by Ella Miles
I need to remember where I hid the box. I need to find it and destroy it. That way, there is no reason for anyone to ever come after us again. After this is over, we will move the country and learn to raise sheep or something. We will leave this world. But first, we have to find a way to win.
I look at Langston. “How do we do this?”
He looks at me cautiously, afraid to rush me. Maybe today should just be about resting and trying to not worry, but I can’t wait. I need something to do, and the sooner we figure out my memories, the sooner this can end. If I’m safe, Langston wouldn’t have to watch over me. He could go help Zeke kill Julian and his men.
“Trauma can take away the memories, but it can also trigger them,” Langston finally says with a serious tone.
I straighten my shoulders, standing as tall as I can. I’m not going to be defeated. I’m going to fight. I’m going to ensure my husband returns and has a family to return to.
“Then, trauma is where we will start.”
17
Zeke
I step out of the doorway of Siren’s bedroom, and immediately the tears start.
I asked Langston to cut off his finger to show how much he would protect Siren. Walking away from her feels worse than that. It feels like I’ve lost an entire limb.
I know in my gut that it’s the right thing to do. I know I need to leave her to protect her, but each step I take away from her still kills me.
My only comfort is that I finally believe that Langston will protect her with his life. It’s not just because of all the things I’ve watched him do these last few days, nor because he was willing to cut off a finger for her. But because of the water tearing up in his eyes, watching me and Siren say goodbye.
Langston knows how important Siren is to me. He finally gets it. He witnessed it. I have no doubt that he will do anything to protect her.
Two men are waiting on the pier.
“You must be Zeke,” the man says, extending his hand to me.
I shake it. “Yes.”
“I’m Donovan. And this is Pedro.”
I shake the other man’s hand.
“We better get going, we have a flight to catch to Belize.”
I nod and follow the men to the waiting blacked-out SUV. On the ride to the airport, we discuss strategy for how we should all behave when we meet with Julian, which keeps my brain occupied. But on the flight over, there is nothing to do but think of Siren and the life we will eventually have.
That is until the end of the flight. Donovan comes back to my seat on the private jet we chartered.
“Ready for this?”
I nod and grip the armrests to keep from reacting.
He punches me, twice in the face. Once in the stomach.
“Thanks, Donovan,” I say.
He nods and then takes his seat again.
I add a couple of small rips to my shirt. The masquerade is complete. I looked like I’ve been through a fight, and they captured me.
Finally, we land, and I have something to focus on again other than my sorrow.
Pedro slaps some handcuffs onto my wrists that I’m more than capable of getting out of. Then he leads me to a waiting SUV to drive us the short ten-minute drive to where Julian is.
Once Pedro stops the car, Donovan takes his gun and points it at me.
“You ready?” he asks.
“Yes.”
Pedro steps out of the driver’s seat, drawing his gun as he opens my door and then pulls me out by the arm. Donovan steps out behind me and grabs my other arm. They both keep their guns trained on me as we walk into the soccer field and wait for Julian to show up.
A moment later, another blacked-out car pulls up. To my surprise, Julian climbs out of the driver’s seat. I don’t see anyone with him.
He pulls off his sunglasses as he walks over to us.
“Here’s the down payment you can give to your boss, good faith money that we will split the profits we make from the sales of the vials fifty-fifty,” Julian says before tossing the bag at our feet.
Donovan picks it up and unzips it. He flicks through the money quickly, all for show.
Then he pushes me forward. “He’s yours to deal with now.”
Donovan and Pedro head back to the car, and I hear the spit of the gravel as they drive off. Julian and I are left to stare at each other.
We both know I could run and break free easily, so I expect Julian to draw his gun to try and control me. Then again, that’s not really his style.
Instead, Julian walks to me and grabs the handcuffs around my wrists. He pops them open with his hands.
I frown, not understanding what he is doing.
“You saw Siren was with Bishop?” Julian asks me.
“Yes.”
He grins. “Well, now we have our answer. Bishop is on my side, not yours.”
I growl. “Tell me why I’m here, or I’m leaving. We both know those handcuffs were the only way you were going to defeat me. And now that you released me, you have no chance.”
Julian laughs. “Now that you know that Bishop has Siren, I don’t need handcuffs to control you. You tried going after her, but from the looks of you, you clearly lost. Bishop still has Siren. The only way you are getting her back alive is if you help me. If you run or kill me, Bishop has been ordered to kill Siren.”
I shove Julian hard against his car door.
“You bastard. Don’t ever threaten my wife’s life.”
“Help me get the box. I know you know where it is. Lucy gave it to you to hide. Tell me where it is. Help me get it back, and I won’t kill Siren.”
I release him.
“If Bishop so much as lays a finger on her, I’ll make you wish you were dead.”
“If he so much as lays a finger on her without my permission, I’ll be the one making him wish he were dead.” Julian turns and opens the driver’s door. He doesn’t pat me down. He doesn’t check to see what weapons I have on me. He just climbs inside the car, knowing I will join him.
And I do. I round the car and climb into the seat next to him.
“Where to?” Julian asks, testing me.
I frown, even though inside I’m smiling. This is exactly what I wanted. I know precisely where we are going—Kai and Enzo and their team are waiting to ambush us. They will torture Julian for information about his financier, while I’ll break into his phone and find out that way. We have it all planned out. It will work.
“Alaska,” I say.
“Clean yourself up.” Julian tosses me a towel and first aid kit. And then he starts driving.
18
Siren
Langston drives me through the countryside toward his house in his convertible, with me in the passenger seat. We’re headed to the same house where he held me after being captured.
Langston looks over at me. Even with his sunglasses on, I can tell by the set of his jaw and intensity flowing off him that he’s nervous.
“Just tell me, Langston. After everything we’ve been through, I don’t think anything you need to say should make you nervous.”
He pauses then says, “I should warn you.”
“About what?”
“You might be triggered when you arrive at the house. Last time you stayed with me, I did everything I could to make it the worst experience possible without actually hurting you in any long-lasting way. I didn’t beat you. I didn’t rape you. But it will still jog haunting memories most likely.”
I sip on my Sprite as I gaze at the countryside, taking in what he said.
“Why do you think, when Julian raped me, it didn’t trigger my memories? I had nightmares, but I still didn’t remember the thing I’m desperate to remember.”
“I’m nervous about that too. It should have.”
“What is your theory on why it didn’t?”
“It wasn’t traumatic enough. As horrible as it was, it still wasn’t on the same plane as you killing your own parents, as you burying a secret so deep in your brain an
d locking it away. It’s going to take something big to unlock it.”
Langston grabs my shoulder and squeezes it. “I’ll be by your side the whole way. And if you would rather wait for Zeke to get back to be here with you, then we can.”
I shake my head. “No. If I have to relive any trauma, it will be too hard for Zeke to bare.”
“Probably,” Langston agrees.
“What trauma did you live through that you were hoping to forget?” I ask, hoping that we have been friends long enough that he will tell me.
He never gives me an answer. Instead, he nods forward.
I turn and get my first glance at the place I once thought was a place of torture, but now realize was the first place for my healing.
I wait for the daydreams to haunt me, but they don’t come, which almost makes it worse.
We both step out of the car, and Langston opens the door, drawing his gun.
“It’s just a precaution. The security system is still up and running, but I want to be extra careful.”
I nod and follow Langston in, using him like a bodyguard. He leads me to the security room, where he double checks the system and then tells me it’s safe.
Only then do I explore the house a moment on my own, before Langston shows me to my bedroom next to his.
I sit on the edge of the bed. Even though today has been long, and I’ve had to deal with a lot, sleep won’t be coming for a long time, so I might as well get to work.
“What have you tried before to get me to remember? My memory of my time here is wrong,” I say.
“We don’t have to start today. There is a tub in the bathroom. Why don’t you take a long bath, read a book, and relax tonight?”
“No, I don’t want to rest. I want to do something, try something.”
If I were speaking to Zeke, he would be fighting back and ordering me around. Langston is different, though. He doesn’t bark orders. But then he understands what I’ve been through. He knows the pain I’ve faced. And he, like me, wants to do something to fix this as soon as possible.
Langston sits on the edge of the bed next to me.
“I tried withholding food, putting you in a cell where you thought others were being tortured next to you, shock therapy, and drugs. I tried making you hate me, making myself into a monster that you could fight, but all it gave us were flickers of your memories. None of them were even related to the one memory we are trying to remember.”
“I wish I could just make myself remember. Zeke seems to think if I give it enough time, I’ll remember.”
“I wish I had an easier way to help you. I’ve talked to all the experts, done all the research myself. The best way to remember is through a traumatic experience, something that triggers your memory.
“Although, I don’t want to try any of the methods I tried before. It was one thing when you were healthy to push the limits of bringing you into a traumatic experience. It’s another thing now that you are pregnant.”
“So, what do you suggest we try first?”
“First, we should try the gentlest method we can.”
“Which is?”
“Hypnosis. We’d bring you back to the night you met Zeke and I. Your mind may allow you to remember that happy moment, then maybe you’ll remember the rest.”
I nod several times. “I think that’s a good idea. If for no other reason than I would love to remember the first time I laid eyes on Zeke. I would love to know if it was love at first sight or not.”
“Well, it was on one side.” Langston winks at me. Then he stands and holds out his hand to help me up.
I take his hand, and he helps me stand.
“Find a spot in the house where you feel calm and relaxed. I’ll get my phone and play some music that will help with the hypnosis.”
“Thank you, Langston.”
“Don’t thank me. I have no idea if this will work.”
I shake my head. “Thank you for ensuring my safety.” I put my hand on my stomach. “Our safety.”
“Come on,” he says, but I see a hint of pink cross his cheeks.
I follow him out of my bedroom, and we walk through the house to a library with gorgeous floor-to-ceiling windows.
“Will this work?” He asks me.
I nod, feeling very safe in this relaxing room.
Langston sits in the middle of the floor, so I mirror him by sitting across from him.
“Close your eyes and clear your mind,” Langston says.
I do as he starts playing soft music on his phone.
I try to calm myself as I listen to the soothing music.
“Take slow, deep breaths,” Langston says.
I try to slow my breathing.
“In.”
I do through my nose.
“And out.”
I exhale through my mouth.
His voice is calming, similar to Zeke’s.
“You are safe,” Langston says.
I am safe.
“Relax into your breath.”
I do.
“Now think back to the first time you met Zeke. What was he doing?”
I take a deep breath and don’t let the memory of finding Zeke in the ocean fill my brain. Instead, I leave my mind blank, trying to let the images come to me.
I know who my targets are. Two men, boys really, similar in age to me. They work for the younger Black. They know how to access the vault. They all have access. They all have keycards and fingerprint access. The fingerprint is easy. Just get one of the many drinks they are holding and slip it into my purse. But the keycard will take more finagling.
When I step foot inside the bar where the two boys are drinking, I assume the bar will be crowded, and I won’t be able to spot them easily. To my surprise, it’s very easy, even though the bar is crowded, because there are only two men in the entire bar.
I thought I would have to work to figure out who they were. All I had to go by are their names—Langston and Zeke—and that they frequent this bar. I wasn’t expecting that my main competition would be twenty other females all vying for their attention.
It’s like they are royalty the way the women are treating them.
They are seated in a corner booth of the bar with four women around them. The rest of the women flirt or dance from afar, hoping to be summoned.
I roll my eyes as I walk to the bar and try to form a plan. I can’t see the two men through the crowds of women very clearly, so I won’t be able to study them from afar. I need a plan to get close.
“What can I get you?” a male bartender asks me.
“The most expensive scotch you have,” I answer.
“Are you buying the guys a drink?”
“No, it’s for myself.”
The bartender nods at me with an impressed look.
“Can I get a credit card to open a tab for you?”
I smirk. “Who says I’ll be the one buying?”
He shakes his head. “Good luck to you.”
I cross my legs and watch his eyes drop to my exposed thighs. I know how to seduce like it’s my job, which it is quickly becoming. I seduce men to get what I want. Or, more often, what my parents want.
“I don’t need luck,” I say when his eyes finally reach my face again after raking over every inch of my body. I may be wearing a dress like every other woman here, but no other woman knows how to use her curves like I do.
The bartender gapes. “You’re right; you don’t need luck. I’ll put it on their tab.”
I smile and wait for my drink before I make my move. The bartender ignores everyone else waiting and pours my drink first.
“Thanks,” I say, lifting the glass as I make my way around the crowded bar. There are many seats left, which will make my ploy work even better.
There is one empty seat left at the guys’ booth; they just don’t realize it’s empty.
I walk over like a whirlwind and drop onto one of the boys’ lap.
“Excuse me? What do you think you are doing?�
� he asks.
“Sitting, there are no chairs open. This was the only spot I could find.”
I turn my head to get a good look at the kid whose lap I’m sitting on, and my jaw drops.
This boy is all man. I was expecting a kid; instead, I got a beast. He has long dark hair, a scruffy face, dreamy eyes, and muscles for days. If he wasn’t my target, I’d be head over heels in love with him right now. I can feel how fast my heart is beating, and it takes me a minute to adjust. All I know is I’m going to love using this man tonight.
“Siren? Siren, are you okay?” Langston’s voice says.
I blink rapidly, looking at Langston. “I remember.”
“You remember where you hid the box?”
“No, I remember meeting you and Zeke the first time.” I gasp as I stand up abruptly from the ground. My head is light, and I’m dizzy as I try to process everything.
Langston grabs my elbow, keeping me steady and on my feet.
“Thanks,” I mumble.
“Sit down and let me make you some tea, then you can tell me what happened.”
I let Langston lead me to a large sofa, and I sit. Langston studies me closely for a second before leaving me alone.
I’ve met Zeke and Langston before. I can’t believe it. I can’t believe I have memories that I can’t remember.
“Here, drink this.” Langston hands me a cup of tea. I take it and sip it all down quickly, even though it’s hot and burns my throat.
Langston sits next to me, takes my cup from me, pours more hot water in, and returns it to me, saying, “Slowly this time.”
His eyes give me a warning to drink slowly, so I take a sip.
“What did you remember?”
“I remember coming to the bar. I remember sitting on Zeke’s lap.” I blush and look at Langston. “I remember falling for Zeke instantly.”
Langston smiles back at me and leans back, drinking his own tea.
I raise an eyebrow. “You know drinking tea isn’t the manliest thing you could be doing. You could drink alcohol if you want, I don’t mind.”
