"The reason," he said very slowly, "that a sausage cannot walk is thatit has no legs. You can understand that, can't you?"
"Oh, certainly!" replied the Prince, politely.
He was extremely anxious not to say anything to make the Wizard angry.
"Well, then," returned the Wizard, "don't pretend that you can't, that'sall."
For some time longer the Wizard made tatting in silence; then once againhe spoke.
"The reason," he said gravely, "that a horse has no trunk is because itis not an elephant. Can you see the philosophy of that?"
"Yes, your--" "Majesty," the Prince was about to say, in his eagernessto be polite; but he changed his mind just in time, and saidcourteously, "Yes, your Wizardship."
This appeared to please the Wizard, for he bent his head three times andinvited the Prince in to tea. The table was already spread; and seatedabout it were the old lady Vance had seen herb-gathering, and nineblack cats with green eyes, peaked caps, and nice white napkins undertheir chins. The Wizard placed a chair for the Prince.
"This is my wife," he said, waving his hand toward the tiny old lady."She is a professional witch. She eats nothing but grasshoppers gatheredwhen the moon is full."
The Wizard here lowered his voice mysteriously and bent toward Vance.
"Economical," he said, "very economical. She hardly costs me a groat ayear, except for her high-heeled shoes; those come dear, but she musthave them, being a professional witch, you know. Now, as to these cats,how many lives should you guess they had among them, eh?"
"I have heard," replied the Prince, "that every cat has nine lives, so Ishould think that there must be eighty-one lives here."
"You'd be wrong, then," said the Wizard, "for some of these cats haveonly one or two lives left. I keep 'em, you understand, so that whenfolks lose their lives, all they have to do is to come to me and I cansell them new ones from the cats."
"Do the cats like it?" asked Vance.
"They don't mind," replied the Wizard. "Anyhow, they know they've allgot to come to it. When the last life is gone, a cat turns into a wind;you've heard them of a March night, yowling about the castle turrets."
"The moon," said the witch, speaking for the first time, "being probablyif not otherwise added to this whose salt, magnifying."
"You are right, my dear," said the Wizard, "as you always are. The boy_is_ better off in bed."
Upon this the Wizard left the table and led Vance to a neat littlebed-chamber, where he bade him good-night. The Prince, having opened hisbox to give his family some air, lay down and enjoyed the first night ofslumber in a bed which he had known since leaving the palace.
The next morning, after breakfasting with the Wizard, the witch, and thecats, the Prince was called into the garden and given a spade.
"Just dig awhile, as we talk," said the Wizard, seating himself, "andsee if you can find any Greek roots. My wife wants some for a philtershe is making."
"Tintypes," observed the witch, "catnip promulgating canticlesconcerning emoluments, producing."
Vance stared; but the Wizard, who was evidently accustomed to this oddsort of talk, answered quietly:
"You are right, as usual, my dear. He must be very careful not to cutthem in two with his spade."
The Prince took the spade and began to dig, though not very hopefully.The truth was, he had never been at all successful in finding Greekroots himself; and besides he was longing to ask the Wizard for thecharm which should restore his family. However, he dug away bravely andsaid nothing till the Wizard spoke to him.
"I suppose," said the Wizard, at length, "that, as to your family, youknow the rule for simple reduction, don't you?"
"Yes," said the Prince, doubtfully, "I do if that page wasn't torn outof my book. However, I could learn it."
"Learn it, then," said the Wizard; "and when you have learned it, useit."
"But, if you please," ventured the Prince, humbly, "they are alreadyreduced to the lowest terms. I don't wish to reduce them any more."
"All right, then," replied the Wizard, crossly; for the truth was,that, having a variety of affairs on his mind that day, he had forgottenthat Vance's Court were pygmies, and was thinking they were giants, anda wizard never likes to find himself mistaken. "All right, then; don'treduce them. I'm sure I don't care what you do."
"Oh, don't say that!" begged the Prince, with tears in his eyes. "Pleasedon't act as if you didn't care! Oh, your Wizardship, I've come so farto find you, and I've met such unpleasant people, and such horriblethings have happened to me on the way, pray do not refuse to help me nowthat I have found you at last!"
"Well, then," returned the Wizard, "be polite, and do as I tell you. Doyou find any roots, by the by?"
"Not one," said the Prince, leaning on his spade in despair.
"That's bad," said the Wizard. "I would sell the charm to you for oneGreek root."
"Oh," cried the Prince, "my tutor has some, I know. His head used to befull of them; and unless they have grown so small that he has lost them,I'll be bound he has them still."
Upon this the Prince hastened to open his box, and, to his greatdelight, succeeded in obtaining from his tutor several Greek rootswhich, though small, were of good shape and in fair condition. Thesebeing given to the Wizard, and by him handed to the witch, the Princewaited eagerly for the charm to be told him.
But the Wizard had apparently no mind to speak. He whistled a fewmoments, and then, drawing a string from his pocket, began to make acat's-cradle over his long crushed-strawberry fingers.
"I've sent a message by telegraph to the court cat," he announced. "Gothrough that white gateway, and you'll come to the high-road. It is thesouthern boundary of Jolliland. Your way is straight. By sunset you willbe at the castle. The cat knows all."
XVIII
The Prince thanked the Wizard, though not very warmly: for, to tell thetruth, he did not much believe that the Wizard had sent a message to thecat; and even if he had, Vance had in times past so hectored andtormented that poor animal that he felt some delicacy in asking a favorfrom her now. However, he kept on in the direction pointed out, passedthrough the white gate, and started forth merrily enough along thehigh-road. He was disturbed, indeed, by some fears of the wicked GeneralBopi; but he had, in spite of himself, some faith in the CrushedStrawberry Wizard, and he meant to be very cautious in approaching thepalace.
By sundown, as the Wizard had promised, the young Prince found his longjourney ended, and beheld at last the dear old home where he was bornand had always lived till his own misdoings sent him forth. Howbeautiful it looked to the worn and footsore Prince, with its velvetyterraces, its clear blue lake, marble statues, and crystal fountains,lovely flowers, waving ferns, and shady trees, and, above all, the greatgolden palace itself, its turrets flashing and glittering in the rays ofthe setting sun! The Prince could have wept for very joy.
Everything about the palace seemed wonderfully still. The white swansslept upon the lake, and the peacocks stood like jewelled images uponthe terrace.
Peeping about cautiously for any signs of the wicked General, the Princemade his way softly through the shrubbery till he was very near thefront entrance of the palace. Still no signs of the pretended king. Thecourt cat, sleeker than in the days when Vance made her life a burden,sat alone on the upper step, placidly washing herself.
"You may as well come out from behind that almond-tree," she said, "forI see you plainly enough."
At this the Prince came out, still cautiously looking about him, and sethis box down upon the steps.
"Dear cat," he said politely, "how do you do?"
"Humph!" replied Tabby, rather unpleasantly. "'Dear cat!' How touching!"
"I've been gone a long time," ventured the Prince.
"That may be," returned the cat; "the days have passed swiftly enoughwith us here. We have not grown thin in your absence."
"That is true," the Prince assented rather shamefacedly, and hehastened to change the subject. "Where is everyb
ody?"
"Beheaded," replied the cat, briefly; "that is, all but the King."
"Do you mean General Bopi?" asked the Prince. "You know I have the realKing here in my box."
"Don't quibble!" retorted the cat, sharply. "A king is known by hisdeeds. If you have seen the way he's been beheading people right andleft, I think you'd call him something more than a general. What few hehas left alive have fled from the palace and are hiding in the woods."
"And where is the Gen--King himself?" asked Vance, uneasily.
"Oh!" replied the cat, carelessly, "he's 'round."
"'Round where?" asked Vance.
"'Round here," the cat replied.
"I don't see him," said the Prince, with a start, as he looked about himon all sides.
"No?" said the cat. "That's because you can't see through me."
"How very strangely you talk, cat!" exclaimed Vance. "I don't know whatyou mean."
"Well," returned the cat, "you know those funny bonbons?"
"Yes," murmured the Prince, hanging his head a bit and blushing.
"One rolled under the sofa," the cat observed thoughtfully.
"Yes," said Vance, "I remember that one was dropped and I couldn't findit."
"After the telegram reached me from the Crushed Strawberry Wizard,"remarked the cat, "I rolled the bonbon out into the middle of thefloor. It was a pretty pink bonbon, and the King, coming into the room,saw it and gobbled it up."
"Well," exclaimed the Prince, breathlessly, "what then?"
The cat put out her tongue and licked her chops.
"He was very tender," she said.
"You ate him?" he asked breathlessly.
The cat placidly nodded her head, her whiskers twitching with theremembrance of her feast.
"Then," cried Prince Vance, joyously, "my father is King again, or willbe when he is made big enough. You say you had a telegram from theCrushed Strawberry Wizard. Tell me, do tell me, dear cat, what it said."
"I can't till midnight," said the cat, "or all will be spoiled, and thecharm won't work."
XIX
Before he left home the Prince would have stamped about and made a greatuproar at being obliged to wait even a minute for anything he wanted;but of late he had learned, among other lessons, the lesson of patience;so he neither stormed nor cried, but entering the palace seated himselfwhere he could see the great hall-clock and watch for midnight.
He was so weary, however, that he could not keep his eyes open, andpresently he was as sound asleep as a dormouse. At length the cattouched him on the shoulder, her claws pricking him so that he sprang upin a hurry.
"Wake up!" said the cat; "the clock will strike twelve in sevenminutes."
"Why, have I been asleep?" asked the Prince, rubbing his eyes.
"It looks like it," replied the cat. "Why did you leave the Court shutup in the box?"
"To tell the truth," the Prince confessed, "I was afraid they might berunning about the floor in the dark and--something might eat them bymistake."
"Well," the cat answered, with a look as near a blush as a cat can cometo such a thing, "you may be right. One never can tell what may happen.It is now almost on the stroke of twelve, and we must make haste. Runout to the terrace and see if the peahen has laid an egg. If she has,bring it in here to me; and be very quick!"
Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, the Prince hastened to do as he wasbid. He found an egg, indeed, and rushing back to the palace reached thehall just as the clock sounded the first stroke of twelve.
"Break it exactly across the middle, and do it with three blows," thecat commanded.
The Prince obeyed, and from the shattered fragments of the shell, justas the last stroke of twelve ceased, out stepped the Fairy Copetta, assharp, fresh, and brisk from top to toe as if she had just been made,and not in the least as if she had found her quarters in the peahen'segg either close or confining. She shook out her petticoat with a brisklittle flirt, hopped lightly down from the table, and hit the Prince atap on the head with her cane.
"Well," she said sharply, "how about the Blue Wizard? Do you like him aswell as you thought you should?"
"I don't know," stammered the poor Prince, decidedly taken aback by hisgodmother's sudden appearance. "Did I say I liked him? I hadforgotten--I mean I don't like him at all, if you please, Godmother."
"Oh!" exclaimed the old lady, mockingly, "don't you, really? Yet, if Iremember rightly, you quite longed for a visit from him a while ago.Well, then, how about the giant of Bogarru and the Funny Man, bothintimate friends of mine--did you like them, eh? Did you find them wittyand agreeable? Did they treat you with great respect because you were areal live prince, eh?"
"You know they did not," cried the Prince. "I must say, Godmother, thatyou have strange taste in choosing friends."
"Each to his liking," responded Copetta, lightly. "I dare say, now, thatyou found more pleasure in that stupid jelly-fish, or that dismal brassmonkey, or that crooked man,--and _he's_ a beauty, by the way!"
"I did like them," replied the Prince, stoutly; "they were so good tome. Are they, too, friends of yours, Godmother?"
"Why, yes," said the fairy, her bright eyes twinkling elfishly, "I thinkI may say that they're rather intimate with me."
"I didn't know," ventured Vance, rather timidly, "but they might all beyou, Godmother."
"Perhaps you think," she answered tartly, "that I am a sort of livingmultiplication-table, or that I have as many lives as a cat. By the way,can you bound the kingdom now?"
"I ought to be able to bound it," the Prince replied; "I have been quitearound it on foot."
"Well," returned his godmother, acidly, "I dare say it hasn't hurt you.That reminds me; have you had enough of it?"
"Oh, please, Godmother," cried the Prince, "I have had enough ofeverything but kindness; and oh, Godmother, if you only would tell mehow to turn my people back again, indeed, there is nothing I wouldn'tdo. Believe me, dear Godmother, I'm a very different sort of boy fromthe one who wouldn't learn the boundaries, and wanted to know the BlueWizard; I am, indeed."
"Humph!" sniffed the fairy, though secretly she was not ill pleased withhim, "you're a much dirtier one, at all events. Have you washed yourface since you've been gone?"
"I'm afraid I haven't washed it very often," confessed the humbledPrince. "You see, I've had so much else on my mind, Godmother."
"Bah!" exclaimed the fairy. "Go take a bath!"
"But the Court, Godmother," pleaded the Prince, timidly; "they must bevery tired of being small."
"Tut, tut," cried the godmother, sharply, "how you do harp on onestring, to be sure! 'Tis very ill bred of you. However, as it's not foryourself, I don't mind telling you that it's a very simple matter whenyou once know how to do it. They were facing each other when theyshrank, were they not?"
"Yes," said the Prince, blushing.
"Turn them all back to back, then," said the fairy, snappishly. "Ishould think any fool might have known enough to do that long ago."
Vance opened his box, and trembling with excitement arranged hisrelatives and friends in two rows, back to back.
Pouf! The effect was magical! Quicker by far than they had grown small,the little folk regained their former size. Then, indeed, confusionreigned. Such gabbling and chattering and running about; suchhand-shakings, embracing, and congratulations; such beratings andcuffings of Vance because he had made them small, and then such kissingsand caressings because he had made them large again! Never was thereknown such a mighty confusion and uproar in any royal palace before orsince.
"But, Godmother," ventured Vance, timidly, when the excitement had diedaway enough to allow a body to begin once more to think,--"But,Godmother, if you please, may I ask you one question?"
"If it's a short one," replied the sharp old lady, "and not _too_foolish."
"Well, then," asked Vance, "I would like very much to know, if youplease, what we should have done if the peahen had happened not to layan egg?"
"Pshaw!" said the go
dmother, crisply. "Stuff!"
University Press: John Wilson & Son, Cambridge.
Prince Vance: The Story of a Prince with a Court in His Box Page 6
