by Elena Aitken
He believed.
Chapter Four
“Well, isn’t this interesting?”
“Very.”
Kade ignored his brothers. He kept his stare fixed firmly on the kitchen door, where Ella had disappeared. She’d been in his life less than twenty-four hours and already his body rejected the idea of her absence. It didn’t make any sense. But at the same time, it made perfect sense.
Mate.
She was his mate.
No.
Mates were nothing but trouble. They were more than trouble. They would ruin your life.
“I know what you’re thinking.” Axel’s hand slapped on his shoulder, jarring him from his thoughts.
“No you don’t,” he growled.
“I do too.” Axel moved so he stood in his line of vision. “You’re thinking she’s your mate.”
“No.”
“Yes you are.” Luke joined Axel and they stood shoulder to shoulder. “We can see it all over you. She’s your fated—”
“No!” Kade jumped up and paced the room. This couldn’t be happening. Everything had been working out just fine before Ella had shown up. He was doing fine without a mate. He didn’t want or need a female in his life. He ran his hands through his hair and tugged the roots. His skin was hot, itchy. He felt as if he were going to combust from the inside out.
“You need to shift.”
“No.”
“Kade.”
“No!” He spun on his older brothers and growled.
Luke and Axel shared a glance but it was Luke who spoke. “I know you feel like you can’t.”
“I can’t.”
“You need to,” Luke continued, as if he hadn’t spoken at all. “It’s the only way you’re going to clear your head enough to think this through. Everything is just going to be worse if you don’t.”
“We think you’re feeling everything more intensely with Ella because you’ve repressed your bear for so long,” Axel said. “Which is remarkable in itself.” He shook his head and again they exchanged a look. “The fact that you sensed her in trouble before you’d ever even laid eyes on her…that’s something.”
“It’s nothing.” The words tasted bitter as he spoke them. Of course it meant something. It meant everything. He’d never been so worried, so consumed with fear for another person as he was when he sensed Ella’s distress. That definitely meant something.
“I don’t know why you’re fighting this, Kade, but I’ve had almost enough.” Axel crossed his arms and glared at him.
His big brother rarely took a tone of authority with him. As much as Kade wanted to ignore it, he couldn’t. But he didn’t have to accept whatever he was saying.
“Enough of what, Axel?”
“Enough of all this.” He waved his arm, gesturing over Kade. “You’ve been completely impossible to live with since—”
“Don’t say her name,” Kade warned.
“She’s our sister, too,” Luke said.
Kade shook his head. They’d never understand. “She’s my twin sister.” Twins shared a special bond in the shifter world. More so than any other sibling or any other connection. When Kade said good-bye to Kira and left her with her mate and his clan, he’d not only made the choice to go against his grandfather’s wishes, he’d made the choice to say good-bye to his other half forever. It was a decision that haunted him every day.
But there’d been no other choice. Had they decided to force her to leave with them, it would have caused a war between the clans. A problem their grandfather didn’t seem concerned about. But he also hadn’t considered the fact that Kira was in love. She was mated. To her fated mate, she’d said. She couldn’t fight it. She also couldn’t explain it. Kade had begged her to explain her choice to him. Why she’d chosen to go against everything for a mate.
She couldn’t.
She’d only looked at him, her eyes so much like his own, clouded with pain and all she said was, “I’m sorry, Kade. One day you’ll understand. One day it will all make sense.”
And he’d sworn then and there that he’d never let something that couldn’t even be explained destroy a family. It wasn’t worth it. It would never be worth it.
Ella.
Was she worth it?
His body and soul screamed one answer. His mind, another.
“Did you pick her because of me?” Kade turned and asked Axel.
“Who?”
“Ella,” he said simply. “Did you pick her to try to mate me to her?”
Axel shook his head. His eyes were clear and didn’t look away. “No,” he said, and Kade knew he wasn’t lying. “I picked her because she was the only one who answered the ad who had experience cooking for large groups and didn’t sound crazy. Believe it or not, cooking at a remote mountain lodge isn’t high on a lot of people’s list of things to do.”
Kade nodded, satisfied with his brother’s answer.
“But I will tell you this,” Axel added. “I didn’t know for sure, but I got the sense when I spoke with her that she was a shifter. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I wasn’t hopeful that you’d get along with her. But I’ll tell you what…I never could have dreamed it would go so well. I never would have guessed you’d be fated.”
“We’re not.”
“Whatever. Just do me a favor, okay?”
Begrudgingly, Kade nodded.
“Don’t fight it. At least not too hard.”
“I’m so sorry it’s not the most luxurious accommodation,” Harper apologized for at least the tenth time. “But we have quite a few bookings from now until the spring, so we can’t give you one of the guest rooms to stay in. As soon as the snow melts, the guys will get to work building you your own cabin.”
“If they need to.”
Harper glanced sharply at Chloe, who just giggled. Gabriella knew exactly why they thought it was so funny. She had to admit, she thought it was pretty funny that they were going to so much trouble to set her up in the little storage room where they’d shoved a single bed and a dresser. It’s not that she objected to the surroundings at all. She was fine to sleep wherever. But the reality was, she didn’t plan to spend any time there.
Heck, if she was right about Kade, she wouldn’t even be spending one night in the little storage room.
“Something tells me they won’t need to bother,” Gabriella said and the other women’s mouths dropped open. “Oh, don’t pretend to be shocked,” she said. “You both just finished telling me that you think Kade and I are fated, and I think so, too. So don’t be so surprised that I’m ready to embrace it.”
And she was. Where she came from, there was no need to dance around the subject. If two people felt they were fated, they acted on it. There was no waiting period or courting or whatever other North American ideas of waiting for an acceptable time frame had passed. They just moved forward. And that’s exactly what Gabriella intended to do.
The others may not see it, or even believe that Kade was capable of taking a mate, but she saw it. Kade was capable. More than capable. And she would prove it.
“We did say that,” Harper said. “But Kade isn’t like the others. He’s…”
“Sensitive.”
“Sensitive?” Gabriella directed her question to Chloe. “Well, sensitive or not, I plan on discovering everything I need to about him. And then some. He’s my mate. I know it. And he does, too.”
“He does?”
“He does.”
“Well, I wish you luck with him,” Harper said. “I really do. I love Kade, and I think I can speak for all of us when I say that we just want to see him happy. He’s denied his true self for so long, it’s really starting to take a toll on him.”
Her comment caught Gabriella off guard. She put her bag down on the bed and sat next to it. “What do you mean? He’s denied his true self?”
“He won’t shift,” Chloe said. “It’s killing him, I think. If not killing him, it’s making him crazy. Grizzlies need an outlet. He needs to shift, to ru
n his bear, to…mate. The longer he goes without it, the harder it is on him.”
“You’re not a grizzly?”
Chloe shook her head. “I’m a black bear. I still need to shift, but it’s not a consuming need like it is for the grizzlies. What about you? What’s it like for you? I’m sorry to say I really don’t know anything about bespectacled bears or your clans or anything. I don’t really keep up with that side of the life.”
“Don’t worry.” Gabriella laughed to cover her nervousness. It was definitely a good thing if they didn’t know anything about her clan. “I obviously don’t know anything about any other species. I’ve had kind of a sheltered life, to be totally honest.” If she could stay as close to the truth as possible, she’d be fine. With the exception of the few very huge lies she’d told these nice people.
But the one thing she wasn’t lying about was her feelings toward Kade. That was real. That was very real.
“To be honest, I haven’t shifted in years. It’s kind of discouraged in my clan. At least for females.”
“No way!” That was Harper. She’d been reclining against the door, looking as if she might fall asleep, but that piece of news woke her up and caught her attention. “How could you not shift? It’s the best thing. I can’t believe I’d gone my whole life without it.”
“So you can—”
Harper nodded excitedly. “I can. I didn’t think I could, but I can and I love it. I thought the first time was the best, but I was wrong. It just gets better and better. To be able to run like that…totally free without any restrictions on you or—”
“Expectations,” Chloe chimed in. “It is pretty remarkable. And we have the most beautiful country here. The ridge is like nothing you’ve ever seen, Ella. You have to check it out.”
“Oh…I will. I mean, I want to. And I guess as soon as the snow—”
“Oh, no,” Chloe interrupted her. “You have to go in the snow.”
“I’m not really prepared for the snow.” She gestured to her jacket that she’d hung on the hook on the wall. “I thought it would be warm enough, but it’s really not. I guess I’ll have to go down to town when I get a chance and buy some—”
“That’s not what we mean.” Harper smiled. “You need to go with your bear. You have to experience it that way.”
Shift? There was no way she could do that. Or could she? Why not?
“I guess…I mean…” Both women looked at her expectantly, so she just spat it out. “Okay,” she said. “Why not.” She wiggled her arm. “And my arm feels better, so…can we go now?”
Chloe and Harper exchanged a glance. “I don’t see why not,” Chloe said.
“I’m so jealous.”
“You’re not coming, Harper?”
She shook her head and her hands went to her belly. “We don’t think it’s a very good idea while I’m pregnant. I’m only half shifter, and it takes a lot out of me when I do shift. Never mind how tired I am already. Carrying a cub is exhausting.”
“I can imagine,” Gabriella said, although she couldn’t. On some level, she always thought she’d have cubs one day, but after she’d met Carlos and really discovered what kind of man he was, she’d taken steps to ensure she wouldn’t get pregnant. And she wouldn’t. Not as long as she took the herbs the medicine woman two villages over had given her. A warm glow moved through her as she realized that would no longer be a problem.
She was free.
Free from Carlos, his abuse, and a future that was anything but what she wanted. She hadn’t had much time to process everything. She’d been too busy running and traveling and then there was the crash. But now that she was actually in Montana and at the ridge surrounded by such nice people, Gabriella could finally breathe.
She’d done it. She’d really done it. And it was better than she ever could have imagined. Especially considering not only had she found her freedom, she’d found her mate.
Gabriella felt bad that Harper couldn’t join them, but she was so nervous about actually shifting, she couldn’t dwell on it. Instead, she tried to remember how it had felt the last time she’d shifted into her bear. It was a long time ago, and she had trouble remembering the mechanics of it, but she could still very vividly remember the sensations that came once she’d shifted. Just…the feeling of freedom. As if nothing could hold her back or contain her. It was so hard to explain or put into words, but as she followed Chloe outside, every fiber of her body twitched and got prepared for the euphoria that was about to flood her.
“It’s freezing out here.” Gabriella wrapped her arms around her body and tried to control the shiver. From what she’d seen so far, Montana was beautiful, but it was also ridiculously cold. Never before had she experienced the kind of bone-deep cold she’d felt since she’d been in the mountains.
“I know. It’s part of the problem with shifting in the wintertime.” Chloe led the way through a packed trail toward a small cabin. “But it’ll be worth it. I promise.” She glanced backward at Gabriella and her face scrunched into a frown. “Are you okay? You look like you’re going to shiver right out of your skin.”
“I’ll be fine.” She managed to squeeze the words out between the clatter of her teeth. “Are we almost there?”
Chloe had told her they’d go to her cabin where they could leave their clothes on the porch and shift right into the trees, to avoid being spotted. It hadn’t looked far from the back door of the kitchen, but Gabriella was quickly learning that even three minutes outside in the cold was three too many.
“It’s right here. Come on.” Chloe led the way up onto a porch and immediately took off layers. “Are you ready?”
“Absolutely.” Without hesitation, Gabriella did the same and right after Chloe leapt off the porch, shifting into a sleek black bear, Gabriella closed her eyes and called on her bear. It had been so long, she wasn’t sure her animal would respond right away, but she did.
Soon, the vibrations started; her core temperature rose and then…
Gabriella jumped off the porch in the direction Chloe had disappeared and felt her body transform. The second her paws hit the ground, she took off running. Her muscles stretched and reached for each step. Just as she anticipated, a fierce sense of freedom rushed through her, flooding her senses and filling her with a happiness she hadn’t felt in years. Maybe ever.
She pushed her body, following the prints Chloe left; her paws sunk in the snow with every step. The icy slush covered her paws, leaving little stings and prickles on her pads. It was cold, but not painfully so. Not like before. With her fur, the snow slid off and cooled the heat of her body, making the winter air tolerable.
Chloe’s tracks veered to the left. Gabriella followed and when the trees cleared, what she saw next took her breath away. She sat down hard and stared at the view in front of her. It was like nothing she’d seen before. Breathtaking wasn’t even close to an appropriate word to describe it.
The trees opened up and exposed the view of the valley below. Towering snow-covered mountains surrounded them on all sides, and the ridge ran up to what looked like the top of the world. When she sat, it felt as if she could see the entire world from that one little spot.
It took Gabriella a few minutes to realize she wasn’t alone. She swung her head around to see Chloe sitting next to her. She’d never seen a black bear in real life before. The only bears she’d ever seen were from her own clan, and even then, only the males. Chloe was beautiful. Her fur was so dark and shiny, it sparkled almost blue in the winter sun. She was a lot larger than Gabriella, but not nearly as big as she could imagine a grizzly was.
As Kade would be in his bear form.
The thought sent a shiver through her that seconds later turned into heat. She wanted him. Badly. She’d been so suppressed her entire life, she’d never felt the way she was feeling about a man before. But maybe that had less to do with her life and more to do with the fact that she just hadn’t met Kade yet.
Either way, now that she had laid eyes on him,
she was definitely not in a hurry to let him go. Quite the opposite, in fact. Gabriella had never thought of herself as a particularly forward person, but she also wasn’t a shrinking violet. If there was something she wanted, she’d go after it. And now, in Montana, she was damned well going to make this new life everything she’d always dreamed about.
She surveyed her surroundings, her companion, herself. Hell, if she could shift and embrace her bear again, she could also embrace every other thing being a bear had to offer.
Including a fated mate.
She shivered again at the thought. It felt right. Very right. Maybe the girls thought Kade didn’t believe in the idea of fated mates, but she could see the truth. And even if he did need a little bit of convincing, she was definitely the woman for the job.
Chloe nudged her, and made a grumble deep in her throat.
Time to go.
With another look out at the ridge, Gabriella reluctantly turned and followed her new friend back into the woods and in the direction of the lodge. The return trip didn’t take long, which turned out to be a good thing since Gabriella could feel herself getting tired. And, admittedly, a little cold. Certainly the fur helped ward off the cold, but she had to remember she was a South American bear. She wasn’t built for such cold temperatures. That would definitely be an adjustment.
She watched as Chloe jumped easily onto the porch, shifted seamlessly and disappeared into the cabin. Just like that, in the open. Of course, they’d said there were no guests on the ridge at the moment; otherwise, they would be a lot more secretive about the shifting. But as it was, it was only family. The Jackson family. And that meant, Axel and Harper, and Chloe’s mate, Luke. And of course…Kade.
As if the mere thought of him had conjured him, she felt his eyes watching her; she sniffed the air and her head filled with his scent. She turned her head up the path, toward the last cabin. He was watching her. He knew she’d have to shift and he was waiting.
Another chill ran through her. She’d have to shift soon.
