by A. G. Wilde
Lauren gripped his chin and turned his face toward her.
“It was never your fault. What your mother did was inexcusable.”
Riv nodded.
“I know you’re right. But that doesn’t erase the fact that I had to go through hell to reach this point.” He paused. “I learned a long time ago, in the mines and after, that beings can’t be trusted. No one in my life had been trustworthy. Not my mor, not the beings working in the mines…by the time I ended up at the exchange I knew I could trust no one.” He met her gaze. “Every single being up to this point, bar Ka’Cit, Geblit, and Sohut, has proven to me that beings can’t be trusted. You just have to give them time to show you that truth.”
Lauren continued to stroke her fingers across his cheek and he closed his eyes briefly and leaned into her hand a little.
“Do you understand what I’m trying to say?” He searched her gaze. “I thought you were like that.” He paused. “Out here, I don’t have to worry about being betrayed. The animals are not like other beings. And you…” He paused. “You’ve been nothing but perfect the entire time you’ve been here.”
She almost choked at hearing that.
Her?
Perfect?
Before she could respond, Riv looked ahead once more.
“Riv?” she asked. “Why are you telling me all this? Why now?”
Riv sighed. “Well, I’ve been trying my damnedest to avoid you, if you haven’t noticed.”
She smiled at that.
“I failed. Miserably.” He glanced her way. “Now I think this is the least I can do. Allow me to give you the gift of freedom from the Tasqals. It is what I’d have loved for someone to do for me.”
28
They pulled up at the exchange and Riv grasped her hand as he hurried down one of the streets toward a tall building, Grot keeping up with them as they hurried through the crowd.
Hood over her head, Lauren kept her head down as they weaved in and out of the throng of shoppers, trying to get to their destination.
She gripped his arm, thoughts on everything that he’d told her in the hovercar.
She had known there was something deeper about him—something that pulled her to him, despite his gruff demeanor.
And now she knew.
Riv was only a tortured soul.
Underneath all that gruffness was someone who was dying to be loved.
As he bounded up a ramp to the door of the building, he paused so she could catch her breath.
“You all right?”
“Yes,” she nodded, glancing behind them.
There was still no sign of the guards.
Riv followed her gaze, too, his eyes scanning the crowd below.
“Come, we must make haste,” he said.
The inside of the building was not what she’d expected it to be.
It looked like the inside of a bank on Earth.
The only thing that differentiated it was the many different species of aliens inside and behind the transparent barriers.
Riv pulled her beside him and they moved together to one of the queues.
As they waited, she glanced up at him every now and then but she couldn’t read the expression on his face.
He wasn’t wearing his eye-shades or his face covering today but she still couldn’t read him.
“Do I need any documents? I don’t have even an ID from Earth.”
Riv glanced down at her, his eyes still unreadable.
Guarded, almost.
As if he was preparing himself for rejection of some kind.
“No. You don’t need identification. They will scan your biosignature. You will be registered based on your DNA as a refugee under the protection of the Interplanetary Union.”
Lauren’s eyebrows rose a little.
He sounded like he knew exactly what he was talking about and she guessed it was something he’d had to do before.
The queue moved quickly and soon they were at the front staring into the eyes of your typical intergalactic alien public sector worker.
The being on the other side of the barrier looked bored and completely uninterested.
“Name,” the alien said in monotone. The alien’s eyes were on stalks above their clam-shaped head and they blinked once as the alien regarded them.
Riv glanced down at her.
“Lauren. Lauren McDonald,” she answered.
“Planet of origin.”
“Earth.”
“Please state your business.”
She glanced at Riv but he began speaking immediately, giving her hand a slight squeeze and she realized at that moment that he hadn’t let her go.
“She is registering for protection under the Interplanetary Union under Directive Exhashimor.”
The alien behind the screen blinked at her and Lauren held her breath.
“And who will be her sponsor?”
“I will be.”
Lauren glanced from the alien, then to Riv.
Sponsor?
She didn’t know she’d need a sponsor.
A thin ray of blue light ran from Riv’s head to his toes and back.
“Rivenendrus U’xol Cal-Pholy,” the worker said, “please indicate you are aware a sponsor relinquishes one half of his assets when undertaking sponsorship of a being with refugee status.”
What?
Lauren’s eyes widened as they snapped to Riv.
He didn’t look surprised.
“Yes,” he replied.
“Wait!” Gripping his bicep with her free hand, Lauren caught his attention. “What are you doing?!” she hissed.
“I thought that was clear,” Riv’s voice was even, unperturbed. “We’re registering you so you can be free.”
Lauren blinked a few times, trying to read his gaze.
“But, if you do this for me, they’re going to take half of everything you own. That’s not…” Despite that she wanted this more than anything, asking him to sacrifice so much… “That’s a lot. I—”
Riv shrugged. “Are you planning on doing anything stupid? Anything illegal?”
“Of course not!”
“Then that settles it.” He turned back to the counter and nodded to the clerk.
She could only stare up at him, disbelieving the current events.
As the clerk filed the information, Lauren couldn’t move her gaze from him and Riv kept looking forward, not meeting her eyes.
“What form of body fluid would you like to register to create the biosignature?” the clerk asked.
She was so focused on him, still unable to believe he was doing so much for her, that she didn’t realize the clerk was speaking to her.
“I’m sorry, what?”
The clerk’s expression grew even more uninterested. “What form of body fluid would you like to register to create the biosignature?”
Riv finally looked down and met her gaze, causing her to blink, and her head cleared a little.
“You need, like, my pee or something?”
The clerk stared through her soul.
“Urine? Highly unhygienic.” Displeasure twisted the clerk’s face. “Your saliva is fine.”
Oh.
There was a slight sound and a small metal disk appeared in the counter.
“Deposit your fluid there,” the alien instructed.
Lauren glanced at Riv again.
“Are you sure you want to do this for me?”
What if he was having some momentary mental crisis and changed his mind later?
“I am sure,” was all he said before giving her hand a little squeeze.
Taking a deep breath, Lauren nodded.
Bending a little, she spat on the disk.
With a whirr that made Grot growl, the disk disappeared.
“Registered. Lauren McDonald of Earth.”
The counter whirred again and another item appeared. It was a smooth metal square with no identifying marks.
“Please take your proof of status and exit to the left,” the alien said.
That was it?
Taking the small rectangular piece of metal, it felt warm under her fingers.
She was staring at it wordlessly as they exited the building and even when they reached the street.
“This piece of metal means I am…free?”
Riv was watching her with a strange look in his eyes. Even Grot seemed a bit unsure.
“Yes. You are free to go wherever you want to go and do whatever you would like to do. You won’t have to worry about being thrown in a cell or a zoo anymore.”
She had to take a moment as the feeling of a huge weight lifting off her shoulders passed through her.
Those were words she never knew she wanted to hear.
Smiling, she looked across the throng of aliens. She was free.
As the feeling settled within her, it hit a bump and froze.
He’d done this for her. Given up half of everything he had…for her. It was the kindest thing anyone had ever done for her in her entire life.
Tears sprung in her eyes as she stopped walking amidst the throng and stared up at him.
“Riv, I… How will I ever repay you?”
Riv’s throat moved. “I didn’t do it with the hope you’d repay me in some way, La-rehn.”
“But…” Her throat was swollen with emotion. “You hate me.”
A sort of sadness she didn’t expect passed before his eyes before his gaze became tortured.
“Quite the opposite, La-rehn.”
Four words.
Four words that made her breathing stop and her world pause.
She didn’t know how to reply as he searched her gaze
“Riv…”
A loud commotion down the street cut through their exchange and had her turning to look in that direction.
The blood drained from her face and her mouth went dry.
Farther down in the direction they were heading, four of the alligator-looking guards turned the corner.
Lauren’s heart sped up in her chest, but she gripped the metal in her hand instead.
She didn’t need to hide from them. Riv had made sure of that.
As she stared, the throng of aliens starting to thin out as the guards neared, she realized it was a procession like the one she’d seen before.
Moving to the side and out of the street, she got out of the way, thinking Riv would follow.
But he didn’t.
Instead, he stood looking ahead, his eyes on the procession. His entire body was rigid, it didn’t even look as if he was breathing.
“Riv!” she whispered harshly, but he didn’t budge.
What the hell was he doing?
Rushing back into the street, she flashed a hand in front of his face but still there was no response.
Anxiety began to build within her.
He had his staring contests, yes, but this seemed different. Either way, it was a helluva time to have one now.
“Riv?”
His eyes were vacant, as if he was no longer there and when she pulled on his arm to move him from the middle of the street, he didn’t budge.
He was like a statue.
Glancing over her shoulder, she saw the procession was nearing and her anxiety quickened.
It was as if he was looking at a ghost and when she glanced behind her again, she realized why.
The guards were walking with one of those toad-like beings between them. The huge toad was dressed in all white. On its head was a round golden headdress.
Wait.
She knew that Tasqal. Well, she’d heard of it.
Riv had mentioned that headdress before.
It took a moment for reality to dawn.
She knew who it was.
It was the Tasqal who had tried to force him into sex. The one who’d had him working in the mines as a child. The one who’d cut off his tail.
Shit.
Shit shit.
“Riv!” she called harshly, but he didn’t move.
Grot bumped against him, letting out a low boom that caught the attention of some of the aliens to the side.
Their terrified gazes moved from the dog to Lauren then to Riv.
They knew what was going to happen. She knew what was going to happen. Even Grot could sense what was going to happen, as he began to whimper a little.
She had to get Riv to move!
Seeing his former master must have triggered something in his head, especially since he’d not long ago relived the horrors by telling her about it in the hovercar.
He was far away. He couldn’t hear her and if they stayed in the street the way they were, she had no question they would be cut down like she’d seen them murder the parent and child.
“Riv!”
No response.
She tried to pull his arm again.
Nothing.
Fuck!
She needed to do something and she needed to do it fast.
Standing on tiptoe, she did the only other thing that came to mind.
She plastered her mouth against his.
Something nice and inviting was pressing into him.
Something was pulling him back from the void he’d suddenly fallen into.
Zooming back to the present was like taking a breath of fresh air after drowning.
Riv blinked, a barrage of feelings hitting him all at once.
La-rehn.
Sweet, soft La-rehn was against him, mouth phekking him.
With a moan, he pulled her toward him, forgetting about everything and everyone around them.
It was just him and her.
This felt right.
It was right!
His eyes zoned in on her smooth face but as soon as his gaze met hers, she pulled away.
“Fuck! Riv!” She was off him, pulling away and grabbing his hand.
Confused, he almost resisted but he was too caught up in the memory of the feel of her lips against his.
La-rehn.
Vaguely, he felt Grot’s huge frame pushing against him as La-rehn pulled him toward her and out of the street.
Pushing herself into a space between two stalls, she turned and pulled him closer.
“Shh,” she whispered. “Don’t move. Don’t look. Don’t turn around.”
For a moment, he was confused but then it all came crashing back like the tail end of a storm.
The female Tasqal.
The one that had removed his tail.
The one that had wanted to use him.
Riv stiffened.
“Shh.” La-rehn took his face between her hands. “It’s okay. Don’t look. She’ll pass by and you can forget all about the bitch afterward.”
His chest was beginning to heave and he couldn’t stop it.
It was the first time since leaving the mines that he’d seen that specific Tasqal. The first time in so many orbits.
He’d imagined seeing the female again, what it would be like. He’d never imagined it would be like this.
Debilitating.
All the memories of back then were coming crashing in all at once.
It was hard to keep focused.
The only thing that was keeping him sane was the soft hands against his face, and when he looked down, there she was, whispering affirmations to him as she held him with her brown-eyed gaze.
He’d been such a fool.
How did he ever imagine she was like anyone in his past?
Phek him.
He’d wasted so much time.
The thought made an ache develop within him, one different from the pain of his past he was experiencing.
“La-rehn,” he repeated.
“I’m here, Riv. I’ve got you.”
His throat clogged up on hearing that and he became barely aware of the procession passing them by.
She had him.
Of all the things to say, those were the words she chose…and they were exactly the ones he needed to hear.
He’d opened up to her about his past…shown her that big patch th
at made him vulnerable.
And now he realized something.
Actually, he’d known it from the moment he’d seen the Hedgerud fighters who’d come to take her from the Sanctuary…he didn’t want to lose La-rehn.
Phek.
Even saying it now made him shiver.
It was a huge deal admitting something like that to himself.
He’d tried to fight it, but it got to the point where he didn’t know why he was fighting anymore.
He liked La-rehn.
He liked her a lot.
As the market goers slowly flooded the streets once more, his green eyes pierced into hers.
“Forgive me, La-rehn,” he said.
“For what?” Her voice was but a whisper.
He shook his head. It was too much for him to list. “For…everything.”
“Riv…”
“I want you.”
Her mouth opened and closed in shock, her eyes growing larger.
“I want you. I want you on the Sanctuary. I wasn’t planning to ever let you leave.” He swallowed hard. “I know that now.”
His words sounded thick with emotion and from the way she was looking at him, it was clear she could hardly process what she was feeling.
“I thought…I was best alone,” he choked out. “I thought I didn’t need anyone.”
“And now you think you do?” Her words were cautious, guarded, thick with sentiments, too.
It only took a moment for him to answer. “I know I do.” He paused.
Riv swallowed hard and he let his raw emotion show in his eyes.
Realization slowly dawned on her face.
“I’ve wanted to apologize…” he said. “I’ve been a bad host to you.”
“Not completely. And even then, you’re more pissy than abusive.” That made her chuckle and he felt his features soften a little.
“There’s more to you than you’ve been showing me, isn’t there. I can feel it,” she said.
That made him stiffen slightly.
“What I’ve been showing you is what I’ve shown everyone else. Only you have no survival instincts.”
For a second, her face was blank, then her lips suddenly split and she bared her teeth at him.
Riv watched her, confused.
At another time, he’d have challenged her right back.
“I do not understand your challenge right now?”
Her lips closed a little before she chuckled.
“I’m not challenging you, Riv. I’m grinning. It means I’m happy.”
