by Regine Abel
With these last words, he turned around and headed for the door.
“You may kick me from your city, and forbid me access to your temple, but nothing and no one will ever keep me away from my mate,” I said in a tone that brooked no argument.
Frollo stopped and looked at me over his shoulder. “Do what you must, and so will I. Just see that you do not set foot again in the temple.”
I do not know how long I stood staring at the door after it closed behind him. A single thought replayed in my mind: please, let Esmeralda be all right.
Chapter 14
Esmeralda
I woke up with a start, feeling observed. My head jerked right, and I gasped in shock at the sight of Frollo, sitting in a chair a few meters away from me. His blue eyes looked almost dark as he stared at me with an angry scowl. Pressing my palm to my chest to contain the erratic beating of my heart, I glared at him in outrage that he should trespass the privacy of my room.
And then I noticed the syringe case resting on his lap.
Swallowing hard, my gaze flicked back to his. As my lying down position made me feel too vulnerable, I sat up at the edge of my bed and folded around me the panels of the black sarong I was still wearing. Gone were the seductive looks, smoldering glances, respectful gazes, and open admiration the Praetor had previously showered me with. The blue depths of his eyes burned with a hard mix of anger and contempt. One could almost say hatred.
Was he truly such a sore loser?
“You’ve been busy,” Frollo said at last with an icy voice.
“I merely did what someone else wouldn’t,” I said, lifting my chin in defiance.
“Oh, we both know you did far more than that, little Vestal,” he retorted with contempt. “But then, are you even a Vestal anymore?”
I recoiled, taken aback by the unexpected comment. “What is that supposed to mean?”
He gave me a slow once over as if examining an odd, alien creature. “Your Light is gone. A rock by the roadside would emit a thousand times more ergokinetic energy than you do,” he said bitterly. “You shone with the brightness of the sun. The gods of the Elysium were willing to lay their hearts at your feet. And you threw it all away for the cock of a Fallen.”
I gasped in outrage at such rudeness.
“First off, you have no say in my relationship with Kwazeem. And second, you do not get to judge anyone the way you’ve been whoring around with the Maidens,” I snapped in response to his crude words. “My Light isn’t gone. I merely overexerted myself at the Festival. It’s called a burn out; a very common reaction amongst newly ordained Vestals upon their first Festival.”
Even as I spoke those words, a cold shiver ran down my spine. I knew of the burn out but had never experienced it myself—until now. Old Nan’s words had been replaying in my head non-stop since I’d awakened in Kwazeem’s bed feeling completely exhausted, and my powers muted.
“I am well aware of the burn out. You seem to forget that I’ve been Praetor of the greatest city in the Nine Circles for more than a decade,” Frollo said, adjusting the case on his lap as he leaned back in the chair. “Many of your sisters have come and gone, each one too weak to fill the Well. All of them burnt out and did so right at the Well during their Chant. You completed the ceremonial, then sat and enjoyed dinner for two hours with us before getting escorted back to your room. You then snuck out to Kwazeem’s cabin, drained him, and then fucked him all night. So no, Esmeralda, you did not burn out.”
“That’s enough from you,” I shouted, jumping to my feet. Beyond the crass rudeness, his words terrified me far more than I dared admit to myself. “I do not need your approval for anything, and I will not tolerate you trashing my relationship with my man. I do not believe my Light has faded. Last night wasn’t my first time being close with Kwazeem. Every time we’ve been together, he’s enhanced my power. Do you really think I did all this on my own at the Festival?”
Frollo narrowed his eyes at me but kept silent.
“This is a burn out and nothing more. I was far too infused with power from my link with Kwazeem and the Elohim’s aura to collapse the day of the Festival,” I argued, trying to convince myself as much as him. “As long as I remained close to Kwazeem, I felt strong, fueled by our bond. It’s only once he left to hunt, and when I came back here that I faltered.”
The dubious look in his eyes pissed me off, especially considering my legs were getting wobbly beneath me from trying to stand in a menacing stance before him.
“And if my Light has actually died, then so be it,” I continued defiantly. “Kwazeem is my soulmate. All those years of training were so that I would come here to find him. I regret nothing. Whatever the cost, I will bear it gladly to be with him.”
Frollo snorted and, standing up, he looked at me with disdain. “Such pretty sentiments, but oh so useless,” he mocked. “You have two days to recover from this ‘burn out’ or be gone from here. If you are unable to perform the Chakra Ceremony, you will leave a holographic message with whatever bullshit apology you wish to spiel, and be gone not just from Paris, but from Eden itself. Hide in whatever Circle you wish, but you’d be wiser seeking an ally planet instead.”
“You cannot force me to leave the planet,” I challenged, feeling increasingly dizzy. “You may kick me out of Paris, but—”
“Do you have any idea what will happen if anyone discovers that you are ruined?” Frollo yelled, shedding his cold and controlled exterior.
I recoiled and stumbled back onto the bed, gaping at him wide-eyed. Despite the shock, I welcomed being off my feet.
“Wake up, little girl! The last time this happened, it started a bloody war which caused the Fall. If the Elohim and the people find out another Anointed has been ruined, it will be open season on the Fallen. It will be a massacre. And I can promise you that there will be heavy casualties on both sides. So, yes, your skinny ass will get the fuck off my planet if your power doesn’t come back.”
I could feel the blood drain from my face for not having properly considered the consequences. Sure, people would be upset, but I couldn’t be responsible for a witch hunt that would cause the deaths of hundreds of innocents. Defeated, I cast my eyes down, which seemed to calm him somewhat. He went on about how he’d forbidden Kwazeem to seek me out until we knew for sure if I was ‘ruined’ as he so eloquently put it. I didn’t bother arguing or challenging him about it.
Whatever the outcome, I wouldn’t part from my mate. With Vesta’s blessing, I would perform the Chakra Ceremony in two days to eliminate any risk of unjust retaliation against the Fallen, bid my farewell to Paris, and then leave this planet with Kwazeem.
His speech done, Frollo turned around to leave.
“You don’t need that case anymore,” I called out as he reached for the door.
He looked down at the case held in his right hand before glancing at me over his shoulder. “Maybe, maybe not. Time will tell.”
“I know what you’ve been up to,” I said with contempt. “Bringing Kwazeem to the temple was never about protecting him, but to make it easier for you to exploit him. You’ve injected yourself with his Divine Light to become the most powerful ergokinetic human male.”
Frollo snorted then turned around to face me. The undisguised admiration in his eyes as he gave me a slow once over took me by surprise. I’d expected a strong denial and self-righteous indignation.
“You’re not so stupid after all. Such a waste,” the Praetor said wistfully.
“You’re not even going to deny it?” I asked, flabbergasted.
“Why would I?” he asked with a dismissive shrug. “He had something I wanted, and I could give him something he needed; a fair exchange. His Light helped me secure the highest position for a human on this planet, which in turn allowed me to give him as good and safe a life as his nature allowed.”
“And what will you do once he’s gone? When his Light fades from your system, people will realize you’re not so powerful after all,” I challenged.
Once again, he shrugged off my comment. “I have nothing else to prove and no one else to impress. I own Paris. In truth, I haven’t used his Light in a long time except the day after your arrival. I did it to impress you because, unlike the previous Vestals, you hadn’t rushed to my bed that first night to scratch that itch.” Frollo took another step towards me, this time undressing me with a lecherous gaze that made me feel dirty. “That first morning when we had breakfast together, it had made you so hot and bothered for me that I could have fucked you right there on the dining room floor in front of the cook, and you would have begged me for more. If I’d known how you were going to throw away your future, I would have.”
“You don’t strike me as someone to deny yourself what you want. So, why didn’t you?” I asked, my cheeks burning with humiliation at how wild with lust I’d indeed been that day because of Kwazeem’s Light oozing out of Frollo.
“You don’t publicly bend over the woman you intend to marry,” he retorted. “But, maybe if I had, we wouldn’t be in this mess.”
Without another word, he turned on his heel and left my room, the case still clasped in his hand.
I woke up to the prickly feel of sharp claws hugging my face, and a small, hard little mouth kissing my cheek.
“Victus,” I whispered, instantly guessing the identity of my tiny visitor.
Picking him up with both hands, I kissed his scaly forehead as I sat up in my bed. He beamed at me with his sharp, pointy teeth, then gestured towards my nightstand. On it, lay a beautiful bracelet with a stylized fire wasp on it, the symbol of the Fourth Circle—the moon I’d been born on. I marveled at the delicate and intricate work, enhanced by finely chiseled glowstones forming the shape of the wasp. I immediately realized Kwazeem must have started working on it the day we had our picnic when I’d told him about my homeworld.
My heart further melted for my mate. Getting out of bed, I hurried to the bathroom to wash the sleep from my face. To my relief, the weariness that had bogged me down all day yesterday appeared to have lifted at last. Fixing myself under the curious eyes of the imp felt a little awkward. We didn’t have pets at the temple on Obscura, and this little guy didn’t quite qualify as such either. Call me paranoid, but he seemed to enjoy the view a tad too much for my liking.
Once dressed, I settled at my desk to record a message for Kwazeem on a holocard. Victus made a nuisance of himself throughout the process, constantly poking his face in front of the camera, cuddling against my neck, and kissing my cheek. It was beyond adorable. However, that didn’t keep me from getting the task done. As much as I ached to be with my man right this instant, we needed to play it safe and not needlessly provoke Frollo.
Despite everything, I didn’t think the Praetor wished us ill, but he wouldn’t go down for us. I put the holocard in a little pouch and gave it to Victus.
“Take this to Kwazeem. I’ll see you all again either tomorrow night, or the day after the Chakra Ceremony,” I said, carrying the imp to my window before kissing his little forehead between his horns. “Be careful and don’t get caught.”
Victus chirped, kissed my chin, and took flight after carefully looking outside for prying eyes.
The day dragged on interminably. In between failed attempts at summoning my Divine Light, I made sure to be seen by the locals, looking happy and healthy walking around the plaza and a few busy streets of Paris. Guilt gnawed at me as the people hailed me like a goddess as I passed them by. The atmosphere in the city was electric, no pun intended. Since the use of any type of nuclear or fossil fuel had been banned on most planets of our solar system, energy had become an even more precious resource. This made Vestals, especially high-ranking ones, national treasures that every Circle fought over. Now that I’d been here on Eden, I understood the extent of the First Circle’s needs. They would be devastated. Their fury to have been given such hope of a brighter future only two days ago and have it already ripped away from them was inevitable.
I wanted to be their Vestal. I would without hesitation, but not at the cost of a life with Kwazeem. If only I could make them accept him...
Assuming your powers come back, and that he isn’t indeed draining you.
Dwelling over such depressing thoughts was moot, though. However terrified I felt at the thought that I may no longer be a Vestal, there was nothing I could do about it but wait and see. To my shame, I had to admit that my bigger fear was that, should I indeed be ‘ruined,’ with time, I might grow to resent Kwazeem for it. He hadn’t known the risks, but I had. Old Nan had warned me, but I’d stubbornly denied that possibility because how could the man I love be bad for me?
I returned to the temple to do a bit more research on which Circle might be most accepting of a human-Fallen couple, and then what other nearby planets might welcome us. For a brief instant, I considered approaching the Fallen tribes, first here on Eden, or maybe on one of the surrounding moons. Speaking to Old Nan, it had sounded like Kwazeem’s mother had only been isolated for her child’s sake and not because they’d rejected a hybrid. Now that he was an adult, would he still be so vulnerable to the Fallen’s presence?
In the following hours, I put together an extensive list of questions to validate, and possible new places for us to call home. Thankfully, despite the embarrassment and maybe even shame that could befall my family once I’d left, the Temple of Vesta couldn’t take back the dowries it had paid to them. Since I couldn’t pack much of my belongings yet as it might raise the cleaning lady’s suspicion, I spent the rest of the evening iterating on my farewell holographic message.
That night, I went to bed mentally exhausted but physically too tense to relax. Nevertheless, I managed to fall into a fitful slumber. Morning found me with a headache and a large gaping void inside me where my Divine Light had once been burning bright. This time, it finally sank in. I hadn’t burnt out. I’d been stripped of my Light, of the tremendous blessing Vesta had bestowed upon me, making me unique, powerful, the light in the darkness that constantly threatened to engulf her children.
I was no longer a Vestal.
A first tear trickled down my cheek, soon followed by a second, then a third. A strangled cry escaped me before the dam burst open. I bawled helplessly, my body wracked with violent sobs as I mourned the loss of everything I’d ever been. My Vestal status had defined me as a person and shaped my entire life. Who was I now? What was I? Would Kwazeem even still want me anymore? My Light had drawn him just like his had drawn me. Would he still be attracted to what was left of me?
I don’t know how long I remained prostrate on my bed, my wailing having abated to a weak whimper interspersed with sniffling. A single hard knock on my door startled me. Without waiting for an invitation to come in, the intruder bypassed the lock and opened the door. I didn’t need to ask who it was. Lifting my head, I looked at Frollo standing in the doorway. He held a stunning white staff in his hand that I instantly recognized as Kwazeem’s work.
One look at my face drenched in tears sufficed for Frollo to get the answer he’d no doubt come seeking. A strange mix of pity, contempt, and anger flashed over his noble features. That cut deep and reopened the floodgates.
“Ever the optimist, Kwazeem gave me this as a gift for you to use in tomorrow’s Chakra Ceremony,” he said, showing me the staff before leaning it again the wall inside my room. “I told him you wouldn’t get to use it,” he added with a heavy dose of sarcasm. His gaze roamed around the room before once more settling on me. “Pack your things. Only bring the indispensable. The rest will be forwarded to you at a later date. I want you gone before noon,” the Praetor said in a cold and emotionless voice. “My personal guards will meet you outside to fly you out. Do not forget to leave your holographic message in the Great Hall.”
He pushed in the hovercart of food Malina had left outside my room, then left, closing the door behind him. Wiping my face with the back of my hands, I forced myself out of bed and gathered what few items I wanted to keep or might need on the new jou
rney lying ahead. The sight of the trunk which had contained my ceremonial dresses triggered another wave of tears.
It felt too unfair, too steep a price to pay to be with the man I loved. Had following the desires of my heart been worth such a loss? As the question popped in my head, Kwazeem beautiful face appeared in my mind’s eye, and a strange sense of peace settled over me.
Yes. A thousand times yes.
I wiped my face almost angrily with the back of my hand before completing my packing with renewed purpose. Any future without Kwazeem would be meaningless for me. So it was time to stop wailing over spilled milk. What was done was done. In time, I would recover from the loss of my Divine Light, but I could never recover from losing my soulmate.
After piling by the door the items I intended to keep, I finally gave into curiosity and picked up the staff. It was beyond exquisite. The white wood polished to look almost like ivory. Solid and well balanced, the intricate, woven patterns of the wood at each end of the staff were truly the work of a master artisan. Small glow stones had been embedded in a slanted circle around the staff near both ends. Covering the pattern with my hand, I gave it a twist and, as suspected, a sharp blade appear at the matching end of the staff.
But this was no regular blade.
Looking at it up-close, I marveled at the glowing veins streaking the dark metal. They appeared to writhe and heave like a living thing.
Divine Light. Kwazeem’s Divine Light.
How in the world had he managed to infuse the metal with his very essence?
The sound of the trumpets resounding in the distance startled me, snapping me out of my mesmerized daze. As they continued to sound outside, it took me a moment to figure out they didn’t come from the public entertainers that often cheered the crowd on the plaza. And then my stomach dropped at the realization they were heralding the Elohim.
