James Graham Plays 2

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by James Graham


  He can’t answer his own question. So he exits.

  THAT WAS THE WEEK THAT WAS

  Millicent Martin (singing) That was the week that was. A life passes before our eyes

  From a master of disguise

  Or just an Emperor in new clothes?

  He stood 41 times And lost 41 times

  But he didn’t seem to mind With his leopard-print coat Screaming at you to vote That democracy rocks

  So put a cross in his box His only defence

  Was that insanity – made sense. That was the week that was!

  David Frost John F Kennedy. Lord Mountbatten. Martin Luther King. To their special club of great political titans taken from us too early . . . they have a gate crasher, The self-titled, self-aggrandising, self-appointed, Screaming Lord Sutch, the 3rd Earl of Harrow, has died.

  He was found hanging from the bannister of his late mother’s house after committing suicide. His home, an Aladdin’s Cave of hoarded items and memorabilia that neighbours say took three skips, to clear out. Testament to a life that began at the very start of the War, and concluded at the very end of this century.

  500 hundred people turned up to listen to the funeral service, wearing loony outfits. Including the Conservative Stuart Hughes, also dressed in Loony attire.

  Screaming Lord Sutch broke the record as being, officially, the least successful politician of all time. And yet also, at the time of his death, he became the longest-serving leader of a British political party in history. His legacy lives on.

  Modern Prime Ministers arrive on stage – Major, Blair, Brown and Cameron. Behind them, appears Sutch, in his outfit . . .

  The sound of a Panto Dame, echoing around us.

  ‘Where is he, can you see him, boys and girls? Can you see where he is?’ Followed by the cry from the audience: ‘He’s behind you’.

  Blackout.

  Discover. Read. Listen. Watch.

  A NEW WAY TO ENGAGE WITH PLAYS

  Over 2,000 titles, in text, audio and video,

  from curriculum must-haves to contemporary classics

  Playtexts from over 300 leading playwrights including

  David Mamet, Katori Hall, Samuel Beckett, Caryl Churchill,

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  Christopher Shinn, Tom Stoppard, Bernard Shaw, Anton Chekhov,

  Sophocles, the Arden Shakespeare and more

  400 Audio plays From L.A. Theatre Works including

  works by Pulitzer Prize-winning playwrights Lynn Nottage,

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  Live performances, feature films,

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  PLUS scholarly books, student guides,

  reference and theatre craft

  FIND OUT MORE:

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  Bloomsbury Methuen Drama Modern Plays

  include work by

  Bola Agbaje Robert Holman

  Edward Albee Caroline Horton

  Davey Anderson Terry Johnson

  Jean Anouilh Sarah Kane

  John Arden Barrie Keeffe

  Peter Barnes Doug Lucie

  Sebastian Barry Anders Lustgarten

  Alistair Beaton David Mamet

  Brendan Behan Patrick Marber

  Edward Bond Martin McDonagh

  William Boyd Arthur Miller

  Bertolt Brecht D. C. Moore

  Howard Brenton Tom Murphy

  Amelia Bullmore Phyllis Nagy

  Anthony Burgess Anthony Neilson

  Leo Butler Peter Nichols

  Jim Cartwright Joe Orton

  Lolita Chakrabarti Joe Penhall

  Caryl Churchill Luigi Pirandello

  Lucinda Coxon Stephen Poliakoff

  Curious Directive Lucy Prebble

  Nick Darke Peter Quilter

  Shelagh Delaney Mark Ravenhill

  Ishy Din Philip Ridley

  Claire Dowie Willy Russell

  David Edgar Jean-Paul Sartre

  David Eldridge Sam Shepard

  Dario Fo Martin Sherman

  Michael Frayn Wole Soyinka

  John Godber Simon Stephens

  Paul Godfrey Peter Straughan

  James Graham Kate Tempest

  David Greig Theatre Workshop

  John Guare Judy Upton

  Mark Haddon Timberlake Wertenbaker

  Peter Handke Roy Williams

  David Harrower Snoo Wilson

  Jonathan Harvey Frances Ya-Chu Cowhig

  Iain Heggie Benjamin Zephaniah

  For a complete listing of Bloomsbury

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  Bloomsbury Methuen Drama

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  www.bloomsbury.com

  Bloomsbury is a registered trade mark of Bloomsbury Publishing Plc

  This collection first published 2016

  This House first published in 2012 by Methuen Drama and revised in 2013 © James Graham 2012, 2013, 2016

  The Angry Brigade first published in 2014 by Methuen Drama and revised in 2016 © James Graham 2014, 2016

  The Vote first published in 2016 by Methuen Drama © James Graham 2016

  Monster Raving Loony first published in 2016 by Methuen Drama © James Graham 2016

  This collection copyright © James Graham 2016

  Introduction copyright © James Graham 2016

  James Graham has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act, 1988, to be identified as author of this work.

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or any information storage or retrieval system, without prior permission in writing from the publishers.

  No responsibility for loss caused to any individual or organization acting on or refraining from action as a result of the material in this publication can be accepted by Bloomsbury or the author.

  This version of the text went to print before the end of rehearsals and may differ slightly from the version performed.

  All rights whatsoever in these plays are strictly reserved and application for performance etc. should be made before rehearsals begin to Curtis Brown Group Ltd., Haymarket House, 28- 29 Haymarket, London, SW1Y 4SP.

  No rights in incidental music or songs contained in the Work are hereby granted and performance rights for any performance/ presentation whatsoever must be obtained from the respective copyright owners.

  British Library Cataloguing-in-Publication Data

  A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

  ISBN: PB: 978-1-3500-2157-0

  ePub: 978-1-3500-2159-4

  ePDF: 978-1-3500-2158-7

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  A catalog record for this book is available from the Library of Congress.

  Cover image © Getty Images/Tim Thompson/EyeEm

  Typeset by Mark Heslington Ltd, Scarborough, North Yorkshire

 

 

 
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