by Ashley Kay
Preston arches an eyebrow while I smuggle a laugh in my palm. He takes her hand and pumps it up and down. “Nice to meet you, Lynn.” Glancing at me, his face melts with affection. “As for Savy, I won’t hurt her, I promise.” I strain a smile, my brain screaming at me to just tell him the truth, to get it over with.
Instead, I order us drinks and find a table near the dance floor. Grabbing some food, we chow down, and judging by the noises coming from Preston, he approves. His hand rests on my upper thigh, absentmindedly trailing his fingers along the lace trim, and I can hardly concentrate on my meal.
A tiny body worms his way in between us, jumping up and down to the beat of the music. “Auntie Savy! This music is so cool! Oh, hey, Uncle P, do you want to dance? I can show you how to line dance. I’m pretty good.”
Preston’s face turns fifty shades of pink. His wide eyes say he isn’t sure at all about line dancing, let alone allowing a six-year-old to teach him. I shove his shoulder. “Go on, show us your moves, Uncle P.”
He scowls at me, dropping his fork to his plate, but smiles at Theo when he holds his small hand out for him. Together they stroll to an empty space on the dance floor. Greyson comes up beside me, sitting down, his woodsy cologne forming a cloud around me.
“Oh boy, this is going to be good. Who has the camera on their phone ready?” He rubs his hands together, grinning.
“I do!” Lynn props her phone up against a glass, ready to video the two of them out there.
“He’s going to kill us.” I say in between laughing hysterically at this immense man and tiny kid stepping in line to the beat. Preston follows Theo, trying to mimic his steps, but he was born with two left feet.
Greyson looks over at Lynn. “You have a pleasant flight?”
“Yes, thanks for the plane ride, tickets are outrageous right now.”
“You’re welcome.” His mouth is smiling, but his eyes aren’t. He’s watching the dance floor, but his focus is within. Lifting his glass of water to his mouth, he guzzles down a big gulp. Tapping the empty cup, he peers at me sideways. “Are you ok?”
Pursing my lips, I give a slight shake of my head. “No, I’m not. I need you to talk to him soon. This is killing me.”
“What’s killing you?” Preston comes up behind me, brushing a hand down my shoulder.
Facing him, I grimace. “My shoes. They’re killing me already, can you believe it?” That was close.
He eyes my boots and laughs. I tilt one so Grey can also get a look, smiling as he rolls his eyes.
“Dance with me, Savy. I’ll make you forget all about your feet. You can stand on mine if you need to.” Preston holds out a hand toward me, my heart thrashing wildly as I take it and allow him to pull me close to his chest.
My body double-crosses me, lighting up at the simple touch. He scoops my hair back from my shoulders, runs his hands through it, and then settles his palms on my cheeks. Leaning in, I let him kiss me, his lips gentle and warm, melting my already tender heart.
Grinning against my lips, he breaks away and pulls me to the dance floor. I glance back at Grey—he’s squirming in his seat. The tiny shake of my head quiets his agitation, and I turn my focus back to Preston.
The music switches and an old favorite of mine blares through the speakers. The lights from the Edison bulbs twinkle, and for a moment, I let myself forget.
Squealing, I drag Preston further into the center of the dance floor. “Tell me you remember how to line dance?” I beg, out of breath with excitement.
He grabs my hands, twirling me around like a princess. “Does the waltz count?” he dips me low, my hair skimming the floor, the room tilting at all angles.
Bringing me up and holding me to his chest, I swat him playfully before gripping his shirt tight, trying to gain back some equilibrium. “Smooth, but no, that doesn’t count. Watch me and follow along. My mom and I used to line dance in our living room. Pushed back all the furniture and busted out the old boombox.”
I slide side-to-side, showing him the basics. Eyeing me, he follows my lead, his large feet making a loud thud with each step. My face splits from smiling so hard, and I shove that little voice—hissing fraud—away.
Peeking past Preston’s shoulder to find Lynn, I catch her surveying across the room toward the back of the barn. Following her line of vision, I settle on Isaac, whom is lounging against the lacquered wall, one foot resting on the wood and the other flush to the floor. Fingers casually hooked in his jean pocket, he pulls at a beer with his mouth, giving a new definition to the word lumberjack. Oh boy, I know that look on Lynn’s face—someone’s piqued her interest.
Chuckling and bobbing my head to the music, I turn back to Preston, registering that he isn’t dancing anymore. Raw pain lances across his face, the groove between his eyebrows deepening as he stares back behind me.
“What’s wrong?” I touch his arm, startling when he flinches, his stormy blue eyes looking right through me like I’m made of glass. A word—a name—tumbles from his mouth, slices into my chest, and rips my heart into pieces.
21
PRESTON
SENIOR YEAR- COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY
Friday night. Everyone’s so drunk, the sober ones get tanked simply through osmosis. I wasn’t drinking much, Scarlett and I just had a fight and I’m too annoyed to even enjoy my buzz. Greyson has had enough for the both of us and more than half the guys in the frat house.
Already in the house, he’s weaving and swaying through the throng of scantily clad girls and polo wearing douchebags, using the walls as a crutch. Catching my eye, he spews something about us matching, but I don’t hear the rest over the brain-rattling music being siphoned through the speakers. I wander the house hunting for Scarlett. She’s not answering her phone, it’s likely she can’t hear it.
Our fight was so stupid. We were arguing over where we wanted to spend our honeymoon. She didn’t like my idea, said my tone of voice or some shit was mean, and then left for the party without me. She can irritate the fuck out of me, but I love her more than anything and can’t wait to make her my wife.
Sliding past another stranger holding a red solo cup while slurring lyrics to the song, I push through a storm door, scanning the backyard for her familiar blonde hair. Her friend, Katerina, is hanging by the pool with a drink in one hand, her phone cradled in another.
“Hey Kat! Have you seen Scarlett?” I wave over to her, getting her attention.
She lifts her drink in my direction. “Yeah, she’s in the house. You must have missed her. She’s pretty pissed at you, but I think she’s trying to find you to talk.” She goes back to bobbing her head to the music while her nose buries itself into her phone, the light highlighting her face.
“Ok, thanks, I’ll look again.”
“K, byyyyeee!” She’s definitely wasted, like all the rest, but at least she was useful. I leave her and her equally annoying friends, side-swiping through a bunch of frat brothers crashing through the back door with a squealing girl on their shoulders. They run past the table and chairs, lifting the squawking chick into the air to toss her in the pool.
I shake my head, sneaking in and pass the kitchen island loaded with empty cups on their sides and half empty booze bottles. I don’t see Greyson anymore. He probably found a corner to piss in.
Climbing the stairs, I halt at the top behind what is apparently a line to the bathroom. Leaning over the railing, I glimpse Nico talking with a classmate, clutching a beer, pushing his glasses back up on his nose.
He shifts his stance and sees me. “P, what’s up? Wait, I thought I just saw you go into that back bedroom with Scarlett.” He peers at me closely.
Confusion furrows my brows. What’s he talking about? Then realization strikes me: Greyson.
Storming up the stairs, pushing through people not happy with my bulldozing, I stalk toward the back room, bracing myself for what I might find. My heart pounds out of my chest, and I pause, my hand trembling against the door. Holding my breath, I twist the do
orknob and throw it open.
Scarlett, pulling down her dress, spins around, immediately scrunching up her face while Grey tugs his shirt over his splotchy one. My chest locks up, seizing like a choking car engine, skipping several beats. They say your life flashes before your eyes in moments like this—mine just ended. Rage fills me up, and I lurch toward the two of them.
“What the fuck is going on?” I spit out, eyes pinging between the two of them. Scarlett is still bawling her eyes out—incoherent sentences surging out of her mouth, and Grey has his hands up.
“P, it’s not what you think.” Even he has the decency to hear how ridiculous it sounds.
“I don’t know what else it could be. You’re wasted and just fucked my fiancée!” I roar. Scarlett grabs onto my arms, digging her long nails into my skin, pleading that I listen to her, but I coldly shrug her away—her touch disgusts me.
I launch myself at Greyson, punching him in the jaw. The connection jars through my hand to my elbow, my body too enraged to feel it. His head knocks back, and he falls to the floor, dragging the blanket from the bed with him. Scarlett screams at me to stop, and I flinch.
Wiping my fist on my jeans, I barely notice that Greyson’s blood has smeared down the front, staining them with his disloyalty. “I’m done,” my voice rasps, and before I let her tear-streaked face affect me, I turn away from them and leave.
22
PRESTON
Time stops me in my tracks, flinging me back seven years.
She steps in through the barn doors and out of the past. Her formerly long blonde hair brushes her shoulders, but her lips are painted her signature ruby red. Soft blue eyes scan the room, and a small smile drifts across her porcelain face. My heart sputters, as would anyone’s at seeing a ghost. She can’t be real, it’s a mirage. I’ve woken up in a desert, dehydrated, and conjuring up phantoms.
Scarlett.
In slow motion, Theo runs between legs and swings around tables until he’s in front of her. Jumping into her arms, he clasps his little limbs around her neck before kissing both her cheeks. That ethereal smile blooms across her face as she wiggles her nose against his. Face to face, there’s no denying that he’s hers.
Sucking in a breath, I suffocate on the thick air in the room. The music muffles and my pulse pounds recklessly in my ears. I drag my sweaty palms across my jeans as adrenaline spikes through my system, ready to engage. The urge to bolt is overwhelming, but I force my legs to stay put.
Savy’s voice breaks through. I hear her ask me what’s wrong. I whisper Scarlett’s name, but I can’t be sure, my voice failing me.
Scarlett’s eyes land on me, incredulous, just as surprised.
Swallowing the jagged rock in my throat, I barely register Savy’s fingertips on my hand. Looking down at her, raw fear dilates her pupils. Confused, I open my mouth to ask her what’s going on when Greyson rushes past me in a blur toward Scarlett. My feet drag me after him of their own accord, with no regard for my need to flee the other direction.
I watch as Greyson stops beside her. He’s so familiar with her, his hand on her arm, the other gesturing around, her eyes on his like she’s seen him a hundred times. Rubbing my chest, I reach them in time to hear the tail end of his sentence.
“—I thought I’d be dropping off Theo tomorrow morning, not today, Scar.” Scar.
He cuts off when he sees me—clearing his cluttered throat. “Preston…,” his tongue rejects him, as did my faith in family.
Scarlett’s eyebrows pinch, face paling, her arms clinging to Theo like a lifeline. “Preston,” my name—melodic on her lips—a sound that once stoked fires, now froze me solid. “So it’s true. You’re here.”
She remembers the child in her arms and whispers into his ear. He smiles, untangling himself from her embrace. Straightening his shirt, he darts away.
Spying a full glass of beer behind her, I snake a hand around to snatch the drink, throwing it down my throat like it will quench my thirst for blood.
Wiping my mouth on the back of my hand, I slam down the glass on the table beside me. “Yep, it’s me, in the flesh.” My lips curl up in disgust. I don’t know who I’m angrier at—myself for being so dense, or for the two people in front of me that gouged my heart out—again.
I can’t get them out—the words—they’re stuck in the wasteland of my throat. Clawing at my collar, I loosen up my shirt—the material choking me.
Scarlett’s painted lips turn down. “Are you ok?”
She reaches out to touch me and I back up, my hands out. “Don’t touch me,” it comes out garbled. Swallowing, I squeeze my eyes shut, praying this is a nightmare. “Theo. He’s yours, isn’t he?” The question hangs in the air like brilliant diamonds before shattering to the floor.
Her iridescent eyes grow large, and she places two hands over her mouth. Her expression and her eyes match Theo’s.
A hand lands on my shoulder, and I shove it away before spinning around to face my brother. “When did you plan on telling me?” Anger saturates my words and spittle hits his face.
He flinches, wiping his cheek. “Preston, I … I didn’t know how to tell you or how you’d take it.”
“Like how I took it when I found you in bed with my fiancée.” Laughing, I clutch my stomach and slap my thigh. Right. This is so fucked up.
My head spins. Scarlett, Theo, it’s too much. The years distanced us, but the pain of reality shred every last mile. Grey and I were turning a corner. I opened myself up to the possibility of getting part of my family back, only for them to rip it all away. I need to get out of here. I can’t handle this anymore.
Hands clenched at my sides—my words abrasive, grinding holes in the walls I stacked back up around myself. “Who else knew besides you two?” I shift between Scarlett and Grey. His face pales, eyes moving ever so slightly to behind me.
The key busts the lock wide open. Savy. It explains why she’s been acting strange these last few days. I’m such a fool. I flayed my heart open for her, and she knew this entire time about Theo and Scarlett, feasted on my vulnerability, making me feel when I didn’t want to feel anything at all.
Greyson reads it on my face. Stepping forward, he pleads, “No, P, don’t be upset with her. She didn’t know. I never told her about what happened in college. When you did, she came to me upset, and I came clean with it. I made her promise not to say anything, that I needed to be the one to talk to you. I was waiting for the right time.”
Pinching the skin between my eyebrows, I shake my head. Savy’s off to the side, wringing her hands, the tension rolling off her shoulders in waves as she watches this purgatory unfold.
She knew. She knew and didn’t tell me.
Overwhelmed and needing some air, I stalk off to the back door, flinging it open, startling a few people that are sitting outside at the picnic tables. I head straight to a patch of forest, the music from the party growing subtle until it’s just beats echoing under my feet. I find a tree, lean up against it, losing myself to my thoughts.
My breaths are haggard, my forehead feeling every scrape of the bark dig into my flesh, the skin on my fingers tearing as I grasp the tree hard.
Once again, I find myself alone. The world decided I don’t have a place anymore, that I’m disposable. Poor Preston can’t handle anything thrown his way. Maybe I can’t, maybe I’m just as volatile as everyone seems to think I am. The memories swirl in my head, tangling around every thought I’ve ever had about those important to me. Becoming so knotted, I’m trapped in my own head.
The whisper of feet on the soft ground disturbs the silence behind me, and without turning around, I know who it is. “Savy, go back to the party. I need to be left alone,” I growl, anger coating my words.
She tenderly takes my arm, turning me around to face her. Tears streak her cheeks and the sight stabs me in the chest. I want to hate her. I want to forget her.
“I didn’t know. I swear to you, I didn’t know. Grey never told me, he was too ashamed. I just figure
d Scarlett was someone he met in college. I didn’t know,” she whispers, and it’s caught by the wind that ruffles her hair.
I step back into the tree, eyes on the swirling blades of grass on the ground, the bark a rough reminder of the truth. “We were going to get married. Grey was going to be my best man. It was supposed to be me with Scarlett, her having my babies, not Greyson’s…” I trail off. Savy stiffens beside me but remains silent.
“I came here with the biggest grudge, and I got swept up in Montana. I let my guard down, against my better judgment, and look at what happened. The people I care about the most did what everyone else has done for as long as I can remember. Lie to me, make me feel like I belong, then strip it away. I trusted you. Completely. The thing about trust is, you can give it freely away and hope and pray no one abuses it. My brother did … and now you?” The words lodge in my throat, but I push past it, the raw meat of my mind crumbling. “You need to go, Savy. Now.”
She pleads with me, her words slicing through me, her hands grabbing for mine. “No, we need to talk. You can’t run away from this! Believe me when I say I knew nothing about this until a few days ago.”
Ripping away from her, I claw at my hair. “Yet, you didn’t tell me. Why? Just because Grey said not to? Did you not think about how I’d feel after everything I’ve already had to deal with here?” I scoff, “No, of course not, you couldn’t. Grey’s your friend, but who am I to you, if you couldn’t even be honest with me? Then what? Did you make up that excuse about being overwhelmed so I wouldn’t badger you?”
Tears free fall over her rosy cheeks, her silence ripe with confirmation.
“How do I know this wasn’t a setup from the very beginning? My father coming here, scheming with my brother and you to get his family back to one piece.” Even I know this is farfetched, especially for my father, but I’m not thinking clearly.
