by Kylie Kent
Realising I’m not going to get out of this I grunt as I get up off the bed. “Fine, but I’m getting dressed first.”
Chapter Fourteen
Zac
Sitting on the bed with Alyssa across from me, I wait for her to speak. This is uncharted territory for me, I’m not the one that usually digs and pries into a girl’s life, but Alyssa is different. I want to know everything, but right now the one thing I want to know is why she had a fucking panic attack at receiving flowers. I also want to know who the he is that she seemed so fucking scared off.
When I got to her in that bathroom, I felt like my world was tipped on its axis. She looked so fucking broken and scared; all I wanted to do was hold her and put her back together. When she clung to me and wouldn’t let go, it destroyed me to see her so frightened. I never want to see that again.
“Sunshine, I need to know why you had a panic attack about the flowers.”
Keeping my voice soft, I try to reassure her that she’s safe here, that I would never let anything happen to her. As she looks me in the eye, I can see the tears starting to form, her entire body shakes as she takes a deep breath in. It’s fucking killing me seeing her like this.
Reaching forward, I lift her by her hips, placing her on my lap so she is straddling me. Cupping her face, I wipe away the tears that are freely falling and wait for her to speak.
Taking a few deep breaths, she looks me in the eye, pleading, “I can’t lose you. What if I tell you and you decide it’s too much, that I’m too damaged?”
I don’t know how to reassure her I’m not going anywhere. I try to show in my actions just how much she means to me. I kiss her under each eye, kissing away her tears, lightly press my lips to hers.
“Alyssa, I’m not going anywhere, and you are not fucking damaged. Understand?” My voice is getting gruffer as I continue to rein in my anger at whatever the fuck made her think she was damaged.
Nodding her head, she says, “okay.” She takes another big breath in before she finally lets me in. “I grew up in foster care, many foster care homes actually. My mum died when I was five, she didn’t have any family; it was always just my mum and me. I don’t remember much about her, but I do remember that she was sick, like all the time. I found out later that she died from breast cancer.”
Alyssa pauses, looking for something on my face, she must not find the reaction that she expects as she continues. “It’s why I don’t want kids, breast cancer can be hereditary and I can’t think of anything worse than leaving a child behind with no one to love them like I was.”
I understand her reasons for not wanting children, however, I don’t agree with her that her kids would be left alone or that she is destined to have the same fate as her mother.
“Sunshine, if you had kids they sure as fuck wouldn’t be left with no one, they would have me. Because, if you decided you wanted kids, I’m the only person you’re going to have them with.” She opens her mouth to argue but I’m not finished yet. Placing my finger over her mouth I add, “also, you don’t know that you will have the same fate as your mother. I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that the medical industry has advanced a lot since you were five.”
“I know, I haven’t even had the gene test done yet to see if I have the inherited gene mutation linked to breast cancer.” She looks down at her lap twisting her fingers together. “I figured if I don’t know then I won’t stress about it as much. Five to ten percent of breast cancers are thought to be hereditary. What if I’m one of those five to ten percent?”
“Sunshine, you can’t live with that fear, you should get the test and we will deal with whatever comes our way, together.”
I rub my hands up and down her legs, not sure if it’s reassuring her or me at this point.
“Promise?” she asks, looking so insecure.
“I swear, we will always have a tomorrow together.” Leaning in, I meet her lips ever so lightly then sit back and wait for her to continue.
Shaking her head, she says, “anyway. One foster home I lived when I was fifteen, they had five other kids living there too. There was one guy, he was seventeen, always gave me the creepy kind of vibe, you know? His name was Steven. I did everything I could to stay clear of him, but he was always there, always staring at me. I knew I had to get out of that house so I …” she trails off, looking away.
“You what?”
“I slapped the foster mum across the face; wasn’t my finest moment but I knew it would be my ticket out. I was moved home the next day, but not before her husband returned the favour and slapped me around a bit.”
I’m doing everything I can to not show the rage rolling through my body at the thought of a grown ass man slapping around a fifteen-year-old Alyssa. I know my face must tell my anger as I clench my jaw. Alyssa takes in my face, places her hands on my shoulders.
“I swear, I’m not that child anymore Zac. I don’t go around hitting people, really. I became a nurse because I wanted to help people.”
Shaking my head, I consider what she must have been like at fifteen. “Sunshine, I couldn’t care less if you went around slaughtering people, I’d have Dean and Bray bury the bodies for you. I’d only ask that you don’t slaughter me in my sleep.” I smirk at her in an attempt to lighten the mood; even if what I say is one hundred percent truth.
The thought scares the crap out of me, I don’t think there is anything this girl could do that would sway my opinion of her. She doesn’t even realise the amount of control she has over me.
Smiling, she says, “of course I would spare you, have you seen you? I mean if I slaughtered you, I might as well turn it into a murder suicide, because life would not be worth living if I don’t get a daily dose of the orgasms you dish out.”
I’m laughing again. When was the last time I laughed so damn much?
“I will give you as many orgasms as you like,” I promise as I lean in kiss her lightly. “As soon as we’re done with this talk, that is.”
“Argh. Okay. Well, I ran into Steven again at college, two-and-a-half-years ago. He asked me out, I declined and I thought that was that.” And the rage is back, I’m grinding my teeth in an attempt to hold it in. “Anyway, he stalked me for six months before the police could catch who it was. It was Steven, my stalker was Steven.”
“What do you mean stalked you? What the fuck did he do?” I don’t think I can hold in this rage much longer; I want to find the motherfucker and bury him.
“It started with roses. He would send roses, at first without cards. No messages, just bunches of roses.” Shit, her eyes are tearing up again, but I need to hear this, I need the rest, squeezing her thighs I encourage her to continue. “Then it was the messages. H … he would send me text messages from random numbers, but always describing what I was wearing and where I was at that time. Like he wanted me to know I was being watched. I never knew who it was. I guess he got bored with that because the roses started coming with the same message all the time.”
“What did the message say?” I ask, unsure if I want to know.
“It always said SLUT in bold letters. Then the text messages described what he was planning on doing to me in very detailed description right down to how he would choke the life out of me because, according to him, sluts like me were not worth the air they breathe.”
I take a shaky breath in, waiting for her to continue.
“One time he broke into my house, stole every pair of underwear I had, and left a note on my bed.” She shivers, her fingers gripping the fabric of my shirt.
“It got to the point that I couldn’t leave the house. I locked myself in the house for two months before he was caught. The girls took turns to stay with me, so I was never alone. It came time for my practical placement at the hospital. I had to go in, I knew I had to do my placement. I had worked too damn hard to get to that point in my degree; I decided I would not lose everything I worked for because some psycho had a hard on for me.”
“And then what happened?” I ask.
“Hospital security caught him when he had me cornered in the hallway of emergency, his hands around my throat attempting to do just what he said he would.”
Shit.
“Sunshine, I didn’t know. You should tell me if anything I do is a trigger for you, I just had my hand around your throat and you didn’t say anything. Shit, baby I’m so sorry.”
“Zac stop. That was not the same. Maybe it should trigger me somehow, but it didn’t. Quite the opposite, I freaking loved it. I can’t explain why some things trigger a panic attack and others don’t. You are the first guy I’ve been with since Steven was arrested. Even though that date Sarah pushed me to go on didn’t pan out, it did lead me to you.”
Taking my hands into her own, she takes a breath, bringing her gaze to meet mine. “I can’t explain what it is, but I feel safe with you. I feel like nothing can get to me when I’m with you. I’m sorry and I will understand if it’s too much too soon for you. I’ve never been this clingy type before. I don’t know what’s come over me.”
I can tell she’s nervous because she’s rambling. “Sunshine, cling away, because I’m not letting go. In fact, you should stay with me for a while, we can go pack some of your stuff and I’ll clear out some space in the wardrobe; or I can just order you new stuff.”
Alyssa laughs like I’m joking but she stops when she notices I’m not laughing with her.
“Wait, oh god, you’re serious, aren’t you?” she asks.
“Deadly serious, babe.”
She shakes her head. “I’m not moving in with you, we just met like two days ago.”
Her argument is weak if you ask me. “So? And it’s not moving in if it’s just a few things and called staying with me.” I smirk as I place my hands under her shirt, rubbing my fingers up and down the sides of her stomach. “Besides, think of how many more orgasms we could create together if you stayed here, in this bed, with me.”
“Mmm, that has merit. But no, I’m not staying here.” Just then her stomach rumbles.
“Hungry?” I ask.
“A little,” she says, shyly.
How is it she can be as daring as they come when it’s about sex and then shy because she’s hungry? It’s fucking cute. Lifting her off my lap, I settle her on the bed.
“I’ll go fetch you something to eat,” I tell her. Just as I’m getting off the bed, she reaches out gripping my shirt, fear written all over her face. “Sunshine, I’m just going to the kitchen, I’m not leaving the apartment.” I don’t make a move to remove her hands, I’ll wait as long as she needs me.
“O-Okay, sorry, I just …” she casts her eyes down.
I lift her chin with my finger so I can see those beautiful blue eyes. “Babe, it’s fine, you don’t need to apologise to me.”
Settling back down I reach for her and pull her into my arms, kissing the top of her head. I reach over and pick up my phone, dialling Reilly’s number.
“Hello, Zac? What’s wrong? How is she? I swear I will—” I don’t let her finish her tirade.
“Reilly, she’s fine, I need you to bring in some food; something that she likes, check the fridge.” I don’t wait for her response before I hang up the phone.
“Oh my god, I’m being ridiculous, aren’t I?” Alyssa looks up at me, insecurity written all over her face.
“No, you’re not. I don’t want you to ever be embarrassed to feel how you feel, not with me. I’ve got you, always.” I kiss the top of her head and rub my hands down her back.
“Thank you,” she says, wrapping her arms around my waist.
We stay like that for a few minutes, soaking up each other in peace until the door bursts open and three females push at each other to get in.
“What the fuck Reilly. I said for you to bring food, not people,” I grunt at the redhead in the front holding a plate of food.
“How did you all get up here anyway?” I ask, looking at Holly and Sarah.
I feel Alyssa’s body tense, looking down at her, silently asking her what’s wrong with my eyes.
“I’m sorry Zac. I can leave, take them with me. I swear I didn’t ask them to come here.”
Leave, like fuck she can leave. “Sunshine, I don’t care that your friends are here, you need them. I am, however, curious how they got up considering you need a key pass to reach the penthouse.”
At this, Reilly pipes up triumphantly, “oh, I went down and rode back up with them, I used your card thingy.” I’m speechless, Reilly however is not. “I also called your brother. He’s currently sulking in the living room. Dean was already here so there’s that. I also introduced myself to Ella, she was a little stunned to see a random redhead in your apartment because according to her and I quote, if you’re one of Zac’s floozies, you’re too late, he’s found his forever girl. I think I might love her already. Here Ella made you food.” She says as she places the plate on the bed next to Alyssa.
Reilly takes it upon herself to sit on the bed next to Alyssa. Raising my eyebrows at her, I say, “please, have a seat.”
At this Holly and Sarah both stalk forward and sit on the bed. Jesus Christ, what the fuck is going on in here? I look over to see Alyssa smiling. Damn, she’s fucking smiling and it’s like the sunshine is back within her. I decide her friends can sit wherever the fuck they want if it makes her smile.
“Babe, I’m gonna go see Bray and Dean for a few. Will you be all right in here with your girls, or do you want to come with?” I ask, hoping like fuck she wants to stay with the girls because she does not need to hear what I have to say.
“Umm, I’ll be okay in here, if you’re sure you don’t mind us all being in your room.”
Leaning down, I kiss her gently. “I don’t mind.” I lean further into her so only she can hear me whisper, “besides, soon enough you’ll be calling it our room.” Standing up, I look pointedly at Reilly who is eyeing the open walk-in wardrobe. “Stay out of the fucking wardrobe Reilly, unless you want to get fired on your first day.”
“Pfft, please, as if I would want to see your designer wardrobe.” She says while shaking her head.
The other three laugh as they all say in unison, “you so would.” Picking up my phone, I send Reilly a text. I don’t want Alyssa to know what I have to ask her friend.
Zac: Meet me in the kitchen now!
I wait for Reilly’s phone to beep before I shut the door. Walking through the living room, I see Bray and Dean both look up at me expectantly.
“Wait there a sec,” I say as I continue to the kitchen.
Putting a mug under the expresso machine, I touch the icon labelled sunshine. I may have already stored her preferred coffee method into the machine. I grab the bottle of vanilla flavouring and pour a good dose of it into the cup.
“You summoned me, boss?” Reilly says as she strolls into the kitchen.
Stirring the coffee, I hand it to her. “Give this to Alyssa for me.”
“You made her a vanilla latte?” she questions, scrunching her eyebrows together. Why the fuck she’s questioning this, I don’t know.
“It’s her favourite,” I say as a way of explanation.
“Oh, I know that, but how do you know that already?” she looks at me scrutinizingly.
“I pay attention when she tells me things” I say. As she reaches for the cup, I don’t release it straight away looking her dead in the eye I say, “I’m going to need a last name for Steven and what facility he was locked up in.”
“Why? He’s still in jail. I just called and checked. He isn’t the one who sent those flowers, besides it wasn’t his calling card. This one is different,” she says.
“Humour me and text me through those details. What do you mean this one is different?” I question.
“The card, it said Dear Alyssa, condolences on your future loss. I don’t get it, but it freaks me out Zac. Alyssa can’t go through this again. It took her two months before she would even leave the house by herself, and that was after Steven was locked away.”
“Nobody will
be getting to her, I won’t let it happen.” I say as I make my way out of the kitchen. By the time I reach Bray and Dean in the living room I have a text message with the details I requested from Reilly.
Reilly: Steven Johnson, sentenced to five years at Silverwater Correctional Facility.
“Who do we know on the inside at Silverwater?” I ask Bray and Dean as Reilly walks by us back to towards the bedroom.
I don’t miss the smile that appears when she pretends not to overhear. I look at Bray, who is currently staring at Reilly’s retreating form.
Slapping him across the back of the head, I say, “no, she’s an employee and a friend of Alyssa’s, for the love of god, just don’t.”
“You’re a bit late with your warning,” he smirks at me.
“Why, for the love of god, can’t you just keep your dick in your fucking pants for once in your life?”
“What can I say? I’m doing the female breed a kindness by letting them on my dick. The thing is a masterpiece, after all.” He laughs. Dean and I both shake our heads at him.
“Do not let this effect the club, or Alyssa. I won’t save you from her if you hurt her friend.”
At this Dean laughs. “I don’t think it’s Reilly’s heart is the one breaking,” he says looking pointedly at Bray.
“Shut up, my heart’s not broken. If she doesn’t want a go on the Bray train again, well that’s her bad luck, there are plenty of other hot redheads out there more than willing to take her spot.”
“Whatever you say man,” Dean says while shaking his head. Well, that’s an interesting development I will delve into at a later date. Bray being turned down, I don’t think I’ve ever seen that happen.
“Anyway, Silverwater, who do we know?” I ask again.
“A few, why?” Bray says. I tell them about the Alyssa being stalked, about what that motherfucker did to her, how scared she was. “Get the few we know a message for me, I will make weekly deposits into their funds account for the rest of their time if they make the fucker bleed.”
“On it,” Dean says, tapping away at his phone.
