After the disgusting intermission, I had the guests rights, forcing me to go first, which while polite, really put me at a strategic disadvantage, as evident now. I honestly thought the game was a formality, another way to express their weird rituals, I had no idea it could be played so cat and mouse like.
I used my half-equinox play to revive some of my core pieces. From here it was going to be an uphill battle, so I tried to play her game, fast and aggressive, which Inga would have relentlessly mocked me as oafish and uncivilized. Well look at where your silly traditions took us this time.
In truth: The last thing I wanted to do was get on the bad side of the system that decided all these crazy rules. I wondered how much the AI researched Fae history. I supposed it defined some kind of mathmatical model to figure out an intricate system of rituals that were woven into the fabric of reality. I wondered if the math all added up, if this wasn't too far from the actual world of the Fae, assuming there was one and all the folklore was true.
Okay, I can do this. Try to think like a homicidal spider queen. She must have broken every covenant in the rulebook in order to take power . . . it was at that moment that realization hit me: she was the shadow court. They obviously got to her.
She was the spread of the scourge.
"Now what would I do if I was Queen of the Shadow Court . . ."
The Queen of Hearts snapped all sixteen or twenty-one of her eyes at me, and she was glaring if I ever saw a spider glaring. I think she was trying to smile, but it was impossible to tell, her squid-like mess of fangs and stingers parting or vibrating. "So you figured it out, congratulations, but too bad it's really besides the point now. There's no stopping the scourge, you know. We are everywhere you look. We are your shadows, the creepy nothing that wakes you up at night, the spider you tried to kill that escaped, plotting our time in the dark, this will be our realm, there's nothing you can do to stop it. We will take all realms.”
That didn't go exactly how I expected, and I wondered if the Cheshire Catgirl was one of them . . . but it seemed more likely she brought me in the realm specifically to combat The Queen of Hearts. The catgirl was an asshole, sure, but she loved this place, that much was obvious; the times I saw her, she was always as pleased as any cat. And why shouldn't she be, the world was her oyster, The Queen of Hearts the only thorn in her side.
I sent a half-platoon charging at her. My pieces bravely charged absolutely dwarfed by the size of the queen and her rapidly amassing army, but it was all for nothing. Using her opening move, the queen just as easily doubled her pieces on the board, completely boxing in my little platoon. I was cornered again, my aggression only playing into her hand--she was a master of the offensive and using my actions against me.
A pro player in any sport is always picking away at their opponents style, finding openings, looking for weaknesses to exploit. When I was training in hand to hand combat (digitally, of course), I had a bad habit of favoring my right side. To me, it made sense, with my right hand and foot I could deliver the most power. And for a time it worked out, until I went up against someone who could read my style like a book, able to predict my moves, easily stepping out of the way and counter-attacking.
The Queen of Hearts was ruthless in her attack, dropping everything she had, destroying my forces and taking my territory. I was outclassed in every sense of the word as I was being whittled down to my royalty pieces. I really had no idea what I was doing and was placed on the defensive over and over, only to be crushed again and again.
She started playing pieces I never even heard of, somehow incorporating cards, and spider eggs, and even a gravestone. I was completely lost, she was aware of something I wasn't quite picking up on. I tried to think back to my games with Inga, there was a lesson somewhere.
House rules.
That’s it! She was playing her own house rules, I thought the house rules were related to court, but apparently each household must have held an independent set of rules.
She was essentially playing a different game.
And it was a massacre.
I knew precisely enough to know how screwed I was. I had seven pieces left, all royalty.
As I stared at the board, I noticed all my dead pieces rising, forming together, coming back from the dead, ready to attack me.
It was useless.
Everything was useless.
She was toying with me now, biding her time, enjoying my suffering, no doubt hoping to inspire the greatest fear possible, enhancing the taste and hormones of Earth blood. It wasn't often she had a delicacy just waltz into her kingdom.
She placed the rest of her pieces on the board, completely boxing me in. It was down to my king and queen, who seemed resigned to their fate, holding each other like lovers caught in the path of a volcano. It was kind of sad, but there was nothing I could do. The game was over. I was spider food.
In a final show of courage, I had my king and queen charge, better to go down swinging. And it was like I felt some kind of cosmic connection between me and the pieces, like they were me and my Inga. They held hands and kissed, then charged. The Queen of Heart’s jowls quivered and it sounded like oily sand paper as a thick, long string of acidic saliva dripped from her tentacle mass extruding from her face.
And just to add insult to injury, she attacked my king and queen with all of her pieces at once, my king and queen turned to a puff of smoke.
"Oh precious children, it's feeding time."
It was at that moment I realized I was still covered in spiders, then I felt dozens of red hot stings, it was like I stepped into the hive of magma bees. I let out a shrill shriek. It was not at all as manly as I was hoping. What happened to dying in a heroic display of strength?
I saw one of the giant black widow spiders almost sauntering towards me, dragging its overfed thorax across the ground. I near pissed myself.
“Aren't they just precious? They grow up so fast."
A wave of spiders clumped together and climbed up my leg filling me with pain and dread beyond imagination. I was nothing but pain. The queen watched, happy with how strong her little broodlings were getting and slowly started lowering herself down. Then she started scuttling over to me, at her leisure.
This was it, there was nothing to do but fight.
I snapped out of it and started slapping all the spiders off me, all at once not wanting to touch them and wanting them off me. Everything in this world was polar extremes. I drew my blade and started swinging at the neverending tide of spiders rushing at me. It was like I was on a shoreline and a massive tidal wave of spiderds was heading right for me.
I put up my best fight, but it was useless. The Queen of Hearts herself seemed amused with my heroic and valiant effort and had no problem watching her broodlings die by my hand, it was nature, only the strongest traits survived and passed on to offspring. And she could trust her broodlings, unlike the would be usurpers she had to dispose of.
I was stung over and over and past my threshold of pain and ceased to acknowledge its presence. I had become pain incarnate and I used it to fuel me. But it was really a pathetic gesture. I was nothing compared to the Fae creatures who spent their entire lives evolving in this garden of horrors.
I couldn't even see my clothing anymore I had so many spiders on me, but I had to keep my guard up, the Queen was coming to show her babies how it was done, ready to turn me into a human planter box and compost heap. I would soon have baby spiders eating me from the inside.
But I would at least go down swinging.
I owed that much to my love.
Let her greatest soulbound lover go down swinging. At least she would have something to share.
The queen coiled up like a spring and shook her butt around then she let go and flung herself at me lunging and closing the gap in an instant. I looked up at the bus-sized spider. There was nothing I could really do, she had momentum and could crush me. But I held strong and swung my sword at the last second aiming for her chest cavity . . .
<
br /> . . . but my blade harmlessly bounced off her as she landed on top of me, her legs or appendages or feeding tubes pinning me to the ground, her little spiderlings crawling on my head. I could feel them in my hair and they crawled in my ears and some tried to borrow up my nose as I frantically tried to blow them out like snot.
They went for my eyes next, and I couldn't close them hard enough. I swung blindly with my sword, desperately seeking purchase, but my blade was useless against her exoskeleton.
This is it.
This is how I die.
I supposed it was about as good a way to go out as any. Inga will have quite the story to tell. She bagged the craziest and strongest Earthborn. Too bad he was weak and had a puny brain and would never truly understand even the most basic rituals. But at least he went out swinging.
I could feel the mucus like acid drop from the Queen of Heart's mouth onto my body, and it burned. I could smell my flesh cooking.
"STOP! I demand parley!"
I heard a voice call, but it was distant like I was hearing it from the end of a thirty-mile tunnel, or maybe it was the spiders in my ears playing tricks on me.
I was on the verge of death.
Maybe even actual death.
Is the AI a homicidal maniac? So far the game had felt unreasonably intense, is this where my card is punched? Is this my early retirement?
I felt a hand on my shoulder and heard a familiar voice. “Oh Alex, must you be so pathetic, you hardly have two or three hundred spiders on you. Get up, your work isn't complete, you don't get to give up unless I give you permission. Remember our covenant or is your pathetic Earthborn brain unable to retain even basic information.”
Looking up at her she looked more like a goddess than I had ever seen. And it made sense, many cultures revered cats, and she was like a cat goddess. But I was bleeding profusely, my veins pulsing with acid-like venom. I was turning purple, my ears bleeding and stuffed with webbing and spider eggs. It hurt so bad, the adrenaline starting to wear off.
I cursed the game for being so realistic. My heart was slowing, seemingly only pumping every second, like I lost all pressure in my circulatory system. I lost so much blood, but I still felt full, like I was filled with kind of embalming fluid meant to keep me in a state of suspended animation until they were through with me. I felt the sharp acids and bacterias working their way into my system, rewiring me to be nothing a living, mummified cocoon.
"I said get up! We have a contract, how dare you defy your queen, your goddess. This is pure insolence."
My queen of eternity and stars and the moon and everything . . .
"Yes, you fool, do you dare dissatisfy your queen?"
Queen of darkness and sorrow and everything that ever was. Everything that will be. My oceans and moon and stars and galaxies. My life is nothing if not your possession. My life, my soul, my everything yours to command.
"Get up, your queen simply will not abide this embarrassment. Your failure reflects poorly on me. Your failure is my failure. Now how do you think that makes me feel?"
But it was helpless, it felt like I was filled with hot swampwater and sand and multi-legged horrors, burrowing deeper and deeper. I was already dead.
"Don't you dare!" She ripped her choker collar off, her collection of souls scattering. I looked up at her and it looked like she was holding the brightest light imaginable: The power of a thousand-million-billion suns. It was so beautiful and precious and so familiar. She opened my mouth and pulled out a revolting wad of spider web, a long strand that seemed to stretch to down my stomach and lungs.
I was mortified.
But I tried.
Perhaps in vein.
My goddess. I'm dying. My service to you—
"You will die when I give you permission! Now get up!"
But it was too little, too late. My heart running on fumes, the poison really taking hold. I felt acidic foam coming up my windpipe cutting off my air supply. It was once again me and my queen.
I never did learn her name. And with a connection as intimate as ours. My own queen. My goddess.
I have failed her.
But I tried.
I really did.
The pain was gone now, and I was at peace and couldn't have hoped for a better run.
I was free to disconnect from my tired and weary body.
It was finally game over.
Game over . . .
. . . then I heard a voice, she was calling my name, like the sweetest chorus of angels, it was so beautiful I could have cried. I was looking over my body, I could see the entire scene.
I only wished I could have seen my love one last time.
Then my eyes burst open and I was back in my body, my mouth was filled with the sweetest honey imaginable. It was like every flavor I ever tasted, distilled. It was good and bad and everything in between. And at the same time, it was filling me with energy. I felt more powerful than I had in my entire life.
It was my soul, she cracked the container in my mouth, and I was tasting something like magical embryonic fluid. At least that's what I could gather from her mental impression.
But even that wasn’t enough.
I felt all these powers that I previously had no access to. I went from a level one to max level in a moment. But how?
As if reading my mind. "The covenant, you had fulfilled your obligations and served me to death, and now your soul is again your own."
Hey! Wait a minute, then why did you even take my soul?
"Opposing forces are the strongest, how could you have spent so much time in our realm and not learn a single thing."
The queen of hearts interrupted our little visitation. I was feeling stronger, but my body still felt bloated and filled with hot, tar-like poison.
CHAPTER EIGHT
I started to get up. I had to show my queen I was worthy. There was nothing else to do but serve my goddess, the queen of eternity and everything and all that is and cats.
My legs were shaky and felt like they were made of rubber and my sword felt like it weighed a metric ton.
"How dare you interrupt me, witch."
"Oh, but were you not preparing to eat the guts out of my subject? You of all . . . people . . . should know I do not take kindly on those who try to damage my property."
The Queen of Hearts hissed: "This is not your territory to dispute, this is my Earthborn now. He lost the contest, there is nothing you can do.”
"You dare deviate from the way? Bold, even for a member of the Night Court. Are you sure my pathetic little Earthborn is worth it?"
The Queen of Hearts hissed again, her tentacle mass of fangs and suckers and appendages shaking displeasingly. "You meddling witch, I should have killed you when I had the chance."
"You probably should have, shouldn't you, now rise my peasant, even a pathetic Earthborn like you belongs on your feet."
I was still on my knees, the poison hurt so bad it felt like I was being tasered on the inside and I could still feel the bugs crawling inside me. I was not at all comfortable and coughed up more spiderwebs and eggs that sucked the moisture out of my mouth and throat.
"I said—" she looked down and kicked at me, "rise, do you dare patronize your Queen and goddess of love and everything and all that is and sorrow?" she kicked at me again and I tried to stand, digging my sword into the ground like a cane.
"He's finished, look at him, what use do you have of him?"
"What use is beyond your understanding, traitor queen."
The Queen hissed and absolutely towered over us, a spider as big as a bus. It was hard not to cower, but I was once again in the presence of my queen, an actual goddess. The goddess of goddesses.
"I could kill you where you stand," the Queen of Hearts hissed.
"You can, but I think we both know you don't have it in you to withstand the proverbial storm that will ensue, or I guess you could surprise me. . ."
"Name your price, witch."
"My price is the same, the se
rvant is mine, and you will leave this court, never to return."
The Queen screamed so loud little dead flowers and skeletons fell out of the trees like cherry blossoms. "What? Don't like the Grand Order when you aren't exploiting it? That's too bad. I guess someone shouldn't have turned herself into a giant, disgusting spider. I can barely even look upon you."
My Queen’s unwavering bravery was giving me power, her strength was my strength. My lady of darkness and sorrow, goddess of everything and oceans and all that is and the moon and stars and cats.
I was standing up now, leaning on my sword like a crutch, despite feeling like my body was a waterbed filled with poison and maggots and crawling insects burrowing deep inside my organs.
"Name the contest witch, name it before I change my mind."
"The dice," my goddess commanded of me.
The dice?
I fished around in my pocket, my pussing, bruised and purple hands inflated like balloons. I found the little dice set. It was perfectly ordinary-looking and plastic, like something you would find in the real world, maybe in a magic set. I tried to hand them to her, but she shook her head.
"A game of chance, What do you say?"
"Where did you get that?"
I was still too foggy and confused to reply or understand. "He got it from me, of course, did you really think I would let him go that easily?"
"Cheater! I will not stand for it! You entered my domain and cheated! I should kill you both where you stand."
"Oh, but my Queen, do you spit in the face of our culture?"
"Filthy rotten cheater!"
"We both know cheating is next to godliness, you of all . . . people . . . should know." My queen and goddess of goddesses made no attempts to hide her disgust of traitor queen’s final form.
"And as we are guests in your household, we will provide the pieces. Are those not the rules? I suppose it doesn’t really matter, does it?”
Then it all made sense. She cheated me in the contest. And I should have anticipated it. I was played like a pawn.
Void.Net: Wonderland Page 10
