by Julie Hall
I shook my head. “No, absolutely not. Would you like me to remind you what I just went through?”
She shrugged. “Either way, your reveal is going to be a surprise. Just sit back and think happy Logan-filled thoughts.”
I made a mocking noise deep in my throat. I loved her, but she was a pain sometimes.
“Don’t worry. You’re going to look lovely.” Romona took my hand, and waves of calm comfort filtered through the empathy link. Underneath that was a bubble of excitement I rarely picked up from her. Whatever the end game was, she was looking forward to it. I might not trust Kaitlin not to put me in clown makeup for the fun of it, but I trusted Romona.
I nodded once. “Okay, ladies,” I said to everyone still in the tent with us, “do your worst.” I closed my eyes before snapping my lids back open. “No, I didn’t mean that. I meant do your best. Your absolute best.”
There was a chorus of light laughs around me.
24
The Reveal
I held my breath as the stylist did her work. The anticipation was killing me.
“You’re really not going to let me look?”
“No way, no how,” Kaitlin answered.
“You look beyond beautiful.” Romona’s eyes once again misted over. “Trust me, just a few more minutes and we’ll let you take a look at the finished product. You’re going to want to see this all at once.”
I blew out an annoyed breath of air. My makeup was done, and my hair was mostly ready, but these two bullies were sticking to their word and wouldn’t let me see what had been done. All I knew was that my hair was half up and half down, and that was it. I tried to touch my head once to get a feel of what was going on back there, and Romona slapped my hand away. My own grandmother!
Romona took both my shoulders in her hands and looked me in the eyes, her face a mixture of pride and something else. “Okay, now for this next part, you’re going to have to keep your eyes closed while we dress you.”
“Oh, come on. Don’t you think you’re taking this a little too far? I get it’s all fun and games to treat me like makeover Barbie for the afternoon, but really, you want me to let a stranger dress me?”
Her smile was radiant. “No strangers. This will be Kaitlin and me. Just this final step and then no more surprises. I promise.”
“Do I have to change my underwear?”
Kaitlin burst out laughing behind me.
“What?” I twisted to look at her over my shoulder. “It’s a legit question. At least let me have that privacy.”
I turned my attention back to Romona, who pressed her lips together and then finally spoke. “That’s not unreasonable. Kaitlin, will you please go grab her undergarments and we’ll all turn around while she changes into them?”
They were taking whatever was going on way too seriously.
Kaitlin slipped behind mystery curtain number two and came back out holding some very tiny panties and what could only be described as a modern torture device parading as delicate silk and white lace lingerie.
I checked behind me. All the women who were still in the tent with us were currently facing away, and Kaitlin was holding the garments out to me with a grin.
“What?” I looked at Romona for help, but her face was peacefully blank. “This is a joke, right?”
“No-pe.” Kaitlin answered.
With my thumb and one finger, I picked up what I’d thought were supposed to be underwear from Kaitlin and held them in front of my face.
“This is missing a butt.”
Kaitlin burst out laughing.
“Go find me one with a butt, and I’ll consider putting it on.”
“Audrey, all the cool kids are wearing them these days.”
“Oh shut it, you.” I narrowed my eyes. “Like you’d wear these.”
She lifted a perfectly plucked eyebrow at me.
“Oh, I’m definitely wearing something similar. Care to see?” She turned and started lifting the back of her robe.
“Stop,” I yelled and yanked her robe back in place. “I definitely do not want to see that.”
“I’m just messing with you. You’re right. I wouldn’t be caught dead in one of those, but they aren’t really for you anyway. Just think of—”
“No, she’s right,” Romona cut in. “If she’s uncomfortable with what she’s wearing, she’s going to be distracted from . . . you know, the important stuff.”
She eyed Kaitlin, who huffed and said, “Oh fine,” under her breath.
With a twirl of her hand, she materialized a bit more substance to the panties I held. They no longer resembled dental floss but covered all the important bits—even if they were still made of silk and lace and had some see-through parts. I would take this win . . . however small it was.
“Thank you,” I said rather magnanimously. “Now I’ll just slip back here to put these on.” I started toward the curtained-off area, and both Romona and Kaitlin sprang for me, yelling no at the same time.
“Whoa there,” I said and froze in place.
“You can put them on out here,” Romona said, recovering from her momentary panic. “Your . . . outfit is back there, and we don’t want to ruin the surprise. We won’t even look. Although if you need help with the corset top, let me know.”
“You mean the torture device? Yeah, sure.” I rolled my eyes.
This was getting ridiculous.
After Romona and Kaitlin turned to give me privacy, I slipped out of my clothes and pulled on the underwear before giving the corset-like top piece a valiant effort. In the end, I did need their help getting into it. There was a whole bunch of lace-up hooks in the back I couldn’t reach. But at least I was mostly covered when they helped me, even if I was now having trouble breathing.
After that they somehow talked me into closing my eyes as I went behind the curtain with them. I followed all their instructions to lift my leg, bend my arm, suck in my stomach and whatever else they threw at me. Getting me into this contraption of a dress must have taken them at least half an hour. When I tried to touch any of the material, I got my hands slapped again. They were dress ninjas who knew every time I tried to figure anything out.
At the end of the dressing session, the only thing I knew was that I now wore something long and strapless . . . and heavy. They could have just stuffed me into a cupcake-shaped gown for all I knew. But if they thought I was going to take one step out of this tent without getting a look at myself, they were in for a rude awakening.
“Okay,”—Romona held my left hand—“just a few more steps. Then I want you to lift your foot. You’re going to be stepping onto a short pedestal.”
A pedestal? “We are still in the tent though, right?”
“Absolutely.” That was from Romona, so I believed her.
As Romona guided me, Kaitlin was somewhere behind me, lifting up my dress to make walking easier. She better not be showing my rear end to a tent full of people.
“Okay, now one small step up.”
I followed their directions. Kaitlin asked me to lift one foot up at a time, and some tall yet still comfortable shoes were slipped on my feet as Romona steadied me.
Excited and nervous energy bounced off both girls. I didn’t feel malice or even humor through their empathy links, so that relaxed me a bit. If this was some elaborate joke, Kaitlin would have been throwing off some major vibes by now.
“It’s just perfect, isn’t it?” Kaitlin swooned.
“She’s more lovely than I ever imagined,” Romona answered.
“Okay, people, are you done making me your dress-up doll yet? Am I allowed to open my eyes?”
“Yes,” breathed Romona, almost too quietly to hear. “Open your eyes.”
Finally.
I let out a lungful of air and opened my eyes. I blinked a second before I realized I was actually looking at myself. The tent had been transformed while I got dressed, and most of the stations had been cleared, and in front of the pedestal I stood on were three floor-to-ceiling mi
rror panels. They were tilted in just the right way for me to see myself from several angles.
I gasped, not sure what to look at first. My dress was white. I stuck on that for a moment. The gown was the most beautiful one I’d ever seen. It hugged my chest and torso to perfection and then flowed in soft layers to the floor, allowing just the end of my shoes to poke out.
But it also showcased the ugly black-and-green veins that snaked over my shoulder. Thank goodness they were invisible to everyone but me—my own personal reminder. I forced my attention back on the dress.
The part that hugged my body was an intricate interlacing of several different materials—lace and silk and a tulle-like covering I didn’t quite recognize.
I touched it with my fingers. So soft.
“It’s called orneza,” Romona said. “It’s a material not yet invented on Earth. It’s a little like tulle, but it floats a bit more when you walk.” She indicated the semi-full skirt that was made up entirely of layers of the magical substance.
“It’s . . . white,” I replied dumbly.
She smiled and nodded.
“What do you think of the rest?” She indicated my hair and makeup. I hadn’t even looked at my face yet.
Too shocked by the wedding dress they’d put me in.
What exactly was going on here?
My eyes lifted to the mirror once again, and my breath caught. They’d turned me into a fairy princess. Minus the pointy ears and iridescent wings. My skin glowed. I turned my head each way and realized they’d applied a thin layer of shimmery powder. I pivoted so I could appreciate the unblemished side of my body.
The deep chocolate of my eyes was accentuated by shades of gold, brown, and pink. My lashes looked impossibly long and dark. A brush of color made it look like a faint blush kissed my cheeks at all times. And my skin was like fine porcelain.
I lifted my gaze to the top of my head where a delicate band of twisted metals sat. Intricate braids weaved in, out, and around the band, giving it a peek-a-boo look as well as making it appear the band and my hair together created a delicate diadem atop my head. The rest of my hair flowed in loose waves nearly to my waist—a silky, smooth river. Each loose curl brought out the natural highlights in my hair.
Had my hair grown that long without my realizing it? I’d spent so much time with it up during training, and I’d been so distracted these last few weeks, the locks must have grown without me taking note.
I was . . . overwhelmed. I’d never felt so beautiful. I’d never been so beautiful. Heavenly makeovers were magical.
But this dress. What was happening couldn’t actually be happening . . . could it?
I turned to ask them, only to find that my dress had a train that was several feet long. Romona and Kaitlin had both changed into dresses of their own. Both were the same light shade of lavender, flattering to each of them, but differing styles. Romona’s was cap-sleeved and flared at the waist to end right above her knees. Kaitlin’s was one-shouldered and flowed to the same spot without the flare. But the material and shade were exactly the same.
They looked an awful lot like bridesmaid dresses.
“You tell me right now: What’s going on?” But didn’t I already know?
Romona stepped forward. “All of this was Logan’s plan.”
Kaitlin cleared her throat loudly.
Romona rolled her eyes. “Okay, it was Logan’s idea, but he didn’t plan out all the details. You’re having your bonding ceremony today, Audrey.”
“But why am I dressed like a bride? You told me this wasn’t a wedding? And that I don’t get bridesmaids. And how did you all pull this off? And when? And . . . what?”
Do not hyperventilate.
I took a shaky step off the short pedestal and finished with a choked-up, “And I can’t.” I caught a glimpse of my shoes, which were just as gorgeous as the rest of my transformation. Light lavender to match the girls’ dresses with a decorative crystal broach that sent a rainbow of colors everywhere when it caught the light. “You don’t understand. This can’t happen. Logan knows why. He knows.”
I wasn’t making sense to them, but how could I? They didn’t know what was hanging over my head.
Romona took hold of my upper arms. She gave me a light shake and forced my attention. When I looked up, she was crying, ruining her perfect makeup.
“Audrey, stop. Do you love Logan?” Her voice was strong regardless of the tears pouring down her cheeks.
“Wh—well, yes. Of course I do.”
“Would you travel to Hell and back again, literally, to save him?”
“Yes, absolutely. I mean, I already did. Why are you asking me this?”
“Then that’s all that matters. You both love each other and have each other’s backs, no matter what.”
“But, Romona, you don’t fully understand. There are things—”
“Yes. I do understand. I understand everything.”
I was struck speechless. She couldn’t possibly know. I shook my head . . . but then I noticed her emotions leaking through the empathy link. A great sorrow lay in her heart. One she must have been covering up all day. Her devastation matched mine.
She knew.
“How?”
“Logan told all of us.”
I gasped, my head snapping in Kaitlin’s direction. Tears tracked down her face as well.
“How long have you known?” I asked.
Romona pressed her lips together. “Not as long as we should have. You should have told me yourself.”
I opened my mouth to say something but stopped when I came up short. She was right. “But I understand why you didn’t,” she continued. “The point is we love you. All of us. We’re going to fight this together. But today is your day. Yours and Logan’s. And if you think for one moment that man wouldn’t storm the gates of Hell or any other realm to be with you, then perhaps you don’t deserve him to begin with.”
I sucked in a breath. Conflicted. Bonding with Logan for eternity when all we had was maybe today was selfish, wasn’t it? The ugly mark and its tendrils didn’t let me forget I was running short on time. But bonding with me was his decision as much as mine.
“I don’t know what to do.”
“You do what you know is right.” Romona squeezed my arms to keep me in the present. “And the right person is out there right now, waiting for you to walk down the aisle and promise your forever to him.”
I gulped and glanced at Kaitlin. She was one of Logan’s oldest friends. We were close, but I knew deep down she’d always have his best interests in mind. She nodded at me once. “You need to go out there and make an honest man out of that guy.”
“Hey now, we haven’t done a single thing that would imply we haven’t been completely honorable these last . . .”
I stopped when I realized she was laughing at me.
Rolling my eyes I took a deep breath and looked at myself in the ginormous mirrors. But really I was trying to look inside. What was the right thing to do? Did I want to complete the bond with Logan? Absolutely. What held me back was the desire to do right by him. I was looking out for his own good.
I knew who I really needed to talk to about this. But I hadn’t approached Him since returning from Hell. Too worried He’d turn away from me. Too afraid He’d send me back to Hell immediately. But this decision couldn’t be made without consulting Him. I had to know I wouldn’t be hurting Logan even more than I already had. I had to know that I wouldn’t be putting his eternity in jeopardy.
I turned to my friends. “Okay, at the very least you two need to go get yourselves cleaned up. You’re both hot messes right now.” I gestured at their faces. “Like I’d let any bridesmaids of mine walk down the aisle looking like that.”
Kaitlin let out a short burst of laughter, and Romona smiled.
“Like I’d go out in public with running mascara,” Kaitlin scoffed. “It’s like you don’t know me at all.”
“Thattagirl.” Romona gave my arms one final squeeze be
fore heading to the opposite corner of the tent where a makeup station was still set up. How did I miss that before? I guess they’d planned for a possible makeup malfunction before the ceremony. I’d bet they thought they’d be fixing me instead of them.
I stepped back up on the pedestal, but instead of looking at myself, I bowed my head. It was time.
25
Ceremony
Kaitlin and Romona chattered happily across the tent. I tuned them out. My hands shook, so I squeezed them into fists. I needed a moment to collect myself. A moment to gather all the courage I had and focus it on one singular goal. I wanted to shadow box to pump myself up, but considering the circumstances and my amazing but gigantic gown, that didn’t seem practical.
Okay, Audrey, you can do this.
But that wasn’t actually the truth. The truth was that I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t do anything apart from the Creator. Apart from Hugo’s wisdom and Joe’s guidance. I’d been running myself ragged for the last two weeks trying to exist without them. Ashamed of my own mistakes but unwilling to do what needed to be done because of fear.
“Father,” I whispered. And waited.
And nothing happened.
I cracked an eyelid. I was still in the tent. I didn’t realize until then that I’d expected to be transported somewhere else like the first time I spoke with the Creator in the afterlife. But I was in exactly the same spot. Was it because He hadn’t heard me? Or didn’t want to listen?
I closed my eyes and continued, “Father, I’m not sure if you can hear me or not. In fact, I’m not sure I want you to hear me, which I feel really bad about, but I need to confess something. And I need to ask for your forgiveness . . . and I need to ask for your advice.” I paused for a heartbeat. “If not for myself, for Logan, who I know you love.”
I sucked in a cleansing breath and then released it slowly. “I’ve been hiding from You. But I guess You already know that. I’ve been . . . scared to come to You because I’m ashamed, and I’m afraid You’ll cast me out.” There, I’d gotten the first part out. “I made a terrible mistake, and it’s all my fault Satan was released. Then I lied to everyone I care about . . . about the whole thing. I’ve been plagued with guilt. And I know that what I’ve done is too big to really ask for forgiveness. But You deserve to know, straight from my mouth, how sorry I am. For all of it, but especially for hiding from You . . . and of course, for freeing Satan . . . That was really bad.”
