I shiver and grab the photo book away from Delia, hoisting the heavily bound pages into my trembling lap. My palms are slick with sweat and my fingers slip on the edges when I try to leaf through the photos, but this is it. This is the only manual I’m going to get to decipher my new gift, and if I’m going to survive it, I need to find out who my imaginary friend was. I just hope I can before he or the shadow kills me.
“But what about the shadow?”
“Addie, what shadow?”
I need to tell her, but I can't talk anymore, my tongue won’t let me. All I can manage to do is leaf through the yellowed pages, hoping to find my answers as much as I hope that I won’t. They’re after me, the question is, why? Are they one in the same?
“ADDIE, DARLING, THAT’S enough.” Delia draws the photo albums away from my grasp with trembling hands. Her coarse hair is even more matted than before, and deep-set lines drag under her eyes as her mouth twitches to the side.
“No, I still haven’t found him,” I protest. My legs ache from sitting with them crossed all night, and there’s a thin layer of dried sweat sticking to my skin. The pressure in my head sends waves of dizziness through me as I move, and my muscles are stiff. There’s no telling what time it is, but since the banging has stopped, I’m guessing the sun has risen.
“You can’t spend all your time searching through old photos. It’s not going to help, trust me, I’ve tried.”
“So, what do I do?”
Delia stares at me like I’m a different person. Maybe I am now. Her lips press into each other as she deliberates, and just when I think she’s ready to speak, she climbs to her feet.
“You go about your life the best you can and let me try to figure out the heavy stuff. Your job is to let yourself be at more peace with yourself so that you can access the intuition you’ll need to become a full clairvoyant. Just, try to relax, darling.”
My mouth drops open, and even Marlowe looks cynical as she floats at Delia’s side.
“Yeah, okay, like that’s going to work.” I roll my eyes and reach for the photo albums again.
Delia catches my wrist and sets a rare glare of solemnity on me. “I’m serious,” she says. “Now, it’s been quiet for a good minute, and I seriously doubt any shadow creature is going to set upon you today. You’ve got shopping to do, and I need to put The House back in order and try to figure out what on earth has been going on around here.”
“You really expect me to go shopping right now?”
“Senior year starts in three days, and they won’t let you in the door dressed in cut off shorts. With how much time I spent getting you into that fancy school, you’re going to show up according to dress code. You better believe you’re going shopping.”
“IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT I wear, people are going to stare at me anyway.” Armed with a cup of coffee in my hand, and sunglasses to keep the fluorescent lights from completely killing my head, I lean against the dressing room door and dig my heels into the thin carpet.
“Let them stare! Nobody will be brave enough to say anything to your face.” Sabrina tosses a pair of jeans my way and hoists her pile of shirts and dresses onto the counter. “There’s six,” she tells the woman dispersing plastic numbers to hang on the doors.
“Uhm, one, I guess.” I hold up the jeans and receive a number in return.
“Leave the coffee out here,” the woman drones. Boredom is written all over her face, and I don’t blame her. The back to school rush has passed, and besides our small group, the store is deserted.
Leaving my drink on the counter, I trudge into one of the tiny stalls and reluctantly try on the jeans. I can’t get the taste of pennies out of the back of my throat, and despite Delia’s suggestion to relax, every noise echoing through the store sends my shoulders up near my ears.
“Nah, I’m vetoing that one,” Eden is saying just outside my door, and Miranda’s quick rebuttal is drowned out by the clashing of hangers screeching across a rack.
Groaning, I take the moment to slide onto the miniscule stool and rest my head in my palms. It was hard enough just trying to go to the bathroom by myself to shower this morning, how in the hell am I going to get any sleep later?
Click. Click.
Sitting upright, I drop my sunglasses and stare around me. A forgotten hanger is tucked in the corner alongside someone’s abandoned gum wrapper, and a flyer for a nearby taqueria is stuck to the wall. Nothing that should cause a clicking noise.
Click. Click. Clllliiiick!
What the hell?
I push my hands against the walls, ready to bolt in jeans that don’t yet belong to me, and the noise stops. Breathing slowly, I listen intently to the busied conversation outside and the clatter of employees’ footsteps. Nothing strange.
Lowering my arms, I switch back to my shorts, and just as I’m tying my laces, it starts again. Freezing with my hands on my boot, the slick feeling of legs crawling up my arm draws a strangled shriek out of my throat.
“Are you okay?” Eden bangs on the door first, followed by Miranda’s queries, and within a second, Sabrina is fighting against the bolted latch. “Addie?”
“Fine!” I gasp. “I’m fine!”
The only thing at my wrist is Frank and I blink at his glittering form.
Click, click.
His tiny pincers move just enough to illicit sound, and as I watch, he raises his head towards mine.
“Hey, Frank.” What else do you say to a sentinel? “Do you like your name?”
I don’t really expect him to answer, but he does, in the strangest nod I’ve ever seen.
“What the ever-freaking hell?” I half laugh, half cry.
An actual demon is hunting me in my haunted house, but hey, at least I’ve got a tiny metal pet, friend, thing? Nice consolation prize, universe.
“Okay, Frank. You’re cool. Uhm, maybe, can you help protect me?” Wow, I feel silly right now.
He clicks his pincers and lowers his head. I don’t know if that’s a yes or no. So, checklist; figure out if the little boy and the shadow are the same thing or not, and who/what they are... And how to talk to scorpions. Oh, and start school. This will be a fun fall.
“Sorry, I saw a bug,” I lie as I step out of the stall.
“Girl, no need to explain. After what you went through, I’d cry at bugs too.” Sabrina returns her number and half of her findings, and I grimace at the amount of work she’s just given the lady at the counter.
“Uhm, excuse me?” I ask as I hand her my door hanger as well. “I left my drink here?”
She sighs and turns her wearied gaze my way. Shrinking back, I hold back a frown. I’m the one with the missing coffee, she doesn’t need to look so aggrieved.
“Another customer knocked it over. He recognized your friend though, and I think he’s replacing it.”
“Thanks,” I let the word drop like an anchor and slump away. Just great. Eden and Sabrina are already at the register, but Miranda is nowhere to be seen. She must be off with the mystery boy, and hopefully replacing my missing coffee.
Sighing heavily, I pay for my jeans and throw in a cheap pair of earrings at the register, praying for another burst of energy. At least I have Frank to cheer me up. His funny little movements are more pronounced now that I’ve noticed them, and I hope nobody else catches sight of them.
“Addie! Hey!” Nick saunters up the sidewalk, Miranda at his elbow, and Owen leading the way with a scowl on his face. In Owen’s hands is a plain white cup that I really hope isn’t my coffee. Oh please, don’t let that be my coffee.
“Hey guys, what’s up?” I bite my lip and fall back behind Sabrina and Eden’s bursting shopping bags.
“Not much.” Nick shrugs just as Owen bypasses him to thrust the cup into my hand. Damn it, now I’ve got to work at being nice to him.
“Here,” he growls. His irritated attitude is nothing like the laid-back countenance his brother favors. “I knocked yours over,” he explains with his tone just a bit softer. “I�
��m sorry.”
“No worries, uhm thanks.”
He grunts and our expanded group moves on, heading for more stores. Huh, I guess I don’t have to be that nice.
“Is he always so grumpy?” I ask Nick. The tension between us is very nearly a physical thing, and I walk on the edge of the sidewalk to avoid bumping my arm against his. If he has any lingering feelings of fear from the Fourth of July, he doesn’t show them.
“No, he’s just a jerk when he’s nervous, and he’s usually not. Nervous, I mean.”
I watch as the others push each other and joke around, and heat rises to my cheeks as I feel Nick’s steady gaze on me. I hate the way he makes me feel; desirable and exciting and altogether wrong at the same time. It’s disorienting, and especially cruel considering what a poor match we’d be. I wish he’d stop looking at me like that.
Clearing my throat, I pick up my pace and try to close the gap between us and Sabrina. “What’s he got to be nervous about?”
“What else?” He points to Miranda, who's currently trying to swipe Owen’s hat from off his head and managing to flutter her false lashes at the same time. Eden, on Miranda’s other side, is grinning with outright admiration and egging her on.
“Miranda? She’s obviously really into him. Why would that make him nervous?”
“Because even though he doesn’t show it, I think he cares about her a lot more than she cares about him.”
Startled, I glance over at Nick, and the intense way he searches my face sends butterflies through my stomach. I can’t handle the back and forth way he makes me feel, it’s too complicated. What I need is someone who sees me, who can meet me where I’m at. Like Ellis. I mean, not like Ellis! Ugh, what am I thinking? He doesn’t even look at me that way.
Sticking his hands in his pockets, Nick turns back at Miranda and Owen and I struggle to focus on his face instead of the flour smudged smile that keeps flashing through my brain.
“Miranda falls in love as often as she falls out of it,” Nick explains. Well, I already knew that much. “It’s pretty much an every other month kind of deal, and she may like Owen now, but who knows how long that will last? He’s had a crush on her forever, and I don’t think he wants to be left in the dust when she moves on.”
“Yeah,” I murmur. “I get that feeling.”
“What was that?”
“Nothing!” I fake a grin and scramble for another topic. “Anyway, what’s for lunch?”
Mexican food. Of course, short on gas and with no more room to fit the guys in my car, we end up at the drive thru taco stand in the center of the parking lot. The menu is painted right onto the outside of the building, complete with crossed out options and pricing updates. Still, a line of cars wraps around the lot waiting for their fare, and we have to wait a few minutes ourselves despite the walk-up line being much smaller.
“I’ve got to say, for being a tiny portable in the middle of a shopping center,” I mumble around a mouthful of carne asada once we finally receive our food, “this is freaking awesome.” The thick, homemade tortillas are fresh, the spices incredible, and the guys drench their food with green salsa, indicating their own approval.
“Mm, you should have gotten the horchata. It’s like the best thing in the world!” Sabrina raises her rice-based drink to her face and hugs it gently, leaving a smudged lipstick stain on the side of the styrofoam.
“No way,” Miranda argues. “Sweet tea is life.”
Seated at a concrete picnic table, enjoying the sunlight and company, and paying attention to the way Frank subtlety turns his head towards whoever is talking, my muscles finally relax. The ache in the center of my forehead eases, and the knot in my gut lessens.
“Just wait until Monday,” Sabrina is saying. “We’re going to be seniors!” She sings out the last word, garnishing attention from passing drivers, and laughs around the table. God, I envy her for that. I want a simple senior year.
One by one, we finish our lunch. Owen offers to take Miranda home, Eden begs Nick for a ride over to the corner store, and finally it’s just me and Sabrina again. I let out a huge sigh and appreciate the silence. Nick spent nearly the entire meal making pointed comments about upcoming home games and dances, and between him and Miranda, it’s hard to say who was more interested in getting a date.
“You know, it’s great hanging out with everybody, but I’m going to miss it just being you and me hanging out. It’s quieter just flipping through old books.” I smile and gather my trash, as she sticks her tongue out at me.
“Miss hanging out with just me?” she scowls. “Oh no, girl, I’m going to be at your doorstep every weekend. You’re not shaking me off so easy!”
“Sabrina!”
She laughs, knocking her hip against mine and tossing her garbage into the nearby bin. “Hey what are friends for? But really, there is one last thing I want to do at your house, preferably sometime before we graduate.”
“What’s that?”
She stops by the back end of my car, her puppy dog eyes making me regret my question immediately.
“Can you puh-lease show me your cemetery?”
Chapter Thirteen
“SHE’S NEVER GOING TO stop.” Ellis catches me in the doorway outside my government class, and despite the weather change, it’s so jarring to see him decked out in fall clothing. Everything about him just screams summer, like he belongs out on a lake or opening up the bakery on a hot, lazy morning. Even his eyes remind me of the season, because every time I see them, I’m reminded of the bees humming their way down main street in the beginning of July.
I blink tiredly at him and wish I’d had time to put on some concealer this morning. Delia and I spent another night hunkered down in the secret room hiding from the energy of a vengeful little kid. No sleep, but at least I’m still alive, even if I do feel like death. The closer to October we get, the more frequent the boy’s trespasses become, and nights he isn’t there, I still wake, expecting a shadow figure at my window.
“I know,” I tell him. Moving to the side of the lockers lining the long hallway, I lower my voice and glance around to make sure nobody’s listening. Not that I really need to bother; as expected, half of the school is terrified of the mere sight of me, and the other half hasn’t figured out that I exist. “But what am I supposed to tell her? Hey, remember the ghost my aunt said wasn’t coming back? Yeah, it’s trying to kill me, but no big deal.”
“Well that’s better than not telling her anything at all. What did your aunt say?” My aunt, always my aunt. Ms. Nix is so formal, but I think he’s scared of calling Delia by her first name, no matter how often he drives me home or picks me up for work or school. We’re almost a month into the semester and I think I’ve only driven myself once. If he were anybody else but Ellis, I’d almost think we were dating, or, at least, close to dating.
“She said I needed to let her worry about it and not to go spreading rumors around town. I think she’s scared that the more we talk about it, the more powerful it might become.”
“What? That makes no sense.” He shifts out of the way of oncoming traffic, and scoots into the little nook I’m hiding in. The space is tight, and I bite my lip as his arm brushes against me and he leans his hand on the wall behind my head.
Get ahold of yourself, Addie. Friends stand next to each other all the time. No matter how much time we spend together, or how many times I’ve thought maybe he’ll reach out to hold my hand or hug me goodbye, or something... he never does.
“Actually, it kind of does.”
I swallow and struggle to collect my thoughts. He’s standing so close, and the perfect edges of his lips pull into a smoldering frown that offsets the serious depth to his gaze.
“Uhm,” I stammer. Think ghosts, Addie. Not about how soft his lips must be. “The more attention or fear you give to an unwanted entity the stronger they grow. Kind of like in Mexican culture, how people can stay in the land of the remembered as long as their family honors their memories? Except i
n a way twisted version that causes your worst fears to become even more terrible.”
“Is that why I can’t get you to watch any horror movies with me?” The teasing glint in his eyes somewhat lessens the tension, but my knees are still shaking.
“Kind of?”
“Alright.” He lifts his hand and stands back, squaring his shoulders. Totally calm, completely cool. God, I hope he doesn’t see what a mess I am.
“Well you’ve got to do something about Sabrina. I say we wait until this weekend and go first thing in the morning, when the sun is high.”
“We?” I still haven’t agreed to take Sabrina out to the graveyard, let alone Ellis as well.
“Of course. You’re not going out there alone.” Ellis shakes his head and swings his backpack up over his shoulder. This is exactly the kind of confusing, protective crap that keeps me hoping he’ll see me as something more than just a friend. “Right, I’m off. Got to get to math.” Of course. Because all he feels is the ease of hanging out together. I’m the only one with butterflies.
He leaves me standing in a nearly deserted hallway, sorting through the last few minutes. If he’s serious about spending any time on the property this weekend, then there’s only one thing left to do, and I need to stop letting my stupid crush distract me.
The black box theater is filled with chattering students running lines, and as I walk across the floor, glitter clings to my soles. I finally got a new pair of non-work boots, and instead of flour, they get covered in glitter. That’s it, I’m cursed! Smiling wryly to myself, I stomp over to Eden and wait for her to glance up.
“Hey pretty witch,” she greets me, referencing my shirt. “You know your fashion choice doesn’t help your case any if you’re still trying to keep a low profile. What’s up? Are you finally coming around for another piercing?”
October Darlings Page 15
