neck. “Don’t do that. Don’t freeze up on me now. Don’t shut me out. I’m honored that you let me in, even if I did kick down the door.”

  Taylor exhaled a breath, and it tickled my neck. Her face was still firmly pressed there. “I don’t know what to say.”

  “You don’t have to know.” I pulled back to gaze into those bewitching blue-gray eyes, rimmed red from crying. She flushed and turned her head away. I placed a single finger under her chin and brought her face back towards mine. “No more hiding.”

  Her throat bobbed. “Okay.” There was a moment of silence where we simply stared at one another, both of us with our walls completely down. “I don’t know what to do now,” she whispered.

  “I bet you’re exhausted. How about I put you to bed?”

  Taylor nodded, a light pink staining her cheeks. “I have a favor. You can totally say no if it’s too weird.”

  “What is it?”

  “Will you sleep with me?” Her voice wavered as if she were fighting against a new rush of tears. “I don’t want to be alone tonight.”

  I knew how much it had cost her to say those words. To make that request. And I was fucking honored. “I’d be happy to.”

  Carefully, I got to my feet with Taylor still wrapped around me like a sloth on a tree branch. I navigated around the living room furniture and finally made it to the master bedroom. Gently, I set Taylor down on the mattress. I pulled back the covers, and she quickly crawled under them. The light in the room was low, and I made quick work of shucking my shoes, pants, and button-down. I wouldn’t risk ditching my tee or boxer-briefs.

  Silently, I slipped beneath the covers on the opposite side of the bed and flicked off the lamp. The light from the full moon shone through the window to highlight the apples of Taylor’s cheeks and the fairest strands of her hair. I opened my arms. “Come here.”

  Instantly, she rolled into my embrace, her back to my front. I kissed the top of her head. “Sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

  28

  Taylor

  I awoke to a pink sky and strong arms surrounding me. I froze for a moment as memories from the day before assailed me. I felt as if I had lived twelve lifetimes in twenty-four hours.

  One of the arms around my waist tightened, pulling me flush against a wall of muscle. A trail of tingles shot through my nerve endings and grew in intensity as I felt something harden against my backside. Instinctively, I wiggled my hips.

  A growl sounded behind me. I stilled, my heart rate ratcheting up a few notches. “Be very careful, Short-stack. I’ve had your tight little body pressed up against mine all night. My restraint is about to snap.”

  My brows lifted. “I thought you didn’t want this.” The image of Walker pushing me away when I kissed him had played over and over in my mind the past few weeks. I still felt an echo of the pain the action had inflicted.

  Walker’s hand flexed against my hip, sending a jolt of arousal to my core. “I didn’t mean it the way you thought.” He rocked his hips against me, and I let out a little moan. “I’m very clearly attracted to you. I just knew it wasn’t the right time for us. And I wanted more than a drunken hookup from you.”

  My eyes widened, and my heartbeat picked up speed. “What do you mean?”

  In a flash, Walker was on top of me, hovering over my body. Not a single part of him touched me, and yet it was the hottest thing I’d ever experienced. “What I mean is—I want to explore what this thing is between us. Neither of us can know what the future will bring.” He ran his nose up the column of my throat. I trembled. “I think we should take things one day at a time, see where the road leads.”

  He sucked my earlobe between his teeth. “Because I am sure as fuck exhausted from not giving in to you.” I began to pant, it was pathetic. In a matter of minutes, he’d turned me into a quivering pile of need. “What do you say, Taylor?” He rose above me again so that I was staring into those gorgeous greens of his. “Want to see how hot this fire burns?”

  I fisted his t-shirt and pulled him to me with a force that surprised us both. Our lips crashed together in a battle for dominance. Each of us wanting to see how far we could push this chemistry between us.

  Walker’s tongue slipped between my lips, tangling with mine. His taste was like his smell—it had a quality that was uniquely him—and I knew it would spoil me for all other men. I didn’t care. I tugged at his shirt, needing it off, needing as much skin-to-skin contact as possible.

  The piece of clothing sailed to the floor, and then his hands were yanking at the hem of my tank. I sucked in a harsh breath when Walker’s thumbs trailed over my nipples as he lifted the shirt higher. He paused when the cami rested just above my breasts. “So fucking pretty. I want to see what shades these pretty nipples will turn when I suck on them.”

  His words sent a spasm straight to my core. My fingers dug into his muscular shoulders, and they flexed in response. “So stop staring and do something about it.”

  Heat and challenge blazed in Walker’s eyes. His head dipped. “Careful what you ask for…” he said and then took one of the peaks into his mouth with a force that had me bowing my upper body off the bed. This was no slow seduction. This was a full-on assault.

  Fire licked from my nipple to my clit, and he hadn’t even touched me there yet. I let out a barely discernable curse. Walker chuckled, sending another slew of sensations through my body. “Ready to beg for mercy?”

  “Never.” It came out as a half pant, half plea, and both parts said I was a dirty liar.

  “We’ll just see about that.” With those words, Walker turned his suckle into a nibble, and with each rake of his teeth across my tender flesh, another jolt of lightning shot to my center.

  He would be the death of me. I needed to fight fire with fire. I forced myself to release the vise-like grip I had on his shoulders and began raking my nails up his back in the same alternating pattern of pleasure and pain he was exerting on my nipple. Walker let out a guttural groan as I reached his head and grasped a handful of his hair with my hand.

  Pulling his mouth away from my breast, I brought it to my own. “I need more.”

  Another flash of heat and challenge seared those green depths. “I’ll give you more, but I’m taking my fucking time.”

  I grinned, but I had a feeling it was slightly feral with need. “Take your time next time.”

  “You make a damn good case for quick and dirty.” With that, he tore my tank top the rest of the way off my body and went to work on my sleep shorts. He pulled them down with a speed I didn’t know he possessed. His gaze zeroed in on the juncture between my thighs, and I fought the urge to squirm under his intense stare. “You’re bare.” His voice was rougher than it had been just seconds before.

  I cleared my throat. “I, uh, like it that way.”

  Walker’s hands gripped my thighs, pulling them apart, leaving me completely exposed. His eyes never left my center. “I like it, too,” he said, a devilish smile spreading over his face.

  My hands fisted the sheets as his hands slowly crept up my legs, closer and closer to the place I wanted him most. When he stopped just shy of where I needed him, I bit down on my lip. Hard. Walker’s gaze moved to my face. “Tell me you want this.”

  My eyes widened, and I released my lip. “I want this. Want you. Now.”

  He jerked his chin in a nod and gave me a swift kiss. Walker trailed the tip of his thumb down the valley between my thigh and center. I held my breath. He dipped the digit between my folds, and I couldn’t hold in my moan.

  Walker’s touch was feather-light. He explored each dip and curve and as his eyes stayed focused on my face. I realized he was s
tudying my reactions, discovering how to drive me higher. Each circle and swipe brought him closer to my opening, but he didn’t venture to that bundle of nerves that I knew would make me detonate.

  He eased a finger inside me. His strokes were lazy, as if he didn’t have a care in the world. But I was still in a hurry. I bucked my hips against his hand, and he stilled his movements. “Now, now. You in that much of a rush? You want it all?”

  “I want you inside me already. This is nothing”—I sucked in air—“but a poor imitation”—another breath—“of what I’m really after.” That did it. The last thread of his control broke.

  Walker left my body. For a moment, I thought he was pissed and leaving, but then I saw a flash of silver in his hand. A condom. He tore the wrapper with his teeth, and it was ridiculously hot. His other hand went to his boxer-briefs, pulling them down and shaking them off.

  My jaw went slack. He was perfection. I watched in fascination as he rolled the condom over himself. I swallowed hard. He was large. So big, I knew I would still feel him tomorrow. But there was also something about him that was beautiful. I didn’t think I’d ever considered a penis beautiful before, but Walker’s was. His skin was so smooth, the ridges so perfect, I fought the urge to lick my lips.

  Walker took three strides and was back at the bed. “Ready?”

  I nodded. My gaze traveled over Walker’s entire body. He was strung tight, like a bow in danger of snapping. I swallowed again. He leaned over me, brushing a gentle thumb across my nipple. I shivered. “Tell me if it’s too much,” he whispered.

  “I will,” I replied faintly.

  His tip nudged my entrance, and I felt a pull in me so strong, it was like being sucker-punched, as if my body already knew his and craved the touch with everything it had. I pulled in a sharp breath, and Walker’s eyes narrowed on mine. I nodded, trying to urge him on. He pushed inside me with a slow glide, the movement forcing my eyes closed so I could soak up the sensation.

  Walker stilled, and I was grateful. It took me a few moments and some deep breaths to adjust to his size. A fingertip circled the peak of my breast, and my eyes flew open. “So fucking beautiful.” This time, he was staring at my face when he said it.

  My cheeks burned, and my body seemed to melt. The stretching turned to heat. “Move,” I begged. “Please, move.”

  Walker dipped his head, brushing his lips against mine, and then he moved. Slowly at first, and then picking up speed. My hands clutched at his bunching bicep muscles, beginning to slicken with sweat. I wanted to feel as much of his skin as possible. My fingertips started to explore each curve and dent of muscle. His skin was silk over hardened steel.

  I trailed a hand through the dusting of hair on his chest I’d lusted after at the lake, pulling some just a bit. Walker let out a garbled curse, and his thrusts grew more frantic. Unbridled. The rhythm chaotic yet exactly what I needed.

  My arms fell to the bed, yet again feeling forced to fist the sheets to grab hold of something that could tie me to the Earth. Walker dragged a sandpaper-rough thumb across my clit, and the cord that had been steadily tightening within me snapped.

  My walls clenched around Walker, and he let out another curse, thrusting twice more before collapsing on top of me. We lay there panting, both still twitching with aftershocks. After moments passed, I groaned. “Move. You’re too heavy.”

  Walker chuckled but rolled us, taking me with him so that I was now lying on top of him. My cheek rested against his pec and vibrated with each beat of his heart, strong and steady. Slowly, my breathing evened out. “That was—” I began.

  “Explosive?” Walker finished.

  I pulled my head back and rested my chin on his sternum. Walker’s gaze traced over my face. “You’re not going to freak out and run on me, are you?”

  My whole body tensed, and Walker groaned. “Don’t do that. Unless you want me to fuck you again right now.”

  My eyes widened. “You could go again?” How was that even possible?

  He grinned. “You could have me ready to go just about anytime and anywhere.” I buried my face against his chest, feeling my cheeks heat. “I really don’t want to do this, but I gotta get rid of this condom.”

  Right. I nodded against his chest, and he rolled me yet again. This time, he slipped from my body. I felt the loss of him acutely, as if a part of me were missing. I shook off the ridiculous notion and reached for my tank and shorts as Walker’s tight ass disappeared into the bathroom.

  By the time he returned, I was fully clothed. His gaze raked over me from tip to toe. “I liked the other get-up better.”

  “Most guys do prefer naked.”

  Walker climbed onto the bed, backing me up against the pillows. “We need to make sure we’ve got a few things straight.”

  I sucked in a breath. “Okay…” My head spun at what he might be about to lay on me. This was a one-time thing, never to happen again? He wanted me to move to Oregon permanently and have a million of his babies?

  Walker’s eyes bore into mine. “You and I are going to see where this thing leads.” I pressed my lips together. “We’re not going to worry about all the possible what-ifs. We are going to roll with things. I’m going to have you. Often.” My lips stretched into a slow smile. I liked that plan. “I’m also going to be here for you.” My heart stutter-stepped. “No matter what does or doesn’t happen between us in the bedroom.” Another skipped beat.

  “And you are going to talk to me. Let me into what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours.” He tapped a finger on my temple and then let it trace down around my ear. I shivered. Walker pressed his mouth to my forehead, then to each of my eyelids. The gesture was so sweet, so tender it made my heart ache. “Do you think you can do that for me?”

  I took a deep breath. This was it. Could I roll with this, with him? Not knowing where we might end up? Having a good idea that the outcome might hurt a hell of a lot? There was something I needed to get out into the open first. I sank my teeth into my bottom lip before speaking. “Jensen told me about Julie.”

  Walker’s expression gentled, and then he sat next to me on the bed. “I would have told you about her myself, she just hadn’t come up.” He traced the hem of my sleep shorts with his finger. “She was my first love. If she’d lived, I think she would have been it for me. But what we had,”—his eyes met mine—“it never got the chance to grow out of that puppy-love stage.”

  My heart hurt for him, for the loss of what might have been. “I’m sorry you lost her.”

  Walker brushed his lips against mine. “Thank you. Life doesn’t always take us on a path we understand, but I know that even with the moments you think will break you, there’s always something beautiful waiting. If you keep pushing on.” He tucked a stray lock of hair behind my ear. “So, you think you can risk taking this journey with me? See where we end up?”

  I stared into those green irises rimmed in blue. There was fire in them. Flames that singed my soul. Something that was too tempting to leave alone. Even though I knew I’d likely end up burned. “I can do that.”

  Walker released a breath I hadn’t noticed he’d been holding. “Thank fuck.” I giggled. Freaking giggled. It was girlish and very unlike me, but I couldn’t help it. Walker’s eyes playfully narrowed in my direction. “Oh, funny is it? Hilarious that you’ve got me tied up in knots, my dick hard enough to pound nails whenever you’re around?”

  I bit down on my bottom lip and shrugged. “Sorry?”

  “You’re not sorry,” he growled and then dove in to tickle my sides.

  I shrieked with laughter until he touched a tender spot from my tumble down the ravine. I froze and sucked in a pained breath. Walker immediately pulled back, frowning. “Shit. I completely forgot. Are you okay?” He pawed at my tank top. “Let me see.”

  I let out a frustrated sigh. “I’m fine. Just a little sore.”

  “I’ll be the judge of that.” Walker gently lifted my shirt. “Turn around so I can see your back.�
� I did as he instructed, knowing it would go quicker if I just gave in. “Fuck. You’ve got a real nasty bruise and a few deep scrapes.”

  “I cleaned the scrapes last night,” I said, trying to put him at ease.

  “Well, I wasn’t exactly gentle with you this morning, so you need to let me clean them for you again.”

  I pressed my lips together to keep from laughing. “All right, Dr. Cole. Do your worst.”

  He placed a kiss at the base of my neck that sent tingles down my spine and slipped off the bed. When he returned, he had his boxer briefs and tee on and held a large first-aid kit.

  “Was that here?” I asked.

  “Yup, in the kitchen, beneath the sink.”

  “Good to know.”

  “Planning on injuring yourself in the future?”

  I snorted. “Well, I am trying to teach myself to cook.”

  “Are you now?” I felt a cold alcohol pad touch the small of my back and jumped. “Sorry about that.” Walker blew on my skin to ease the sting. “You know, I’m a real good eater. I eat just about anything, so I could be your guinea pig while you’re trying to learn.”

  This time I snickered. “You might regret that offer.”

  “I promise you, I won’t.” He kissed the top of one of my shoulders. He was careless with his displays of affection. Not in a bad way, just in a way that said he had a deep well of love and care in him that was so full, it was overflowing. It wasn’t surprising when I thought about it. He had amazing parents, a hilarious grandmother, a protective sister, and a precious nephew, who all loved him deeply. Not to mention, a town that adored him. He had a lot to give.

  I relaxed into the knowledge. It helped me to keep from freaking out about his frequent lip touches and gentle caresses. It was just Walker. I didn’t need to read anything into it.

  His roughened fingertips spread some sort of ointment across the scrapes on my back. I turned my head to the side, catching a glimpse of his shoulder. “Thank you.”

  “I’ll be here to take care of you anytime you need.”