Kerensa wanted to hold him tight, the desire so intense she caught her breath. Seeing her there Clem stood up, and reading the expression on her face, held out his hands to her. Without hesitation she put her hands into his, confused for an instant at the reason for them being there together.
Then she was smiling radiantly. ‘I’ve got wonderful news for you, Clem.’
‘Well?’ he said softly, moving closer until he could almost touch her body with his.
‘You have a son,’ she said, the excitement inside her bubbling over. ‘In fact, you have two sons!’
‘What? Two! Are you sure?’
‘Of course I’m sure. I’ve just witnessed their births,’ she laughed. ‘The second baby was no surprise to Beatrice, but quite a shock to the rest of us. He’s only half the size of your first born and can’t be any more than three pounds in weight. You must go up and see Alice, she’s so proud.’
‘She’s all right, isn’t she?’
‘Yes, she’s fine. Come upstairs and see her.’
‘In a minute. I want to say something to you first.’ His hands were warm as he pressed them tighter around hers. ‘I’m sorry about this afternoon, Kerensa. I behaved like a rat towards you.’
‘Forget that now, Clem. And, anyway, it’s me who should be sorry. I had no right to say those things to you.’
‘You were right,’ he said. ‘Right in what you said and right to say it.’ With his eyes fixed firmly on hers he raised her hands to his lips, kissing them both tenderly. ‘I could never hurt you, believe that.’
Before Kerensa could respond to this a flurry of movement, ending at her skirts, made them both look down.
‘Bob,’ Kerensa laughed, ‘how did you get in here?’
‘I let him in,’ Oliver said coldly from the doorway. ‘Take your hands away from my wife, Trenchard.’
‘It’s all right, Oliver,’ Kerensa said, as Clem released her hands and she scooped Bob up into her arms. ‘I’ve just come down to tell Clem that Alice has delivered twin sons.’
‘How nice for him,’ Oliver retorted, crossing the room and standing pointedly between them. ‘Then I suggest he goes upstairs and sees how his wife is.’
Clem met the anger in Oliver’s dark eyes with a direct gaze. Inside he was jubilant. He had taken back a little of the girl the other man had stolen from him.
‘If you’ll excuse me, my lord,’ he said, pride and defiance in his voice, ‘I’ll go up and see my son. That is… both my sons.’ Sweeping his coat up from the floor, he hung it in careless fashion over his shoulder and with a more than friendly smile to Kerensa, jauntily left the parlour.
Holding back his outrage at the youth’s behaviour Oliver faced his wife. Her eyes shone as she told him all about the newly born Trenchard twins, totally unaware of his growing irritation with her.
How naive you still are, he thought, his poor wife upstairs only just delivered in childbed, and Clem Trenchard here holding your hands, standing far too close to you… almost making love to you… but you did not notice it at all.
‘Beatrice was marvellous,’ Kerensa was saying. ‘She didn’t give the second little baby a smack to make it cry when he was born, says she doesn’t believe in it. She just gently blew on his little belly and he cried at once. The first one was born crying lustily. Oh, Oliver, you should see them, the babies are—’
He rudely snatched Bob away. ‘If you don’t mind, this little fellow deserves some attention, or have you forgotten all about him because of the Trenchard brats? I’m taking Bob for a long walk, a very long walk.’
‘—so tiny,’ Kerensa finished stupidly as her husband stormed out of the room.
* * *
‘Is it all right to come in?’ Oliver whispered. The Manor was quiet for the night and every sound would echo throughout its length and breadth in the stillness.
‘Yes, of course you can,’ Alice whispered back from the bed.
He closed the door behind him and crept over to her, glancing around the room by the light of the candle he was holding before putting it down.
‘Where are your babies?’ he asked, speaking now in his normal voice.
‘Beatrice and Polly have taken them into the next room so I can rest better until their next feed.’
Sitting on the bed he studied her face by candlelight, then picked up her hand. ‘How are you feeling, Alice?’
‘I’m feeling very well, thank you, Oliver. I don’t know how I would have managed without Kerensa staying with me all the time through it. Beatrice said it was all over very quickly for a first labour.’ Alice’s voice was weak and her face looked strained but she had taken on a new maturity and Oliver could feel her elation.
‘Having twins must have been a shock too, but then twins run in your family, don’t they?’
‘Well, I must admit I was frightened at first when the pains started again, but once Beatrice told me what was happening I was all right. I’ll never forget the look on Kerensa’s face, bless her. Sometimes she looks so very young.’
‘I know what you mean, Alice,’ he said vexedly.
Alice tapped him firmly on the arm. ‘Have you said anything to upset her, Oliver? She seemed so different when she came back in here after Clem had left for home. You’re not upset because she hasn’t become pregnant herself, are you?’
‘No, of course not.’ He smiled at her. ‘I wouldn’t be that unfair, Alice. I won’t be able to stay long and I’ve come to talk about you, not Kerensa. What does your husband think of his sons?’ he asked. ‘And you? You wanted a daughter and received not one son, but two. Are you very disappointed?’
‘Clem didn’t say much, but I think he’s quietly pleased. As for me, I was disappointed for a minute or so… but never mind, they’re both seemingly healthy. Perhaps I’ll have a daughter one day, and you your son, Oliver.’
‘I’d drink to that, if I’d brought one with me,’ he said lightheartedly.
‘And your future with Clem, what do you think that will hold?’ Oliver had serious doubts for Alice’s future happiness as unwelcome thoughts of her husband holding Kerensa’s hands as a lover would, filtered into his mind.
‘Oh, I’ll make it work somehow. Don’t worry about me. You just look after Kerensa, she’s very dear to me.’ Alice kissed his cheek.
‘You’re a good friend to have, Oliver Pengarron. I owe you my life, I’ll never forget that.’
He retrieved his candlestick and moved to the door. ‘Goodnight, Alice. God bless you.’
‘Goodnight, Oliver, and God bless you too.’ Oliver made his way to Kerensa. He would go to her now and make it up to her for being short with her… but he wished he knew how she felt about the young man she had once been betrothed to.
Chapter 28
Dozing in front of a small cosy fire in her sitting room, with Bob curled up contentedly on her lap, a sudden spattering of rain on the window panes woke Kerensa from a pleasant dream. Stroking the puppy who was getting too big to be on her lap, something for which Oliver would have reprimanded her if he was at home, she glanced at the clock on the mantelpiece. It was almost eleven o’clock and she was the only one in the house not in bed. She remained still, listening to the frenzied dance of rain on the glass, until the long case clock in the hall competed with the one over the fireplace to chime in the twenty-third hour.
She settled Bob for the night and looked in on Alice, who, like her sons, was sound asleep. The twins, to be baptised Philip and David, although very small, had given no cause for any concern in the two days since their birth, and Alice was to take them home to the lean-to on Trecath-en Farm on the morrow.
Clem had turned up the evening after their births to be met by Oliver who made it plain in no uncertain terms he was not welcome and his presence in the Manor house was only tolerated for Alice’s sake. He’d come again that evening but stayed only long enough to inform Alice he would arrive with his mother the next morning to take his family home. As soon as Clem had gone Oliver left for Sir Mar
tin’s for a night at the card table, and after that planned to pay a brief call on his distant cousins at Zennor before going on to look over property at Penzance.
Kerensa was thinking of Clem as she walked through the door of the master bedroom from her dressing room, tying the satin ribbons at the neck of her nightgown. As she closed the door terror raced through her when a hand was placed firmly over her mouth. She turned round to face her assailant and a quiet voice told her not to be afraid. The hand was taken away.
‘Dear Lord, Clem,’ she whispered shakily, ‘what on earth are you doing here?’
‘When I was leaving I noticed Jack saddling Conomor and as soon as he rode off, I slipped back into the house and hid.’ He had a brightness in his eyes and voice. ‘When I heard the King sisters and Daniel’s cousin going to bed, I came in here to wait for you.’
‘But why, Clem? I… I don’t understand,’ she said, endeavouring to regain her composure. ‘You must leave at once. Oliver will be back at any moment.’
‘No, he won’t. I listened in on a conversation between Jack and Nathan. I know exactly where he’s gone and how long he will be away… all night.’
Moving quickly away to the other side of the room she turned back to face him squarely. ‘Why have you done this, Clem?’
‘To see you, Kerensa,’ he replied, knowing she could read his secret thoughts, ‘why else?’
She dared to ask the next question. ‘But why exactly?’
He came over to her, the nearness of him shouting a warning to her. She felt him drawing her to him in more than spirit, compelling her to look at him, the desire on his face plain in the glow from the bright restless firelight. His lips hardly moved as he spoke the words.
‘There’s only one reason why I’m here, Kerensa—to make love to you.’
‘No…’ she breathed.
He cut off her escape before she completed a single step away from him, drawing her body to his and raising her face to look into his summer-blue eyes.
‘Let me go, Clem,’ she implored him, beating her fists on his back and shoulders, kicking her bare feet against his legs. ‘Let go of me!’
‘No, Kerensa, I won’t, not this time. You were meant to be mine from the beginning and I’m not leaving this room until I have not just a part of you, but all of you… every last part of you.’
He crushed his mouth down on hers, kissing her until her arms fell to her sides and she felt he would drain her very soul.
‘Clem, for pity’s sake,’ she gasped, when at last he brought the kiss to an end, ‘think of Alice.’
‘Forget Alice, forget everyone, now is not the time for me to search my conscience.’
She was aware of the intensity of her desire and arousal and forced herself not to look into the eyes that would melt the harshest heart. He was running his lips down her neck, behind her ears, back to her temples; demanding a response; heightening her awareness of his masculine scent, the leanness of his body; coaxing her to yield, tempting her sensuality to rise and break to the surface…
‘You must stop this,’ she murmured.
‘I’ll stop this moment if you tell me you don’t want me,’ Clem challenged her, his breath hot on her flushed face. ‘Tell me you don’t want me, tell me you don’t love me, and I’ll disappear into the night and out of your life forever.’
She did not move or struggle. She did not say a word. He only had to look down into her eyes to know he had won. Victory flooded him, body, mind and soul. There was no longer need for words. At last he could take what he wanted more than life itself. Soft, smooth arms slid up his chest and around his neck, tender fingers undid the strip of silk catching his hair and let it float to the floor. Warm, moist red lips returned the delicious pain of his next possessive kiss.
Slowly, he lowered them on to the luxurious thick carpet under their feet, opening her mouth wider with his, caressing her body through the silkiness of her gown. He touched the places forbidden to him before, then pulled apart those satin ribbons at her throat, sliding the smooth material down to present himself with her fragrant soft bare flesh. He kissed and tasted this tribute to him, so soft and silky and perfectly shaped and formed.
‘I love you, Kerensa,’ Clem whispered tenderly. ‘I love you so much it hurts, it’s eating away inside of me.’
She stroked his silky hair and traced a line down his face with a gentle fingertip.
‘You do love me, Kerensa… say it… tell me…’
She smiled dreamily. ‘I love you, Clem.’
Easing his shirt from his breeches she ran her hands over the bare skin of his back and neck, opening her lips to his again and again. Keeping his lips on hers, he lifted her nightgown.
At that instant something inside her froze. Clem’s kisses were as tender and as passionate as the moment required, his touch as silky smooth, exciting, demanding. His body was eager for hers as it sought to claim her. But he was not Oliver.
Oh my God! her mind screamed. What am I doing… Oliver!
With all the strength she could summon, she pushed Clem violently aside. Caught offguard he fell heavily towards the fire, his hand hitting a log, sending sparks flying.
‘I… I can’t, Clem. I’m sorry,’ she cried, horrified with herself. Rolling away she sat up, straightening her gown and shaking it down to her feet.
Kerensa thought he might be angry, or beg her to return to him, or come after her and try to rouse her again with more kisses. But Clem sat on the carpet with his head down in defeat. Like her he was trembling violently, but she couldn’t make out if he was laughing or crying.
She did not know what to do. ‘Clem?’
‘You love me, yes,’ he said wearily. ‘But you love him more, don’t you?’
‘Yes,’ Kerensa replied quietly. ‘I… I’m sorry. I didn’t realise that I did love him – how much – until just now.’
Clem patted the carpet beside him and sighed. ‘Sit down, Kerensa, I won’t touch you again, I promise.’
There had not been a moment before tonight when Kerensa felt she couldn’t trust Clem and quickly she decided she risked nothing by trusting him now. She returned to the carpet, sitting down close and facing him. Faces flushed by their amorous behaviour and its abrupt end, they talked.
‘I thought if I could make love to you just once, Kerensa, it would be enough to take away this terrible longing I have for you. I thought I could then face all the long lonely years I have ahead, knowing you will never be mine.’ He sighed heavily. ‘But I was wrong. If you hadn’t stopped me it would have sparked off an even greater desire inside me for you… and I would have wanted you more and more.’
‘You were thinking this way on the night the twins were born, weren’t you?’ she said. ‘Oliver noticed it but I didn’t… he must think me very young and foolish at times.’
Clem gave a short ironic laugh. ‘It’s part of the reason why he loves you.’
Kerensa’s eyes widened in surprise. ‘Loves me? Oliver?’
Clem looked away and stared into the flames of the fire. ‘Has he never told you?’
‘No.’ She was incredulous. ‘He has said nothing of the kind. Clem, why do you say he does?’
‘Because,’ he said with a feeling of desolation, ‘he told me so.’
‘You, Clem! Of all people, he told you? But why? I don’t understand.’
Clem sighed again. ‘Do you think I could have some of that fine brandy he keeps in this room?’ he said, shrugging his shoulders as if he was trying to shake off some horror. ‘I’m not finding this easy and my throat’s so dry I feel as though I’m choking.’ He rubbed at his throat to reinforce his words then got up and moved away from the burning heat of the fire while tucking his shirt into his breeches.
Kerensa brought him a glass with very little brandy in it. ‘I’m sorry it can’t be more, but Oliver would notice,’ she said, looking anxiously at Clem and feeling torn apart by his look of abject misery. She hated herself at that moment. Why did she have to keep h
urting him?
‘This will do,’ he said, drinking it straight down and handing her back the glass. He took a deep breath and let the fiery liquid burn, then soothe, the churning of his gut.
‘I’ve got an idea how you’re feeling, Clem. I wanted you too,’ she murmured, looking down at her hands tightly clasped in her lap. ‘Part of me still does… and part of me always will.’
‘It means a lot to me to hear you say that, Kerensa, but it’s better we try and forget what nearly happened. I’ll tell you how I know your husband loves you and then I’ll go.’ He gulped and cleared his throat. ‘The night you nearly died of the fever, Alice asked him… Sir Oliver… if I could see you. I was really surprised when she came downstairs and told me he had agreed. When I entered this bedroom, I thanked him. The look on his face alone was enough to tell me how he felt about you. Then he said, “You love her too.” Do you understand, Kerensa? “You love her too.” In that one short sentence he told me he loved you.’
Clem got slowly to his feet and stood in front of her. She raised her face to his. ‘There you are, my little sweet, you’ve made even the high and mighty Lord of the Manor fall in love with you.’
‘I had no idea,’ Kerensa said. ‘I’ve never known how he’s felt one minute to the next. His moods can swing so very quickly… he’s so different to anyone else I know.’
‘Perhaps that is why you love him,’ Clem said, pain burning in his eyes. Touching her hair with the lightest of caresses, he turned to go.
‘Clem, wait.’ Kerensa jumped up and took his arm. ‘When I married Oliver I felt so bad about what it did to you, but now… now I’ve realised that I love him… I feel as though I’ve betrayed you again.’
Pengarron Land Page 47
