Wide Awake

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by Shelly Crane


  COLLIDE

  The Secret Life of Trystan Scott

  Vol. 1

  Description:

  When Mari accidentally overhears that Trystan is in love, she can't believe it. He's pining over some girl that doesn't know he's alive. The confident swagger and endless stream of girls is a facade. It conceals his loneliness and hides how messed up he's really become trying to flee from a life that's battered him to his core.

  Trystan tries to figure out how to make it clear how much he loves Mari, but every insincere kiss and every broken promise haunts him, because she knows them all. Now, Trystan has to prove to the one girl he's actually fallen in love with that she's not just another conquest.

  Mari has no idea who Trystan loves, but she can tell that whoever it is has captured his heart entirely. Soon Mari sees the man behind the mask, the guy that Trystan tries so hard to hide. Everything about him is appealing, and too hard to resist.

  In a moment of desperation, Trystan uploads a love song he wrote for Mari, but before he can show it to her, the video goes viral. Everyone wants to know who he is, and the only thing shielding him is an anonymous account name and some thick shadows hiding his face. Tyrstan realizes that the consequences of revealing his identity will be disastrous. Everything he's tried so hard to hide will be exposed. It's a secret that is impossible to keep and the only girl who he wanted to hear it will never believe him.

  YAParanormalRomance.com

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2012 by H.M. Ward

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form.

  Laree Bailey Press

  First Edition: Sept 2012

  col-lide: to come together with a solid or direct impact.

  CHAPTER 1

  ~MARI~

  The stage wing was thick with shadows. I sat in a metal chair in the alcove between the curtain and the wall, my finger trailing down the pages of the play. They just about knew their lines. The one guy who fumbled was getting chewed out by the director, Mr. Tucker. He was a young teacher, but he wanted perfection from day one. Since this was day twenty-seven, I supposed he was within his right to be agitated. The cast didn’t seem to be into this production.

  Leaning forward, I looked out past the stage and into the rows of seats. Trystan wasn’t there. That guy had chronic time issues. It didn’t matter that he was the lead in this production. His mind was a sieve when it came to learning his lines, so Tucker appointed me to run them with him on a daily basis. This daunting task should have been done prior to practice, but Trystan was late. Again.If he didn’t have charisma and a shockingly beautiful face, someone else would have been given the lead.But, when the guy finally learned his lines, he would make a room full of people swoon—especially the women.

  There wasn’t a girl around who didn’t want to be me. Every single actress and stage-hand offered to help Trystan learn his lines, but Tucker chose me. Why? Because I wasn’t interested in hanging out with a guy who couldn’t keep his lips to himself. That made me the best candidate, so I’ve been badgering the hottest guy in school for the past two years.Thank God he was a senior and this was the end of it. If I had to put up with his friend Seth much longer, I’d cut my ears off.

  Pushing off my chair, I took the playbook and went to find Trystan. If he still didn’t know his lines, Trystan would be a dead man.By extension, I’d also get slammed in the crossfire. Public humiliation wasn’t my thing. I’d shove the play book down his throat if Trystan still didn’t know the second act in full today.

  Careful not to make any noise, I pushed past the black curtains that stretched floor to ceiling. Several more rows of black curtains hung behind the stage concealing the cinderblock wall at the back. The set wasn’t finished yet, so they were still practicing with bare bones on a half empty stage.I moved quietly and tried to stay out of sight.

  Trailing my fingers against the cold walls, I felt my way through the darkness to the back of the stage. Inky shadows covered everything with only slices of light shining through. At the back of the stage there were three doors. Two led to dressing rooms and one led down into the prop room. The prop room was an oversized basement that spanned under the stage. It contained half a century worth of flats, props, and wardrobe. I felt for the metal doorknob and wrapped my fingers around it. Mr. Tucker’s voice was growing more agitated by the moment. If he saw me, he’d scream for Trystan—then we’d both be screwed. Turning the knob ever so slowly, I pulled the basement door open, careful not to make a sound and stepped around it.

  As I stood on the landing, I could hear voices below. Trystan was down there, probably sitting on the couch with his feet kicked up. His voice lacked the normal playfulness. It actually sounded uncertain. “No, it’s not like that. You don’t get it. Everything about her is just—” he sighed as he trailed off.

  Another voice cut him off. This one was more self-assured, more confident. He spoke with the authority only a jock could fully manage. “The girl’s a tease, Trystan. What’s the point of chasing after her if she won’t put out?” That was a typical Seth question.Talk about poor choice in friends. I expected the conversation to stop. I wasn’t that quiet, but the landing was high above the stairwell and tucked at the top of the staircase behind a wall of unused flats. They didn’t seem to realize that I was there.

  “I can’t stop thinking about her,” Trystan sighed, “Every time I close my eyes, she’s there. I can’t get her out of my head.” His voice sounded haunted, like this girl had really gotten to him. Which was something since Trystan dated everyone and was serious about no one.

  As the door clicked shut, I remained motionless—silent—but the metallic click echoed through the room. My heart rate shot up into being-chased-by-a-bear territory. I wanted to hear who she was, who made him sound like that, but the longing in his voice made me feel like a voyeur. I shouldn’t be standing there. I shouldn’t be listening. This was a private conversation, but I was already there.

  Acting like I just walked through the door, I bounded down the metal stairs. I walked around the corner and stepped in front of the flats. Both of them looked up at me.

  Seth was saying, “You need a college girl. Forget these high school girls,” as I rounded the corner.

  Seth was the size of a football player with a toned muscular body, but never seemed to do anything to get that way. His sandy hair was buzz cut, like he had enlisted. He was sitting on a chair across from Trystan, who was slouched back on an old leather couch with his hands behind his head. When Trystan looked up at me, he dropped his hands and straightened a little. There was something in his eyes, something about the way he glanced at Seth, that made me uneasy. He probably thought I heard what he just said.

  Seth turned and looked at me, then back to Trystan. His voice grew louder, more cocky, “Besides, high school girls don’t know how to give a decent blowjob. Do they, Mari?” Seth the pig liked to pick on inexperienced girls and make them blush. It was a pastime for him. From hanging around Trystan, I had become accustomed to his crass questions. My face no longer flushed, although he never stopped trying. The guy talked about sex so much that it no longer shocked me. It was like his brain was swimming in a lust serum. Seth wasn’t hard on the eyes, but his mouth made him repulsive.

  Trystan’s eyes flicked up to mine after Seth spoke. He had no idea what my experience was with guys, if any. Sometimes it felt like everyone thought I was celibate, as though I’d taken an oath or something just because I didn’t want to make out with every guy I met. This confused Trystan. He’d said things in the past, but I didn’t feel the need to explain myself.

  I tossed the play book on the battered coffee table and sat down next to Trystan. Answerin
g Seth, I said, “I’m not planning on giving you demonstration.” Trystan’s blue gaze was on the side of my face. His lips parted slightly like he was surprised. I turned toward him. “What?”

  He shook his head smiling, “Nothing. Just didn’t expect you to say that.” He folded his arms across his chest. The black shirt he was wearing made his eyes look like sapphires.They were such a dark shade of blue.

  “So, who’s a tease?” I asked, assuming that they heard me on the staircase. “Do I know her?”

  Trystan was usually perky, like he’d eaten a case of Pixie Stixs, but he seemed uneasy today. His gaze lowered and he didn’t speak.

  Seth shifted in the old plaid chair. His fingers picked at the threadbare fabric, working a hole into the arm. “You know her,” Seth said, grinning. “You see, Trystan here seems to think she’s worth chasing, but there’s no way in hell she’ll put out. She’s a tease. He just doesn’t see it.” Trystan shot Seth a look.

  “She has no idea you like her?” I ask genuinely intrigued.

  Seth replied for him, “Absolutely none. He can be sitting in the same room as her and she has no fucking clue. It’s pathetic.” He turns to Trystan, saying, “There’s other pussy out there that’s much easier to get. Forget about her man.”

  Seth’s words irritated me on so many levels. “Why should he forget about her? Because she doesn’t sleep with every guy that blinks at her? You’re such a jerk, Seth. Besides, if Trystan found someone he actually likes, why assume anything?” I glance at Trystan. He hasn’t moved. “Maybe she just hasn’t found the right guy yet. Maybe a relationship means something to her.”

  “Waste of time,” Seth says shaking his head. “Relationships are the fastest way to make sure you never get laid. That’s why Trystan here never dates anyone, and neither do I.”

  “How romantic,” I roll my eyes. “And that’s why you’re going to end up alone.”

  Trystan sits up and gives Seth a look that clearly says STOP. Then he turns to me and asks, “What’s with the play book?” He nodded his head toward it. The movement made his dark hair fall into his eyes. With a sweep of his hand, he pushed it back. Trystan’s hair had that carefully messy look. It’s kind of long on top and cut shorter around the bottom. When it’s slicked back for the play, he’ll look pristine. In the meantime, he looks like a rock star, bemusedly sexy, like he knows how beautiful he is and doesn’t care.

  I glared at Seth before turning to Trystan, “Tucker is on the warpath. I thought I’d run lines with you so he doesn’t slaughter us up there.”

  Trystan grinned at me, “What makes you think I didn’t learn them, yet?” He ran his hands through his hair and stretched. That playfulness that was usually there appeared to be coming back. Whatever girl caught his attention did a good job. I hadn’t seen him so out of sorts before.

  “Yeah, right,” I laugh. “That scene in the second act sucked yesterday. You were tripping over your lines like crazy.”

  Seth groaned and pushed off the chair. He smoothed his tee shirt. It clung to his broad shoulders. The guy looked like a giant. “Nerds.”

  Trystan threw a pillow at his friend and it nailed him in the chest. “Get out. I’ll catch up with you later,” Trystan sat up on the couch and reached for the play book. Handing it to me, he said, “Fine. Let’s do it.”

  Seth had an odd look on his face. He shook his head and left without another word. When the door on the upper-landing clicked shut, Trystan’s demeanor changed. He seemed softer without Seth around polluting his thoughts. I really wondered why they hung out together. Trystan was all smooth and subtle with his confidence. Seth was in-your-face about everything. There was no way to have a civilized conversation with that guy. It’s like he was raised by giraffes or something.

  CHAPTER 2

  ~TRYSTAN~

  Why did he tell Seth anything? His remedies always included girls, which in this case was not helpful. Trystan stretched and ran his fingers through his dark hair.This was more than a crush. It wasn’t that the girl had a hot body, even though she did. It was more than that. He connected with her in a way that hadn’t happened before. Being around her made him feel exposed. It was difficult to maintain the endless smiles and witty banter that he was known for.

  To his horror, Trystan didn’t hear that girl—the one that he was so taken with—standing at the top of the stair case. He straightened when he saw Mari round the corner. Trystan tried to make it look like they weren’t talking about her, but she had to know. Didn’t she?

  He didn’t see how she couldn’t. Trystan saw Mari every day. It didn’t matter that she was a junior and he was a senior. Tucker had placed them together when she was a freshman, and they’d spent nearly every day together since.

  The reason Trystan didn’t act on his attraction initially was because she was too young. He was the eldest in his class, and Mari was the youngest in hers. That put nearly two years between them. For a while he told himself that he was just fond of her, like Mari was the little sister he never had. But as time progressed, he knew that was a lie.

  He noticed her quirky mouth early on. That only made her more appealing. Then her body followed, sneaking up on him like a ninja in the middle of the night. Mari’s smooth curves melted into each other, forming a body to match that beautiful face. One day he saw her as Mari, the next she was the most desirable woman he’d ever met. Maybe the transition in his mind was slower than that, more of a gradual change, but Trystan didn’t see it coming. It completely blindsided him.

  To make matters worse, he’d learned over the years everything she couldn’t stand about guys.She had this notion that a kiss should mean something and Trystan made it blatantly obvious that he didn’t share that opinion. He’d shot himself in the head in terms of ever having a relationship with her.That was what he had been trying to ask Seth about.Trystan wanted to know if his friend thought it was possible to backtrack, to fix things with her so he had a chance.

  Seth’s response wasn’t what he wanted to hear, and—as Mari descended the stairs—Seth saw her first and his over-the-top language came out. The guy only talked like that when Mari was around, almost like he hoped his nasty comments would chase her off.

  Instead of running, Mari sat down next to Trystan. God, it was so hard to be so close to her and not touch her. Everything from that light floral scent, to her soft curls made him want her even more.Last night, in a moment of panic, he thought about telling her that he was in love with her.But she wouldn’t believe him.He knew she wouldn’t.Instead, he grabbed his guitar and recorded a song he wrote for her, before uploading it on a whim. He poured his heart out, never saying her name, only telling her that he loved her, and that he wished she noticed him. No one knew he sang or played. It was a secret he didn’t even tell Seth. At times life was too hard.Too much happened, too fast, and it left him feeling paralyzed. Trystan found solace in his music. Now, in the light of day, he thought he should go back and delete that song before someone saw it and figured out it was him.

  Mari leaned into him a little bit, her shoulder lightly touching his. Trystan stiffened, his smile faltered.As Seth and Mari argued, Trystan sat there with his insides lurching. He couldn’t take Seth’s crass mouth. He knew it was upsetting Mari, even though she didn’t act like it. It was the little things he noticed, the way her fingers pressed into her jeans forming a little dent where the denim used to be smooth. The curve of her shoulders squared off slowly, her spine becoming straighter and straighter like she intended to fight Seth. After a moment, Trystan shot Seth a look that clearly said STOP.

  Seth didn’t hang around much longer. When he heard Mari wanted to run lines, Trystan groaned inwardly. It was that scene –the one from yesterday.Though he didn’t let on, every fiber of his body protested. The end of that scene had a kiss, and Trystan didn’t think he could resist.

  End of Preview

 


 

 


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