Chapter 1 – The End of a Good Thing
“If only. Those must be the two saddest words in the world.” – Mercedes Lackey
I believe that there is a desire in every human being to achieve two things: their purpose, and their dreams. Whether one believes in God or fate or destiny, each and every one of us want to know if our lives have meaning. Either that, or if we’re just the next product on the assembly line of existence. We want to know if we are more than just a statistic, and if our story will withstand time and become legendary in its own right. Some names are almost universally known at this point: Jesus, Shakespeare, Hitler, Darwin…and of course, there are many more. One way or another, their existence on this Earth has shaped our history, for better or worse.
Now, I’m not here to discuss how to get popular or rich. That’s not the goal.
The goal is to achieve a content, happy, and financially sound life doing what you love for a living. Anything more becomes an unnecessary hindrance or distraction that I will go into detail later.
So…how does one go about achieving their purpose and dreams? Well, let’s define what they are first (taken from dictionary.com):
Purpose (N)
1.)The reason for which something exists or is done, made or used
2.)An intended or desired result
3.)Practical result, effect or advantage
Dream (N)
1.)A cherished hope; ambition; aspiration
There are a few things that we need to take from these definitions. The first is that purpose in definition # 3 says that it’s a practical result. A purpose occurs after action and practice. What this means is that there must be an effort to discovering something. If one wishes to know their purpose for living and what they can accomplish in the world, it won’t happen by remaining idle. If we do nothing, we can expect nothing. That is just a basic cause and effect principal.
If we are just sitting on the couch day by day, watching television or playing video games, and just going to work until the weekend comes…well, then it is safe to assume we will not find our purpose or reach our dreams. There is no practice or perfecting of our desires, so they never reach maturation.
Now take a look at the definition of dream, and the 2nd definition for purpose. Do you see some similarities? You should. Because dreams and purpose are closely related. Our desires and our goals are intertwined and by achieving one, you will in turn find the other. A perfect marriage of two concepts.
My wife and I were teachers once so we’ve discussed this long ago. She taught middle school and I taught high school, but our philosophies on teaching children were the same. We believed that deep down in every human being, there is…a spark (for lack of a better term) that is just begging to be energized, and only one power source can ignite it. This spark drives an individual to work hard—even in their spare time—on their craft, shaping it, perfecting it, and taking it beyond a hobby and turning it into a career. One that shouldn’t even feel like work at all.
School tries to throw many different subjects and evaluations at the student to get them to understand what they should do when they grow up and graduate, but rarely does anything stick. How do we know this?
Because there is no passion.
We believe that if everyone somehow knew their purpose and were given the opportunity to have their dreams fulfilled, there would be a passion instilled within them that no one on earth could quench. Imagine if I came to you right now, and asked you what you wanted to be more than anything. It doesn’t matter what your living situation is, how much time you have to accomplish it, or even your gender, age, race, religion or class.
What would you become?
Of course, you can provide an answer, but already you may be thinking of just how impossible or unrealistic that is, regardless of the parameters I’ve set in the question.
Now, imagine if I offered to pay all of your bills, your rent or mortgage, and take care of everything that would distract you from achieving it within the next…let’s say three years? More, if needed. And this is all assuming that I can make this happen.
What would you do?
I would be willing to bet that you would take the offer, and not only would you be ecstatic, you would probably go after that dream of yours with a drive and fire that no one on the outside could believe. Your spark would be ignited, and whether you failed or succeeded in the timeframe given, you would have no regrets, because you gave it your all.
But of course, that is just a hypothetical situation. We live in the real world after all, and the odds of anyone offering such a fantastic deal is practically non-existent.
So what do we do now?
We must first understand that our dreams and hopes are not crushed by debt, bills and responsibilities. No, it dies long before that…when we are still children. Ironically, at a young age, we are given a path and purpose to follow in life—by adults that have given up on searching for their own. Our basic path is to do well in school, go to college or the military, secure a job, hopefully procure a house, a spouse, some children…then die. There are some variations and omissions in this list depending on who is guiding you, but this is pretty much the path we are told and expected to follow. The problem, however, lies in a quote I heard once:
“Parents want what’s good for you, not what’s best.”
The word parents can be replaced with adults, teachers or even the world in general, but in a nutshell, the people that guide us want us to inevitably take a “safe” path that has a more proven track record (though that is dwindling) of success.
What’s best for you requires risk, sweat, and lots of tears. No compassionate human being wants to see you go through such suffering, but suffer we must if we want to achieve the seemingly impossible. This is not to knock on those that have raised us; it is just speaking against a mindset that has been perpetuated throughout our society for decades. Juxtapose that last quote to this next one, which speaks of how the wealthy raise their children:
“We don’t get jobs. We make them.”
Regardless of the resources at their disposal, look at the mindset passed onto their children. They won’t be following the status quo, or the same path that many of their fellow men will be traveling upon. They will seek to pave their own path, and that is what we must do now.
I know that I haven’t gotten to my story yet, but it’s only because I want to set the tone in how we should look toward our situation. Throw away the concepts that you have been taught as a child if they are counterproductive. Prepare your mind to forge your own path, and take the helm of your ship. You are confident. You are strong, and you are the author of your story. Follow the advice which was given to my wife and I by a seasoned nurse the day after we had our son:
“What’s going to happen from here on out is that you are going to get a lot of advice…but most of it won’t be what’s right for you. What you do is, you take that advice, put it into a little box in your mind and leave it there. Try out what you think is right first. Now, if what you do doesn’t work out for you, then go back into that little box and consider giving that a try, but only after you made a decision first. As the parents, you know what’s best for your child.”
You know what’s best for you, and what you need to do to accomplish your dreams. Bring all those family members and friends that would be supportive to your side, but throw all the nay-sayers to the side and ignore any hate. Life is too short for negativity, and you will have enough trials to go through without them adding on to your struggle.
You know what you have to do.
People who do not achieve their purpose or dreams (if not content in general with their life) eventually reach a breaking point. You know if you’re satisfied with your life or not, but if you’re not, know that this is where mid-life crisis’ come from.
And it makes a lot of sense.
Think about it. For most people, they have followed the path given to them, and it hasn’t gone the
way they envisioned. They have a job, but not enough money to be content. They can take vacations, but only when their company allows. They can see the world, but only if they have the money, and this doesn’t even mention the stress, debt (especially from college), relationship struggles and conflict in their lives. They won’t be able to retire until they are at least well into their sixties, and even then, they cannot enjoy life like they wished because they were so stressed for the last thirty years or so that their health has deteriorated.
Sadly, many people in our country face this reality, and it’s getting worst. With rising costs, and quality of living going down, more and more college graduates are coming out of school with crippling debt and no job to show for it. Potential retirees can’t retire because medical costs are too high. Companies are tightening the reigns, asking for more from their employees while giving less pay, all while handing out layoffs, less personal time, no pensions, and little, if any benefits. Even social security is to be gone by the time I reach the retirement age…
And I don’t say all of this to scare you, or to bring on doom and gloom. I’m saying it to make the point that achieving one’s dream and purpose is becoming more of a necessity than a luxury than ever before. Increasingly, it is getting more rewarding to try becoming an entrepreneur and striking out, than following the basic path and knowing exactly what’s going to happen to you in life for the next thirty years plus.
So…whether you are looking for your purpose, trying to drastically alter your course in life, or seeking a new adventure…here we are, right at the beginning.
My tale began, when I was just a naïve, little boy…
Novels by Julius St. Clair
Fantasy:
The Last of the Sages
The Dark Kingdom (Sage Trilogy, Book 2)
Hail to the Queen (Sage Trilogy, Book 3)
End of Angels (Angel Story, Book 1)
Angels of Eden (Angel Story, Book 2)
Obsidian Sky (Obsidian Saga, Book 1)
Thrillers:
The Deadly Ones
Science Fiction:
Upgrade (The Androids Trilogy, Book 1)
The End of Us
Romance:
My Immortal Playlist
Check out my blog!
https://juliusstclair.blogspot.com/
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The Works of Julius St. Clair (Novel Samplers) Page 22
