When their ice cream arrived, they all dug in, still each in their own thoughts and not talking much.
"Well," Mama said, after finishing off her single scoop of maple nut ice cream, "that was tasty, but I don't think it helped much, J.R."
"Sorry, Mama," he said, "I wanted to get away from the mess in the house and thought maybe we could work on a game plan."
"A game plan?" Julianna repeated. "What do you mean?"
J.R.'s hand rested on Junior's arm. "I keep telling you, Junior. You're not alone anymore. Mama and I are here for you. I'll even bet there are others in town and at church who are here for you too."
"And the Savior's here for you, Julianna," Mama said, holding her hand over her heart. "He never leaves you if you want Him here."
"I appreciate what you're trying to say, both of you. But I don't know what to do. I can't imagine how any of this is happening and every time I think about it, it gives me a headache."
"Look, we don't need to worry about that now," J.R. said firmly. "Let's focus on the house. Now that you have the time to help me, we'll go at it like gang busters and get as much done as we possibly can."
"I suppose that is the silver lining. I'll get to work on the house again."
Mama quietly clapped her hands together. "This could be a real blessing in disguise."
The next day dawned sunny, and Julianna wanted to take advantage of every moment. She pulled on her work jeans and a bright pink tank top. Adding an old Cooper Springs High School sweatshirt, she pulled her long dark curls into a high ponytail and slipped into a pair of old sneakers. A quick wash of her face and brush of her teeth and she was out the door of the old trailer, headed to the kitchen.
The smell of sausage and eggs filled the air and she took a deep breath. Mama was up and cooking breakfast. Smiling big with a "good morning" on her lips, she stopped short when she saw it was J.R. cooking and not Mama.
"Oh."
J.R. turned away from the stove. "Good morning to you too."
"Good morning. Is Mama okay?"
"Sure, she's taking a bath while I get breakfast ready." Julianna didn't miss his eyes looking her up and down and she felt a little self-conscious with her old work clothes. "You look like you're ready to attack our project head on."
"What's on the agenda for today?"
"Well, the weather looks like it's cooperating for the moment. I'd like to get the rest of the chipped paint sanded off the outside and see if we can paint this baby."
"Don't you want to put the new windows in first?"
"Normally, yes, but we've got to work with the weather. We can put new windows in when it's raining if we have to, but we can't paint in the rain."
"Sounds good to me. I haven't worked with a paint sprayer before, but you tell me what to do, and I'll do it."
The smile on J.R.'s face got bigger. He turned the burners off on the stove and walked right up to Julianna. "If I tell you to marry me," he whispered, "would you?"
Julianna pushed him away and laughed carefully. "Now J.R., you know it doesn't work that way."
"It could," he said.
"Well it doesn't," she said more firmly and walked over to the table to sit down.
J.R. chuckled. "Can't blame a guy for trying."
Mama walked in at that moment. "Trying to do what, J.R.?"
Julianna froze. J.R. looked at her intensely and seemed to be making a decision before turning to address Mama. "Trying to talk Junior into marrying me."
Mama looked between the two of them with a thoughtful expression on her face. "Well, well. When you two decide to get along, you take it quite seriously, don't you?"
"But I said no," Julianna interjected. Of all the people in the world, Mama would understand why she couldn't marry J.R.
"And I told her I'd keep trying," J.R. added.
"Is that your final answer, Julianna?" Mama asked.
"I...I'm not sure. Maybe."
Mama's eyes softened, and J.R. was grinning again.
"Well, you think on it long and hard, girl," Mama said. "Don't let the past dictate your future. When you see happiness within your grasp, you've got to grab on tight and don't let go."
Julianna didn't like the attention. She certainly wasn't going to change her mind here and now in front of Mama and before breakfast. "Let's eat."
Their earlier exchange lightened the mood better than the ice cream the evening before and although Julianna was toying with the idea of accepting J.R.'s offer, she would have to come clean about senior year and she didn't think she was up for it. With all the weird stuff happening at Charlie's and her living situation still uncertain, she had enough on her plate for now. Maybe once the house project was done and Mama was moved into her retirement home, she could spend some time focusing on J.R. and where their relationship might go.
If ever there was a time for Julianna to have Mama's gift of second sight, or whatever it was she had, this was it. Caught between enjoying the time she had to help J.R. paint the outside of Mama's house and wondering what in the world was going on at work, she felt like her brain was going to explode.
J.R. managed to mix hard work with lighthearted flirting and the day sped by. Soon the house had been scraped, sanded, and repainted a soft butter yellow, the perfect complement to the glorious fall leaves surrounding the property; yellows, golds, and reds mixed with the evergreens of the Douglas fir. It was a start, anyway. By dinner time, the house glowed with new paint and they were planning their strategy for installing the windows.
"Hey," J.R. said, "there's a fifty percent chance of rain tomorrow, but if the weather decides to cooperate, we can do the windows. We'll have to paint the white trim by hand, but it should go fairly quickly. We can always attach the shutters later."
"And if the weather doesn't cooperate?" asked Julianna with a smile.
"I guess we'll do it in the rain."
They laughed together, and Julianna felt some of the burden of both the past and the present lift from her shoulders. This not being alone thing was pretty cool. After cleaning out the rented paint sprayer and returning it to the hardware store, dusk had fallen, and they were both hungry.
Mama pulled out all the stops that night for dinner, making her famous Parmesan Chicken and homemade rolls. Julianna wondered if Mama would part with her recipes when she moved and leave them to her. Even without the personalized training, just having the recipes would be a step in the right direction.
The right direction.
Julianna still wasn't sure which way that was, but the more time she spent with J.R., the more she wanted her direction to follow his. Spending extra time that night studying forgiveness in the scriptures, Julianna had a little more hope that J.R. could handle what she hadn't yet told him and that maybe—maybe—they had a future together. She smiled when she thought about Mama's advice about not letting her past dictate her future. Hold onto happiness. Isn't that what she said? Julianna closed her scriptures and said a heartfelt prayer for guidance, direction, and maybe some answers too.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
J. R. pulled the last nail from the window frame on the last old window upstairs. Easing the old frame out of its sixty-plus-year resting place, he handed it through the opening to Junior. She carefully set it down and lifted the new window to be installed. J.R. admired her strength and gumption. Not many women he knew would be up for such a strenuous project. Her help had been invaluable, and they had accomplished much more than he had expected.
He had thrown out the supposed schedule a week ago and was simply grateful for forward motion. What to do about his business in Portland had yet to be decided. Asking Junior to marry him wasn't in his original game plan, to say the least, but every day spent with her convinced him more that she had to be a part of his life. Maybe it was time to leave Portland behind and make Cooper Springs his home once again?
A little checking on the Internet late the night before proved to him there was enough going on here and in the surrounding communitie
s to keep him busy. And if that didn't turn out to be enough, bigger towns were fairly close by.
"You got it?" asked Julianna, as she balanced the new window in the open space.
"Hang on to it until I get the first couple of screws in." J.R. picked up the cordless drill and drove two screws into the holes in the flange surrounding the window. The old trim that he had carefully removed before they painted the siding would cover the flange and once it was painted the soft white Mama had chosen, and they added the shutters, the outside of the house would look brand new. Of course, there was still the back deck, the roof, and the new front door, along with all the interior left to do. J.R. sighed and reminded himself that renovating a house was like eating elephant; you could only do it one bite at a time.
"That's it," he said when the last screw was in place.
"I'll take the old window down to the garage," Julianna said through the glass, hefting the window into a tight grasp and heading for the stairs. "Meet you there."
J.R. allowed the drill to slide down the side of the ladder until it rested on the ground before he let go of the cord. He stepped down the ladder and wrapped up his tools. The garage had been cleared to make room for the boxes and most of the furniture from the first floor, along with the new appliances. They parked the wheelers behind Julianna's trailer and stuffed all the old equipment to the back of the garage to get everything to fit. Stacking the old windows along the side of the garage wall, he took pictures with his phone and planned to post them on Craigslist. Old windows were popular with crafters, especially in the fall. He decided to keep one and make a frame for Mama for her new apartment with family photos in it as a memento of her life here.
Julianna trudged out the back door, and J.R. ran up to her to give her a break. "Here," he said, "let me take it from here."
"Thanks. They're heavier than I thought."
"But you did a great job helping today. And that deserves a reward."
Julianna's eyes sparkled. "What kind of reward do I get?" she asked.
"Well, it's a little generic, but I think you'll like it. Come over here." He set the old window against the wall and took her to the back of the garage, out of sight of the house. "Mama may have enjoyed the little kiss I gave you the other day, but we don't need to advertise."
Julianna reached behind his neck and linked her fingers. "Generic, huh?"
"Only in the sense that it can be given multiple ways." He put on his best serious face.
"Really. Care to demonstrate?" Her eyes sparkled, but she responded to his solemnity.
"I would love to." He started with a short peck on her cheek. "Something like this is for children and grandmothers, or people you don't care that much about."
Julianna smiled and nodded. "Should I be taking notes?"
J.R.ignored her comment and moved to her forehead, placing a gentle kiss there. "Something like this is for friends that you want to be more but aren't yet."
"I see."
"Then there's real kisses, but they're pretty across the board too."
"Oh, how?" she said, furrowing her brows.
"Well, there's the "I'm late but I need to kiss you good-bye one." J.R. pressed his lips against hers but let go immediately.
Julianna smiled. "I'm liking this game."
J.R. let a small smile slip out. "Then there's others," he said, his voice turning husky and seductive. "Like this," he said as he tenderly kissed her temple and worked his way down her cheek to just below her ear. "And this." Gently he nudged her chin to give him better access to her neck as he scaled short sweet kisses along her jaw until he reached the corner of her mouth. "But the best kind are these."
When he took her mouth this time, he indulged in a lingering onslaught that parted her lips and invited her to join in completely. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pushed her lightly against the back wall of the garage. Her response threatened to bring J.R.'s heart to bursting as he soaked her in and made promises without words. Warmth invaded his soul, and he drew Julianna closer until he could feel the racing of her heart through his shirt. The play of her hands in his hair sent radical tingles shimmering down his spine and a low moan escaped his throat. Pulling away reluctantly, he returned to her neck and slowly let her go. "Thanks for all your help today."
Julianna clung to his arms as though it was the only thing holding her up. She lazily opened her eyes and the dreamy expression in them pierced J.R.'s heart. He pulled her back into a warm embrace and simply held her until the chill in the evening air started to infiltrate his t-shirt.
"Maybe we should go see what Mama has prepared for dinner. It's getting kind of late. "
"Maybe you should kiss me like that every day," Julianna said with sly smile.
"I could do that. Every day. Forever. Just say the word."
Arm in arm, they headed for the back door. Never had anything felt so right.
Getting away from the store for a few days, Julianna felt rejuvenated or maybe it was J.R.'s kisses. Even though she still felt the weight of an unspoken accusation hanging over her head, being able to help on the house project, not having to leave early in the morning, and taking time to talk with Mama and J.R. as long as she wanted were blessings she could cherish. The silence from the store unnerved her a little, but whenever it did, she reminded herself she wasn't alone, and she wasn't guilty. Innocence was a strong testimony. Reliving J.R.'s kisses from the day they installed the windows caused waves of heat to tear through her body. She couldn't stop thinking about what it would be like to be married to him and be with him all the time.
With J.R.'s business firmly rooted in Portland, she contemplated her limited visits there. They hadn't been pleasant, and she dreaded the idea that she would have to figure out how to deal with ridiculous traffic and crowds of people. She wondered if she could talk J.R. into settling in one of the more outlying areas so she didn't have to go into the city.
Thoughts of suburban cottages, little kids running around, and taking care of J.R. swirled in her mind while they replaced the window trim all around. Julianna happily dragged her paint bucket up the extension ladder to apply the trim color on the second floor. The weather had held off, making liars out of the local weathermen, and the outside of the house was looking wonderful. She wondered if J.R. and Mama would change their mind about selling. It would be a shame to go to all this work and not live here. Her daydreams did an about face and she could envision them living in the house together. Julianna floated away in her thoughts while she painted.
"Hey Junior," J.R. called from below. "When you get done with the last window, come find me. I have an idea I want to discuss with you."
"Sure," she replied. "It'll be a minute."
"Whenever you're done." J.R. disappeared around the corner of the house and Julianna wondered what he needed help with.
Twenty minutes later, with the last window finished, she stepped off the ladder, set down her brush and can of paint, and stepped back to admire her work.
Stepping up from behind, J.R. wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled her neck. "You do great work," he whispered.
Julianna smiled. "You do too."
"What would you think about an excursion tomorrow?"
"Where?"
"I need to run into Portland and check on a couple jobs. I thought maybe you and Mama would like to get out for a while. We can go to my favorite restaurant for lunch and maybe even stop for dinner on the way back. If you like, I can drop you and Mama off at a mall or shopping center while I check on my subs."
"I'd like to see your projects. Could we stay with you instead? We'd keep out of your way."
"You could never be in my way. I would love to show you what I'm working on."
"Sounds like a plan, Stan."
"We'll have to leave really early."
"I can do early, especially if I can snuggle with you all the way there." Her heart did a little dance at the prospect.
J.R. winked. "Good. Let me help you clean up and we'll stop
for today. Maybe we can check out new faucets for the kitchen and bathroom while we're in the city."
"We should check Mama's list. I'll bet there's more we could get in one trip and save ourselves lots of little trips here in town."
"Great idea." J.R. took her paint brush, and she followed him to the hose bib. Making sure the paint lid was secure on the gallon can, Julianna stretched her shoulders and arms. She was exhausted, but it was good, honest hard work and she loved it.
Once the painting supplies were put away and the ladder was safely lying against the garage wall, they went inside.
More aromatic scents wafted from the kitchen. Julianna figured Mama was in her element, cooking for them every night. She seemed to enjoy taking out old recipes and sprucing them up with this and that. One of these days, Julianna swore she was going to learn how to cook like Mama.
Pleasant conversation and tasty food blessed their evening. Mama was excited about how nice the outside was looking.
"Wait until you see it with brand new back deck. You'll think it's a brand-new house," J.R. said.
"And when the trees leaf out and the flowers bloom in the spring, it will look like a picture postcard," added Julianna.
Mama paused. "Except I won't live here then," she said, her voice sadder than any other time she talked about the retirement home.
"But you'll be able to enjoy the fact that someone is loving all the updates to the house, right?" Julianna held her breath waiting for Mama to respond. She didn't mean to talk about a time when Mama wouldn't be here. She'd been engrossed in her daydreams; she didn't think before talking. "I'm sorry Mama, I didn't think."
Mama looked at Julianna with bright eyes. "It's okay, honey. I understand. Time marches on and...well, it is what it is."
Julianna heard J.R. release his breath and wondered if he had been concerned about Mama's feelings now that the house was shaping up. When the new kitchen finished off the renovation and the house felt revitalized, would she be able to leave it all behind? Maybe it would have been better if they had moved her out and then done the updates. Feeling bad for bringing the energy at the table down, she was glad for their trip to Portland tomorrow. Perhaps they all needed to get away.
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