by C. R. Jane
I dragged myself off the ground and walked into the bathroom. Washing my face, I stared at myself in the mirror.
I had scratches and cuts all over my body from the Hunt. Corran hadn’t had a chance to use his little machine to fix me up yet. I almost didn’t want him to heal me. I wanted to make sure that I never forgot what had happened, that I never forgot this sense of resolve that I had.
Faint voices caught my attention. Looking around the room for where they were coming from, I walked over to the wall where I saw a small speaker. The guys’ voices were coming through it. Evidently, they had forgotten to turn it off with the craziness of what had happened. There was no way that they would have intentionally left it on. They did their best to keep me out of everything.
I guess they weren’t going to get what they wanted this time.
Corran was talking frantically to the other two. "What if she finds out we knew?" he asked, his voice soft like it pained him.
What if I find out they knew what?
Thane answered him sternly, "She’s never going to find out. There would be no coming back from that," he explained.
"It would be better for us to be upfront about it,” argued Corran. "We should just explain our reasoning, how we've changed since then," he continued. "I'm sure she would understand if we just explain."
Derrial laughed. "When has she ever been reasonable?" he asked sarcastically.
I bristled at his tone. I felt like I'd been very reasonable about everything considering the circumstances. They were the ones that were completely unreasonable about everything.
Now I was even more suspicious about what they were talking about.
"It's not like we knew for sure that her parents had been taken, at least not at first," Derrial continued.
I sank to my knees. My heart felt like it was being squeezed to death. Were they talking about what I thought they were talking about? Had they known this entire time where my parents were?
And they had done nothing.
Just let them go through who knows what with the Khonsu?
Thane was right, there really was no coming back from this.
"That's the least of our concerns right now," Thane finally said after a lengthy pause when all of them seemed to be thinking.
“You’re worried that the procedure was successful?" Derrial asked.
They were talking about me getting pregnant in the lab, and my heart shuddered.
“You’re not?” Thane barked.
"Corran, what do you think the chances are that they were able to get it figured out? Is there a way to tell,” Derrial asked, ignoring Thane’s question.
"Not this early," Corran replied. “It will take at least two weeks for the hCG to be strong enough to be detected," he explained.
"Do you really think that they were able to work it out, how to do the implementation successfully without you?" Thane pressed.
"My team was very capable, and they had all of my work. So they should have been able to do it."
He sighed.
"I had hoped that it would have dissuaded them when they found out that I had taken the compound before I left. But now I'm not sure that any of them would even have cared."
This was so much to deal with. Not only could I be pregnant, but I also apparently could still die because of said pregnancy. And my parents had been captured by the Khonsu and had been here the entire time. Once again, how was this my life?
"We need to give her the compound just in case," said Derrial sternly.
“The compound had to be administered at the time of the implementation," Corran added. “It would be too late for that. But she should be fine with our blood sustaining her. That acts the same as the compound because we’re her mates."
“Then we have a fucking problem since our blood is no longer compatible with hers,” roared Thane. He was so loud that the walls shook.
“What the hell do you mean?” said Derrial. “How is that possible?”
“Up on the mountain, when I was saving her…”
“You mean when you were fucking her brains out in front of the Khonsu?” interrupted Derrial dryly, making me blush at the memory because it was a pretty apt description.
“Fuck you,” Thane snapped, annoyed. “This is serious. I bit her while we were having sex...and it made me really sick.”
“What do you mean it made you sick?” asked Corran, I’m sure his brain already thinking of a million scientific reasons why that would have happened.
“I mean it made my throat burn, like it was eating my insides. I had to cough it up before I could even continue.”
As furious as I was at the guys, it felt like I had lost something important knowing that our blood bond had been severed.
“Corran, how does that happen?” asked Derrial. “I’ve never heard of that occurring.”
“Kella,” Corran answered, scornfully.
“What does Kella have to do with anything?” asked Thane.
“Kella was heading up another team. The Council said that he was working on different farm techniques when I asked. I didn’t bother to inquire further because I was busy with my own stuff and I’ve never been particularly impressed with anything Kella has ever done. But this had to be something he was working on…” Corran explained, the end of his sentence trailing off.
“Blood transfer is an integral part of the Vepar’s life," said Derrial. “Why would he be working on something that disrupts that?"
“What's that phrase that Ella always uses, oh yes, that's the million-dollar question," Corran said.
"How long do we have to give her our blood before she starts suffering?” Thane asked, sounding a little bit frantic.
There was a silence, and then a roar and bang as one of them smashed something against a wall. Evidently the answer wasn't good.
I noted that they hadn't talked about what they would do with the baby if I was pregnant, and they hadn't talked about any preventative pills. Maybe they didn't have that in the Vepar culture because of their fertility issues. I had a sense that even bringing something like that up would cause issues that I didn't want to get into at the moment.
I did need to know the differences between caring for a Vepar fetus and a human fetus though. I couldn't help but think of what happened to poor Bella in those Twilight books when she got pregnant with a vampire baby. What if this Vepar baby implanted its little horns into my uterus or something, or maybe it required blood to grow. I didn’t even know if Vepar fetuses required a shorter or longer pregnancy than human babies.
Corran hadn't said anything about any of it in our discussions.
I didn't know if I was pregnant, or if the doctor had a change of heart in the end. I needed to stop worrying for now though. I guess I would cross all of those bridges when I came to them, if I survived to that point that is.
"If they've created something that breaks the blood bond, surely they have something to fix it,” Derrial muttered. I was sure his mind already came up with possible solutions. They took turns being the leader, but I had noticed that Derrial took the lead more often than not.
"I wonder…" said Corran.
"Wonder what?" Thane snarled, obviously annoyed with Corran’s analytical mind at the moment.
"I wonder if Kella’s experiments have anything to do with the rumors that we've heard," Corran expounded slowly.
"The rumors that an unusual amount of our people have seemed to be going crazy lately?" Derrial asked.
"Yes. We've never really studied everything that the blood bond provides our people. I wonder if the blood bond experiments and the fertility issues are somehow connected."
"I don't care about any of that. I'm only concerned about the fact that our mate might die because of it. Do you think you can come up with something that fixes it?" Thane asked. "If she is pregnant, there's no way for us to reverse it. You know this."
Despite how furious I was, I felt a twinge of sympathy for how upset Thane seemed to be.
; "I'm sure I can figure it out, but again, I would assume that they have an antidote for the blood bond issues already created. We just need to get to Kella’s lab."
"We’re heading to his lab then," Derrial said. “Thane, come with me. We’ll need to look at what routes we need to avoid to the capital city. Corran, go check on Ella and see if you can calm her.”
I couldn’t hear anything after that, signaling the end of their conversation.
I sat there, unable to really move with everything I just learned. Vepar pregnancies weren’t reversible. The guys had possibly known that my parents had been here all along. If I was pregnant, I was definitely going to die without the blood bond being fixed. Some of the Vepar were going crazy.
There was so much that they kept from me. I hated this feeling that we were always unequal in our power.
We were now heading to the capital city, where I assumed the lab was. That meant it would be who knows how long until we would have a chance to save my father. I couldn't let that happen. If I did die, then no one would ever save him. It was the least I could do to take care of him. And I still needed to find my Mom.
I wandered back into the bedroom and sat on the bed, thinking of a plan as I did so. I had no idea how to fly a ship, but I was pretty sure that there were smaller emergency cruisers located on all of Corran’s spaceships, if we were on one of Corran’s spaceships to begin with.
I would assume that they would have coordinates already plugged in for places they had been, like the Khonsu settlement. Zeni had offered me a spaceship to return to Earth. That meant that Vepar ships could basically fly themselves since she would have known I had no experience.
I would just have to watch them as we flew to see if I could figure it out.
Just then footsteps sounded outside the door. A second later, a door opened up in the wall and Corran walked inside.
He looked a bit hesitant. "How are you feeling?" he asked gently.
I had to make this look real, that I wasn't actually that mad at them. But I couldn't be too calm, or they would get suspicious.
"I guess I did need this time to think," I told Corran. "I'm still upset, but I somewhat understand. I wouldn't hesitate to save one of you if it were between your life and someone else's."
Corran’s face visibly brightened. It was as if I had taken a huge weight off his shoulders. He came to sit next to me on the bed. "That's exactly it! We can’t stand for anything else to happen to you, Ella." He reached out and softly stroked the side of my face. A tinge of pleasure flashed down my spine. He leaned in to kiss me, and it took everything I had to let him. The fury I felt against them was so hot that I could practically taste it on my tongue. The last thing I wanted to do was kiss him.
He must've sensed my hesitance, because he softly brushed his lips across my mouth before pulling away. "It would kill me if anything happened to you," he said softly.
I ignored the look in his eyes. I knew he meant every word. But what they all needed to understand was that true love didn't come with stipulations. From the beginning, everything had been based on what they wanted and that was the only way the relationship worked. That wasn’t love.
My stomach chose that moment to growl. Corran looked excited at the fact that I had a problem he could fix. "Let's go get you some food," he said eagerly.
I nodded, allowing him to take my hand as he led me out of the room and down to the mess hall. He grabbed a tray from a cabinet, pressed a few buttons on his admittedly useful invention that allowed for basically whatever food you wanted to appear, and then loaded up the tray.
He led me out to the hallway again, and my heart leaped. Was he taking me to the Bridge?
It was just my luck that Thane and Derrial were busy planning the best route to avoid the Council’s army that was on the lookout for us and get to the Capital...because that meant that Corran needed to watch over the ship’s controls.
We walked into the Bridge, and I was relieved to see that it looked similar to the past ships that I had been on with them. This had to be one of Corran’s fleet.
I watched him as he fiddled with the controls, absentmindedly putting food in my mouth just because I knew I would need energy for what lay ahead.
"You're having to press a lot of buttons over there," I told him. "I was under the impression that these things practically flew themselves," I continued disingenuously.
Corran laughed, a rosy hue appearing on his cheeks. I had caught him doing something. "They can fly by themselves, but there's something about the thrill of doing it myself. I only put it on what you humans call “cruise control” when I'm out of the room."
"So how does that work? I've been in Earth’s planes’ cockpits before, but this looks nothing like that,” I asked him.
I felt a little bad. I was praying on Corran’s love for all things tech. Corran had from the beginning loved to show me how his creations worked. Evidently, showing me how to fly the ship wasn't any different.
He began to show me exactly how everything worked. If I managed to get away, I know he would be kicking himself. I put my emotions to the side. I would think about my complicated relationship with all of them later.
Corran had just finished explaining how to input in the coordinates when the entrance to the Bridge opened and Thane and Derrial walked in.
They looked as nervous as Corran had looked when he had first come to talk to me.
"On a scale of 1 to 100 how mad are you right now, pet?" asked Derrial, peering at me intently.
Try a billion, I thought to myself.
"I'm still angry, but I understand more why you felt the need to get me out of there as fast as possible," I said, shooting Corran a look. "I would have a problem with all of you being in danger as well," I explained.
And it was the truth.
A part of me understood their need to keep me safe. The problem I had with them was their inability to consult with me about anything and all the secrets that they continually hid from me. They had known how devastating it was for me to think all these years that I had lost my parents. Now to know that they had been here all along, and that the guys had potentially known that they were with the Khonsu...It just was incomprehensible that they would have kept that from me. Maybe in the beginning before there were any real feelings between us, I could see them keeping it quiet. But they claimed I was supposed to be their mate now.
How could they have continued to keep my parents’ existence from me?
"Ella?" asked Thane suspiciously.
Shit. Going off into lala land wasn't how I needed to be acting right now. I smiled weakly. "Sorry, it's just all been a lot. I can't believe that my parents are alive," I said, the threat of emotion tickling my throat.
Corran moved over to me and softly touched my back, trying to comfort me. "We promise as soon as we get settled, and can come up with a plan, we will go back for your father," he said meaningfully.
It was funny, but I didn't believe a single word that was coming out of his mouth, even though I think he meant them. Something would always inevitably come up that would make them feel the need to try to keep me safe rather than do what I wanted.
Continuing with my plan, I kissed Corran softly on the cheek. "Thank you. That means so much to me," I told him.
"What's the plan?" I asked. "Where are we going to right now?" I said pretending that I was unaware of anything.
I watched as the guys exchanged wary glances. "We haven't talked very much about what happened back in the lab," Corran began.
“You mean the fact that I'm possibly pregnant with an unknown Vepar embryo?" I asked sarcastically.
He nodded somberly. "As a safeguard, to protect my experiments, I had taken one of the key compounds with me whenever I left the lab. The compound was integral to the success of the viability of both the embryo and the host."
I interrupted him. “Can’t I just start taking it once I find out if I’m even pregnant," I said.
Corran shook his head. “It's to
o late already. It had to be administered at the time of implantation,” Corran explained seriously.
I let the fear that I'd been trying to block from my mind briefly show through on my face.
Thane stepped forward. "But it will be okay," he said quickly. "Because we've all blood bonded with you, if we just continue to share blood with you, everything will be alright," he said, trying to comfort me.
"I'm sensing a but...," I told him, annoyed at how long it was taking them to get the information out that I already knew.
The guys exchanged another glance. They had been around each other for so long that they could have whole conversations without even saying anything. Or maybe there was a telekinetic aspect to it all that they hadn't bothered telling me about. I wouldn't put it past them.
"Something's wrong with our blood bond," Thane answered reluctantly. "We're on our way to another of the Council’s labs to try and see if they have the fix for it."
“And if they don't have the fix?" I said, trying to calm the hysteria I felt every time I thought about it.
"Then I'll figure it out," Corran said resolutely.
“Right,” I said with a nod knowing how important it was to Corran that I believed him. “I think I'm going to go lay down," I told them. "How long until we get to our destination?" I asked.
Corran looked at some of his controls. "Another three hours I believe," he said.
Veon was a lot bigger than Earth, I thought to myself. It had seemed like we were able to travel extremely long distances within just a few minutes on Earth. I would have to ask Corran how all of that worked. Just not right now.
"You want one of us to go with you?" Derrial asked, even though I could tell that he was itching to get back to his planning.
"I'll be fine," I said with a smile that hopefully looked convincing. Everything depended on me being alone obviously. They all nodded, and I forced myself to kiss them on the cheek before leaving the room.
My next stop was the medical room. I needed to find whatever Corran had used to knock me out the last time we were on one of his ships. I would need at least a little bit of a head start to get out of here, and that would depend on all three of them being out for the count.
