27
Zellendine
Knocking on Briar’s door, coming here at all, she knew was a risk. But he wasn’t going to attack her in front of his dads. And she needed to know if it was just him, or if their whole family didn’t want her around anymore.
The door swung open and Journo’s smile dropped into soft eyes and a sympathetic frown as he shook his head.
“Oh, Zellendine, I’m so sorry about Stephen, he is a very special man and will be sorely missed.”
She bit her lip and nodded, tasting a trickle of blood she bit down so hard, but it helped to keep from crying. Journo managed to give his condolences in the perfect Chapter way, looking forward to the times her dad wasn’t going to be there, but she wanted to yell, was. Her dad was a very special man. The present tense around him made it hurt even worse. In reality there was never going to be a present for him again.
“Thank you. How is Upton doing?” Her voice managed to remain steady, even if it was devoid of feeling. That was the best she could do.
“Much better actually. Your treatment did wonders, but you can wait if you want to do further treatment. He seems to be doing well, and I know you may need some time.”
“Yes, that may be true. But you don’t want me to stop checking up on him entirely, right?” It was an awkward question, but she needed a direct answer, not one that would leave doubt in her mind.
“Of course we want you to keep treating him. Look how much better he is already. Hey, come in really quick and see him. I think that would make you feel better.” Journo swung the door further open and she stepped inside, nodding at him as she passed.
Upton was sitting at the table, a holo in front of him with work she recognized from her days learning at his age.
“Hey, Buddy. How are you feeling?” she asked, standing next to him and taking in his improved coloring and the fact he was out of bed and seemed to not need to be buried in blankets anymore. That was already an improvement.
“I’m better, but…” he stopped what he was doing and looked up at her, his little face full of sympathy and pain, water building in his eyes. “How are you?”
“Better now that I can see you’re doing well. I’m sorry I didn’t come for a little bit. I, um, well, there were things I had to do. But I think I’ll be back in a few days again, to check on you. Would that be okay?”
He nodded, the threat of tears gone and she smiled.
“Zellendine.” His voice took on a haunting timber, his eyes unfocused and stared into the middle between them, he was a thousand light years away again. “Be careful. It wants all of you who can’t be one, dead. You don’t belong here.”
She felt all the hairs on her arms stand, her heart thudded in her chest and her stomach flipped over.
“What wants me dead?” She asked, her throat dry and the words sticking in it as she did.
“Everything.”
Journo jumped forward and touched his son’s shoulder. Upton collapsed into his arms, blinking and sweating.
He looked up at Zellendine and a tear did fall then.
“I’m sorry,” he said, then he shivered. “I’m cold, Dad.”
“Zellendine, I think maybe we should have a different medic look out for him from now on,” Journo said, his voice hard.
She couldn’t speak. She definitely couldn’t argue, she just nodded and left.
At least he knew what he had to do to get Upton warm again. But she had no idea how to explain to him that it wasn’t her influence that had done this to his son. It had to be the silver in his eye.
But that still didn’t explain where the silver was coming from, or why he said everything wanted her dead. Or who he meant when he said, all of you who can’t be one.
She walked down the hall, not realizing until she was halfway to the other side of the ship, that she had no where to go.
28
Troylus
Rullon was right. He slammed shut the door of their quarters, needing to be anywhere but there, faced with how right he was.
Leadership was going to try and pin Stephen’s murder on him. And he had no idea how to stop them.
There wouldn’t be a last minute save at a trial for him. It didn’t matter that Zellendine knew he didn’t do it. It didn’t matter that Rullon knew, or anyone else. He didn’t have a good answer to where he was or even why he was in that corridor when she found the body.
Even if he had a good answer, there was no reason to think they wouldn’t have done the same to him anyway.
If he had known his own standing up for Zellendine during her trial would have put a target on his back, he still would have done it, but maybe he could have done other things differently to make it less likely. Maybe.
He rubbed his hands over his face and through his hair, not caring that one of his elbows caught someone’s arm as he stormed through the crowds in the halls.
Where could he even go to get away from everyone to think through it all?
Of all the places that flashed in his head, the orchard was the only option he thought might have a chance to be empty enough to suit his needs.
Fine, the orchard was the first place he would try.
Damn it. He wanted to find Zellendine. He wanted to lock himself away with her in their quarters and hope they would be able to wait out whatever bullshit inquiry that leadership was running.
The orchard was quiet. At least it was always that. Even when there were people tucked in and amongst the trees, everyone had the decency to stay quiet and calm. Or maybe it was the trees that inspired people to be as still as possible.
It didn’t matter if it was caused by the people or by the environment, it was still his favorite place onboard.
He wandered between the trees, seeing few people, which let his heart slow, his fists unclench, and his stomach undo the knots in it.
Rounding a trunk of a tree, heading into the little clearing he thought of as his own, a bird glided by in front of him.
Everything about it made him want to sit down and wait until he saw another one, but he continued on, hoping his clearing would give him even more chances to see birds. If he was lucky, another pair might have even built another nest.
Of all the things that had happened onboard the ship in the last shift and this one, the birds nesting were one of the best.
Zellendine sat below the tree that used to hold the baby birds, a holo in her hands, her fingers tapping away, while she chewed on her lip.
He moved into the clearing and neared her side, but she still didn’t notice his presence.
It wasn’t until he sat down beside her that her head popped up, her eyes widening, a wavering smile forming on her face.
She dropped the holo into her lap and flung her arms around his neck.
“Are you okay?” he asked, hugging her back.
Not that he was complaining, but it wasn’t like her to be so eager to hang onto him. And with what she had been going through, he hoped she wasn’t reliving something to freshen her grief.
“Troylus,” she said. Just his name.
It hit the part of him that wanted to hide from leadership, the part of him that wanted to pretend everything was going to be fine. It made all his deepest emotions as tender as they had ever been and he buried his face in her hair, hugging her tighter.
She squeaked, a sharp, quick sound of pain.
He pulled back from her and barely touched her arms as he held her out from him. His eyes looked over every part of her he could see, but there was no obvious sign of injury.
“What’s wrong?”
“I…” she trailed off, looking down at where her hands dropped into her lap. “I went to see the room where he died.”
Equal parts fury and a desperate need to make it better raged in him as she told him about Briar attacking her.
“Zellendine, listen, I know you don’t want to do anything about this, but you need to tell leadership,” he said when she was done as he ran a hand along her cheek.
“But they might keep him onboard, not let him colonize. This isn’t entirely his fault. It’s whatever is happening to him from the ability showing up. You know that.” Her eyes were begging him to let it go, to just accept that her decision was to protect Briar, but he couldn’t.
“No, it is his fault. Even with the ability doing what it does, he still has a choice in how he responds to it. I didn’t hit you, even when it was making me furious with you. I tried to shove all that away.” She shook her head, and he couldn’t even blame her. He had made excuses for the way he treated her. He was the reason she was so willing to forgive Briar. He had overcome it, so she was hoping Briar would too.
He tucked her, gently, into his chest, his chin resting on her head and his arms around her.
There was no phenomenon in the universe that he could think of that would make him hurt her the way Briar had. And he wanted to kill Briar for it. For a minute, he was more than willing to be the kind of person leadership thought he was.
“I just want to pretend he doesn’t exist,” she mumbled.
Did he hear her right?
Tilting her chin up with his hand, pulling his head back so he could look into her eyes, he waited for her to take it back.
“Are you serious?” His voice was rough. Low and soft, but rough, because his out of control heart beat was back and he ached for her to mean what he thought she meant.
One corner of her mouth turned up and she looked down at his lips before she leaned in and kissed him.
The emotions ricocheting through his body took conscious effort to keep from flying out of his hands in his blue light. But he held them back, until she deepened the kiss and climbed onto his lap.
“Wait,” he said, leaving her lips behind and putting his forehead to hers.
She laughed, a tiny giggle.
“I’m sorry, I got carried away.”
“No,” he said, looking at her and shaking his head, a wide ridiculous smile on his face. “Don’t be sorry, I am that I don’t have control of this stupid blue light yet.”
She nodded, but she broke eye contact and he couldn’t help but kick himself that he couldn’t just be normal.
“Zellendine,” he said, his throat dry, one hand reaching up to cup her cheek, “If I didn’t have this damn ability I would carry you back to quarters right now.”
Her dark brown eyes crinkled at the corners, mischievous glee dancing in their depths.
“We share quarters,” she said.
“Yes,” he said, carefully. Oh, so carefully, because if she said too much he might just explode in blue light without her lips on his.
“Maybe we should try to see how much control you have.”
They met each other, she didn’t kiss him, and he didn’t kiss her, they kissed each other in their perfect little clearing.
They kissed until someone hit Troylus in the back with a thick branch.
29
Zellendine
“No, Briar, stop it,” Zellendine yelled, jumping up from Troylus and grabbing at the branch in Briar’s hands.
He stared at her over the length of the wood, it’s rough bark digging into her palms as he tried to wrench it away from her.
“You fucking bitch,” he said, his voice little more than a growl.
“Ahhh,” Troylus groaned, crawling away from Briar, his head hanging.
“What the fuck is wrong with you? You just attacked your best friend,” she yelled, yanking on the wood and finally pulling it away from him.
“Wrong with me? You’re the one coming between us, you. It’s all you, destroying everything.” Briar balled his hands into fists, closed his eyes, and sucked down air through his nose, his teeth bared and clenched.
“Briar, fuck off. Just go,” she said, trying not to take her eyes off of Briar as Troylus leaned against a tree trunk, touching his back over one shoulder, grimacing as he did.
“I don’t need to listen to you,” Briar yelled, his eyes popping open and his hands opening and closing on fists.
“You don’t have to, but you should.” Troylus said, shoving himself up to standing, keeping a hand on the tree.
His every move looked like it hurt, but his face said he didn’t care and was more than willing to punch Briar in the face.
“Come on, Troylus. You hate her. Don’t let her get to you.” Briar turned to face Troylus, his face changing completely in the process, as if he was a switch that flipped when he wasn’t looking at her.
“I have never hated her, and I sure as hell don’t now. You don’t even know her,” Troylus said, pushing off from the tree and coming to stand just in front of Zellendine, his hands out at his sides, wide open.
She looked back and forth between them, watching as they said nothing but their hands said everything.
Troylus was ready. His hands, where the blue light came from, were prepared to do whatever he needed.
Briar was still closing and opening his, like confusion was flaring inside him and his hands were responding.
“He doesn’t want to hurt us,” she said, her voice low, but Briar’s head snapped to look at her.
She tightened her grip on the branch, raising it into place in case she needed to swing it at him. He sneered.
“Yes, I want to hurt you, just not Troylus. Unless…” Briar turned his gaze back to Troylus standing next to her, his eyes narrowing and his hands flaring open. “Unless you’re gone to her side.”
“I will always be on her side,” Troylus said, raising his hands out in front of him as if he was going to throw the blue light at Briar right that second.
“She isn’t one of us. She needs to die.” Briar’s voice was high and warbled in pitch, like he was losing control.
“Come on, Troylus. Let’s just go,” she said, using one hand to pull on the sleeve of his uniform while she kept the branch aloft with the other.
“No. He needs to get his ass kicked or he’ll keep coming after you.” Troylus sounded like they were talking about what they were going to eat that night, but the meaning of his words hit her anyway. She didn’t think he was wrong.
“You want her dead, you’ll have to kill me first.” Troylus took a step closer to Briar who stumbled as he stepped back.
“No, I can’t use it on you,” Briar said, taking one last hate filled look at Zellendine and then darting back into the trees. The sound of his retreat bounced off of the woods around them, assuring her he was actually leaving.
Zellendine threw the branch and wiped her palms on her uniform.
“I need to go after him,” Troylus said, turning back to her, one of his hands over his shoulder again and slumping as he looked at her.
“What you need, is to come with me to quarters where I can look at how bad your back is.” She took his hand and led him through the orchard.
He followed along willingly, but she was sure he felt the tension running through her.
It wasn’t even from the threats, or Briar’s attack, it was from how similar his statement about her not being one of them and needing to die was to the cryptic things Upton said.
Abilities were one thing, no matter how fantastic, even abilities tied to emotions that caused some major conflict issues, including among people you knew and loved. But some kind of mandate that those who were different needed to be killed?
She wasn’t ready to process all the implications of her being a target of the ugliest of the side effects of whatever was happening.
But she didn’t have much of a choice. Briar, maybe more than Briar, wanted her dead. And someone had already killed her dad.
Troylus rubbed a thumb over the back of her hand as they moved through the masses in the halls, it was enough to remind her not to panic. She had a very powerful person on her side. And his blue light.
30
Troylus
By the time they reached quarters, there was blood trickling down his back from the place on his shoulder blade where Briar’s damn stick had gouged him.
The at
tack was going to leave bruises, and it had knocked the wind out of him, but the blood was really going to piss him off.
He watched as Zellendine shut their door behind him and all he wanted to do was take her in his arms and test out his control. But she was never going to let that happen as long as he was bleeding.
“Fuck Briar,” he said, and Zellendine laughed a humorless laugh before putting her hands over her face.
“Just so we’re one hundred percent clear, because I don’t want you to believe whatever sick shit he says about me,” she started, pulling her hands from her face and looking right at him, “I was never going to partner with anyone until I knew for sure.”
He laughed and rubbed the hand of his good shoulder roughly through his hair.
“Yeah, and you were sure about him. I get it,” he said, backing up to the table and plopping down onto a chair.
“Don’t worry, Zellendine. I know you two have been together for a long time and I shouldn’t have tried to get between you for long. I’m sure he’ll get over it like I did.” He closed his eyes and rubbed at the back of his neck and the knot forming there. He was lying his ass off, and he didn’t want her to know.
He opened his eyes and she was inches from his face, one of her brows high and her hands on her hips, bent at the waist, leaning over him.
“Shit,” he mumbled, sitting back and pulling his face from hers.
“Will you stop being a fucking moron.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him to his feet, dragging him behind her to the wet room.
“Listen,” she said, undoing the top of his uniform.
“Hey,” he said, twisting away from her deft fingers.
“No. This is my assignment. I need to see it.” She turned him back to her and he dropped his hands. Yes, she was a medic, and he needed one, no matter what it was doing to him to have her undressing him.
The Spindle Page 10
