“What are you going to do with the house?”
“You can sell it for me,” said June. “I’m sure Nathan would love to take on a few home improvement projects for your channel.”
Rebecca seemed to have run out of arguments. “It sounds like you’ve already thought it through, but you haven’t had any sleep. Are you sure you’re thinking clearly?”
June could almost see the wheels in her daughter’s head turning, trying to find a reason why she shouldn’t do it. “I think you’ve been looking after your mom for quite long enough. I’ve been thinking about this since we got here. Not this job specifically, but a change in lifestyle. Besides, you two can come visit. You said that this is one of the places you like to frequent, and your brothers might even come. They live closer to Utah than they do to Illinois.”
Rebecca sighed. “I might not want to come back. It’s been nothing but alpaca screaming every night.”
June chuckled. “With any luck, there won’t be any more alpaca problems.”
“I don’t know what Nathan will think about all this,” Rebecca said, shaking her head.
June was certain that despite how much Nathan liked her cooking, he’d be happy to have his wife back all to himself. Mothers-in-law, no matter how well-meaning, inevitably got on your nerves.
They turned back to Blanche.
“I’ll take the job,” said June.
“Oh, thank goodness. I have some things I need to prepare for you, but make sure you get some rest. Oh, and we need to move your motorhome to the host spot.” She looked at Rebecca. “Since I’m refunding your stay, do you think you could be so kind as to move Ronald’s trailer over to the empty field?”
“My husband could do it with his eyes closed,” said Rebecca.
“Good,” said Blanche. “Get some rest.” With that, she walked away.
“You know, I shouldn’t let you get away with this,” Rebecca said. “You got yourself kidnapped and you could have been killed.”
“Do you really think there will be alpaca thieves here again anytime soon? I think we’ve seen the most excitement this camp is going to have for a long time.” June looked out over the campground. “This will be a nice, quiet place to live.”
Chapter Thirty
Prince Albert hummed contentedly in the late afternoon sun. After such a long and harrowing night, he needed a nap, but the buzz around the area still hadn’t calmed, and he wanted to know what the humans were up to. For once, he didn’t focus on getting into the females’ pen. It was just good to be back, good to be home.
He watched as the bad human’s stable was moved, the one who had taken Penelope away. He stomped a foot in resolute anger.
The bad one had been the King of the Humans.
Prince Albert knew this because he had heard the King tell other humans what to do. And while they didn’t always like what he said, they usually obeyed. But kings were supposed to be better than that. They were supposed to be wise and kind rulers, not alpaca thieves. It was no wonder that the King’s herd had risen up against him and thrown him from his stable.
Something caught his eye. Another of the human stables roared to life and began moving. He caught sight of June inside. His heart lurched. Was she leaving? Had her interference caused her to be exiled from the herd as well?
He squeaked in protest. She had become his friend, and not just to him, to the entire herd. She had brought back Penelope. He held his breath, hoping the stable didn’t leave.
He thought over the events of the last few days. It was a good thing the new human had been here to help dethrone the King. The Pacifist had called her June, but he needed something better, a new title. He would have to talk to Agatha about this. June was not a good name for her, not after all she had done for his herd.
The stable slowly followed the road and stopped right where the Bad King’s stable had been. Was June taking his place?
Prince Albert honked in triumph. She would stay and not only would she be his friend, his ally, she would rule the humans. He knew now what her name would be and he didn’t even need Agatha’s help to come up with it. She was the Queen of the Humans now. His heart swelled with pride. He had helped her gain this throne. She would owe him a favor.
Perhaps he should use that favor for more apples.
No, he should save that favor for something … but what could be better than apples?
Approaching footsteps drew his attention. He hadn’t even seen Penelope sidle up to the fence. She was a beautiful sight. Oh, how he had missed her!
She cocked her head to one side. “It is good to be home, isn’t it?”
His heart ached, nearly overflowing with joy. He nodded in her direction. “I missed you.” How could he tell her how empty he had felt when she was gone? How could he convey the wrongness of his herd without her there? Would he have recovered if she hadn’t come back? He would have missed her, wondered about her every day.
He shook his head. Those were thoughts better kept to himself. It was the burden of the Prince to carry the weight of his grief. His head lowered. “I was worried for you. Are you ok?”
Penelope took a step. “I’m fine.” She batted her long eyelashes at him. “I wanted to thank you for helping me get free. The other girls told me what you did.”
Prince Albert stood proud. He held his head high and puffed out his chest. “It is my duty to the flock. Any male would have done his best.”
She ducked her head and lowered her lashes. “You were very brave.”
He pranced in a circle, showing off his masculine form. “Yes, I was brave and strong.” His head lowered just a bit, and he asked the question which had been weighing on his mind. “Is the cria ok?”
Penelope turned to the side, showing her extended belly. “The cria is safe, thanks to you.”
“But will it be born soon? We were worried that you would go into labor while you were in captivity.”
Penelope pranced back towards him, a contented look on her face. “I think with all the excitement lately, it will take its time coming.”
Prince Albert supposed that was for the best. Penelope would want to know that it was safe before giving birth.
A shudder ran through him. She hadn’t been safe. She’d been taken, and he’d allowed it to happen.
He watched Penelope return to the herd, surrounded by the other females who would watch and take care of her when the time came. The herd was whole once again. The cria was safe. His eyes drifted back to the human stables. He looked forward to new treaties between the humans, ones that supplied a steady source of apple slices for the entire herd.
The new Queen would make a just ruler and all would be right in the world.
THE END
Free short story for readers of Herd is the Word!
If you’re like me and you’re not quite ready to leave the campground yet, check out Yarn Wars, a free short story exclusive to anyone who has read my book.
It takes place between the Herd is the Word and Shear Terror, the second in the series. Here’s a little about it:
When residents try to pull one over on the new camp host, they get tangled in their own yarn.
June Winters is new to Castle Creek Campground. Worse, she's in charge and she has no idea what the rules are. When an argument breaks out over usage of the laundry room, no one is happy with the her compromise. She has a suspicion that there is more to this than meets the eye, and knows they're keeping secrets.
Can she uncover the truth before they decide that she's a pushover? More importantly, has she bitten off more than she can chew? Find out in this exclusive short story only for newsletter subscribers!
Just follow the link below to join June Winters in her first adventure as Camp Host!
Yarn Wars
About Herd is the Word
Thank you for reading my book!
If you enjoyed June, Prince Albert, and all the other characters, please leave a review or rating on Amazon, Goodreads, or BookBub. Reviews ar
e vital for independent authors like me, helping readers find and know what to expect from my stories. I appreciate each and every review!
If you aren’t part of my Honey Badgers Newsletter, please join the family! I release monthly free short stories, tell you about new releases, do cover reveals, and have all sorts of fun! As a thank you for joining, you’ll receive an exclusive short story that takes place on June’s first day as camp host. The story is called Yarn Wars and I can’t wait for you to read it!
Don’t forget to read Book 2 in the series, Shear Terror. June must solve her first murder mystery as camp host of Castle Creek Campground. An excerpt of Shear Terror can be found in the next chapter.
About Herd is the Word:
I can’t tell you how excited I am to share Herd is the Word with you! It has been a long journey to get this story into your hands and I am just so happy that you have found it.
I didn’t start out writing cozies. When I first decided I wanted to write, I followed in my husband’s footsteps by working on a fantasy series.
Despite being an avid reader and lover of fantasy, I struggled with creating a world and characters that seemed believable. I eventually came to a point where I had to either do another major editing pass or let the world go. It was a heartbreaking decision, but I knew that investing more time into a world I was no longer enjoying was not the right way to go. I needed something brand new to work on.
My husband suggested I try my hand at cozy mysteries and I was instantly in love. It was the fresh start that I needed, the exciting new thing that I just couldn’t wait to work on. The words came easier than ever before, and I was having so much fun with June, Prince Albert and the other characters that I haven’t looked back! I love playing in scenes that make me chuckle.
I spent hours researching alpacas and the more I read, the more I loved them. What originally caught my attention about the animals, though, was their fleece and the fact that it’s used to make yarn.
I’ve been crocheting for a few decades now. I also love to bake, sew, garden, and of course I love to read. Audiobooks are my preferred method, as I can do other hobbies and read at the same time, what is yours?
I take every chance I get to camp, travel, hike through nature, and I take lots of pictures of flowers. My husband and I plan on traveling around America in an RV once all our kids are out of the house. I also talk to my cats, almost as much as June talks to hers, though mine rarely pay attention.
If any of this sounds interesting, feel free to Follow me on Instagram where I share my passions.
All of that sounds like cozy mysteries would be my cup of tea, doesn’t it, especially camping cozies? It makes me wonder why it took me so long to discover how much I love this genre.
I feel like I have finally found my niche and, like June, I am definitely not ready to leave the campground. I have many more stories in the works, as well as dozen of ideas for future series. I hope you will join me in the journey!
Stay cozy,
Jenna Lynn Badger
March, 2020
Excerpt from Shear Terror
Book Two of the Alpaca My Bags Camping Capers Cozy Mystery series
Prince Albert hated getting sheared.
No! He detested it, and this time he wasn’t going to go along with it. He was the Prince of the Alpaca! Didn’t that mean he got to make decisions? It was his right to rule, and he had already decided that he would not go along with the human’s plans anymore. He wouldn’t endure the hide-tickling torment required to remove his fleece. No, he wouldn’t put up with it.
He trotted away from the human who held the buzzer in his hand.
The door to the barn was closed, the air stifling. Even though it smelled like hay, he didn’t like being indoors. The light in here was ugly and yellow, and even though it was still a bit dark outside, he preferred it. The sun would be creeping over the horizon soon. Alpacas did not belong inside human buildings. It was unfair to trap him in here, where it smelled like breakfast. He was hungry, but too nervous to eat.
“Come on, buddy. You’re going to feel much better when it’s done,” cooed Kurt Bryant. He wasn’t usually the one to do the shearing, but he was a likable enough fellow, and he was useful, too. He trimmed toenails, checked teeth and most importantly, made sure the alpacas had plenty of food and water. Maybe now he was in charge of the shearing, too. He had a small patch of fur under his nose and usually wore a big hat.
Apparently the hat was removable. The alpaca had thought that Kurt had an oddly shaped head when they had first met. One day he removed his hat and Prince Albert realized it was just an ornament.
Humans were quite strange.
Kurt’s hat was off now and the fur on his head was wet and dripping. He burped and a foul smell came out of his mouth, like he had eaten bad hay and gotten himself sick. Smelling him from far away was bad enough, but up close made the alpaca almost lose his breakfast, which he hadn’t had yet.
Prince Albert snorted to get the scent out of his nose.
The human was acting like he’d spun in too many circles, taking staggering steps. He put a hand on Prince Albert’s haunches.
The alpaca would have been more worried about his human friend but he’d seen him like this before. Sometimes at night, when he drank too much of the liquid humans called alcohol, he would get all dizzy like this. Maybe the human should just kush down on the hay and take a nap? That usually helped.
Kurt put down the buzzer and walked in a slow circle, seeming to find his balance a little bit better. Maybe he wasn’t as sick as he smelled. “Trust me, you don’t want to go a whole summer with all that fleece. You’ll be so uncomfortable and hot.” Kurt sounded as if he were uncomfortable and hot already even though he had no fleece to keep him warm, only a big patch of fur on his head and one under his nose. Neither of those could possibly be of any use in the cold winter months.
Prince Albert knew the human was right. He didn’t want to be hot or uncomfortable. He paused, letting Kurt reach out and stroke him.
“Your fur will just get longer and longer and it won’t look nice. It will look all tangled and matted. You won’t be nearly as handsome, but old and mangy. You don’t want that, do you?” His words were slurred and Prince Albert had a difficult time understanding them.
The prince honked. Of course he did not want that. He was the only male of this entire herd. He should look manly and handsome, not matted.
“We’re going to have to do it sooner or later.” Kurt stopped talking. He made a weird noise and a bad smell came out of his mouth again.
This was worse than the alcohol, Prince Albert decided. There was something wrong with Kurt. He was sick, and now that he looked at him there was something wrong with his eye. It was all purple and swollen. He nudged his friend, trying to tell him to get some rest. All the alpacas knew that’s how to get better.
But Kurt just paused, taking a deep breath and then he said, “The sooner it’s done, the sooner you don’t have to worry about it.”
Prince Albert took a deep breath of the stifling air. Maybe right now was not a good time to risk having his fleece shaved. He didn’t want it to come out all patchy, and he wanted his friend to feel better. He caught the scent of something else. He sniffed the air. A human he didn’t recognize was nearby. His ears pricked up, and he retreated into the corner of the barn. He had learned the hard way that not all of the two-legged creatures could be trusted. Given how strange Kurt was acting, Prince Albert didn’t want to take chances.
The new human opened the door of the barn and walked inside, letting in a breath of fresh air. They left the door open and marched up to Kurt. This one had white hair on their head, a very unattractive color for them. Part of their hair was dark, but the ends of it almost matched his fleece, which made it look all the more strange, as if the human couldn’t decide what color its fur was supposed to be.
Prince Albert watched the two carefully. He did not need another human in here. It was bad enough dealin
g with Kurt. But maybe they could help. He kept to his corner and watched.
Kurt turned to the new-comer and showed them all of his teeth. He didn’t hum, as you are supposed to do when you are content, so maybe he didn’t like this other human. “What are you doing up so early?”
The other human did not sound as happy. They made big gestures with their arms as they talked and their voice was very loud.
Kurt replied in a soothing tone, as if trying to calm the one with the ugly white fur.
Prince Albert felt frustrated. Didn’t this human see that there was something wrong with Kurt? They should tell him to sleep and get better. But they didn’t do that. They were here to cause trouble. He shuddered. Kurt did not need trouble right now.
He glanced at the open door and couldn’t help but think that if the new human had left the gate open, there would be one barrier between him and the females.
The newcomer did not calm down. If anything, they sounded even more irate.
Kurt was bigger than the other one. In normal circumstances, he could handle himself, but Prince Albert didn’t trust this new human and Kurt was in no condition to deal with any kind of trouble.
It was usually best to stay out of human affairs, but this one with the white fur might be a problem.
Prince Albert opened his mouth as if to scream, but what if the one with the new one saw him? Why was this human here? He stood frozen, unsure of what to do. Kurt seemed so calm that maybe Prince Albert was panicking over nothing. Surely Kurt would scream if he needed help, wouldn’t he?
The new person poked Kurt in the chest, and made a screaming noise of their own.
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