by Ruby Dixon
“Take you farther away so no one can steal you from me. That is the plan.” His tail flicks back and forth. “Wait until we resonate.”
Right. “But you don’t know that I’m going to resonate any time soon.”
He looks at me, his gaze even and unyielding. “I do not mind. I like spending my time with you.”
Aw. I’m having a really, really hard time staying mad now. “Well, what if I said I wanted you to take me to the fruit cave? Instead of back to the beach?”
Surprise crosses S’bren’s face. “You do not want to go back?”
“Eventually. Right now I want to see what’s out there. See all the places I’m not allowed to go because I’m a girl.” I don’t add that I won’t have the option to go anywhere interesting once I get pregnant—since that seems to be only a matter of time.
“But it is cold and snowy—”
“It’s always cold and snowy.” I touch his knee to get his attention. “You stole me. What do you want in exchange for taking me to the fruit cave?”
“Want?” His big brows furrow.
“Yeah. You scratch my back, I scratch yours sort of thing.”
“I do not need my back scratched.” He tilts his head.
I fight back the urge to giggle. One of the cutest, most endearing things about these aliens is that while they might look utterly terrifying physically, they have the most literal, pure personalities. “I don’t mean really scratching your back. I mean like, you take me to the fruit cave and I reward you. Do you want kissing, or a blow job, or something else?”
The moment the words leave my mouth, I feel my cheeks heat. Why did I throw out blow job? That’s the worst bargaining tool. Of course he’d pick that. And I…well, I wouldn’t mind, which is a little wild in itself. I wonder if the drug is still affecting me, but I don’t think it is. I’ve always been the kind of girl that’s up for a good time, and I just keep thinking about my mouth on his cock and the way he reacted. Sex isn’t a big deal to me. I’m not a virgin. But it’s a big deal to him, and it might be fun to play around with him.
As long as he doesn’t get too attached, that is. Something tells me that baby’s already been thrown out with the bathwater, though. But I also think S’bren would be able to handle it if I broke up with him or told him we were flirting just for fun. He’d be wounded, sure, but I don’t think he’d overreact like A’tam or M’tok.
Then again, the man did kidnap me and drug me.
But that was also M’tok’s plan. S’bren just likes to cast me longing looks from the shadows and tries to give me raw fish.
And he’s currently staring at me, utterly aghast.
“What?”
“Why would I kiss without resonance? As a reward?”
“Because you’ll want to learn how to please your mate when you resonate?”
S’bren shakes his head. “P’nee. Kissing should only be done because both want to touch mouths. It should not be a reward for taking you somewhere.” He looks shocked that I would even suggest such a thing.
And he’s not even bringing up the blow job. My mouth curls into a smile.
“Why do you find this funny?” He scowls.
I lean forward and kiss his cheek. “Because I just realized I’m totally safe with you.”
His expression remains disgruntled. “Why would you not be?”
“Because of last night—”
“You did not want that,” S’bren say stiffly. “I realize that now and I am ashamed I let it happen. It will not happen again.”
I pat his shoulder. “Which is why I’m safe with you. So what do you want in exchange for taking me to the fruit cave?”
“I want nothing. If you wish to go there, I will take you there.”
Awesome. I beam at him. “Road trip! This’ll be fun.”
10
S'BREN
P'nee is not mad.
She is frustrated with my choices, but now that we have talked, she is laughing and smiling, going through the supplies in this cave and talking of our new journey in the morning, heading out toward the fruit cave.
I…feel as if there is a trick. That I am waiting for her pleasant mood to turn to a bad one, but she does not hate me. It is confusing, but at the same time, I am grateful. My brother M'tok said that P'nee would be furious and I would have to woo her into my furs. That it would take time for her to forgive me but when resonance happened, it would all be worth it. But she is not mad? And when I offered to take her back, she refused.
She wants to go somewhere else. With me.
And she offered me kissing in exchange for me taking her there. She offered to blow on my skin, too, but that seems less exciting than kisses.
I want her kisses. I want her more than anything, but the kisses will not mean anything if she gives them because she must. I think of last night, when she put her hand on me only because she felt strange due to the visshek. I did not know that would happen. It does not have that effect on my people, but P’nee is human. I am ashamed that I did that to her. I thought she wanted to touch me. I hate that it was not P'nee who spoke of mouthing my cock. It ruins all of the thoughts I had about it, makes them feel dirty and wrong.
I think about that moment anyhow, though. Even though her touches were wrong—because she spoke of kissing the wrong parts of me—I still think about it far too much. I wish my brother was here to ask for advice, but he is dealing with his mate. He would know what to think of P'nee's change of heart. Me, I am confused. M'tok said that P'nee would be angry, and that when we left to go deeper into the wild, she would have no choice but to go with me. That she would be angry.
This P'nee has already gotten over her anger and has turned this into her journey. Even now, she is packing bags and talking of food supplies. She cuts down large hides to belt over her clothing so the worst of the snowy wind will be kept away from her skin.
This is P'nee's hunting trip now, and I am with her just to keep her safe and guide her.
Thinking of it that way makes me relax. This is a role I am comfortable with. Protecting P'nee? Watching over her? Have I not been doing this for hands and hands of days already?
I will do anything for her. Anything at all. All P'nee has to do is ask and it is hers.
PENNY
Traveling in the brutal season is…well, brutal. I mean, I didn't expect it to be pleasant, but I figured that I could endure it. And I can, thanks to my cootie. But that doesn't mean it's fun.
We leave our cave after two days of snow and immediately head in a different direction than I expected. S'bren leads the way, using his spear as a walking stick and plowing through the deep snow ahead of me, because my legs are too short to wade through the snow on my own. Even with double the furs bundled around us, it's still so cold that every breath hurts, and my toes are numb with the chill before long. We take several breaks as we walk, every time there's some sort of shelter from the tearing, bitter wind, and sometimes we pause so S'bren can unlace my frozen boots and put my feet on his stomach to warm them up. I do the same for him, and we talk a little, but most of the time we're just too busy enduring.
I keep expecting the big guy to tell me that this isn't worth it. That every time we stop at a hunter cave for the night that he's going to say "No more" and then I'll have to give up on my idea of going to the fruit cave. Every morning, though, he wakes up and puts out the fire, helps me bundle up, and then we set off again. I want to go to the fruit cave, and that's that. I like that about S'bren—that he doesn't make me try to change my mind. He just sees what I want to do and helps me accomplish it.
It's a good trait in a buddy and it increases my affection for him. The foot-warming stops help that, too.
Even so, it's not a fun trip, and sometimes I think maybe I'm being stupid. When it starts to snow again and we continue on, I definitely feel as if I'm making dumb choices. Don't the sa-khui stay put in the brutal season? Now I see why. Every evening in a hunter cave is an utter relief, and it takes hours to unth
aw my leather clothing from the ice crusted on them. Hours more before I feel warm. All this cold is new to S'bren, too, who came from a tropical island paradise, but he acts as if he's been in hip-deep fresh snow all his life, solidly plunging ahead and clearing the way for me to walk behind him.
Then, after several days of this, I see it. The valley.
It looks like pretty much every other valley, with clusters of the spindly pink trees flipping in the wild breeze, squatty bushes clinging to the cliffs or covered in snow…but there's also strange lumps half covered that look dark and disgusting, and the cliff walls are spattered with old, dark rust-colored stains. Blood. I'm grateful for the snow that covers everything, because I remember Nadine's description of how awful this place is and how it smelled.
There are no footprints, no trails in the snow, which means we're safe to go forward, and S'bren solidly leads me onward. He points at a narrow cliff path and waits, this time, for me. Not for me to go first, but so I can hook my hands into his belt and hold onto him in case the footholds are slippery. And then we go up the trail, which looks as if it leads nowhere, but if everything we've heard is correct, will lead us into a warm, green place burgeoning with fruit.
It sounds like paradise, especially after almost a week of the worst trek through the snow ever. I hope we're not wrong. I hope it hasn't been exaggerated.
Then, S'bren steps through a narrow opening into the cliff, and when I follow, a wall of heat blasts my face…
And then we're here.
The fruit cave is every bit the paradise I dreamed of.
We're as giddy as children on Christmas morning the moment we step inside. It's warm and muggy, and everywhere I look, there are plants. The walls drip with them. Vines curl over every inch of rock. The cave spirals up and up, and every layer of rock seems to be covered with more of the bright green plants heavy with fruit. Somewhere, water rushes in a place that sounds like a waterfall, and high above, fluorescent lighting provides a steady stream of light despite the fact that we're inside the side of a cliff.
"The ancients' greenhouse," I murmur, glancing over at S'bren.
He is utterly still. For the first time in forever, he's not looking at me. His gaze is drinking in the sight of all the vines, and then he closes his eyes and his throat works. There's a pained expression on his face and I can only imagine the homesickness he must be feeling. This is what his home was like, I bet. I reach over and take his hand, clasping it in my gloved one.
The big alien glances over at me, then clears his throat. "It is warm."
"Thank god." I grin at him, squeezing his fingers. "Now you don't have to put my feet on your stomach anymore."
"I like doing that," he tells me simply. "I like touching you."
Such a big, sweet goober. I wink at him and then release his hand. At least now that melancholy look is off his face. Instead, he's back to staring at me with that yearning expression. I ignore it and work on the thick leather belt at my waist. "We can take off our layers, at least."
"Yes, it will be good to feel my skin against warm air again."
I agree with him—it's already so warm that I'm slightly revolted at the thought of all the leather I'm wearing touching my sweaty skin. I peel off layer of fur after layer of fur, setting them down neatly in a pile, and then undress until I'm down to just my leggings and my lightest under-tunic. I turn, rubbing my cold-chapped skin absently, and glance over at S'bren.
He stands a short distance away, on one of the many ledges that lead down to yet more plants, and he's utterly buck-ass naked. His back is to me, his tail swaying back and forth in a way that says that he's in a good mood, and I stare at the most perfect, grabbable butt I've ever seen. I've seen S'bren in a loincloth a billion times, but seeing him totally naked reminds me of the failed blow job attempt. It makes me think of hot, horny things. It makes me think what a bitable ass he has. He puts his hands on his hips, studying the interior of the cave and lets out a sigh of pure satisfaction that makes heat curl in my belly.
"Well," I say after a moment. "You did say you wanted the air against your skin."
He turns to look at me, and that ridge-covered hog I definitely remember having my hand all over dangles between his legs. So do his enormous balls. Not that I'm fascinated with his balls. I just happen to notice them. Like, a lot. I force myself to meet his gaze, feeling obvious. "Is this bad, P'nee?" he asks. "When I lived on the island, we wore nothing but leaves when we needed to cover ourselves."
"No, it's cool," I bluster. I don't want him to feel uncomfortable, after all. We're friends. Buddies. After all, my buddy S'bren plowed through several days of a blizzard to get me to this paradise when he absolutely didn't have to. I'm feeling super affectionate toward him at the moment. "I've seen you naked before, remember?"
"I remember." His voice is husky and low, and doesn't sound at all like the puppyish S'bren I normally know.
It makes goosebumps rise on my skin and my nipples prick. Because now I'm thinking about that night, too, and what would have happened if I hadn't fallen asleep. What if I'd just climbed on top of him and taken him? What if he'd let me finish him off and then reciprocated the favor? What if—
Whew, and now I'm even hotter than I was before, and distracted to boot. I tug at the collar of my leather tunic. "Do you recognize these plants?"
"Some of them." He reaches out to touch a broad leaf. "Some are mysterious to me."
"They're all new to me but I'm so damn glad to see them." I move to his side, holding lightly onto his arm as I peer over the ledge. "This place is huge. Hearing the others describe it isn't the same as seeing it for myself. Why can't we live here instead of on the stupid beach?"
S'bren laughs. "Because the ledges are narrow and too many kits—and hyoo-mans—will fall and hurt themselves."
Bright blue water sparkles below, and I see runoff coming from a ledge above. There must be an old hydroponics system set up to water these plants, and it gathers at the bottom and recycles. Or something. I'm not a scientist, but I've got a vague idea how this stuff probably works. Even so, that water looks awfully inviting and I'm sweaty and feeling dirty after days and days—okay, and months—of hard living. "I bet that water's warm."
"I do not see why it would not be."
I squeeze his arm. Hard bicep. It goes with his big balls. God, I really am distracted. "Want to go in the water?"
He looks over at me regretfully. "I do not think there are fish in that lake."
"Who cares about fish?" I gesture at the plants all around us. "I'm eating salad and fruit for days, my friend. And I meant getting in the water to swim! Don't your people swim?"
S'bren grins, a boyish cast to his face. "Of course we do."
"Then let's go!"
11
PENNY
We swim for what feels like hours. The water is deep and fish-less, and I'm pretty sure that when I dive, I see a grate at the bottom, the water sucking down in a gentle flow. I don't get too close, because the last thing I want is to get sucked into an alien water filter, but it's nice to swim and bask in the warmth of this place. Eventually, I pull myself onto the rocky lip of the pool and lie flat on my back, enjoying the warmth and the artificial light. Just once, I'd love to have a blisteringly sunny day again. Even when it's “warm” here, the sunlight is weak. The light in this cave is artificial, so it's not the same. It's just another one of those things I'll have to get used to.
But the stone I'm lying on is warm and firm, and the snowy expanse outside feels very, very far away. I close my eyes, sigh, and relax.
A few minutes later, I feel S'bren's big body lie down near mine. He's covered in water, too, and he's just as naked as I am. There were a few weird moments when I undressed to swim, but he rubbed the base of his horns and didn't look me in the eye, trying to preserve my dignity or something. I just laughed, because dude undressed me when he kidnapped me. He's already seen my tits and everything else. Plus, he's balls out himself. Being in survival mode mea
ns you get a lot less shy about things. Once upon a time, I'd be ashamed of my big, too-bouncy triple-D boobs and the equally jiggly belly fat I have. Now, I just don't care. If he doesn't like it, well, someone else will.
And this rock is far too warm for me to give a damn.
I sigh, content, as he lies next to me. "Good swim?"
S'bren grunts.
"Can we stay here for like, at least a week?" I ask, opening one eye to squint over at him. "I'm in no hurry to get back out in the snow again."
"As long as we have supplies, I do not see it as a problem. If we run low on fuel or rations, we will have to return to a hunter cave, however."
I nod, studying him. He lies back flat on the rock too, one hand under the back of his head to support it. His horns are bigger and taller than the sa-khui horns, and they look like a deadly pair of scythes atop his brow, but with his hair slicked back from the water, he also looks…young. Less savage and more boyish.
"How old are you?" I ask him impulsively.
S'bren glances over at me, then shrugs. "I have seen twenty-seven full turns of the season.“
I chuckle. "I'm older than you. I'm twenty-nine.”
He shrugs. "This does not matter to me. I…" He frowns to himself and swallows the words.
"What?" I prop up on an elbow and poke him with my other hand. "What were you going to say?"
The base of his horns goes dark again. "I…would take you at any age. That is what I was to say." The words come out strangled. "I do not mean to bother you. You have said my affection is not welcome, and I remember."
I frown to myself at that. Did I say that? Did I tell him I didn't like flirty talk? Or is he assuming that because I wasn't instantly in love with his kidnapping butt that I somehow have a problem with everything? "I'm pretty easy-going, S'bren. Don't worry about offending me. Just say what you're thinking."
"I shall." He doesn't look over at me.
