by Ember Dante
I cleaned the entire apartment before Jules got home, and even cooked dinner. My nerves were strung so tight I lit into her when she told me about her conversation with Ian that morning before he left. She was unapologetic about the things she said, and while I understood they came from a good place, I was so pissed I refused to speak to her for the rest of the evening, opting instead for a long soak in a hot bath. Slipping into clean sheets would have felt spectacular, but I hated to admit that I couldn’t bring myself to change them. I could still smell Ian on them, and I wasn’t ready to wash him away. I couldn’t even concentrate on the book in my hands, the newest Sylvia Day. I’d read the same damn paragraph five times, and I still didn’t know what it said. Ugh. I’d turned into one of those women.
Frustrated beyond belief, I contemplated taking one of Jules’ sleeping pills when the phone rang. All of my tension drained away when I saw Ian’s name on the screen. I needed serious help. I took a deep breath and exhaled before answering.
“Hi.” I didn’t want to sound too eager, of course.
His voice was smooth and warm, like aural sex. “Hey, Beautiful.”
“Thank you for the flowers. I wanted to call when they were delivered, but I didn’t want to disturb you.”
“You’re welcome, baby. Call me anytime you want. This isn’t too late, is it? I was worried you might be in bed.”
“Well, I am in bed, but I was lying here thinking about you,” I teased.
“Damn, you don’t play fair,” he groaned.
“Speaking of not playing fair, I missed saying goodbye this morning,” I grumbled.
“I know. I’m sorry about that. I hated to wake you since I kept you up so late last night.”
“Hmm, and here I thought I kept you up,” I murmured.
“Yeah. That you did.” He laughed.
“How was your day?”
“Busy. I considered driving home tonight, but I’m just too tired.”
“Should I let you go so you can get some sleep?”
“No. I want to talk to you. Your voice relaxes me.”
Tyler thought the flowers scored points, but that comment put Ian well over the mark. “I owe you an apology.”
“For what?”
“You know what. I’m referring to the conversation with Jules this morning.” Just thinking about it pissed me off all over again.
“Don’t worry about that. She’s just looking out for you.”
“Well, I jumped in her shit for it. She shouldn’t have approached you like that.”
“It’s no big deal, really.” He chuckled. “In fact, I intend to have a similar conversation with Finn’s new boyfriend as soon as I have the chance.”
“When did you meet him? What’s he like?”
“Last night. Funny thing, he went to high school with us. He’s a nice guy, good-looking. Finn seems to be quite taken with him.”
“Good-looking?” I teased.
“Yeah. If I were gay, I’d do him.”
“Oh, my gosh. That’s hilarious. I guess your brother has good taste then?”
“I’d say we both have good taste.”
The words and the tone in which they were spoken sent sparks shooting through me. “That’s a good answer.”
“I’m just telling you the truth.”
“I like your truth.”
“So do I.”
We fell silent a few moments before I cleared my throat. “The card was sweet.”
“Sweet, huh?” He laughed.
“Yep. Saying things like that will guarantee you get lucky.”
He laughed again. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
I paused, unsure of how to say what was on my mind. “I have a small confession to make.”
“What, babe?”
“I may have misled you about the reason I wouldn’t give you my number when we met. I mean, what I told you was true, but I didn’t tell you everything.”
“It doesn’t matter. I assumed you have your reasons and you’d tell me when you were ready.”
I took a deep breath and plunged forward.
“I met my ex-boyfriend, Brett, my senior year in college and we dated for three years. Last year we planned a trip to Corpus for Fourth of July weekend. He was notorious for running late, so I went over to his place to help him finish packing. I had a key and just let myself in.” I released a rough exhale that came out as more of a sigh. “I caught him in bed with some skank he worked with. Afterward, I found out that it had been going on for quite some time. She wasn’t the only one, either. I never saw it while we were together, but in hindsight, the signs were there.”
Silence lengthened between us as we listened to each other breathe. It may have been my imagination, but his respiration increased as if he was agitated.
“He was ... emotionally abusive, and I was stupid, I guess. I allowed it. My friends kept trying to tell me how controlling he was, but I wouldn’t listen. I thought I was in love,” I lamented, “so I made excuses for him and distanced myself from my friends. Catching him with Samantha was my wake up call, and it really messed me up. Since then, I haven’t allowed myself to get close to anyone. That’s what I meant when I said I was being unfair to you by not giving you a chance. I was blaming you for his actions.”
“Did he ever hit you?”
His question seemed nonchalant, but I could hear the anger underneath his words. I didn’t respond, which was an answer in itself. I was ashamed that I hadn’t left him the first time it happened. I could only imagine what Ian thought of me.
“He’s a fucking asshole and deserves—” He cut himself off with a sharp inhale that morphed into a growl. Several deep breaths later, he continued in a calmer tone. “I’m glad you told me. Thank you for trusting me.” He paused again, and his voice sounded much lighter when he continued. “I suppose I should thank him for cheating on you. If he hadn’t fucked things up, I might have never met you.”
“There you go, saying sweet things again.” I laughed, grateful at his attempt at levity.
“Oh, no, baby. That was entirely self-serving.”
“You should probably thank Jules and Tyler, too. They’ve been your biggest champions.”
“Oh really? Well, I guess I should send them both flowers,” he joked.
“I think they would be happier with booze.” I giggled. “Why don’t you join us Friday for our weekly happy hour?”
“Wait—are you asking me out on a date?”
“Yes. Women can do that nowadays, you know.”
“Hmph. I don’t know. A date has certain implications.”
Oh, he was quick. Game on. “I’m not implying anything. I’m straight up saying I’d like for you to join us. Then I want you to take me home and fuck me until I forget my own name.”
“Fucking hell,” he groaned. “You’re killing me, babe, saying shit like that when I’m two hundred miles away from you.”
I was starting to get better at flirting. “Aw, is Mr. Wiggly waking up?”
“Mr. Wiggly?” he guffawed.
“What? Don’t guys nickname their penis?”
“I guess. Can’t say I’d ever think of Mr. Wiggly.”
“I figured you’d like that better than Little Ian considering it’s really not little.”
“Holy shit. This conversation just went south. And to answer your original question, yes, I am fucking hard as a rock. Even after the Mr. Wiggly comment.”
“So what name did you give yours?”
“You’re not going to let this go, are you?”
“No, because now I have to know. What did you name your penis? Excalibur? Thor’s Hammer? Stanley?”
“Hmm. Never thought of Excalibur. I like it.” He paused. “But Stanley?”
“Yeah, you know—the power drill.” I had a hard time getting the words out before howling with laughter.
“I think I’m in love. I can’t believe I found a woman who not only appreciates but also just referenced Ford Fairlaine.”
&nb
sp; My heart seized over the love comment, so I just brushed it off. Given our conversation, I think he meant it in jest. Either way, I wasn’t going there—yet.
“I like Star Wars, too.”
“Be still my heart.” He laughed.
“C’mon. Tell me.”
He just laughed and changed the subject. “I’d like to make up for running out on you this morning. Can I take you out tomorrow night?”
I considered holding out—briefly—until he told me the name of his penis, but I couldn’t do it. “You don’t have to make up for that, but yes, I’d love to see you tomorrow. What do you have in mind?”
“There’s a great Italian place on Royal. That’s where the pizza came from the other night.”
“That sounds fabulous. What time?”
“Pick you up at seven?”
“It’s a date.” We lapsed into silence again, and I heard him stifle a yawn. “I should let you get some sleep, especially if you’re going to be on the road for three hours.”
“Worried about me?”
“Of course. I don’t want you to miss our date,” I teased.
“Neither do I.” He laughed, and didn’t hold back the yawn that followed. I felt bad for keeping him on the phone so long. “Yeah, I hate to cut this short, but I’m exhausted, babe.”
“Well, stop talking to me and go to bed.”
“Yes, ma’am. I’ll see you tomorrow, Beautiful. Sweet dreams.”
“Sleep well, handsome.”
“I will as soon as I drain The Monster. G’night.”
He laughed once more and ended the call before I could say anything. I could almost see his wink as he said it, and I chuckled at the comment.
I was sunk.
I wasn’t talking love, exactly, but I had just passed into the realm beyond like. I sent up a wish to the Universe that this was real, and that he wasn’t too good to be true.
11
Emmy
It may have been a line from a movie, but I definitely had a case of the Mondays—even though it was Tuesday. Thoughts of Ian danced through my mind, making my lips curve into a wistful smile and releasing a flutter of butterflies in my stomach.
Drawing in a deep breath, I leaned back in my chair, letting my head fall against my shoulders. My confession about Brett relieved a tremendous amount of stress, as if telling Ian liberated me from the past and allowed me to open up to him even more. His reaction was just as surprising. The over-protective alpha male persona had never done a thing for me, but Ian was different. Hell, everything with Ian had been different. The night before pretty much clinched it, but the remaining ice around my heart melted as it swelled with hope.
My silent reverie was interrupted by the ringing phone on my desk, and I scowled at the caller ID.
“Hi, Kyle. What’s up?”
“Have you got a minute?”
I forced myself to smile at his request, even though he couldn’t see me. “Sure. Do I need to come to your office?”
“Yes. Bring a notepad. We need to talk about your article.”
“I’ll be right there.”
As I stood to leave, my cell phone chimed with an incoming text.
Ian: Morning, Beautiful. Headed your way now. Should be back in Big D by 1:00
Me: Good morning, handsome! I was under the impression you’re bringing the Big D with you. *The Monster* Really??
Ian: LMAO!!
Me: That’s greatness!!
Ian: Of course it is!! I can’t wait till tonight...miss you.
Me: Neither can I! Miss you, too :(
Ian: Gotta go, babe...can’t text and drive...my girlfriend worries about me ;)
Me: Yes, *she* does! :P
Ian: Later, Beautiful :*
Oh. My. God. Ian sent a kissy face.
I dropped my phone on the desk and headed to Kyle’s office for our meeting.
If anything could kill my good mood, the meeting with Kyle managed it. I had never been so pissed, and I sequestered myself in my office for the rest of the day. It was either that or quit. I desperately needed to talk to Ian, but it would have to wait. I didn’t want to ruin our dinner, but I also didn’t want to rush over there as soon as he got home and hit him with a load of bullshit. I also knew I couldn’t put it off very long before I did tell him. Hell, I couldn’t do what Kyle asked if I didn’t. Freaking Kyle. Maybe I needed to start looking for a new job.
I was so distracted, I finally gave up on work about four o’clock and slipped out early. Why not? I could go home and soak in the tub for a while. A good soak could fix just about anything. Jules wouldn’t be there, so I’d have peace and quiet.
There was a knock at precisely seven o’clock. I opened the door to Ian, dressed exactly as he was the night we met. Yep. The ovaries exploded.
“Wow,” he said. “I’m speechless. Beautiful as always.”
Heat crawled over my face at the compliment. “Thank you. I wasn’t sure what to wear, but I thought this would be okay.”
I’d decided on jeans topped by a tank with a beaded chiffon overlay that just happened to match some earrings I had. I paired it with a lightweight shrug, just in case the restaurant was cold. With my three-inch heels, I would come up to Ian’s shoulder.
“It’s perfect.” Our gazes were locked as he pressed a kiss to the back of my fingers. “Are you ready?”
I nodded and let him lead me from the apartment to his black Chevy Tahoe.
We chatted about our day on the drive to the restaurant, and even though I was dying to blurt out the details of my meeting with Kyle, I somehow managed to hold off. After we ordered and were well into our second glass of wine, I decided I’d waited long enough. Best to just rip off the Band-Aid.
“I need to talk to you about something.”
Ian’s brows knit together and he reached for my hand. “What’s up, babe?”
“I met with Kyle, my boss, today, about your interview.” He simply smiled and nodded. “He accused me of not doing sufficient research on you—rather, on Miles. Anyway, he dug around on his own…” I exhaled. “He knows that you are Miles, and who your father is.”
He smiled again and tucked a few stray strands of hair behind my ear. “Is that what’s been bothering you?” My eyes widened at his claim. “Honestly, babe, you don’t have a very good poker face.”
“I’m sorry,” I sighed. “I wanted to protect your privacy, and I wasn’t going to divulge that information. Now I’m just pissed that Kyle knows.”
“Baby, it wouldn’t be that hard to figure out. You said you knew and just didn’t connect the dots right away. It’s not a big deal. The dba simply provides separation between both sides of my business.”
“He wants me to include it in the article. I’m sorry. I hate him.”
“What?”
I dropped my chin to my chest. “We argued about it. I told him it’s irrelevant, not to mention an invasion of your privacy. Anyway, he gave in rather quickly and said I could write it however I want on one condition.”
“Why do I have the feeling I’m not going to like what you’re about to tell me?”
“Because you aren’t.”
He threaded our fingers together and gave me a slight squeeze. “What does he want?”
Angry tears welled in my eyes. “I tried to talk him out of it, I really did, but he threatened to fire me if I don’t agree.”
Scowling, he leaned forward. “He’s coercing you?”
“I hadn’t thought of it that way, but yeah, I guess that’s what he’s doing.”
He cursed under his breath and shook his head. “What did he ask you to do?”
“I know I shouldn’t have mentioned it in the draft, but he started asking questions about Release.” I reached the part he really wasn’t going to like. “He wants me to go there and write about it.”
“Is he—” Ian clamped his mouth shut and propped his elbow on the table, holding his lightly closed fist against his mouth. He took a couple of deep breaths before
scrubbing his palm over his face. “I’m not exposing you to that place.”
At first blush, his refusal pissed me off. I was a grown woman and didn’t feel the need to be protected. The only thing that prevented me from jumping into that conversation was my anger over Kyle’s ultimatum, so I tamped down the immediate rub of indignation. One so-called crisis at a time.
“I’m so pissed at him, I’m tempted to quit, but If I do, he’ll just get someone else to write the article, someone who will write whatever he wants. He wouldn’t lie, but he’s a master of spinning information when it suits his purpose, especially if he thinks it will sell magazines.” I shook my head. “I need to fix this, but I’m not sure how.”
“Your boss is a prick.” He ducked his head to meet my gaze and jiggled my hand to get my attention. “Relax, babe. It’s okay.”
“I hate him for this. I wanted to punch him in the throat.”
“That would definitely get you fired.” He chuckled.
“I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s prompting him to push for this.”
“Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault.” He sighed heavily. “I’ll do whatever you want.”
I lifted my chin and searched his eyes for an answer that wasn’t there. “I don’t know what to do. It makes me feel weak.”
“You are not weak. You stood up to him.” He released my hand and stroked my forearm with his fingertips. The simple gesture calmed me, and the anger slowly drained away. “Frankly, I want to go have a chat with him for putting you in this position. I know how much you love your job, and I hate to see you quit over something like this.”
“Something like this?” I hissed, my anger rising anew. “He wants to invade your privacy, and it pisses me off.”
“I appreciate that, but I don’t want to be the reason you lose your job. Besides, if he’s a vindictive bastard, he can make it difficult for you to go somewhere else.”
“He’s being a bully, and I don’t want him to win,” I grumbled.
