Traffic or no traffic, being back in LA was like a warmth washing over me. The familiar sights and sounds put my scattered mind at ease. I loved this city and I’d been gone far too long. But when I stepped into my empty house that feeling vanished. It had been four long months since I’d been home and everything felt wrong. I guess I’d grown accustomed to my two bedroom in Morocco. Or maybe the problem was that Kelly’s assistants had come to collect her furniture and clothes a few weeks ago, leaving it bare and cold inside my home. Like a shattered relic of an old memory. Dammit, she even took the bed out of my bedroom. I guess the first thing on my agenda this week would be buying some shit to fill the empty spaces.
Now if only I could buy some shit to fill the empty spaces inside me.
Telling myself to stop thinking so much, I glanced out the floor to ceiling windows that displayed the ocean. My view was superb and it was a beautiful day, but I still felt like hell. And I’m pretty sure it was all Ellie’s fault. Our brief encounter and her quick departure from my life bothered me for some random reason. Mostly, I hated that she was on my mind at all. After Kelly, I’d vowed to never let a woman have any control over me again, and I was doing just that with a complete stranger.
I had friends I could call, but it had been months and I didn’t feel up for the usual parties. Besides, I’d sworn off alcohol for a while. So, I dropped my backpack on the floor and decided to go rescue Holly from Mrs. Stone. The old woman had my cat and I wanted it back.
The walk to her house wasn’t far—only two houses down the beach from mine. Her late husband had been a director for several movies back in the seventies. He’d even won an Oscar for one of his films. Then he’d overdosed on heroine in the early nineties, which left Mrs. Stone a very rich widow. She kept to herself mostly, but was always asking me to come help when she needed a light bulb changed or something simple replaced. And in return, she’d watch my cat while I was on location.
I walked up the spiral staircase that led to her deck. Unlike my house that was set more inland, the back end of her house was on stilts and much closer to the water. She loved plants, especially anything tropical, and her back deck was covered in green.
It surprised me when I reached the top of the stairs and found Mrs. Stone sitting outside, soaking up some sun, in some sort of granny bathing suit. She had a young man sitting in a lounge chair opposite her.
“Hi, Mrs. Stone,” I said, announcing my presence.
She gasped and placed her hand on her chest. “Good heavens, Nathanial. You scared me. Well, don’t just stand there—please, come in.”
“Sorry,” I said, unlocking the back gate and entering. “I just got home from Africa and figured I’d come pick up Holly.” I had a key. She’d given it to me about six months ago. I always came in through the back, but this was the first time I’d ever found her outside on the deck. Someone had to tend to all her plants I suppose, I’d just never seen her outside.
The young man with her was her nephew. Or at least I think he was her nephew. He rose to his feet, his dark shaggy hair falling in his blue eyes, and reached over to shake my hand. We’d meet once before. I guess he was still living here. Or maybe he was a permanent fixture. Maybe the family had sent him out to California, from wherever they were from, to take care of grandma.
I didn’t ask personal questions. I preferred to keep the personal stuff to a minimum. “How’s Holly?” I asked instead.
“She’s fine,” the nephew said. “Carrie walks her daily now.” He reached for a pitcher of water sitting on a side table. Then he refilled Mrs. Stone’s drink like he was her waiter.
“Walks?” I questioned. “How does one walk a cat?” And Carrie? He’d called her Carrie. That was just weird.
“Oh, Nathanial,” Mrs. Stone gushed. “You have to see how adorable it is!”
Nephew eyed me, nodding toward the house. He wanted me to follow him and so I did. He opened the sliding glass door and there was my cat—strapped in a fucking baby stroller, fast asleep. Holy Bat Shit Crazy! What had these people done to my cat? Dropping to my knees, I started unbuckling her immediately. Holly woke up, screeched, and then took off running into the house…probably to hide under a bed somewhere so she could get away from these whack-jobs.
“I know,” the guy said, shaking his head. I stood to my feet. “And I’m sorry. Carrie gets these weird ideas in her head and I can’t do anything to shake them. But the cat has been very helpful in getting her out of the house. She hardly needs her walker anymore either. The neighbors think she’s nuts, but—”
I was staring at him with my mouth hanging open when Mrs. Stone came shuffling into the house. Her nephew had been right. She wasn’t using her walker. Plus, she seemed happier than I’d ever seen her. But maybe that was more his influence and less the influence of my cat in a stroller.
“Nathanial, can you come for dinner tomorrow?” Mrs. Stone asked, pushing the pair of heart-shaped sunglasses she was wearing back on her head.
Um? My mind started brewing up an excuse.
“I insist,” Mrs. Stone continued. “Ben’s sister is in town. She’s come all the way across the country. They’re a bit estranged. We could use a buffer.”
“A buffer?” I asked. “Yeah…I don’t know about that.”
“Yes, you would make the perfect buffer. You’re famous and handsome. You can distract her with your smile. You can tell her all about your dragon show. It might make the reunion go a bit more smoothly. You’re such a charmer with the ladies. Maybe she’ll be a looker, since Ben here is so handsome too, and it will be a mutual attraction.”
So…she was trying to set me up on a blind date with her nephew’s sister? Wouldn’t that make the sister her niece? The way she spoke it made me wonder if Mrs. Stone and Ben were actually related. Perhaps he was hired help. I glanced at Ben. He was giving Mrs. Stone a death stare. I could tell I was the last person he wanted at his ‘family dinner’ with the estranged sister.
“I told you before, Carrie,” Ben muttered. “Ellie is gay. And you can’t set her up. She’d flip out.”
My body froze and I caught my breath. No. Fucking. Way. Ellie? Was this a coincidence or God trying to torture me? What were the odds that his Ellie was my Ellie? It had to be just a coincidence in names. Right?
“And trust me,” Ben went on to say, “After everything I’ve put Ellie through, I highly doubt she’ll care about Nate West being at dinner.” He glanced at me. “No offense, man. You’re welcome, of course, but I totally understand if you already have plans.”
He was giving me an out.
But as I studied his face, trying to make a connection, I realized that the person in front of me was related to my plane girl. Ben had Ellie’s same dark hair and same vibrant blue eyes…even her same slight southern drawl. Someway, somehow, I was being given a second chance with Ellie. And I wasn’t going to skip out on it.
“I have no plans,” I told him. “I’ll be there. I’ll be your buffer.”
“Great,” Ben muttered.
CHAPTER 5:
ELLIE
I had a lump in my throat that I couldn’t shake. My stomach was knotted, my heart wouldn’t let up, and I’d never been so freaking confused in my entire twenty-four years.
All of it thanks to one individual up in first class. I didn’t like men. I never had and I’d always been fairly certain I never would. Being a lesbian was part of my identity. But for a brief moment, I’d felt something for Nate West or Nathanial or whoever he was…and I didn’t know how to make sense of those feelings.
I sat back down in my seat, across the aisle from Noah, and immediately Noah noticed something was wrong.
“Where were you?” he asked, looking up from his crossword puzzle book. Not a singular crossword puzzle—but an entire book. The nerd had brought an entire book of crosswords along on our vacation. Meanwhile, Georgina was fast asleep with her head resting against his shoulder, looking very peaceful and relaxed. It almost warmed my frantic heart seeing
her at ease. Almost, but not quite.
Shrugging off his question, too embarrassed to ever admit the truth, I put in my ear buds and pretended I was fine. I tried to zone out to some angry alternative rock music, but it didn’t work. I kept waiting for Nathanial to follow after me. And when he didn’t, I couldn’t decide if I was relieved or disappointed. Relieved. What the hell would I have told my friends if a man came chasing after me? So I had to be relieved. But I was also disappointed.
Four hours later, we got off the plane. And my emotions were still cracking and shattering, adding to all the stress I was already under. We had to walk through the first class section to exit. And, lo and behold, there was Nate West…asleep. He looked kind of adorable cramped up against the window with his large hands tucked under his face. And I hated him for it.
Because seeing him again hurt. It hurt because I was feeling such a mix of emotions while this asshole was off in dreamland—probably dreaming about round asses and perfect tits on girls who weren’t suddenly confused about their sexuality.
What the hell ever.
I was about to walk past him and possibly never watch his show again—when Rhett, who happened to be walking in front of me, noticed there was a celebrity among us. His eyes lit up as he turned around to nudge me. “Yo, Ellie. Look who it is.” He dropped his bag on the ground, holding up traffic, pulling his phone from his pocket. “It’s your favorite actor. We should take a selfie with him in the background. He’ll never know.”
“Just go,” I whispered, glaring at Rhett and his stupid face. Of all the times to get on my damn nerves, he had to pick right this moment, right when I felt like I could burst into tears at any given second. “I don’t want a selfie with him.”
“C’mon,” he begged. “You’ll regret it if you don’t do this.”
I could tell by the twinkle in his eye and the smile on his lips that Rhett wouldn’t be budging until I complied. So I let him snap our photo with Nate West fast asleep in the background. And I had every intention of stealing his phone later and deleting it.
Rhett had other plans. “I’m posting it to Facebook right now,” he said, his thumbs working furiously across his phone. “Don’t worry. I’ll tag you too.”
Rolling my eyes, shoving him along, I gave up on fighting him about the picture. I felt too foolish to care anyway. I’d had one-night stands with plenty of random girls in the past. But none of those good times had ever left me feeling as churned up as this experience had.
We exited and I told myself to forget Nate West and his charming alter ego Nathanial.
By the time we retrieved our bags from baggage claim, picked up our rental car, called my mom to tell her we’d made it alive, and made it across the city to our hotel, it was nearing dinner time. We were all starved but hopped up on excited energy. I could have settled for a quick fast-food dinner and a night in. But this was LA and everyone—everyone but me—wanted to go out immediately and do stuff.
“I really want to see a sunset on the beach,” Georgie insisted as we were debating on what to do first. “I’ve seen a million sunrises. And I want to see my first sunset on the West Coast. We all have to go see it together. Then we can eat.”
There was a hint of sadness in her eyes. Nine months ago we’d lost our brother to the Pacific Ocean. (Or so everyone thought.) And I knew, in this moment, Ben was on all our minds. Nathanial was pushed to the back burner and my focus turned to my family. I hadn’t come on this trip to kiss a man in a bathroom and then feel broken up about it. I’d come on this trip to bring my family back together. And that was my only priority. No more distractions.
“Then let’s go see that sunset. And we’ll eat after.”
* * *
Sitting with my feet in the cold sand, watching my first West Coast sunset, tears came to my eyes. Not over a boy or over the beauty of the pinks and oranges in front of my eyes—but because I was closer to my brother than I had been in months. He might even be watching this same sunset tonight. I missed him more than words could describe. And I’d see him in the morning.
Relief and excitement rushed over me.
Taking out my camera, getting my mojo back, I made Noah and Georgie pose for a few photos. Then I took one of Sydney and Rhett when they weren’t looking. They weren’t really ‘close’, just in proximity, but with the sun sinking into the water behind them it turned out to be a great picture. Maybe one day, if Rhett ever found a way to win Sydney’s heart, I could give it to them.
Once the sun went down, it grew too chilly to stay out by the water. Our group of six went for food at an overpriced, über trendy restaurant in West Hollywood. It was delicious, I was among great company, and I couldn’t have been happier. Even Luce and Sydney seemed to be warming up to one another. But then, to give Rhett some credit, he sure had a way of bringing people together.
After we went back to our hotel. The time change and the long flight had taken its toll. We were all exhausted and desperate for sleep. I set my alarm for six in the morning and then settled in to sleep next to Sydney. She was already in her pajamas, wearing an eye mask, ear plugs, and falling asleep.
The four of us—Noah, Georgie, Sydney, and I—were all sharing a hotel room because money was tight and LA was expensive. While Rhett and Luce were in a separate room. I’m not sure how that made Sydney feel, knowing Rhett was literally next door and possibly screwing some other girl, but if she cared she wasn’t showing it. Actually, I kind of envied her confidence. She had thick skin and a ‘don’t-fuck-with-me’ attitude. Luce had called her a bitch, but I knew better. She was smart, she was beautiful, and she wasn’t about fall in love with Rhett simply because he had a nice body and a pretty face. We could all take lessons from Sydney.
So with that final thought, I flipped onto my stomach and closed my eyes.
In no time at all, I was fast asleep.
* * *
The shrill beep-beep-beep of my alarm woke me. Oh God, morning. In two seconds flat I was wide awake. Then my nerves kicked in. The happy feelings I went to bed with were replaced with unsettling fear. I missed my brother but was also scared to see him again. Mostly because I had so many questions surrounding his ‘fake’ death.
Well…actually, I really only had one question.
Why?
Why had he faked his own death, put us all through the hell of losing him, and then disappeared? All of it to live with some random old lady out in Malibu, California. It was just too weird. Our family meant everything to me, flaws and all, and I couldn’t fathom ever leaving them. Why had he?
“Shit,” Noah growled from the other bed, waking at the sound of my still buzzing alarm. “Ellie, it’s too damn early. We’re on vacation. You don’t set alarms on vacation. Turn it off already.”
“Calm down, Sleeping Beauty,” I mumbled into my pillow. Blinking, I opened my eyes to a semi-light room. I reached over to stop the beeping. Sydney hadn’t woken because she had her ear plugs in and eye mask on. See, smart cookie. Maybe Noah should do the same and lighten up a little. Georgie was a sound sleeper and didn’t even budge.
Carefully, I crawled out of bed and started silently digging through my suitcase.
Deciding that I couldn’t be in Los Angeles another second without going straight to see my brother, I hurried to get ready. Ben had asked me to come today for dinner—not knowing I had Georgina and a whole slew of other people with me. But screw dinner. I was going to go see him now. Him and the old lady he was crashing with. I didn’t care how early it was.
But my nerves were getting the better of me. Even my hands shook. I stepped into the shower, giving myself a pep talk. You can do this. Pull it together!
Hurrying through the motions, I finished getting ready at record speed. When I came out of the bathroom, I found everyone still asleep. Including Noah. Briefly I thought about heading out to see Ben alone, but that had never been my plan.
My plan had been, and still was, to see him first with Noah. Because I was scared out of my mother
freaking mind at the thought of taking Georgina to see Ben. The night after his funeral, after we’d laid an empty casket in the ground, Georgina had tried to commit suicide. She’d been extremely close with our brother and she’d been devastated by his death. The image of Georgie laying in a pool of her own blood with Noah holding her and frantically doing everything in his power to save her life…well, it wasn’t an image I’d ever be able to remove from my memories.
How would Georgie react when she found out Ben was still alive and her suicide attempt had been in vain?
Oh God. That single thought scared the shit out of me. Georgina wasn’t frail. She was strong, confident, and happy. She’d changed so much for the better in the past months since Ben’s ‘fake’ death, but I didn’t want to jeopardize the progress she’d made. I didn’t want anything in this world to hurt her ever again. So, dammit, I had to proceed as cautiously as possible.
And in order to do that, I’d decided to tell Noah first. He needed to know because he was her boyfriend, because he was exceptionally protective of Georgie, and because I had a bad feeling he’d overreact when he found out. For months I’d been wanting to confide in him because that was what I always did. I always told him everything. But because of his new relationship with Georgie I’d been forced to wait until today.
The time for keeping secrets was over. I was done with Ben’s bullshit. And that’s why I’d brought all these people out to California. I’d take Noah to see Ben first, basically get all his ‘overreacting’ out of the way, and then together we would bring Georgie to see Ben later this evening.
The perfect plan. Or at least I hoped it would be. Really, it was the most cautious way I could think to handle this.
Kneeling beside Noah and his side of the bed, I softly poked his shoulder. “Noah,” I whispered, my face hovering a few inches from his. “Noah.”
Kill Devil Hills: A Complete Beach Romance Series (4-Book Box Set) Page 22
