“But what?”
“Pablo attacked Alison. She stayed in the hospital for a week, then she and Bell moved in with me. He almost killed her.”
“Is that when he hurt Bell, too?”
“Yeah. He’s a sick bastard.” She closed her fist around the sheet. “All the energy I had put into working out, I put into taking him down. I hired a lawyer.” Air caught in her throat. “I should have stopped him years before.”
“Had he hurt her before?”
“Yeah. I didn’t know about most of it. I saw a bruise on her arm right after Bell was born. I lost it. Alison got angry. She claimed she tripped and swore he didn’t do it. But I should have known. He followed the pattern of all abusers, treated her like a princess at first. Then he started isolating her from everyone. I still saw her, but not nearly enough. I was starting my business. When I’d call her or when I’d insist on seeing her, she’d tell me she was just busy being a mother. I let her pull away.”
“You can’t blame yourself.”
She swallowed. “I introduced them. Pablo and I had been training for the Ironman. He asked me out, but I wasn’t interested. He seemed nice. He was a police officer. I thought…” She swallowed.
“You didn’t know.”
Guilt filled her chest. “I should have. I grew up with abusers. Like my dad. Like my mom’s boyfriends.”
He didn’t speak for several seconds. “Were you abused?”
“A few tried to put their hands on me. One got physical, hit me, but he didn’t get anywhere and I wasn’t…I didn’t let him win. I was more worried about protecting Alison. She was two years younger.” Vicki inhaled. “What’s terrible was even after Alison and Bell came to live with me, I was angry at Alison for allowing Pablo to hurt them when she’d seen our own mom get hurt by men.”
“Someone once told me that we either grow up to make the same mistakes as our parents or make different mistakes in an overzealous attempt to not be like them,” he said softly.
Vicki considered it. “It’s true.”
“So you’re the overzealous one?” he asked.
“Yeah. No one can hurt you if you don’t let them close.”
“What about the guy you told me about? Dan? Weren’t you serious?”
“Yes and no. We dated for almost three years. But he liked his space. And I guess I did, too. There was never any talk of marriage or…” Love. “He didn’t want anything more. And I was okay with that.” Or she had been until she’d gone to him about disappearing with AWACO. She’d thought he’d at least try to talk her out of it. He hadn’t. It wasn’t even as if she’d have stayed, but right then she’d realized how little their relationship had meant to him.
“There’s nothing wrong with not wanting more.”
She closed her eyes. Was he talking about himself, too?
“Not everyone is looking for the same thing,” he offered.
“You must think I take all the fun out of dysfunction,” she said, trying to lighten the conversation.
“No, I get it. I’m an overzealous person, too. I think that’s why I…come off a little strong when I think…when I think a woman is in an abusive situation.”
“That’s not a bad quality.”
“I work at keeping people at arm’s length, too.”
“Losing your wife and child must have been unbearable.”
“It was, but I was a bit of a loner even before that. A lot of that has to do with my parents.”
“What happened?”
Silence reigned before he spoke. “Dad was a mean drunk. He never raised his hand to me or my brother, but Mom wasn’t so lucky. She finally got the courage to leave him.”
“Good for her,” Vicki said.
“He couldn’t accept it. He killed her. Then killed himself.”
She gasped. “I’m sorry.”
“Me too.” He got quiet. Something told her there was more. She wanted to ask, but instead just waited and hoped he’d share.
“I was late coming home that night. When I got there, Mom was dead on the kitchen floor. I saw my dad kill himself. For the longest time, I beat myself up for not being there to stop him.”
“I’m so sorry. But I understand why you became a cop.”
“Yeah.”
“So maybe we both take the fun out of dysfunction,” she said.
He laughed, but it came without humor. “Or maybe we’re survivors.”
“That sounds better.”
The line went silent again. She wasn’t ready to say goodbye. “Is Bell asleep?”
“Yeah. She’s such a good kid.”
“I know,” Vicki said. “I’m so afraid I’m going to mess up. I didn’t plan on having kids. I don’t really know how to be a parent.”
“Are you kidding? You’re doing an amazing job. She told me today how much you love her.”
Vicki’s chest grew warm. “She did?”
“Yeah. And I don’t think a kid could want or need anything more than to know they’re loved.”
“Well, she’s right. I do love her. I used to think my career was everything. Finishing the Ironman was huge. Now I look at her and realize what’s important.”
The conversation shifted. He told her about his brother, Christina, and his nephews. And for a little bit she felt like a teenager, holding on to every word a boy said. Lulled by the sound of his voice. Wishing and wanting. Then she remembered, Too bad he can’t be your boyfriend.
While they were talking, he went online to read about different stages of the Ironman competition. “Damn. No wonder you kicked my butt.”
She laughed.
They were about to hang up when he said. “Wait. I just got another email from Jody.”
“What does it say?”
He didn’t answer right away and then said, “Shit.”
“What?” She tightened her hand around the phone.
“I told Jody about Marisol Willis’s murder. Asked her to look into it.”
“And?”
“Willis’s ex-husband has an alibi for her murder. He didn’t do it. They found some DNA at the scene. They’re checking it. If it’s Pablo, they’ll have confirmation he’s alive and reason for a warrant.”
“So she was killed because of me.”
“You didn’t do this,” he said.
She bit down on her lip. “When will they know if it was his DNA?”
“She’s asked for them to rush it, but she doesn’t know how long it’ll take. There’s a backlog of testing to be done.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Juan walked Bell to the front of the school. Vicki had called this morning, worried the school would have a problem with him picking up Bell in the afternoon because he wasn’t listed on her paperwork. So he’d arrived early.
“Are you coming in?” Bell asked, holding his hand.
“We’re going to the office first,” he said.
As he moved, he looked around at the people standing in front of the school. Logic said Bell was safe, that Pablo hadn’t found her, but damn if he didn’t still worry.
He walked to the office counter and explained that he was Vicki’s neighbor and would be picking Bell up.
“Oh,” the clerk said, frowning. “Her mother needs to put you on the authorized pickup list.”
“Yeah, but she’s in the hospital. I can give you her phone number, and if there’s something she needs to sign before I pick Bell up, I’ll be happy to get it to you.”
It took speaking to two other people and one lady calling Vicki before the problem was solved. And he still had to get Vicki’s signature on the form granting him permission to pick up Bell that afternoon.
“I’m sorry it took so long,” the assistant principal said.
“No, I appreciate you being careful.” He wanted to warn them about Valado, but considering that would have to include the fact that Vicki was using an alias, it didn’t seem like a good idea. He walked Bell back to the front of the school where kids gathered.
&n
bsp; Bell’s grip on his hand tightened. “I kind of wish I could play hooky again.”
Someone called out Bell’s name. Juan looked over and saw a little girl standing beside the Porsche-driving bozo he’d seen on Vicki’s porch.
The girl ran over.
“Why were you out yesterday?”
“I played hooky.” Bell grinned.
“Who’s this?” The girl stared up at Juan and flinched when she saw his face.
“My neighbor. He’s not my mom’s boyfriend, but he still kissed her. Mama had a stone in her kidney. He’s a good guy like your dad. Remember the dog I told you about? She’s his.”
The girl’s father lifted a brow. “Hi, I’m Cal Phillips, Suzie’s dad. Is Nikki okay?”
“Yes, she’s fine. I’m watching Bell for a few days.”
The bell rang. Still holding his hand, Bell looked up at him. “Can I give you a goodbye kiss?”
“Yeah.” Juan knelt down. She kissed him on his scar. And damn if his heart didn’t drop.
“Mama meets me right here after school.” She pointed to the front doors.
“Bell, why don’t you come over to our house today?” Cal looked at Juan. “I mean, if it would help.”
“Can I?” Bell asked.
“I think I’d better pick you up,” Juan said. “Maybe we can ask your mom when she’s feeling better.”
“Yeah,” Cal said. “I’ll arrange a playdate with Nikki. Nice to meet you.”
Juan could tell the man didn’t mean it. And that was just fine.
* * *
“Hey.” Juan’s voice from her open doorway brought Vicki’s gaze up. He wore khaki Dockers and a white button-down shirt. His neat, freshly showered appearance made her feel wrinkled and frumpy.
She was a mess. Fear and guilt buzzed through her veins.
Juan stepped to the bed. She caught hints of men’s soap, a spicy scent that had her wanting to be closer. “Is Bell okay? Did she give you any problem?”
“No problem. She ran into her friend.” He sat down on the edge of her bed and studied her. “What’s wrong?”
Vicki blinked. “What’s not wrong? I’m scared. And I go between hoping it’s Pablo’s DNA at Marisol’s place so we’ll have proof, and hoping it’s not. Because if it is, then…she died because of me.”
He took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “First, nothing has happened to prove he knows where you are. And second, if Pablo is the one who killed Marisol, it’s not on you.”
“He’s a monster. You saw what—”
“Hey.” He put two fingers under her chin and lifted her face. “I’m not going to let him hurt you or Bell.”
She nodded. He leaned in and kissed her lips. Not a kiss meant to seduce, but one meant to comfort.
“I’ll pick her up as soon as school’s over.”
She nodded.
“What time do you think you’ll get released?” he asked.
“They said I have to wait for my doctor. He doesn’t do rounds until three or four. But—”
“Great. I’ll come here right after I pick her up.”
“I can get an Uber. You’ve already—”
“No.”
She noticed a purse under his arm. He saw her gaze lower.
“It’s Cindy Bates’s. The nurse gave it to me. Patients aren’t supposed to have personal items in the ICU. They found it in the ER.”
“You went to see her again?” Vicki asked.
“Yeah.”
“How is she?”
“The same. She’s breathing on her own, but they won’t take her off of the ventilator until she wakes up.”
“Has her family even called and checked in?” she asked.
“They haven’t called me. They could’ve called the hospital. But she has a phone in here.” He motioned to the purse. “I thought I’d see if she has any messages or texts from friends. Maybe she has someone, but they don’t know what happened to her.”
Vicki realized again what kind of man Juan Acosta was. The kind who cared for someone he didn’t even know. The kind who’d jumped the fence to help a neighbor he hadn’t met. The kind who took off work to take care of a neighbor’s kid. “That’s nice of you.”
He winked. “See, I’m a nice guy.”
“No, you’re a freaking saint.” She put her hand on his arm.
He smiled. “A saint wouldn’t be wondering if you were wearing the lacy white underwear I brought you.”
She grinned. “Okay, so you’re a saint with a libido.”
He kissed her again. This one had a hint of seduction in the delivery. Not that it lasted long or even pushed any hospital limit. It was just there in the soft way his lips touched hers. The way his finger caressed her face. The way he looked at her when he pulled back.
He continued to study her. “You look like you didn’t sleep well.”
“I didn’t.”
“Well, why don’t you try to get some rest. Let me worry about everything for a while.”
* * *
Juan walked into the office. Connor and Mark were both on their computers. Juan had almost called them last night and told them about discovering who his neighbor was and what she was running from, but not wanting to put them in any kind of trouble for not handing over information, he decided to see what Jody got today first.
“Hey,” Mark said. “We just got a call from Homicide. They found a print on the car the Bates shooter used.”
“We get a name?” Juan dropped into his chair and placed the purse and notebook containing Bates’s poems on his desk.
“We’re running it through the system now. Hopefully we’ll get something.”
“Did you see Bates this morning?” Connor asked, studying his computer screen.
“Yeah. Still unconscious. But the ER sent up this.” He held out the purse.
Connor chuckled. “I was gonna ask when you started carrying a purse.”
Juan frowned. “Bates was wearing it when she got shot. Her phone’s in here. I’m hoping to track down a friend by looking through her texts.”
Connor pushed away from the computer. “Good idea.”
“Yeah,” Juan said. “The doctor pointed out that Bates got clean and she can’t imagine she did it completely alone. Someone has to care about her.”
“I agree.” Mark leaned back in his chair until it squeaked, his gaze zeroed in on Juan. “How’s your neighbor?”
“Fine. She’s coming home today.”
“How’s the babysitting gig?” Connor piped up.
“It’s easier than I thought. I mean, I forgot to feed her lunch yesterday.” Juan exhaled. “But I’m learning.” He leaned back in his chair, remembering the kiss on his cheek. “She’s a good kid.”
“Mildred was raving about how smart she is,” Mark added.
“Yeah, she is.”
“So you’re making out with her mom, but you aren’t her boyfriend?” Humor punctuated Connor’s question.
Juan frowned at Mark, knowing that info had come from him, since Bell had shared it with him at the hospital yesterday.
Mark shrugged. “Sorry. It was funny.”
“Right.” But Juan didn’t want to talk about Vicki yet. He glanced at his phone, wishing Jody would call.
Mark stood up. “You know the Bolton case we talked about looking into next? I made a few calls and thought I’d start doing some legwork since we’re on hold on this one. Call me if you need me.”
“Yeah,” Juan said.
“I’m going to grab lunch.” Connor stood. “You want me to bring you something back? A burger? A Hooters waitress?”
“I’m fine.” His partners left. Juan stared at his phone again. Five minutes later, realizing he was wasting time, he opened Bates’s purse.
Pulling out her phone, he spotted something white and furry at the bottom. He turned the purse over and shook it. A white rabbit’s foot rolled out.
Rabbit’s foot? Why was this familiar?
It took several seconds, but he
remembered. The picture of Abby Noel holding one. Mrs. Noel’s words replayed in his head. She made the cheerleading team that day. She said it was her lucky rabbit’s foot. She took that thing everywhere after that.
Was this Abby’s?
Juan picked up Cindy’s phone and it came on. The background was a photograph of a girl on a carousel horse. Hadn’t he seen it before? Then he remembered where. The half-finished painting at Cindy’s apartment.
Even then he’d thought he’d seen the image somewhere before. Where? The answer hit. At the Noels’ house, on the mantel.
But why would Bates have a photograph of it on her phone?
Shit! He yanked open the notebook and reread the poem.
Oh, my lie. Oh, my sin. Oh, my friend.
I know my place. Where you stay. Beneath the birds, and where the angels sing.
On a prayer. On a wing. But no, I still sing. I still swing.
You live in the mirror and I see your face.
Was she saying…?
He called Mark, then Connor, and told them to meet him at the hospital ASAP.
* * *
When he walked into the ICU waiting room, Mark and Connor were there.
“What’s going on?” Connor asked.
Juan motioned for them to step outside, away from the family huddled in the corner. Once out of the room, Juan said, “I don’t believe Abby Noel’s dead. She’s the one in the ICU.”
“What?” Mark asked.
“Yeah. Mrs. Noel told me that her daughter called Bates her twin friend. Said they looked alike. I saw a picture of them at the apartment that confirmed it. And there was red hair dye in Bates’s apartment. Then there’s the mystery as to why Bates was sending Noel’s daughter birthday cards. It’s because Lacy is her daughter.”
Mark rubbed his chin. “But Bates and Noel both worked at the Black Diamond. Wouldn’t someone there have noticed the switch?”
“I’m betting the turnover in the Black Diamond is fast. Star, the waitress, didn’t work there when Noel did. Even Grimes said he’d only been there the week before Noel disappeared.”
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