by JA Low
“I just couldn’t go through with it,” I whisper. Sienna looks at me strangely then she starts to giggle.
“Evan, it’s okay, most men suffer from erectile dysfunction at some point in their lives. You’re just not as young as you use to be.”
What! What the fuck is she talking about?
Sienna starts to laugh, actually she begins to snort before she bursts out laughing completely. “Your face is priceless, Evan.”
I snatch her hand and place it against the thin material of my suit pants, letting her feel my hardening cock. “Does that feel like I have a problem?”
Sienna’s cheeks burn brightly under my heated touch.
25
Sienna
Sebastien is entertaining, funny, attentive, sexy and all the things that should be utterly tempting. I must be stupid to be putting him in the friend zone. The women in the club look like they are ready to devour him at any moment. But after a little awkwardness on his arrival we soon fall back into our old flirty friend routine and the night is spent on the dance floor having fun with our friends.
Excusing myself from the dance floor to go to the ladies, I am walking down a dark hallway when I hear arguing coming from a darkened portion of the hall.
“You fucking bastard; coming here with her then sneaking off with some other chick while she is on the dance floor. Give me a reason I shouldn’t fuck you up?”
That was Evan’s voice, he sounds pissed. What the hell is going on? Popping my head down the darkened hall, my eyes grow wide seeing Evan holding Sebastien by his shirt and yelling at him.
“Evan, stop,” I yell, walking toward them. Hearing my voice, Evan lets Sebastien go. Ignoring Evan, I walk up to Sebastien.
“Are you okay?” I ask, looking at his crumpled suit.
“Of course, everything is fine,” Sebastien replies, straightening himself up and giving me a smirk as his eyes fall on Evan.
“I just found your date in a booth with his arms around another woman while you were on the dance floor. You don’t deserve a creep like him.”
It’s sweet that Evan is trying to protect me, but I’m not his to protect.
“I'm so sorry, Sebastien.”
Sebastien shrugs, gives me a kiss on the cheek and then walks away.
Good idea because I was about to go nuclear on Evan.
“How the fuck are you not pissed at him?” Evan snaps.
Taking a couple of deep breaths, I try to calm myself down.
“Because, if you must know, I told him I only wanted to be friends.”
Evan stills at my words. “Why?” he asks.
“Why? Does it matter why?” I respond, balling my hands into fists as I pace around the room.
“Of course it does, tell me why?” he questions, his blue eyes staring at me.
“It doesn’t matter, nothing matters. I am sick of this Evan,” I yell, waving my hands between us.
“What, us?”
Groaning at him, I can’t believe his naivety. I’ve had enough of this back and forth; the constant mind fucks of this non-relationship. I’m not a fucking teenager anymore, I’m a grown woman; things shouldn't be this complicated.
“There is no ‘us’, Evan. That's what you don’t get. We fucked a couple of times, and yeah it might have been good, but that was it. Whatever was between us has run its course,” I shout, my body shaking from anger.
I can see the fire burning in Evan’s eyes. Before I know it, Evan has me pushed up against the wall, his chest moving up and down quickly from his heavy breathing. “I don’t like watching you with other people,” he growls into my ear.
My stomach pitches and rolls at his confession. “Well, there really is nothing you can do about it.”
Without another word, his lips capture mine in a searing kiss. All the anger I had toward him is now working into that kiss. I am so sick of this man running hot and cold when it comes to me. I bite his lip as I fight for the upper hand. The kiss is wild, angry and hot as Evan’s hands roam over my body finding my bare ass and pinching my soft cheeks.
My hands find the zipper to his suit pants and I start to unzip them. I’m not sure what is happening but we are both feverish for each other. His fingers find my wet center and plunge deep inside of me; his hot kisses make me moan. Finally releasing his cock from his pants, my hands stroke it hard and rough making him bite my lip in appreciation. Picking me up, he presses me hard into the wall. I wrap my legs around him and with one massive thrust; he enters me vigorously, making me scream as I feel him stretching me. His thrusts are desperate; we are both silent as we each take each other, never breaking our kiss until we are both coming.
Exhausted, our foreheads rest against each other’s as we slowly try to get our breathing under control. I realize I can still feel him inside of me; I still in panic. Fuck! I push him away from me letting my feet fall to the floor. I can feel his come sliding down my leg; fuck, fuck, fuck. Watching as he zips himself up, I look around frantically for something to clean myself up with. Remembering my underwear in his pocket, I dip my hand into his pocket pulling it out and wipe myself clean as quickly as I can.
Evan’s eyes are watching my movements then finally he catches on. “Fuck, Sienna, we didn’t use protection,” he announces, rubbing his hands over his head.
“Just fucking great. Like my night couldn’t get more fucked up,” I shout, throwing my dirty knickers at him, hitting him square in the chest. “Just stay the hell away from me, Evan Wyld.”
Pushing him away I run toward the restrooms. Collapsing onto the toilet, my mind is freaking out. What the fuck have I done?
Fuck Evan and his wonder dick.
Fuck Evan and his mind fucks.
Fuck men.
The tears are now running down my cheeks. It takes me some time to gather and clean myself up the best I can in a nightclub bathroom. Plucking up the courage to leave my little cubical I hope that Evan is not waiting outside for me because I have well and truly had it with him.
Popping my head out into the hallway I find it is quiet. I walk calmly back toward where the rest of my friends are, pick up my things and whisper to Vanessa that I feel sick and want to go back to the apartment. Quickly looking me over she nods saying she wants to come with me. We say goodbye to Isla and Derrick and we head out into the night.
“You want to talk about it?” Vanessa asks, as we walk toward the car.
“Not really. I just want to go home get lost in some trashy TV show and forget about tonight.”
Ness gives me a tight hug before jumping into the car. It isn’t long until we make it home to our apartment. We say goodnight to each other as we each drift off toward our bedrooms. After a quick shower, cleaning Evan off of me, I mentally curse myself over and over for being so stupid. Why the hell did I let this man get under my skin so much? Grabbing some supplies from the kitchen, I head back to my room and start flicking through the channels until I find something of interest; a couple of moments later there is a knock at my door. Thinking it is Vanessa, I tell her to come in.
“Sienna,” I hear him say. That voice is going to drive me mad.
“Get out,” I yell, as I jump out of my bed and head toward him.
“Sienna, please, we need to talk.”
Pushing against him, I can feel the tears threatening to fall from my eyes.
“Just leave me alone, Evan. Why the hell can’t you leave me alone?”
His arms wrap around me hugging me tight. My tears fall and I silently sob in his arms. He holds me, comforting me in silence until finally I stop crying and look up into his blue eyes.
“You need to leave now, Evan.”
He seems upset at my request.
“You need to leave me alone, please just leave me alone. I can’t do this anymore. Just let me go, okay.”
Evan looks shocked at my words. He slowly nods his agreement and makes his way to the door. “I'm sorry, Sienna.” And with that, he shuts the door behind him leaving me in tears onc
e again.
26
Evan
Home sweet home, I thought walking through the doors. It’s been a while since I've been home. The ring box is burning a hole in my pocket. It is the right thing to do. Hailey deserves it after everything we've been through. I know I haven’t been there for her as much as I should have, but the band has just taken off and we are getting more and more media exposure. We’ve even been asked to fill in on the festival tour at the last minute – it is our big break. But I knew Hailey wasn’t dealing well with the miscarriage, and if I am honest, neither was I.
I love Hailey, we’re high school sweethearts; she's the love of my life. But we were given a shit hand when we lost our baby. I was excited at the thought of being a dad even though I wasn’t ready to be one. While I was away she lost the baby early in the pregnancy and I couldn’t get time off to see her, so instead, like a dick, I decided to self-medicate with alcohol and drugs and went a little crazy on tour, nearly getting myself kicked out. But I'm back now to let her know that I'm sorry that I wasn’t there for her over the last couple of months and that I want us to get married, to become a real family and have her travel with me on the road with the band, no more time apart.
I took the first flight out from LA to Houston as soon as the tour was finished. I wanted to surprise her when she woke up; with me on my knees asking her to be my wife. Slowly creeping through our house, making my way to the bedroom, I push open the bedroom door. My heart is racing with excitement and nervousness. It had been too long since I had seen her. Opening the door further, there she is, lying in bed. But my eyes are drawn to the second figure in the bed with her. I step closer, not believing my eyes, because my Hailey couldn’t possibly have someone else in bed with her. As I did, the floorboard creaks alerting them to my presence.
“Evan, fuck. What are you doing here?” Hailey screams, waking up the second person in the bed. My eyes grow wide when I realize who it is. Kevin, my best friend, the man I asked to look after her while I was away, the man I trusted.
“You fucking bastard,” I roar, launching myself at him.
Waking up with a start, my heart is racing. I try to work out where the hell I am this week; my body's bathed in sweat from my nightmare. Fuck, I haven’t dreamt about Hailey in years, why the hell am I starting to now? Sienna! Fuck. I scrub my hands over my face in disbelief. The past couple days since Paris, Sienna has been avoiding me. I’ve tried texts, emails, face to face. I even sent her flowers. Everything has been ignored. I miss her. I fucked up big time in Paris. Never in my life have I forgotten protection and now there could be a chance that I’ve knocked her up, even though she told me that it would be highly unlikely because she's on birth control. But the thought that Sienna could be pregnant is driving me crazy.
Maybe that’s why I’ve started dreaming of Hailey again; I'm worried that the same thing might happen to Sienna. It would destroy me to lose another child. I'm older, wiser now, and the thought of having kids doesn’t scare the shit out of me as much as it did in my early twenties. But being a rock star isn't the life for a kid or a wife.
“Hey, dickhead, stop moping, we’re in fucking Amsterdam,” Finn says, grabbing me by the shoulders. “You okay?” he queries, looking at me with concern on his face. I nod that I’m okay as we walk along the hotel’s hallway toward the lifts. We’re heading down to the lobby where the other guys are waiting.
“Are things not so good for you and Sienna?”
My eyes look at my friend with gloom. “Yep, it’s all gone to shit.”
Giving me a knowing nod as I believe he’s getting the same treatment from Isla as I am from Sienna.
“Women, man, they will drive you crazy but we wouldn’t have it any other way,” he says, a bright white smile crossing his lips. The man could be a damn Abercrombie and Fitch model with his all-American football star look. Instead, he is a rock star.
“Come on, it’s boys night tonight. We're going to celebrate by hanging out in the red light district that Amsterdam is famous for,” he says excitedly, giving me a hard punch in the arm.
Sounds good, might get myself half-baked on some special cookies they have here.
Lounging in the darkened bar in the middle of the red light district, Derrick is not looking very impressed being surrounded by naked women all night. Currently, I have a naked brunette gyrating on me giving me a lap dance, my dick is not interested, no matter how hard she tries. Finally, the dance is over; she makes me motorboat her tits as a finale, much to the delight of the boys. I raise my beer toward them plastering a fake smile on my face.
The night continues like this for the next couple of hours. I have noticed over the course of the evening that Derrick is glued to his phone with a frown permanently stuck on his face. Usually, he loves a boys night, especially when he tricked Christian into partying in a gay bar where he was mobbed by a group of over enthusiastic drag queens – it was pretty funny. Christian complains he still has nightmares of that night.
“Everything alright, Derrick?” I ask, while the others are getting their lap dances.
His dark eyes are looking at me then back at his phone, and then back at me. I can see the worry written across his face.
“Fuck, is everything okay?”
Frowning, he hesitates then shows me his phone.
There was a glossy photo of Sienna’s ex with his mistress in a full page spread in some magazine smiling with their newborn baby. Fuck!
“Has Sienna seen these?”
Derrick’s face drops. “Yeah, and it’s not pretty.”
My heart sinks.
“She’s gone off the rails, the girls are trying to get her to go back to the hotel but she won’t go, she won’t listen to anyone.”
Jumping up and out of the booth my heart begins to race. I need to get to her and make sure she is okay. She shouldn’t be drinking if there’s a chance she's knocked up.
“Come on, I'm going to get her.”
Derrick looks at me in shock before quickly jumping up after me.
“Y’all there’s a problem with one of the girls, I have to go.”
They all stop what they are doing and give me their attention.
“It’s Sienna,” I confirm.
Christian and Finn give me an understanding chin lift.
“Yep, sure, let us know when everything is alright,” Axel calls out from behind a blonde.
Turning to Derrick, I grab him by the shoulders and say, “I’ll look after her, I promise.”
Derrick gives me the directions to the club the girls are at. I ask Sean, one of our security guys, to come along and he gives the directions to our driver.
Ten minutes later we are outside the club, Sean's ushering me inside and I see her immediately. She is dancing on a table, singing to the music, giggling to herself. She looks totally wasted swaying up there.
Vanessa and Isla look shocked at seeing me. “What the hell are you doing here?” Vanessa frowns at me, stepping in front of Sienna, who hasn’t noticed me yet.
“I’ve come to help.”
Rolling her eyes at me, she snaps, “Don’t you think you’ve done enough? I warned you, Evan, to stay away but you couldn’t, could you? You just couldn’t leave her alone.”
I know Vanessa is pissed off at me right now, and I guess rightly so. I’m not sure what Sienna has told her about what's happened between us, but judging by her frosty tone, it's probably everything.
Taking a step toward her, I say, “I care about her, Ness. I heard about Beau and I know she’s upset.”
Letting out a sigh, Vanessa moves away from the table.
I look up at Sienna, who seems lost in the music and her dancing. Fuck, she shouldn’t be drinking, not until I find out if I knocked her up or not.
“Sienna,” I call out her name, but she’s too busy dancing to hear me. Grabbing her by the legs, I pull her to my chest. She starts to squeal as her feet leave the table but her eyes focus on me; her green eyes soften as I hold her in m
y arms.
“Evan,” she whispers my name, looking shocked to see me here. Her hands touch my face trying to work out if I’m real or not. “You are so hot,” she mumbles as she continues to stare at me. I slowly put her feet on the ground but I don’t let go of her. “Fuck, I miss your wonder cock. I'm so fucking horny. My fingers don’t make me come like you do.”
Fuck, she didn’t just say that. My wonder cock stands to attention hearing his name. Bending down I whisper in her ear, “My hand is a horrible substitute to your pussy.” I know she will probably not remember any of what I say to her.
Sienna lets out a groan, wrapping her arms around my neck she pulls me hard against her, kissing me as if her life depends on it.
I push her away slowly. “Sienna, you’re drunk, sweetheart.”
Letting out a girlish giggle, she says, “I'm not drunk enough that I couldn’t fuck your brains out.”
My eyes catch Vanessa and Isla's who are trying not to laugh, great friends they were.
“Sweetheart, I like my women to be a bit more sober than you are at the moment.”
Resting her face on my chest, she replies, “As long as they’re groupies, they’re the only women you like to fuck, aren’t they?”
Tensing at her words, I frown at her.
A single tear falls from her cheek. “I'm never good enough for anyone. They always want more from someone else.”
My heart aches for her. “Sienna,” I whisper into her ear, trying to get her attention, but she won’t look at me.
“Just take me home, Evan. I'm not having fun anymore.”
Pulling her to my side, I let Vanessa and Isla know she is ready to go home. We make our way from the club to the waiting car. Sienna falls asleep as soon as her head hits my shoulder.
“She’s a mess, Evan,” Vanessa comments, holding onto Sienna’s hand.
“Seeing those photos of Beau tonight showed her what could have been. She’s really lost at the moment. Thank you for coming tonight,” she says, giving me a strained smile.
