* * *
She was busy loading her basket with herbs when Danr arrived back in the clearing, his eyes widening at the sight of her tangled hair and smeared cheeks, though he didn’t make any comment, casually draping his linen cloth over the drying cord instead. She didn’t speak to or acknowledge him either, concentrating on her basket, though she could feel his eyes on her lowered head and sense the tension in him, too, as if her silence bothered him. From the sound of it, he was pacing up and down the clearing, moving things that didn’t need moving, obviously struggling with holding his tongue.
‘I’m sorry,’ he burst out at last, dropping down on to his haunches in front of her. ‘I behaved badly. You’ve every right to be furious with me for staring. I was caught by surprise, but it won’t happen again. From now on, I’ll call ahead or whistle to let you know when I’m coming.’
‘You mean some kind of warning?’ She looked up at him, her lips twitching at the idea.
‘Yes.’ He knotted his brows together. ‘What’s so funny?’
‘You don’t need to give a warning. You were talking to yourself on your way there.’
‘Not to myself, to Halvar.’ He looked chagrined and then surprised. ‘Wait, you mean you knew I was there?’
‘Of course.’ Despite her resolve to be inscrutable, she couldn’t stop herself laughing. ‘It’s never hard to find you anywhere. You hardly ever stop talking except to eat or sleep.’
For a moment he looked as if he might be offended, before he smiled, too. ‘My brother Brandt used to threaten to cut my tongue out.’
‘Did that ever stop you?’
‘No. I used to talk even more to rile him. Then Alarr, my second brother, would offer to help him by holding me down. He actually sat on me once while Brandt got his seax out. They thought scaring me might do the trick, but I’m stubborn.’ He shrugged and looked sheepish. ‘So my staring didn’t offend you?’
She picked up a clump of dried sage and held it to her nose, breathing in the aroma. ‘Why would it offend me?’
‘Because you were...’ he waved a hand vaguely in her direction ‘...naked.’
‘And?’
‘And I’m a man and you’re a woman.’
She made a dismissive sound before dropping the sage into her basket. ‘There’s nothing wrong with nakedness. I’m not ashamed of my body.’
‘No, but I shouldn’t have looked—and I definitely shouldn’t have stared. It wasn’t fitting.’
‘Because you’re not my mate?’
‘Ye-es...’ he cleared his throat ‘...I suppose so.’
‘Do you want to be my mate?’ she asked, tipping her head to one side as the thought suddenly occurred to her. It seemed unlikely, but it would explain the heat she’d seen in his eyes... It was an interesting idea, too, though not one she could ever consider. Her life was solitary for a reason.
‘What?’
‘Is that why you stared? Because you want to mate with me?’
‘I don’t... I mean... I wasn’t...’ His answer, whatever it was, sounded more like a series of coughs than actual words.
She waited a few more moments in case anything more coherent was forthcoming and then stood up, hoisting her basket over her arm. ‘I don’t know what you just said, but I don’t want a mate. I told you, I live alone and you sleep outside.’
‘Good. I mean, not good. It’s not that I don’t want to mate with you, but I can’t. It’s hard to expl—’
‘Keep away from the west side of the forest today,’ she interrupted him, surprised to feel a combination of relief and disappointment at his words. ‘There’ll be people there.’
‘Why? Where are you going?’ He pushed himself up off his haunches, his expression shifting to one of concern. ‘The village is west of the forest. Surely you’re not going there?’
‘No.’ She whistled for Tove. ‘Just close to it. The villagers come to me if they’re sick or injured.’
‘But I thought you said you didn’t want anything to do with people?’ His tone turned accusing. ‘You said they couldn’t be trusted. Why help them?’
‘Because Coblaith taught me to be a healer. She gave me a purpose in life so that’s what I do. That’s why I healed you...’ she lifted an eyebrow ‘...even though you’re a warrior. I tend to people and they give me things in exchange.’
‘What kinds of things?’
‘Milk, eggs, cheese. Things I can’t produce for myself.’
‘No.’ He folded his arms. ‘You can’t go.’
‘It’s my decision, not yours.’ She thrust her jaw out. ‘You’re only here because I allow it, Norseman, not the other way around.’
‘It’s too dangerous.’
‘Why? I go every moon cycle.’
‘Because the man I fought with, Joarr, lives there now. He might suspect that you know something about me. He might ask you questions.’
‘I don’t speak. The villagers know that.’
‘He might still be suspicious.’
‘It will look more suspicious if I don’t go.’
His brow clenched. ‘I still can’t let you go alone.’
‘You can and you will. No one tells me where I can and can’t go.’
‘What if you need defending?’
‘Then I have this...’ she reached for her spear ‘...and two wolves. I don’t need a warrior to protect me.’ She started away and then looked back over her shoulder, clicking her tongue for Halvar, who immediately sat down.
‘Go.’ To her irritation, Danr gestured with his hand, urging the big wolf to follow. After a moment’s hesitation, he did, sauntering reluctantly across the clearing to join her.
She narrowed her eyes, resenting both his and the wolf’s behaviour. ‘I’m in charge of my own life and I make my own decisions. Don’t follow me.’
Chapter Nine
Danr crouched down on his haunches, placing Bitterblade within easy reach on the ground, before peering out from behind the edge of the boulder. There were several large ones here, scattered all along the edge of the forest, evidence of a rockfall from many years before. Which was particularly convenient since they gave him the opportunity to watch Erika-Bersa—he still hadn’t quite decided which name to call her—without her knowledge.
She was standing just beyond the tree line, looking out over the sea loch to the hills beyond, Tove on one side, Halvar on the other, as still and silent as a boulder herself. He’d been afraid he might arrive too late, since he’d had to follow at a cautious distance and keep upwind in case the wolves caught his scent, but by the look of things none of the villagers had arrived yet. Even so, he was further away from her than he would have liked. What if she needed him? What if Joarr threatened her? What if the massive sea eagle swooping low over the water decided to aim its ferocious-looking beak at her head?
None of which was likely, he knew. He was overreacting about all of it. It would make no sense for Joarr or any of the villagers to threaten or attack her. Never mind that she’d lived in this forest by herself for three years without anyone else’s protection. She’d only been telling the truth when she’d said she didn’t need him, but he still hadn’t been able to let her come alone. The thought of her being in potential danger made his heart thump and his chest feel tight—much the way he’d felt when she’d asked if he wanted to mate with her. For the first few seconds after she’d said the words, he’d assumed he must have misheard, or misinterpreted her at least, but she’d definitely said mate, as if the idea were actually within the realms of possibility. Of course it hadn’t taken her long to add that she didn’t want a mate—which had come as both a massive relief and a crushing blow at the same time. Even now he wasn’t sure which emotion was dominant. It ought to be relief, he knew, but if he were completely honest...
Fortunately, at that moment his attention was distracted by the arrival o
f a small group of people, five in total, two women and three men, one of them leading a horse with a litter trailing behind. As they came closer, he could just make out the shape of a person lying on the back. Six people, then, though the last seemed in no condition to fight. They stopped a few feet away from Erika-Bersa, one of the women gesturing towards the litter, and then another man stepped forward and... Joarr? Danr was halfway to his feet, clenching the grip of his sword before common sense prevailed. For a fleeting second he thought he saw Erika-Bersa’s head twist slightly towards him, before he dropped down behind the boulder and it was impossible to tell.
He took a calming breath and stretched out flat on his stomach, wriggling around the other side of the boulder to watch what was happening. Erika-Bersa was leaning over the litter now while the other villagers had fallen back, waiting with anxious expressions while she performed her ministrations. Only Joarr hadn’t moved, standing exactly where he’d been before.
Danr kept his eyes fastened on the old warrior’s face, watching for any sign of aggression, but fortunately he seemed calm. When she’d finished tending to the person on the litter, Erika-Bersa stood up and another man approached her, rolling his sleeve up to show her his wrist. She examined it, passed him something from her basket and then one of the women came closer, handing her a bundle which she took without looking at her. Finally, Joarr himself stepped forward, saying a few words before lifting his tunic and pointing at his side.
Danr gritted his teeth, watching in horror as Erika-Bersa reached into her basket again, withdrew a small pot, dipped her fingers inside and then rubbed them over his enemy’s torso. His bare torso! Anger shot through him, accompanied by a bolt of jealousy so fierce he could actually see red spots dancing in front of his eyes. It didn’t matter that she didn’t know who Joarr was. He’d told her that the person who’d tried to kill him lived in the village! And if Joarr was showing her a sword wound then surely it wasn’t hard to work out that he’d been in a sword fight recently? Couldn’t she guess who he was? Didn’t she have any loyalty?
No. The thought brought with it a fresh burst of anger. Of course she didn’t have any loyalty to him. She was only tolerating him under sufferance, that was all. He didn’t mean anything to her, no more than she ought to mean anything to him. She didn’t even want him there! And that made him even angrier.
He waited until she’d finished with Joarr before sliding Bitterblade into his scabbard and storming away.
* * *
Sissa didn’t look back. It was one of her rules. Looking back suggested either interest or fear and when it came to her dealings with the villagers she was determined to show neither—especially now, in front of the old warrior whose eyes she could feel boring into the space between her shoulder blades.
He’d asked her about Danr, or at least about whether she’d seen an injured warrior with flaxen hair and a cut to his upper arm, and it hadn’t been hard to guess the reason. Even if he hadn’t also walked with a slight limp, his questions would have given his identity away. This was the man who’d tried to kill Danr, the one he’d called Joarr...
She kept walking, glancing sideways briefly towards a crushed patch of grass beside a boulder on the edge of the clearing. Just as she’d suspected, Danr had followed her, though she wasn’t as angry about it as she’d expected to be. Even though he’d gone against her wishes, part of her was actually touched that he’d been worried enough to follow her.
She went deeper into the forest for a while, making sure she wasn’t being followed, before heading back to the clearing. The afternoon sky was leaden, threatening heavy rain to come, though Danr appeared to have made no further progress on his shelter. Instead, he was busily chopping logs when she arrived, swinging an axe in his left hand with such force that he looked in danger of splintering the chopping block, too. He’d removed his tunic so that his chest was bare except for the leather pouch he always wore around his neck and his trousers hung low on his hips, giving her an unobscured view of rippling back muscles as he swung back and forth.
She stopped, enthralled by the sight for a few seconds, before realising what she was doing and hurrying inside to put her basket away. Carefully, she hung the leftover herbs up in the rafters of the roundhouse, then put the pots inside a coffer just the way Coblaith had shown her. Then she picked up a comb and went back outside, sitting down by the fire pit as she started to unravel the knots in her hair.
Danr, she noticed, was chopping wood even more vigorously than before. It was obvious he was upset, though he could hardly tell her why without also revealing that he’d followed her. Still, she had a feeling he wouldn’t be able to remain silent for long—and it was no hardship watching his half-naked body in the meantime. In truth, it was quite engrossing. Surprisingly affecting, too, if the tingling sensation in her abdomen were anything to go by...
She sucked in a breath as muscles flexed in his back and shoulders. Now that the idea of mating had occurred to her, it was proving alarmingly hard to put out of her thoughts again. What was it he’d said that morning? It’s not that I don’t want to mate with you... What did that mean? That he actually wanted to mate with her? Which begged the question, did she want to mate with him? A warrior?
She pursed her lips. Taking a mate wasn’t a possibility that had ever occurred to her before. She lived on her own because she was safer that way, yet for the first time she was tempted. Something about him set her body to humming in a way she’d never experienced before, a way that she wanted to explore further... But he’d said that he couldn’t mate. Why not?
‘Ow!’ The comb snagged on a tangle and she muttered an oath under her breath.
‘What?’ Danr’s head spun round at once.
‘Nothing. I wasn’t speaking to you.’
‘You said something.’
‘But not to you.’ She gave him a pointed look and tugged harder on the offending knot.
‘How was your morning?’ His gaze narrowed slightly. ‘Any interesting patients?’
‘A woman suffering from stomach pains, a man with a burn on his wrist and a warrior with two cracked ribs.’
‘And?’
‘And I did what I could for them.’
‘Is that so?’ His gaze sharpened even further. ‘So how does it work? Do they tell you their symptoms?’
‘No. They gesture. They don’t know if I can speak or understand their language.’
‘So they don’t speak either?’
‘Not usually.’
‘And what about today?’
‘What does today matter?’
He flung his axe on to the ground. ‘I’d like to know if any of them asked you questions.’
‘You tell me.’ She finally succeeded in dragging the comb through the knot. ‘You were there.’
‘So I was.’ There was a moment’s heavy silence before he spoke again. ‘I wanted to be sure you were safe.’
‘I told you not to follow me. I let you stay on condition that you obeyed my rules, remember?’
‘This seemed more important.’
‘That’s not the point.’
He clenched his jaw though his expression was unreadable. ‘How did you know?’
She considered the question for a moment. How had she known? Tove and Halvar hadn’t given any indication. She’d thought she’d caught a glimpse of some movement at one point although she hadn’t actually seen him, yet somehow she’d simply known he was there. She’d been aware of him as surely as if he’d been standing right next to her.
‘I saw the grass where you’d been lying,’ she said instead. Which was true, even if it had only confirmed what she’d already suspected.
‘It could have been crushed by a deer.’
‘But it wasn’t.’
‘No.’ His jaw hardened again. ‘What did he say, the big man who spoke to you?’
‘He asked me if
I’d seen an injured warrior.’
‘Then you knew who he was!’ Danr’s eyes flashed accusingly. ‘You helped him even though you knew he was the one who did this to me!’
‘Yes. I help people who need it.’ Calmly, she disentangled a twig from the back of her neck. ‘Just because he’s your enemy doesn’t make him mine.’
‘Then you’re on his side.’ Danr folded his arms belligerently.
‘I’m on nobody’s side. I didn’t tell him anything.’
‘You still could have—’
‘No!’ She put the comb down abruptly. ‘You can’t expect me to take sides when I don’t even know what the argument is and you can’t expect me not to help someone without telling me why.’ She levelled a stare at him. ‘You talk about everything else. Why not about why you’re here?’
‘Because some things aren’t easy to talk about!’
‘Do you think I don’t know that?’
‘You’re right.’ He looked around the clearing and rubbed a hand over his face. ‘Of course you know that, but it’s not as if you’ve told me much either. All I know is that you speak Norse and that you learnt healing from a Gael woman who rescued you from the forest. I have no idea who you are or where you came from. I don’t even know your name.’
‘And all I know is that you came here for answers from a man with two cracked ribs and that you never say two words when ten will do! I don’t owe you an explanation. That was part of our agreement. You’re the one who came and asked for my help!’
They glared at each other for a few seconds, their jaws clenched, before he sighed and sat down on the tree stump. ‘Joarr was my father’s helmsman and my friend. My good friend. He was like a father to me once.’
She lifted her chin. ‘He came to the island with a woman over a year ago. I’ve seen him a few times, but he’s never asked for my help before.’
Redeeming Her Viking Warrior Page 8
