by Angel Devlin
AUDRINA
NEW YEAR’S DAY
3PM.
I woke to claws down my face.
“Gah, Hems, you mofo. Ow.”
When the clock revealed it had past five in the afternoon, it took me another minute to believe it. Wow. I’d slept for hours. Thomas had worn me out!
I put some treats down for Hems and after fixing myself another coffee I moved to the couch. I never really suffered from hangovers so although my mouth was dry, my head was ache free, thank God.
Remembering I’d turned my phone to silent so it didn’t disturb me, I moved to collect it from my bedroom, and slumped back on the couch.
I had a DM on Insta.
@audrinaj, just be YOU.
Yeah, it was okay for @badboy69 to say that. He didn’t know about my serious lack of a love life. I opened his page up. There wasn’t much information, just photos of motorcycles, and cars. I realized the person had only a handful of followers and their page had only been opened on New Year’s Eve.
I took life advice from this person?
I wanted to cry. Basically, I’d acted like a complete ho with no regard for my personal safety because I wanted to try to be someone I was not.
And worse still, Thomas had been hot and the best fuck I’d ever had, and he was gone.
One-night-stand’s sucked. That thought made me think of him between my legs playing me with his tongue. Gaaaahhhh.
Getting off the couch, I searched the apartment from top to bottom in case I’d missed another note, then I went in the shower removing the red lipstick and smoky eyes that were smeared down my not-quite-a-sex-bomb-now features.
I spent the rest of the evening on the couch watching movies and eating several times my bodyweight in tortilla chips and salsa.
Chapter Five
AUDRINA
WED 2ND JANUARY 2019
It was all over. Christmas was done and the New Year in. I felt deflated. Like New Years should have meant a fresh new me and I was still the repellent old one.
“What is up with you? You look like you’re permanently sucking on a lemon. You’ve a hot date tonight, cheer up.”
I huffed loudly. “Sorry, I’m not coming. I don’t want to double-date with you, my brother, and this guy who is going to expect to meet whoever it is you and my brother have described. I dread to think what lies you told him. Probably that I did charity work.”
“Well, they’re meeting us here at six, so tough. We promised the guy a date with you and even the fact you hardly said a word to him on New Year’s Eve hasn’t put him off, so you’re coming out and that’s that.”
I stood still.
“What do you mean, I hardly said a word to him on New Year’s Eve. I didn’t meet him. You never said he was out that night.”
“Yes, you did. You spoke to him.”
Shit. Well I must have been even more wasted than I thought. And the poor guy still wanted to come out. He must be desperate. All of a sudden, I felt sorry for him. If he’d date someone who’d basically ignore him, he deserved a nice meal. I’d be kind, let him down gently, and reassure him there was his ideal woman out there somewhere.
In fact. I sat down next to one of the tables. Maybe I should actually give the guy a chance? My best friend and brother had told me he’s nice. He liked kittens, and I had a cat. Lesson learned, don’t fuck about with bad boys no matter how absolutely drop-dead good looking they are and how much they make your body sing. Give the nice guy a chance.
“So, do you want to see a photo of your date?” Casey said walking over. “Maybe that will persuade you to come out?”
“No.” I shook my head. “I will come out, and I promise to be nice to him even if he does nothing for me. Thanks for thinking of me and arranging the date. You never know, right? We could get along, and what do I have to lose? At worst, I’ll be out with my best friend and my brother.”
Casey raised a brow. “Does your head hurt; only with this complete change of personality I’m thinking tumor?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “Just figured a few things out.”
She put a coffee out in front of me. “Here, enjoy that, quit your funk and let’s enjoy the day. Life’s too short to be miserable.”
“Where did all this wanting to be a bad girl come from anyway?” Casey asked after the morning rush was over.
“It was on a message in the sorority chat room, that came just at a time I was feeling at my lowest ebb. My 2018 dating life sucked, Case.”
“That doesn’t mean 2019 is going to go the same way, or that deciding to have a completely different personality will make things any different, but come on, I have a jotter and pen. I think there’s some room for a little bad girl in your life.”
“Okay.” What did I have to lose?
“So, how did you feel dressed as you were, because you looked sensational?”
“I felt proud of my body. Like I made the most of it and didn’t hide. I owned what God gave me.”
“So, lets write that down.”
I watched Casey write.
How to embrace my inner bad girl in 2019
Own my body.
“Anything else?” She asked.
I nodded. “Yeah, I saw a guy I liked, and I went for it, and the sex was amazing, so write down for me to have more confidence with dates and ask for what I want. I was so bossy in the bedroom,” I giggled.
See a guy I like? Go for it!
“Oh, and I want to show off my tattoos more and not cower behind people’s stares.” I shrugged off my cardigan, then put it back on because it was cold. “Okay, I’ll do that in the Spring.”
Show off my tattoos.
She wrote something else on the paper but then we got busy again for lunch. She folded it up and put it in my purse.
At 3pm the coffee shop got quiet. “Why don’t you go home and get ready? We’ll come pick you up from your apartment instead?”
“Are you sure?” I queried.
“Wouldn’t have said so otherwise. I’m going to close up at 4pm, I’ve decided. Let’s enjoy getting ready and celebrate our first double-date of 2019.”
“Oh God, do you mean there could be more?” I mock groaned. Then I grabbed my purse and left.
All ready for 6pm, I checked out my final reflection in the mirror. I’d put on a pair of stonewashed denim jeans and a black crop vest that showed off my tattoos. I pulled my hair back in a slick ponytail and added some gloss to my pout. I had a warm jacket, so I wouldn’t freeze to death on the way there, and from then I hoped the restaurant had decent heating!
There was a knock at my door. Casey was here.
Except when I opened the door, it wasn’t my best friend who stood there but my one-night-stand.
“Erm, Thomas.” I looked behind him. “I was just on my way out.”
“Oh.” He looked disappointed.
I stood for a moment debating. Soon my best friend and brother would be here with a date I didn’t know. Standing before me was a hot piece of ass. I wished I could have both, but life didn’t work out like that.
“I’m sorry. I can’t let my date down. It wouldn’t be fair. Were you just looking for another hook-up because I realized I’m not that girl. Well, I am a little bit because it was amazing, but I would have liked to get to know you better.”
My phone pinged.
“Let me just get that. It’ll be my friend telling me she’s outside waiting.”
It was Casey all right.
Casey: Open up your Bad Girl Resolutions. RIGHT NOW.
“Excuse me a moment.” I told Thomas.
I pulled the folded-up paper out of my purse and opened it.
Own my body.
See a guy I like? Go for it!
Show off my tattoos.
But there was more to read.
Stand in front of Thomas (Tom) being dumb as fuck at not working out they are one and the same, (Dear God).
Know that the double date is cancelled.
Know that
@badboy69 was your best friend, and Tom knew to stand at the bar staring at you.
Know that @badboy69 was playing matchmaker just as you did with your best friend and brother, so you can’t complain.
Invite him in off the doorstep, you idiot. He’s all yours if you want him!!
Part of me wanted to slam the door in his face, the other wanted to drag him into my bedroom.
“I’m sorry, Rina. I should have confessed who I was the next morning, but I didn’t want to face you telling me I’d just been a good fuck and nothing more. So my plan was to appear on the double-date and hope you’d get to know me.”
I tilted my head to look at him. “So the other night was all an act?”
He shook his head vehemently. “No. I knew you were on your way to the bar with the intention of finding someone to buy you a drink, but everything from then on happened naturally. You met me with no preconceptions of my personality, of me being an apparent boring good guy.
I placed a hand over my mouth. “Oh my god, they told you what I said.”
“Your brother laughed with me about what you’d said.”
“I could do with the floor opening up and swallowing me.” I told him.
“Or you could invite me in and swallow something else. Then we could order pizza. Oh and your best friend says you’re not on shift tomorrow, which is an amazing coincidence as neither am I.”
“Hmmm, let me just think. What would a bad girl do?” I asked him.
Then I got hold of his tie and dragged him in.
THE END
Read about Ella from the boutique in Dear Future Husband out February!
DEAR FUTURE HUSBAND
Chapter One
Ella
We’d only just seemed to have had Christmas and New Year’s, but now Valentine’s Day was approaching. The shops were bursting with cuddly bears holding hearts saying, ‘I love you’, and women were coming into our boutique getting measured for the perfect dress for their weekend away or date night. It was all so romantic, and I was oh so single.
Jodi came through the door carrying my hopes and dreams. Okay it was my daily latte from HappBEANness, the coffee shop next door, but it was heaven in a cup and woke me up enough so I could make and sell beautiful clothes all day long, so I wasn’t far off.
Jodi and I ran a boutique called Sew in Style. Front of house were the garments themselves, some on mannequins and others on rails. The back of our counter went through to our workshop so we could be working when we weren’t serving customers. We had an Art Deco vibe going through the boutique and specialized in evening wear. They were clothes for occasions, so lots of mother-of-the-bride outfits, prom dresses, that kind of thing. We did the occasional wedding dress but not standard ones; only if the bride wanted maybe a 1950’s style swing dress or something a little different to the norm.
“So how are Casey and Audrina today?” I asked after my friends who worked next door.
“Oh God, they are so happy and loved up. It’s enough to make you throw up in your drink.”
“Really? I know Casey is with Jared now, but who’s Audrina dating?”
“A guy called Tom. He works with Jared apparently. Seriously, they kept giggling to each other as they were talking. It’s too much. They need to employ someone single and miserable to make customers like me feel better.”
“And me.” I sighed, picking up my latest romance book. “No boyfriend has ever brought me flowers like I read about. I want a true old-fashioned romantic relationship. Not swipe-right on Tinder.”
A customer who had been looking through the rails turned around.
“Sorry to interrupt, but I couldn’t help overhear. I saw a lady on morning television a couple of days ago who runs a dating agency and she does things the old-fashioned way. You send letters to the person she matches you up with.”
Jodi pulled a face. “Handwritten letters? Who has time for that?”
But I was already picturing spritzing the one I was sending with my perfume.
“Oh that sounds amazing. What was the lady’s name? I must look into it.”
The woman looked up while she thought. “Grace… now what was her surname? Ah, Graham, like the crackers.”
“Grace Graham. Thank you so much. I shall research that later.”
I ignored Jodi’s eye roll.
The woman brought a dress up to the counter. “I’d like to take this please. Your dresses are amazing. I hope you both know how talented you are.”
I beamed. “Thank you, and because of your recommendation about the dating lady, I’d like to give you a 10% discount today.”
The woman held her hand up. “That won’t be necessary. Oh and while I’m here do you do international delivery? Only, I’m off to Dublin in March.”
“Wow. Dublin in Ireland?” I said.
She nodded. “Yes. Quite a change seeing as I’ve lived in New York all my life, but an opportunity came up that I couldn’t refuse.”
“Oooh, what is it?” I asked.
“Ella, that could be private.” Jodi warned.
“Sorry,” I bit my lip. “I just love stories about adventure and dreams coming true, that kind of thing.”
The customer smiled. “I’m going over to be a personal assistant to a member of a rock band.”
“Oh my god. Seriously? Which one?”
“I can’t say at the moment. Part of my contract, but it’s very exciting. I’m Harlow, by the way.” She looked at Jodi and me. “So about international delivery?”
“Just for you we’d consider it.” Jodi said. “I’m sure it would be astronomical postage though. There are probably boutiques in Dublin who’d love your custom.”
Harlow shrugged. “Maybe. I know nothing about the place, other than they drink Guinness! Anyway, nice to meet you both. Good luck on the dating front.” She added before she left the shop.
“She seemed nice. What a job, working for a rock band. Ella… Ella, are you listening to me at all?”
I looked up from my phone. “Oh sorry, I was looking up that woman, Grace Graham.”
Jodi sighed. “I give up. I’ll go do the outfit of the day and then I’m going to start on the orders. You’d better stay at the front today, your head’s not in a concentrating mood.”
She was right. My mind had already pictured the slew of romantic posts passing between myself and my mystery man. He of course would turn out to be my perfect man and future husband. We may only meet in person on our wedding day…
“Your coffee’s getting cold.” Jodi nodded at it. She shook her head and walked into the back.
Jodi had thousands of followers on Instagram as she posted an ‘outfit of the day’. They were often from our own store but sometimes something she’d have found at Goodwill or from a Department Store. With long, sleek dark hair and a tall slim figure honed by yoga, she had the model pose off to a fine art. She kept asking me to do the same thing but so far I’d resisted as I was a little on the plump side, five feet four, was a little shy at times and my bobbed wavy red hair clashed with a lot of colors.
Sipping at my coffee, I sat on the stool behind the counter and fired up the laptop. I’d opened a stock screen and at the same time a browser page for investigating Grace Graham. It was time to find out what this dating agency was all about and how I could contact them. This could be my New Year’s resolution. To be brave and search for love. I felt a little tickle of excitement in my tummy. Something that had been absent for a long time in anything outside of boutique business or my daily latte! It was a welcome feeling.
Browser open, I typed in Grace Graham. In the research results came up whattheheartwants.com. I clicked the link to find only a picture of a heart and the words:
Site under construction.
Damn it.
Moving back to the search results, I found an online magazine article all about Grace, so I decided that was a good place to start to find out more about her and her agency.
Grace Graham has been matchmaking n
ow for ‘more years than she can remember’. Her agency in St. Louis, Missouri, ‘What The Heart Wants’ is best known for its practice of the matchmade couple sending at least three handwritten letters to each other before they meet or get in touch via electronic means.
“The letters go through me so they don’t know who they are matched with and therefore can’t cheat the system and get in touch with each other until after that third letter. What they write is up to them, but I always recommend they communicate from the heart about their hopes and dreams and what they are looking for out of life. After they have written their three letters, they let me know whether or not they want to meet and that’s when I arrange their blind date.”
The system has resulted in a surprising number of success stories and quite a few weddings. What does Grace think it is about her service that makes it so successful?
“It’s taking the pressure off that initial ‘getting to know each other stage’. No one has to bare their soul face-to-face to find that the other isn’t interested in what they have to say.”
And what about the fact that the ‘pen-pals’ don’t see each other?
“I match them with the information they provide to me on their perfect match. If they also get along fantastically in their letters, then I find what that person looks like physically becomes less important.”
But what about people who want to match with others online in the modern way?
“I’m moving with the times and I’m currently in the process of setting up a website and a modern system with an app! We can have both running side-by-side.”
And has Grace found her own true love? At this point she laughs.
“I’m too busy finding love for everyone else. It’s sad, but true. At the moment it makes my heart happy to match up other people. One day it might happen for me, but I’m in no rush as I love putting couples together. Work consumes me and I don’t think it would be fair right now to ask a man to compete with that.”
