by Julie Hall
The energy it took to bottle everything up was more than I’d realized, and stripped bare as I was, I simply didn’t have the reserves to do it anymore.
Perhaps it shone through on my face, or perhaps something simply changed in Logan as well, but his pupils dilated slightly and he sucked in a sharp breath of air. The thumb caressing my cheek stopped its movements, and I held my breath as if the world around us were doing the same.
His eyes left my own and traveled my face before stopping at my lips, and as his face traveled slowly closer to my own, my eyes closed.
“This time I definitely know I’m interrupting something.” Alrik’s booming voice held no trace of apology, rather its usual, humor-filled cadence.
My eyes snapped open, and I jerked my head toward our intruder.
“You guys look . . . cozy.”
I glanced back at Logan for help, only to notice his eyes hadn’t left my face.
“Why are you here, Alrik?” Logan asked.
“Funny you should ask.” Alrik was leaning up against a tree, similar enough to Satan’s stance that a latent shiver racked my body. “I’m here to relieve your post so you can go back for a recharge. You’ve overextended your stay here . . . by a lot. But you already know that.”
“Not going to happen.”
Alrik’s laughter boomed. “Yeah, I can see that. The thing is, friend, whatever is going on here right now,” he used his hand to gesture between the two of us, still embracing, “could very well be because of your overextended Earth stay. You really want to do something you might regret later? Truth is, they want you both back, but I think I’ll have a better chance talking sense into you, than Miss Stubborn Pants over there.”
His statement hung in the air between us growing stale before he continued. “You know I’ll take good care of her. Aud’s like the little annoying sister I never wanted . . . I mean never had.”
I narrowed my eyes at his last comment. But what if he was right? What if Logan was about to kiss me simply because his emotions were raw and twisted from being on Earth too long? My feelings went deeper, but I couldn’t speak for him.
I moved my hands to Logan’s chest to push away from him. His embrace only tightened. I looked up at him and spoke softly. “Logan, maybe he’s right. You shouldn’t be down here anymore.”
Hurt flashed in Logan’s eyes before resolve replaced it. He gave a curt shake of his head. “No.”
“No?”
“I’m not leaving you here.”
“You know there’s an obvious solution to this little dilemma, boys and girls.” I waited for Alrik to enlighten us. “Aud, you just need to return like you should have done in the first place, and Logan, like a lovesick puppy, will follow you right on home.”
Logan actually growled at Alrik, who shoved off the trunk and put his hands up in front of him in a don’t-shoot-the-messenger way. “Look, Logan, you know you’re not thinking a hundred percent clearly right now. How many days has it been? We all know you want to protect her. That’s not what’s up for debate here. But how do you even know what you’re feeling right now is real and not just some messed-up hormone lust boost you’re getting from Earth’s exposure?”
I gasped and shoved hard at Logan. I tumbled from his arms, freed by his surprise, and scurried backward until halted by a tree, lightly banging my head in the process. My ribs also protested the movement. Logan looked helplessly on.
“Audrey, I—”
“No,” I held a shaky hand up to stop his progress. Alrik hadn’t said anything I didn’t already fear. “You don’t know for sure what he said isn’t true. Back when we were at the church, you said yourself you were struggling because of Earth’s influence. And then again at the shed—”
“Audrey,” Logan practically pleaded with me, “that doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t matter if it’s true. It doesn’t change—”
I didn’t want to hear it. If he was just a victim of hormones right now, I wasn’t going to let him into the deepest parts of my heart. “Oh, you betcha it matters, mister.”
“Betcha? Mister?” Suppressed mirth shone in Logan’s eyes and the barely visible upturn of his lips.
Oh yeah, I know. I’m just adorable when I’m angry.
I didn’t bother to stop my eye roll. “Yes, that’s what I said.” I crossed my arms, earning me another angry body pain, and sent him a look, daring him to make fun of me.
Oh, shoot. I had an itch on my nose. I gave it a little twitch, but the itch remained. The corners of Logan’s mouth lifted minutely before flattening again.
“Okay, all I’m trying to say is I’m not leaving you here. I’ve been crystal clear about that since the beginning when I saved you from Morgan.”
I grunted. ‘Saved’ was a liberal term. Morgan hadn’t actually been attacking me at the time.
“All right, you two.” I’d forgotten about Alrik. “Here’s the deal. They want you both back, so I’m going to lay your choices out real clearly. Door number one, Logan leaves, Audrey stays, and I take Logan’s place. Door number two, Logan stays, Audrey stays, and Logan continues to pant after Audrey like she’s a dog in heat.”
My jaw dropped. He did not just say that.
“Alrik.” Logan’s deep timber showed his displeasure.
Alrik simply shrugged and continued, “Or door number three, the best option for everyone, you both return to heaven, and a whole group of hunters will be dispatched to protect Audrey’s family.” He looked straight at me. “Because the only way your family is going to get the backup they need is if you get yourself tucked away back in our realm. You don’t leave, they won’t send anyone else. So, which door are you walking through?”
“Are you kidding me? They won’t send protection unless I leave? That’s blackmail.”
“That’s just the facts, sweetheart.” He pointed a finger at me, then Logan. “You were never supposed to be down here. He was never supposed to be down here for this long. If you think you can protect your family better than a seasoned bunch of hunters, then be my guest and continue to stay down here and cry on whoever’s shoulder you’d like. But even ignoring the fact you look pretty banged up right now, the truth is we both know they’ll be in more capable hands if you two leave.”
“That’s not very nice.” I scratched the itch I had been trying to ignore and glared at Alrik, as if this was all somehow his fault.
He glared back. “That look there you’re giving me? You need to find a mirror and give it back to yourself. If you choose to stay here, you’re not only putting yourself in danger, but also your family and this guy here, who for some reason keeps putting up with the crap you shovel his way. And I get the honor of being your new babysitter.”
I gasped and jerked back. Alrik had never been this harsh with me. Sure, he made fun of me all the time and never let a mistake go unnoticed, but it was always laced with humor and camaraderie. His attitude now was glacial.
“That’s enough.” Logan’s words rang. “She gets the point.”
The point being I’d been selfish to come down here, and it would be selfish to stay, and everyone knew it. Yeah, I got it. Shame smothered me. I couldn’t meet either of their gazes.
“Fine,” I finally said. “Logan, Bear, let’s go. Alrik, where’s our ride?”
“Perfect,” Alrik’s once-again jovial voice boomed. The quick change in his attitude was alarming. “I knew you’d pick the right door. Your winged chariot awaits.”
I still didn’t look him in the eye. Not only had his words cut me deeply, but their harsh delivery had eroded some of my trust in him. I surveyed the area outside our clearing. “Where are the other hunters?” I asked.
“They’ll be sent down directly to your family’s house as soon as you’re sent back up.”
“Are you coming back up with us?”
“Nope, I’m staying here to keep an eye on things in the meantime.”
“Good.” I meant it for more than just one reason. I was as glad he wouldn’t
be around me as I was that he was staying on Earth to watch my family.
I spotted the angel’s glow in the trees, growing shadows as he silently waited for us. I headed his way. Bear, having magically returned to his normal dog size without my notice, trotting happily at my side. Whatever injuries he had sustained from the battle appeared to have already healed. Neat trick. The pain in my ribs reminded me I didn’t heal the same way.
Logan stopped to talk to Alrik. I couldn’t make out their conversation—wouldn’t have been interested in it even if I could—but there was heat in Logan’s voice. How could I have gone from feeling so secure in Logan’s arms to once again teetering on the fence of uncertainty?
I couldn’t and wouldn’t hide my feelings from myself anymore, but that didn’t mean I had to broadcast them as clearly as I had just done in his arms.
I imagined my family members’ shadows crossing over the windows of my old house while I waited for Logan. The strings of my heart pulled once again. I knew, once back, I’d feel just as impotent as I had before I’d snuck myself down here.
I took a deep breath. A whisper in my head and heart told me to trust that my family would be cared for.
Closing my eyes, I willed myself to believe. In some ways, having my memories back was more of a challenge to my faith than not having them at all. I cared about so much more, and I had to trust it all to the Creator’s care. I’d already proven my faith was small by coming down here. It would take a miracle to boost it to the level I should be at.
A gentle hand touched my lower back, giving me a start.
“Are you ready?” Logan tried to capture my gaze, but I refused.
“Yeah, let’s go home.”
15
Heartbreak
“We’re at the healing center? What are we doing here?”
I scowled at the building in front of us. The healing center was as eye-catching as any of the other white marble buildings in the heavenly realm. The intricate mason work would rival even the most beautiful cathedrals on Earth, but I wasn’t a fan.
Even though it didn’t resemble the boxy hospitals on Earth, it was essentially our version of one, and who actually enjoyed staying in a hospital? At least this time, Logan didn’t have to carry me through the doors. I walked forward on my own two feet.
“You’re joking, right?” Logan’s stare was incredulous. “It looks like you let someone use your torso as a piñata.”
“Well, yeah, there’s that I suppose.” I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes and rubbed before letting them fall back to my sides.
Logan simply took my hand and led me into the building, Bear trotting along happily beside us. Even though I still had my gloves on, my heart fluttered at the gesture. I was used to Logan doing stuff like that on Earth, but in our realm he steered clear of any physical contact—all except the kind involving training. He was all about being up in my business during sparring, but he still never risked a touch that could possibly betray emotion.
We entered through a giant revolving door, which dumped us into the main lobby of the center. Oddly enough, I’d never been in the lobby before. The only other time I’d been to the healing center, we’d skipped the formality of checking in and gone straight to the surgical wing. I didn’t remember much of the operating room before I’d passed out, and when I woke up, I was already in a private recovery room.
I took in my surroundings this time. The three-story lobby of the healing center was quite picturesque.
A circular information desk was situated in front of us, made of pink- and blue-hued quartz. Prisms of light reflected within the material, changing colors as we moved closer to it. The top of the desk was metallic, allowing the workers to use it without being distracted by bright lights. A story above the information desk hung a giant crystal chandelier. Not the traditional type, but rather a crystal chandelier in a very literal sense. Suspended in the air was a large chunk of natural rock emitting light. It looked to be strung up by only a thin silver chain.
Varied shades of tan-colored stone and crystal coffee tables were scattered throughout the spacious room, circled by sleek sofa chairs. Behind the quartz desk a set of curved stairs led to the second and third stories of the building. In contrast with the stone materials in the lobby, the stairs were made out of wood: sliced trees, natural and unfinished except for the lacquered tops you stepped on.
The coffee bar in the back of the lobby looked to be made completely of ice. I was completely transfixed by the hot liquid flowing from an ice luge perched on top of the translucent counter. Logan squeezed my hand to get my attention. We’d reached the front desk.
Despite our disheveled appearance—okay, mostly my disheveled appearance—the attendant looked up at us unalarmed. Bear was already sprawled at our feet and out of view. I’d put my body armor back on before leaving Earth, so I supposed the attendant wasn’t seeing the extent of the damage, but my multicolored hair and tearstained face had to look a fright. I couldn’t imagine what the workers here must see regularly for us not to faze him.
“How may I help you?”
“We need to check her in immediately,” Logan answered for the both of us. “She has extensive damage to her ribs and torso that needs to be attended to.”
“Of course. I’ll get her checked in right away. I just need some basic information.”
I turned to Logan.
“You’re getting looked at too, aren’t you?”
“I will eventually.” His eyes stayed on the courteous attendant. “Her name is Audrey Lyons. Her injuries were sustained during a mission on Earth.”
The man nodded, and his fingers flew over the desk in front of him, which lit up like a computer screen as he input information.
I studied Logan’s profile, then tugged on our connected hands. “You promise?”
Logan looked down at me. His face was hard, but his eyes softened a bit. “Yeah, I promise. I just want to make sure you get taken care of first.”
I may have melted a little where I stood. I allowed myself to drown a bit in his cobalt eyes.
“Audrey?”
The surprised shout jarred me, and I instinctually released Logan’s hand. I caught a flicker of emotion in his eyes before I turned to find Jonathon jogging down the wooden steps. His eyes bounced over my face and body as if he could detect my injuries from a single glance.
He reached us faster than I would have liked.
“Where have you been?” he asked and pulled me into his arms.
I cried out at the painful embrace. Jonathon immediately released me. The concern in his eyes ratcheted up. A shuffle and low growl from the floor said Bear was issuing a warning.
“Be careful.” Logan’s low angry voice sounded at my back. “She’s injured.”
Jonathon’s eyes only skated toward Logan for a moment before settling back on me. “Of course. I’m so sorry I hurt you. I’ve just been so worried about you I didn’t think.”
My cheeks flushed with embarrassment and guilt. It hadn’t crossed my mind he would be worried about me. I hadn’t thought about him even once since this whole ordeal began. What did that say about me? Perhaps more importantly, what did that say about us?
“I was on Earth.” I mumbled the words and found my feet extremely interesting.
“Yes, we all knew that much. But none of us had any idea how you were doing. The last report that came in was from Alrik, who said you flew off with a stranger on a dragon.”
“But Logan was sent down right after that.”
Jonathon spared Logan another look. This one wasn’t friendly. “Is that what you told her?”
“Do you really think this is the best time?”
“Best time for what?”
“Logan hijacked a ride down to Earth, and from the rumors going around, the two of you disappeared shortly thereafter.”
My gaze snapped to Logan in disbelief. “You came down against orders?” Perhaps I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I was. My straight-lace
d former mentor was breaking all the rules these days.
Logan let out an exasperated breath. “Audrey, we can talk about this later.” He looked over my head. “Jonathon, she’s actually in pretty bad shape. You just can’t tell with her body armor on. She went into shock on Earth not long ago. Can I suggest we get her helped before diving into a Q and A session?”
Jonathon’s eyes snapped back to me, and as if Logan no longer existed, he placed a hand on my back and ushered me toward the stairs, sparing only a cursory nod at the information attendant to let him know he’d get me taken care of. Jonathon led me up the stairs to the third floor and then to an elevator bank. Logan and Bear trailed along behind us.
Jonathon glanced over his shoulder at Logan as we waited for the elevator. “I’ve got her now. You can go.”
Whoa, man. Possessive much?
Before I could say anything, Logan said, “You’re crazy if you think I’m just dropping her off and leaving. I risked everything to make sure she was safe. I’ve been taking care of her all on my own for the last few days.”
“Yeah, you’ve done a bang-up job of that so far. I mean that literally, by the way.”
My mouth dropped open. Jonathon never acted hostile. Ever.
The hard set of Logan’s jaw broadcasted his irritation. The two of them faced off, both visibly angry with the other, but neither of them said another word. A corner of my brain said there was a really simple explanation for all this animosity, but the rest of my mind was a pile of mush, only capable of staring back and forth between the two in confusion.
The sharp ding of the elevator broke their testosterone-filled standoff.
“Come on, Audrey, let me get you into a room so you can get looked at.”
I obediently followed Jonathon into the elevator, Bear close to my side, and turned to see Logan remained where he was standing.
I pushed the button to keep the doors open when he didn’t move. “You’re coming, right?”
His face was a blank. “Let Jonathon get you situated.”
“Excuse me?” It was my turn at incredulity.
