by Stead, Nick
My second visit to the games room didn’t end nearly as well.
“Hey, dude, are you new here?” a boy my age asked.
I eyed him warily, searching for any hint of a threat.
“I’m Richard.” He held out his hand, hurt passing over his features when I didn’t take it. But it only took a minute or so for him to brighten again. “Fancy a game of chess?”
“Go on, Nick,” a nurse encouraged. “It’ll do you good to have some fun.”
It didn’t look like they were giving me much choice, so I sat.
“One of the knights is missing,” Richard said. “But I found this guy to replace him. Look, it’s a wolf. Cooler than a horse, huh?”
Mel appeared behind him with her mangled throat and torn face, and I snapped.
“No!” I roared, swiping at the board and knocking all the pieces to the floor. “Wolves are not cool you fucking idiot – haven’t you seen what the monster in this town’s been doing to people?”
“What are you doing?” Richard jumped to his feet and made a grab for the pieces. “You’re not cool, man.”
“And what do you know? You’ve no idea what I’m going through. None of you have!”
“Oh, ’cause you’re the only one in here who’s got problems?” Richard sneered, looking up at me from the floor, most of the pieces clutched in his hands now.
With another roar, I lunged for him, to do what I don’t know. But the hospital staff were on me before I could grab him, pulling me back and fighting to take me to a room where I could calm down.
It took a group of them to drag me away. They didn’t take me back to my room or attempt to restrain me on the bed again though. Instead, I was pushed through the doorway to somewhere new, where I could scream and rage all I wanted without hurting the others.
And so I found myself in the Seclusion Room, which was the infamous padded cell. But there was no straitjacket to restrain me. Maybe because they couldn’t force me into one with my inhuman strength, all the more potent in my madness.
At first I was violent, banging against the walls and door in an attempt to escape and ripping padding to shreds with nails turned to claws. Eventually the violence gave way to more fear when another victim appeared in there with me, and I fell to the floor, drawing myself into a tight ball where I whimpered and shook, like I had in the bathroom back at home. When the staff were satisfied I’d calmed, they let me back into my room. Then it was back to lying on the bed, fighting sleep and the nightmares.
Doctors spent a lot of time trying to get me to talk and work through my problems. It was evident I needed help and they all thought they could give it to me. Shame I was beyond that. Whenever I recognised them for what they were, rather than a vengeful victim back from the dead or a Slayer out to kill me, I just found something to fix my eyes on and stared at it until they left. Sometimes I’d grunt at them if they gave me a question that required a one word answer. For the most part I screamed through the horrific hallucinations, and I even attacked a few. The next thing I knew I was back in the Seclusion Room, screaming at more enemies conjured by my mind. And still they sought to tame me. I’ve no idea how long it went on for, but it must have been less than a fortnight because we hadn’t reached full moon yet.
My family visited every day. I treated them like anyone else. Like with the doctors, if I recognised them I either ignored them or grunted. Mum begged me to let the doctors help so I could come home again. Dad said little. They didn’t let Amy come most times, scared of what she might see.
Every day I spent there I lived in fear. What would happen next full moon when the wolf found itself in this building, surrounded by prey? There were about thirty patients in residence, plus all the doctors and nurses. It would be a feast the wolf couldn’t refuse, like a fox in a henhouse. And there would be nothing I could do about it.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
The Mating Season
As it turned out, the next full moon was the least of my worries. We were now in February, the start of the mating season of the grey wolf. And the mating season for werewolves too, apparently.
I don’t know when it was I first noticed, but I would guess it had only been a week since I’d been admitted to the hospital. But that’s only a guess. Days and weeks had lost their meaning after the appeal from Mel’s parents and it was all just one continual block of time. Day and night became one. It was hard to differentiate between the two when I was lost in a dark part of my mind where not even the light of the sun could penetrate.
Another female nurse came into my room with more food. She was in her late twenties, her face kindly and fairly pretty. But it was her body I was interested in, her natural scent more powerful than any brand of perfume she could have worn. My eyes tracked her as she set the tray of food by my bedside and walked out again. I followed, mindless with lust.
We were in another patient’s bedroom before I realised what I was doing. My cheeks burned with embarrassment, and I ran back to my room, wondering what it meant. Sex might have been a regular urge in my teens but I’d never done anything like that before, and I hadn’t given it any thought at all since Fiona’s death. The constant state of depression suppressed any such desires.
But suddenly I found I could think of little else. As if I didn’t have enough to deal with. I would have found it funny before all this began, thinking it just a new kind of insanity, but I knew it was more serious than it sounds. With a jolt, I realised I’d been ready to rape the woman. If I couldn’t control myself I was going to be in even more trouble.
Maybe I should give into the urge and find a willing partner? There was a good chance the instinct would die down, though it was far from guaranteed. For all I knew, these feelings could persist throughout the entire mating season. And even if the act of mating could help lessen my urges, I refused to give in to the beast. It had killed Fiona. I wasn’t going to make anything easy for it after that. I was better than the wolf. I was stronger. It wouldn’t rule me. Besides, it was pretty sick that the monster considered humans as both prey and potential mates. I assumed that meant they could bear its children, something I couldn’t allow. I didn’t want to think about how many people would die if there were more of us roaming the streets.
My willpower grew weaker by the day as the lupine instincts grew stronger. The moon was practically full again when it reached its climax and there was little I could do to fight it. I might have remained human in form, but as the lupine instincts became more powerful, I became more bestial. It was like the wolf had taken over my mind and there wasn’t any human left. Some small part of me knew we were still separate, but the human half was becoming more like the wolf every day, until the human was dead and only wolf remained.
In the first couple of days it was little things that showed signs of animalistic behaviour. I grew hostile towards other males, shouting at them if they came too close. I had the urge to follow females around, particularly the nurse it had all started with, though I fought it before things could go any further. As the week wore on, the shouting turned to snarling. Words made little sense anymore. I paced my room and pissed up the walls to mark my territory as I lost the last of my self-control, and then before I knew it, I was wandering the hospital looking for a female in season. There weren’t any. A couple were just coming out of heat, and a couple just coming into heat, but somehow I knew they weren’t at the right stage yet to be sure of a pregnancy. So I broke out through the window.
It was easier than it should have been. The glass wasn’t strong enough to withstand a blow from a werewolf, and long before anyone would find I was missing, I was loose on the streets.
Dusk came before I found what I was looking for. The scent was fresh, and I tracked her to a nightclub. I stepped inside but the scent became confused with so many others, and the music was as painful a beat to my ears then as it had been in wolf form. I howled in frustration, but the animal sound was lost in the noise, and with a snarl I backed away, waiting outside.
<
br /> Hours passed and finally she emerged, alone. She was beautiful – curves in all the right places, her smooth blonde hair flowing down her back like water and spilling around her shoulders and onto her breasts, blue sapphire eyes gleaming in the night.
I advanced, growling with anticipation. She heard me coming and looked round, grinning when she saw me – probably used to boys approaching her all the time. I liked the show of confidence. This was no submissive, low ranking female. No, she was strong and healthy – the perfect mate.
The girl spoke and I came to a stop, frowning as I tried to make sense of her words. Failing, I growled again. She just laughed, before moving in for a kiss. I responded with a playful snap, when suddenly she drew back, a male voice calling out something behind us.
“My boyfriend…” she gestured.
Though I didn’t understand the words, I knew the meaning behind them and snarled, preparing for a fight as a boy advanced towards me, older and more muscular than I was, and full of anger.
“That’s my girl, buddy, so you can back off,” he said, invading my personal space and glaring.
I took a moment to size him up, giving no warning when I struck first. Pain shot through my fist as it connected with his nose, and he fell to the floor with a cry of surprise while I stood over him, snarling and waiting for him to submit. The girl merely watched with interest, unconcerned by the violence. I liked that too.
But the guy showed no signs of submitting. He was quick to pick himself up, his nose a bloody mess, and I allowed it, happy to put on more of a show for the female I’d chosen.
We circled each other, then his fist shot towards my own nose. I blocked it with my arm and retaliated with another punch to his cheek, the force sending him back to the ground. Then I was crouching over him, pinning him down with my jaws around his throat.
All traces of anger froze, and in an instant he turned from challenger to prey, his heart fluttering with fear. My mouth watered as my other hunger rose, while he squirmed and tried to wriggle free.
“You’re insane! What do you want from me?” he screamed.
His voicebox bounced against my tongue and the feel of his pulse sent a shiver through me. But he chose that moment to look towards his girlfriend for help, tilting his head to the side and exposing more of his throat and underbelly, a sign of submission to my lupine instincts. It saved his life. My mind switched tracks again and I stood.
The guy ran off, his girlfriend forgotten. She didn’t seem worried, an amused look in her eye as she linked arms with me and steered us back to her empty home. Then we were alone, in her bedroom…
Wolves can remain ‘tied’ for up to thirty minutes. It didn’t last that long.
I nearly lost myself in the pleasure, struggling to keep my human shape as my fangs sank into skin and I tasted blood, while she moaned beneath me. But she had nothing to fear from my teeth.
When we’d finished, the instinct to mate was satisfied and I rolled off, lying on my back while my mind calmed and I gradually regained what little humanity I had left. The bed was soft and warm but I instantly knew it was not my bed. Where was I? I’d been in the hospital, I remembered that, but the past few days were hazy.
I stared up at an unfamiliar ceiling and took in the creamy walls covered with posters of boy bands and movie stars. Then I felt an arm tracing the lines of my stomach and I looked across at the girl I was in bed with. Fuck!
I bolted upright and grabbed my clothes.
“And where do you think you’re going?” the girl teased.
“I have to get home before my parents find me missing.” It was the first thing that popped into my head.
“Surely they won’t miss you for one night?”
“You don’t know my parents.”
“Stay, please. I don’t want to spend the rest of the night alone.”
Her hand reached for mine but I dodged it and fled the house, before the wolf could make me do anything else I was going to regret. But where did I go from there? I had no desire to return to the hospital now I was free of the place and besides, the moon would soon be full and I’d only escape again. People would die, regardless of where I was. No, I wanted to be back home.
Mum was shocked when I turned up on the doorstep.
“Nick, what are you doing here? Why aren’t you at the hospital?”
“Don’t make me go back there, Mum; please? I’m okay now, I promise.”
She looked like she was going to argue but she let me in. Mostly I think she was just pleased to have me home. Dad wasn’t. Either he didn’t think I was ready to come home or he didn’t want me back. I didn’t give a damn either way. I wasn’t going back to the hospital and a mere mortal like him couldn’t make me.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
A New Crisis
“Nick, you’re back!” Becci said, beaming at the sight of me.
“Did you miss me?”
“Of course. Who else can I talk weird shit to?”
I forced a laugh as I took my seat, but my heart wasn’t in it.
“Hey, loony!” a boy shouted. “Loony! Is it true you’ve been locked up in an asylum?”
I ignored him, rummaging in my bag for my planner and my pencil case. He tried shouting again, and then he was standing by the table, looking down at me.
“What was it like? Did they lock you in a straitjacket?” He mimed being strapped up and the class laughed, even Becci.
My eyes met his and I made no effort to hide the darkness in them. He gasped and backed away, the fear I’d put in my classmates still alive and well it seemed. That brought a smirk to my lips.
Ms Brooks entered the room. “Settle down, class. We’ve lots to get through in Form today.”
“Oh great, my first day back and already there’s lots to get through,” I grumbled to Becci.
“Don’t worry, it’ll just be some bollocks about updates to school policies and upcoming assemblies, you watch.”
But that bollocks also included an announcement that our TB jabs would be coming up soon.
“I’m not going to tell you what date,” Ms Brooks said. “Because knowing you lot, you’ll all come down with some convenient sickness the night before so you don’t have to have it. This announcement is just to let you know your jabs are coming up, and there’s a letter here for your parents.”
I groaned.
“What’s up?” Becci asked.
“You know I hate needles.”
But the injection would prove to be the least of my problems.
February became March and people died during the full moon as I’d known they would, but more disturbing was the fact that the horror seemed to have lessened slightly. It was still there, but numbed a little, as if I’d taken a painkiller that wasn’t very effective – something just to take the edge off, but not strong enough to completely nullify it.
Then the day of the injection came, and we were sent to the hall. There were forms to fill in as we queued outside, the pen shaking in my hand as I worked through it. My stomach writhed with nerves, the thought of the discomfort the needle would cause filling me with anxiety. It was crazy really. Given the pain I endured each time I shifted, an injection should have been nothing. But I’ve never been good with needles.
I entered the hall and saw a nurse beckoning me over from behind a desk. With great reluctance, I took my seat beside her, eyeing her supply of plasters and things with distaste. I tried not to look too closely at the pile of packets containing the needles. It would only make me feel worse.
“Now then, love, just a few questions and a sharp scratch, then it will all be over and done with and you can go back to your lessons. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Any allergies?”
“No.”
“Do you smoke?”
“No.”
“Do you take drugs?”
“No.”
There was a list she worked through, checking each one off as I answered. Then came the moment where she r
olled up my sleeve.
This was always the hardest part. No matter how hard I tried not to look, I always ended up watching, and even before the needle touched my skin I would end up fighting. Usually I’d win, my fear giving me strength, unless a couple of people held me down. But I had more than fear aiding me this time, and I knew I couldn’t afford to make a scene. So I took a deep breath and looked away, doing my best to relax.
Her hand gripped my arm and I sensed her bringing the syringe closer, my eyes drawn towards it. The needle glinted in the morning light and I could already feel it sliding under my skin, its contents being forced into my veins. And the worst bit – the unpleasant feeling that the needle was still stuck in there after it had been withdrawn, though I knew it would really be the liquid vaccine taking its time to disperse through my blood.
I was determined to be still for when the tip pierced my flesh, but I guess the wolf didn’t like needles either. It also knew what was coming, and the combined fear almost drove me mad again.
With an animal cry, I tore my arm from the nurse’s grasp and pushed her backwards. She screamed as she fell to the floor, the needle embedding deep in her thigh. The fall caused it to snap, leaving most of its length stuck in the muscle. I swore, realising what I’d done, and ran from the room to more catcalls of “Loony!” and the like.
Out in the corridor, I leant against the wall and shut my eyes, still shaking and panting uncontrollably. Footsteps caught my attention. My eyelids sprang apart again to find a girl from my year coming towards me, one I felt I should remember, though she was in none of my classes. I couldn’t put a name to her face, and yet the feeling that she was vaguely familiar would not go away.
