by Ella Miles
He hesitates.
“Sit, or I’ll make you sit.”
He huffs like he knows I won’t.
Try me, old man.
When he sits, I notice the wrinkles around his eyes have deepened, the gray in his hair now covers his entire head of hair, even down to his beard. He truly looks like an old man. His muscles have weakened through the years. If he were any other of my men, I would retire him or fire him depending on how loyal he’d been to me over the years. But I can’t do either without pissing off Kai and breaking the rules since I’m required to run everything by her as co-Black for now.
I shouldn’t even be having this meeting without informing her. But this conversation will stay between us. This conversation will not leave this room.
Mr. Miller folds his hands in his lap while he spreads his legs, taking up the entire chair. He seems relaxed, but I can read people easily. He’s not relaxed. He knows I could end him as easily as I snap my fingers. He’s afraid of me.
“Why?” My entire body goes into that one word. One question has never been this important.
He laughs like I asked the most ridiculous question. “That’s not the question you should be asking. You already know why I sold her.”
I growl. He’s not even going to apologize for what he did. He made the decision as easily as he decided his breakfast this morning.
“It’s the question that matters to me. You hurt her. You answer to me.”
He chuckles again. “Why? Because you love her? You don’t care about my daughter any more than I do. Rumor is you sold her to our enemies. You don’t give a fuck, so stop pretending you do. If you need to take out your vengeance on someone, fine, take it out on me. But don’t act like you are any better than me.”
I storm toward him and kick him hard to the floor; he falls off balance and slams into the floor beneath him. My boot lands on his chest, pressing hard enough I know it’s hard for him to breathe.
“You will tell me everything. Or I will kill you.”
He spits at me. “I will tell you nothing more than what you deserve. And you don’t deserve the truth. You already know why I sold her, the same reason your father tortured you night after night. To toughen you up in order to win the empire.”
My eyes grow wide with anger. “And you know how I felt about my own father.”
He snickers using too much of his air as he does. “You fucking slaughtered him.”
“What makes you think I won’t do the same thing to you?”
“Because as much as you pretend to be cruel, you aren’t. You didn’t actually sell my daughter, and you are too much of a pussy to hurt her.”
I press my foot into his neck, shutting him up, but I’m careful not to leave any visible markings. I don’t want Kai to know I roughed up her father before I let her meet him.
I study him and realize he’s bluffing. He knows nothing about the game. He didn’t trick me into selling Kai to Milo. He’s not working with Milo. He knows nothing. He’s just pretending to know something in order to stay alive.
Fucking pussy.
“Listen to me. If it were up to me, I’d kill you right here on the floor of this grungy office and never think about you again. But it’s not up to me. You’re Kai’s father. And I know the decision has to be hers.”
He tries to speak, but I dig my boot in deeper.
Self-control. Keep it together. Don’t give into the anger.
“This is how it’s going to go. At dawn, Kai and I are going to board this yacht so she can get her questions answered. You will not let her know you and I spoke. You will answer all of her questions, honestly. You will apologize for everything bad you have ever done to her. You will be a father. You will promise to protect her from now on and never hurt her again. And you will promise to stay out of her fucking life. Do you understand?”
I ease my foot from his throat.
He coughs.
“Or what? You’ll kill me? You already told me you wouldn’t do that for Kai’s sake.”
My face reddens as the anger explodes through my body. “I will kill you if you don’t do as I command. I’ve fucked up plenty of times where Kai is concerned. I’ll deal with her wrath if I have to. But I vowed to not let any man hurt her ever again. That includes you.”
He scowls. “You wouldn’t. You are too much of a pansy.”
I shrug. “Maybe. Maybe I wouldn’t kill you.” I press my boot harder into his throat, no longer caring that it will leave a mark. I watch his face turn purple and blue from lack of oxygen. And then I lean down close like I’m telling him a fucking secret.
“But there are worse things than death. Just ask your daughter about that.”
I release him and watch as the bastard wiggles on the floor, begging for oxygen. I only gave him a few seconds of what he put his daughter through and he could barely handle it—the coward.
I walk to the door, ready to return to Kai who I had to leave sleeping naked in my bed to come talk to this asshole.
“You think you got everything figured out,” Mr. Miller says.
I turn as I reach the door. “I do.”
He shakes his head. “You don’t know nothing. You don’t know the fucking truth. You don’t know the pain coming both of your ways. There is so much you don’t know, boy.”
Old feelings stir when he calls me, boy. The only other person that ever called me, boy, was my father. And I hated him for it.
I slam my fist into his face, watching the blood spurt from his nose as I do. So much for not letting Kai know I was here. She’ll know the second she takes a look at her father. But I’m done hiding secrets from her, and I don’t regret one second of my time with her father.
13
Kai
“Are you ready?” Enzo asks me, as I roll up my sleeves on the buttoned-down shirt I decided to wear.
I wanted something that made me feel powerful, as an equal to my father and Enzo, but I’m not sure it mattered what I wear. I have huge butterflies bouncing around in my stomach.
How can I ever be ready to face a father who sold me?
I nod when I finish rolling my sleeves up, revealing enough of my scars, but not too much.
I want answers.
I want an apology.
I don’t want to show him the pain I experienced. He doesn’t deserve my pain.
Enzo holds out his hand instead of taking mine like he usually does. He’s going to let be the one in control today. If I don’t want Enzo with me, all I would have to do is ask him to leave. He’ll be right by my side if I want him to, or he’ll remain only as a guard protecting me but not interfering.
I want to face my father on my own. But I could use Enzo’s help getting to that point.
I take his hand that instantly warms me.
We walk up the decks of the yacht and meet Langston and Zeke on the top deck. Both of them are solemn in their dark jeans and black T-shirts. They look like they are about to do battle. And I have no doubt they know as much as I do about my father, possibly more.
I notice the other yacht anchored next to us and the ramp that leads from ours to theirs that Langston and Zeke have been guarding.
Enzo gives them a nod, and they silently traipse across the ramp. Enzo and I follow with my hand still gripped in his. When we reach the yacht my father captains, all the men stop as if we are royalty. They practically bow at us as we walk.
I don’t feel like a scared little girl anymore. I feel like a woman about to deliver her vengeance.
We reach a door, and our group stops. Langston and Zeke face away like they are ready to jump in front of a bullet to protect me. All the men on this yacht work for Enzo, so I don’t know what we have to fear here. I think they are more likely here to intimidate my father.
“Your father will meet you here,” Enzo says hesitating outside the door waiting for me to invite him in. But he already knows I won’t. I need to face my father on my own. Enzo doesn’t protest or ask to enter with me.
&
nbsp; He leans down and kisses me on the cheek. “You got this.” He doesn’t say he’ll be here if I need him. The confidence in his voice tells me he doesn’t think I will need him.
I open the door and leave the only men who care about me outside while I enter the room where I’ll face my father.
The lock of the door behind me sounds like a closing to my soul. I’m trapped in this room that smells like blood and musk and men. A room my father and the rest of his crew enter to handle business and probably beat the shit out of each other when one of them fucks up.
I take a deep breath in and out, filling my lungs to prepare to speak to my father. My neck still throbs, but my voice is easier to use now. I don’t even have to wear the gauze covering anymore, but the stitches are starting to itch like a motherfucker.
There is a large oak desk with an executive chair I know I’m supposed to sit behind. It would give me control over the situation. Sitting behind that desk would make it clear I’m the boss and my father is nothing but a peon who needs to follow my orders.
But he’s still my father, and I don’t want to face him with a desk between us. So I pull the two chairs on the opposite side of the desk apart until they are facing each other and take a seat in one and wait.
My stomach does flips while I wait, which isn’t long. The door opens, and my father is standing in the doorway only minutes later. His face is bruised, and there is dried blood on his nose and the collar of his shirt. His hair looks disheveled, and his neck is heavily bruised.
He looks like he got in a fight mere hours ago. I notice Enzo standing behind him, staring at him with intense disgust. Like he wants to put a bullet between his eyes, instead of letting him into this office.
My eyes return to my father. Enzo did this. It has his mark all over him. He met with my father before he let me speak with him.
I should be angry at Enzo for controlling my life, but I’m not. I’m grateful. My father deserves every bit of pain he’s in and more, and I’m not strong enough to deliver the same level of punches Enzo can.
“Take a seat,” I command, not getting up from my own chair.
My father stiffens before the door is closed behind him. Then he takes a seat opposite me, crossing his legs like we are meeting for a casual lunch instead of meeting to discuss why he sold me.
He folds his hands in his lap, and for the first time, I realize how old he looks. He’s in his late sixties and still working, but I doubt he can handle the physical nature of this job much longer.
Questions fill my head—so many questions. But I don’t ask them. I let the silence fill the room, letting the silence stretch and unnerve him.
“What are you doing?” he asks.
I cut my eyes to him. “Thinking of all the ways I could kill you.”
“You wouldn’t kill your own father.”
“Maybe not, but I’m not sure I consider you a father anymore. Fathers don’t sell their daughters. Fathers don’t lie to their daughters their entire lives.”
“That’s what you are pissed at? That I didn’t tell you about the stupid game? The empire you could inherit if only you were strong enough?”
“No, I’m pissed I thought I grew up with a father mourning the loss of my mother, doing everything he could to survive, and instead, I was raised by an evil sack of shit who didn’t prepare me for my own future.”
“Ask your fucking questions, I have work I need to get back to.”
I lean forward, putting all my anger into my stare. I consider sitting in silence so I can piss him off further, but I can’t stand to be in this room with him any longer than I have to.
“My mother’s hospital bills, are you really in such debt that you can’t afford a house bigger than that trailer?”
“No.”
Fuck, this is going to gut me.
“Then, why did we live in a trailer?”
“Because I wanted to toughen you up. I didn’t want you to become a princess like how Enzo was raised. You learned how to handle yourself in that trailer.”
I close my eyes, willing myself to ask the next question.
“Did mom really die from cancer?”
“No, your mother was an alcoholic. She drank too much and killed herself.”
My mouth falls open as my heart breaks. I don’t remember my mother. All I know is the story. She fought so hard to stay alive for me that we incurred an incredible debt we could never repay. It was a lie. All of it. A fucking lie!
But then every word out of my father’s mouth is a lie.
And it doesn’t shock me that my mother didn’t care about living for me either.
I want to get out of here. I want to get back to the Savage with Enzo and pretend I’m an orphan, that my father died along with my mother back then. But I have one more question I need to ask. A question I already know the answer to, but I have to ask it. I need to hear it from his lips.
“Why did you sell me?”
His eyes look into my soul, and I know it’s not out of love or compassion or sorrow for what he did to me. He doesn’t tear up thinking about it. He doesn’t regret putting me through the pain.
He hurt me because he wanted me to be stronger. He hurt me because he thought I was too weak to win without experiencing pain.
“I sold you so you would have a chance to win. I did it for you.”
“No!”
My single word vibrates through the room until it consumes both of us.
“No, you didn’t sell me so I had a chance to win. You sold me because you are evil and cruel. You sold me so if I were to win, I could give you a better life. Promote you in the ranks, and the Miller line would continue on ruling for another generation. You didn’t do this for me. You did this to me. You hurt me. Broke me. Caused me more pain than my body could physically handle, until I learned to shut it out.”
I think back to Enzo’s father. I don’t know what he did to prepare Enzo to become Black, but I know it wasn’t kind. It was personal and dark and cruel. But at least he was a father. At least he didn’t pretend to be something he wasn’t and hide behind a lie. He spoke the truth to his son and showed him his darkest side, while my father pretended all this time.
“You are nothing but a coward. There were other ways to prepare me that didn’t involve selling me. Teaching me how to wield a gun and weapons. Teaching me how to fight. Educating me on how this business runs. Preparing me for every scenario. You didn’t have to sell me!”
A sob escapes my throat, and I curse myself for showing weakness to this man.
“Are you finished?” he asks.
I grit my teeth together to keep from launching myself at him. “No. You haven’t even apologized for what you did.”
“And I’m not going to. You had to be sold.”
“Why? Why was that the only way your twisted little brain could think to prepare me?”
He leans forward, glaring right back at me. His nostrils flare, and his anger spreads from his face to his bones.
“I’ve been in this world a lot longer than you, Katherine. You don’t understand the dangers you will face. You don’t understand how strong you have to be to become Black.”
“One, don’t call me Katherine. My name is Kai.”
He shakes his head.
“And two, you don’t understand the strength required to be Black. You failed, remember? Enzo’s father won, not you. You have no right to think you know better than me the strength it takes.”
My father sighs, falling back in his chair in defeat.
I win.
But it doesn’t feel like a win. It feels like pain.
“I don’t want to ever see you again,” I say.
“Fine, then stop summoning me and I’ll never see you again.”
It’s not enough. I want him out of my life forever. I consider going outside and retrieving Enzo’s gun, but then I think better. That’s not who I am. I’m not cruel. I will not kill my father.
“I want you to leave Miami. I want you
to move to California or Canada or Belize or Ireland. Anywhere that’s hundreds of miles from me. Anywhere not connected to the sea or Miami.”
He cocks his head. “I can’t exactly leave Miami or the sea when I’m a captain.”
“You aren’t a captain anymore. You’re fired.”
That gets his attention. His face goes pale. “You can’t fire me.”
I cock my head to the side. “Did you forget the rules you helped to create? While the games are being played, Enzo and I have equal control of the company. And I’m currently in the lead one to nothing. So I have plenty of power. And I’m firing your ass, effective immediately. This ship’s next mission will be to get your ass to the farthest away land, away from me.”
“You can’t fire me,” he whispers like I just ripped out his heart.
“I just did.”
I stand, effectively dismissing him. I never plan on seeing my father ever again. It’s not the same as killing or punishing him for what he did to me, but it’s enough.
He stands too, facing me. And I can tell he has more to say, but it’s too late for an apology. I won’t change my mind about firing him.
I walk to the door and open it. Enzo’s eyes meet mine, searching to see how much pain I’m in, but the pain is gone. My father no longer exists to me.
Enzo smirks when he reads my face.
“My father is fired. Tell the men they are to drop him off at port as far away from here as possible and to promote the second in command.”
Enzo raises an eyebrow.
I step closer to him and whisper so only he can hear. “And if you have a problem with me ordering that without discussing with you first, we can have a discussion about you meeting with my father first and beating the shit out of him.”
“I don’t have a problem with you making the decision. It’s yours to make.”
I nod. “And thank you for beating the shit out of my father. He deserved every punch.”
He grins.
My father walks to the door where I’m standing. He glares at Enzo like he’s the devil. He is, but he’s my devil. The kind I can trust to protect me. The kind who fucks up and then makes up for it. Not the kind that sells me and pretends that is somehow saving me.
