her mom, hoping Tia would say yes.
“I said I would talk to her, honey,” Carina said to her daughter for the
fourth time. Carina sipped lightly on her tea, noticing her daughter’s intense
stare.
“Mom, I know you,” Rina said. “You’ll mention it, but then tell Tia
you don’t want to go when I know you do. Family is everything to us. You
taught us that,” Rina argued. “And I know Grandma and Papa are being
idiots—”
“Hey,” Carina cut in.
“They are and you know it,” Rina said. “I love them, but they are.
Besides, today isn’t about them. We have cousins and aunties and uncles
whom you get along with perfectly fine that will be there. Don’t let
Grandma and Papa take this day away from you.”
When did Rina grow up? She’d be 13 soon enough. Carina smiled,
proud of her daughter’s maturity. Many of her family did support her. After
they’d found out about Tia and her, they sent a bunch of lesbian cards in the
mail. Silly ones. Their funny way of saying they loved and supported her.
“All right. I’ll really talk to her. But please know this will be hard for her
too.”
“I know,” Rina nodded.
“Who wants donuts!” Tia shouted coming inside the house. She
walked through the kitchen holding out a box. Her grin was big and Carina
could tell Tia loved spoiling her kids.
Carina narrowed her eyes. “Sugar?” she said. “They’re already about
to be filled with sweets,” Carina pointed out.
“Yeah, so why not start the day off on sugary fun,” Tia explained.
“I concur,” Johnathan said grabbing two donuts.
When did he learn that word? Carina thought. Her kids were growing
up way too fast.
Tia placed the box on the counter, pulling out a chocolate glazed
donut. It was Carina’s favorite and Tia knew it. She waved it near Carina’s
face and grinned. “I suppose you don’t want any then,” Tia grinned.
Carina narrowed her eyes playfully. “Evil,” Carina muttered under her
breath.
Casually, Tia brushed her lips over Carina’s and then handed her the
donut. “How are my four favorite people?” Tia asked offering her arms to
take turns giving each of them a hug.
“Good,” was all Michelle could utter, mouth half full of her donut.
Her eyes looked bigger than her stomach, staring at the donut as if it was a
quest she had to complete.
“Can I hang out with you instead?” Johnathan asked Tia randomly.
Tia frowned and snuck a peek at Carina for an explanation.
“No!” Rina rushed out. She looked to Carina ready to pout if she
didn’t ask soon.
Carina hadn’t mentioned her family’s picnic to Tia, convinced she
wouldn’t want to attend. The last thing Carina wanted to do was make Tia
feel like she had to face her parents glare only to be judged and possibly
mistreated for being in love with their daughter. Besides, Carina had no
intention of going until Rina made it very clear she wasn’t going to attend
without them. Carina knew Rina looked forward to this every year and
didn’t want to take that away from her.
“It’s my family’s annual picnic,” Carina finally stated. Her smile was
tight and forced, seeing her kids’ nervous eyes wander between the two of
them.
“The one you invited me to last year?” Tia asked.
Carina nodded.
Tia stood quiet for a long moment. “Then don’t let me stop you guys
from missing all the fun. I knew the kids were headed to their grandparents.
Just didn’t know it would be that kind of a wild adventure.” Tia was being
strong for the kids. She looked to them with big eyes. “You three don’t look
ready to leave,” Tia pointed out.
Tia was getting better at giving silent suggestions that alerted Carina
she wanted to talk privately.
“That’s very true,” Carina agreed. “You three should be getting ready.
I know your grandparents will want you and all your cousins over for a
sleepover so pack an overnight bag.”
Michelle slid out of her seat with her donut sitting on the napkin she
used as a plate. She looked stuffed and sighed. “I can’t finish it,” she said as
if disappointed with herself.
“That’s all right. I’ll finish it for you,” Tia assured.
Rina gave her mom one last plea reminder with her eyes and then
headed toward the stairs.
Johnathan seemed to be the only one left hesitating to get up. His
behavior had improved in the last several months, but today he was
struggling to speak, keeping his head down. “I’d rather stay home.”
“Johnathan, the video games can wait,” Carina stated. Every chance
Johnathan got, he asked to play. Since summer break started, Carina had
been pushing him to go outside more and socialize. “Right now I need you
to go upstairs and get dressed.”
“Fine,” he blew out harshly and stormed up the stairs.
Carina shook her head. She’d let him calm down for now and discuss
things later.
Finally alone, Tia took the seat closest to Carina and positioned to
face her, making it evident that she wanted to talk.
“I know what you’re going to say,” Carina said. “I should’ve told
you.”
“Why didn’t you?” Tia asked, reaching in to grab hold of Carina’s
hand.
Carina sighed. “Because my parents haven’t treated you with any
respect, and I didn’t plan on going.”
“I’d never tell you to disown your parents for me,” Tia said. She
appreciated how much Carina cared, but she didn’t want her to one day
regret not speaking to her parents again because of their relationship.
“First, they’ve done a great job at making me feel disowned all on
their own.” There was bitterness in Carina’s tone but she was working
through it. One day at a time. “Second, you’re someone I’m very proud to
be with. And I’ll never regret not going where we both aren’t welcomed.”
Carina’s attempt at maintaining composure was quickly failing.
Tia smiled and nodded. “Do you want to go?” Tia asked.
Carina gave it some thought. She took in a long breath and leaned
into her seat. “I’ve always loved going. There are so many who still support
me and my life. But it won’t be the same,” Carina said honestly. “I have all
the family I need in this house,” Carina said, staring into Tia’s eyes. “The
rest can just see me when my parents aren’t around.”
Tia nodded. “But?” she said, knowing Carina well.
“But Rina really wants both of us there. I explained to her why she
shouldn’t expect you to jump for joy at the idea. Maybe she’s just being a
teen, ready to face her grandparents for social justice or something,” Carina
joked.
Tia chuckled. “Maybe,” she said rolling her eyes. “I can see her now
holding up a protest sign, demanding equality.”
They both laughed.
Carina silenced first, staring down at their linked fingers. “I’ll tell her
it’s all too much and—“
Tia shook her head, preventing Carina from continui
ng. “No!” she
said adamantly. Their eyes locked. “I chose all of you. That meant those
kids up there too. I fell in love with you because not only are you an
amazing woman—passionate and honest—but also because you’re an
amazing mother.” Tia squeezed their linked fingers. “For whatever reason,
Rina needs us there. So, I say yes and to hell with your narrow-minded
parents.”
Carina snorted. “Understatement.” She looked into Tia’s eyes for the
longest moment. A tear slid from Carina’s eye and marked a passage down
her cheek. “I love you.”
*
Tia
The entire car ride to Carina’s family picnic felt emotionally draining,
but Tia held it together for the kids and Carina. Despite Carina putting on a
brave face too, Tia wasn’t oblivious to her fears. Tia was fortunate to never
be treated differently or unwanted by her father when she came out to him
years ago. More than half of Tia’s gay friends had parents who no longer
talked to them for choosing to be their true selves. Tia admired Carina’s
strength. To have been happily married to a man and create three children
with him only to openly explore her feelings for a woman after such a
devastating loss took a lot of guts.
Carina’s hand squeezed Tia’s thigh, drawing her attention toward their
present surrounding. The car was parked in front of a volleyball court
someone must have set up for the event.
Tia noticed the huge picnic shelter with a banner stretched across it. It
read 30th Castillo Annual Family Picnic. Tia’s brows rose. “You weren’t
joking when you said this was tradition.”
“Yeah. Normally, they don’t put up some big banner. Only every 10th
anniversary,” Carina explained.
Tia twisted to see the kids were already out of the car. She hadn’t
realized she’d zoned out long enough for them to exit.
“We can leave whenever,” Carina promised.
“Same goes for you too,” Tia said. She opened her passenger door
and smiled before exiting the car. If they lingered any longer Tia was afraid
they’d never get out.
Carina walked around the car, meeting Tia on the sidewalk, and
offered her hand.
Tia arched a brow and nodded toward many of Carina’s family
already taking notice of them. “You are a badass!” Tia said with pride.
Carina snorted. “I’m only walking up to my family with the woman I
love just like any other couple here would do and has done.”
Tia took hold of Carina’s hand and smiled. Her heartbeat could almost
be heard with every step they took. Relief slowly settled into Tia’s
bloodstream when she noticed most of Carina’s family eager to greet them.
Tia recognized a few from last year and from Michelle’s birthday party.
Their kind and supportive eyes made Carina let out an audible sigh as she
hugged her relatives.
Carina introduced Tia to everyone that surrounded them and
conversation began to flow immediately. When Carina’s sisters approached,
it was evident to Tia that despite what Carina thought, she’d needed to be
here too. Tia understood how much Carina loved being a part of a big
family. For Tia, it had always been only her and her father.
There was well over 40 people here with just over a dozen kids of
various ages running around. Carina had warned her that today would
include a lot more people than last year and Tia suspected more would
arrive.
“Would you like something to drink?” Carina’s sister Sandra asked.
She opened the ice chest near where they’d sat.
“A Sprite would be great actually,” Tia answered.
Tia knew that in the beginning there had been hesitation in Sandra’s
support. She was relieved that whatever objections she had before were
dissolved. Casually, Tia noticed from the other end of the picnic shelter
Carina’s parents sitting with their backs turned to them. A few other
members of Carina’s family sat with them, probably gossiping about Tia’s
presence.
“I hope you know I’m happy my baby sister was able to open her
heart up again,” Gina said. She’d been observing Tia for several long
heartbeats.
Tia gave Gina’s words some serious thought. “I don’t plan on going
anywhere.” This time Tia snuck a peek at Carina who was also glancing her
way. They locked eyes and smiled. Carina had fallen into a deep
conversation with her other sister and cousins.
“No one expects you to,” Gina said, pulling Tia’s attention back to
her.
Tia gave her a furtive glance and chuckled lightly. “I doubt that.”
‘Well,” Gina said, apologetically. “They don’t count.”
“Yes they do,” Tia admitted. She wasn’t trying to challenge Gina’s
words. She knew Gina was only trying to make her feel comfortable. “But I
can live with that as long as Carina can.”
“You’re right and I’m thankful Carina has you by her side,” Gina
said.
“What are you two talking about?” Carina asked playfully, moving
around the bench to sit next to Tia.
Carina followed Tia’s brief line of sight and sighed. “I didn’t come
here for them. I came here to see the people who have my back no matter
who I am. And my kids deserve to still have their family.”
“Amen to that,” one of Carina cousins cheered, holding up her soda.
Everyone followed along and cheered, continuing their conversations with
lighter topics for the next hour.
Tia could see why Carina loved her family so much. She’d never been
apart of something like this herself and only hoped she’d be able to share
more moments like this for all the years to come.
When Carina finally stood to guide Tia to meet more of her family
that had arrived, they were instead greeted by Rina rushing to their side
with a look of bad news to report.
Chapter Nineteen
Carina
“What’s wrong?” Carina asked immediately. She knew her daughter’s
expressions well enough to know it involved one of her siblings.
Just as Rina was about to speak, one of the boys about Johnathan’s
age walked up with tears in his eyes and a bloodied nose.
All the adults took in the boy’s appearance as his father called out to
his son, using his shirt to stop his nose from bleeding. The father, Piero, was
one of Carina’s distant cousin’s she only saw during events like this. Carina
frowned, already sensing where this was headed. More of the kids walked
up with stories eager to tell.
Tia noticed Michelle and called her over. Michelle moved swiftly to
Tia’s side, hiding her body from the other kids by standing behind Tia.
The boy started sobbing, telling his dad what had happened.
Carina ignored the boy and looked around for Johnathan. “What
happened?”
“Where is your son?” Piero called out to Carina as if she answered to
him.
“Back off,” Sandra ordered.
Carina continued to glance around in search of Johnathan. The more
time went by the more concerned Carina became. “Rina, where
is your
brother?”
Tears flooded Rina’s eyes. “I don’t know!” She rushed out.
This time Tia spoke up. “I’ll go check the playground,” she said,
running in that direction.
“He hit me,” the boy staggered through a frustrated breath.
“You deserved it,” Rina argued, defending her brother.
Almost three months without an outburst. Carina thought Johnathan
was doing better. He’d been smiling more than ever and generally at peace
with all he’d endured. He must’ve been provoked.
“No kid should be hitting anyone. Especially my son,” Piero argued.
Carina noticed her parents approaching, sensing the trouble.
“Why do you think he deserved it?” Carina asked Rina.
Michelle began to cry now. Carina moved toward Michelle and knelt
beside her, soothing her daughter. “What’s wrong, honey?” Carina asked
softly.
She looked at the boy who’d been punched in the face by Johnathan.
“He was saying mean words to me and Johnathan told him to leave me
alone but he didn’t.”
“That’s a lie,” the boy hollered.
Carina could see Tia coming back without Johnathan and gradually,
panic began to suffocate her.
“NO, it’s not,” Michelle argued with defiance. “Just like last week
when he and his older brother kept picking on Johnathan calling him a
homo.” Michelle said the last word with confusion.
“I never—”
The boy tried to argue, but Piero cut in. “Shut it.” He looked to Carina
with embarrassment. “I’m sorry. My son clearly crossed a line.”
Carina was no longer focused on hearing what happened, watching
Tia jog back without Johnathan at her side. Worry began to creep even
closer, filling her lungs. “Nothing?” Carina asked Tia when she approached.
Tia shook her head.
“Is this why he didn’t want to come today?” Carina asked her eldest.
Rina nodded.
Carina groaned, wishing she would’ve noticed something earlier and
asked questions. Right now that didn’t matter. She couldn’t afford to panic.
“We need to find my son,” Carina said.
Everyone agreed, Sandra organizing everyone to split up and search
the entire park. This was the last thing Carina expected to happen today.
She needed Johnathan to be safely found.
Endless as the Stars Page 17
