by JA Low
“You wouldn’t want to do a long distance relationship?”
I look at him in surprise. “Relationship?”
He gives me a grin. “Yeah, for you I want to try.”
Oh my God! Axel Taylor wants to be in a relationship with me. Bugger, bugger, bugger. This cannot be happening.
“I don’t think we would work.” My answer hits him hard and he tenses for a moment. “You could have any woman in the world, why me?”
He grabs me and pulls me closer. “You make me feel good, Olivia. When you are around I can relax, be myself, not Axel Taylor from Dirty Texas. For some reason I feel like I can trust you. That is hard when you are a celebrity because everyone wants something from you. But you don’t, you aren’t caught up in the hype around who I am.”
Guilt is eating at me. I can never be yours Axel, never. I look away because I can’t look at him anymore. “You don’t have to say anything now, I just…” There’s that vulnerability again, it looks good on him. “Just think about it, okay?” I nod. “We still have some time here together before I have to get back to LA. I would like to spend it with you, would that be okay?”
My heart is beating furiously, I can’t lead this man on, I’m not that kind of girl, but I also don’t want to let him go. “Can I think about it?” Axel’s face falls at my answer. My hand traces the hard plains of his chest. “If I keep waking up with you in my bed, Axel, I don’t know if I could let you go.” My eyes meet his, a single tear falls down my cheek.
“Hey, hey, I didn’t mean to upset you.” He presses feather light kisses against my face. “I just wanted to be honest with you. I like you, I want you. If all you can give me of yourself is this until I leave, then I’ll take it. I would rather have you for a short time than not have you at all.”
This man is killing me. I nod because who the hell can say no to those declarations. “Until you leave, that is all I can give you.” I lean forward and press my lips against his in a soft kiss, I rest my forehead against his. “I wish our lives were different, but they’re not. I’m going to be selfish for the first time in my life. I want to spend the rest of your time here with you.” I pull myself away from him. “I don’t want the other guests to know about us, is that okay?”
“Of course. No one needs to know about us unless you want them to know.”
“Thank you.” I snuggle back into his chest, absorbing his heat around me. I take it all because I know it’s the only male affection I am ever going to receive for a very long time.
“Oh, Liv,” Ivy sighs.
“I know, I know. I am weak. The man was naked in my bed, what the hell was I meant to say?”
“I don’t blame you, but you need to be careful, especially if he is declaring feelings.”
My stomach sinks. “I know, it’s so wrong, but…I mean he’s leaving and I’ll never see him again. It can’t hurt, can it?”
“Maybe not, but…” Ivy shrugs.
“I know. I just have to make sure not to fall for him.”
Ivy gives me a look.
“Fine, any more than I already have.”
“Just be careful, you know if Penny or Eddie find out about this they are going to make your life a living hell.”
I shudder at the thought. God, if Penny knew Dirty Texas was up here she would be on the next plane from London.
140
Axel
The last couple of days I have been sneaking into Olivia’s room at night once everyone else has gone to bed. After spending the night loving every inch of her body, in the morning I take the secret passages back to my bedroom and meet everyone for breakfast. Olivia always joins us and gives me a knowing smile as I take a seat near her.
I know it was stupid of me declaring my feelings for her, but I thought for the first time in my life I wanted to take a chance on a woman. Her reaction wasn’t exactly what I was expecting, but I get her reservations about the two of us. I have no idea how a relationship between us would ever work. But I do know that eventually I don’t want a long distance relationship, I want to be able to wake up next to her, turn over and have my way with her at any moment I desire. The other thing is I don’t see myself leaving LA either. My family is there, my friends, my business, everything that I am is there and everything that is Olivia is here. I just need to enjoy our time together as limited as it is.
“Happy birthday, brother,” I cheer, slapping Evan on his back as I enter the games room.
“Thanks, man.” Evan starts racking up the billiard balls.
“I was just remembering your thirtieth the other day.” Evan grins. “And now look at you…married, wife, baby and another baby on the way.”
Evan laughs, “Yeah, if you had told me that two years ago I would have thought you were mad. But as cliché as it sounds, the love of a good woman changes everything.” I now understand those words a little better, not that I am in love with Olivia or anything, just that I’ve met a girl that has made me think of wanting different things for my life.
“You got lucky with Sienna, man,” I say as I take a shot and split the colored balls across the table.
“Yeah, I did.” He gives me a stupid grin. “You thinking that you might want to settle down?” I stop what I’m doing and straighten up from the table.
“I’m not sure.” And that’s the truth.
“I’m not meant to break the marriage code, but…I’ve heard you and Olivia have been hanging out.”
Has Olivia been talking to the girls? I thought she didn’t want anyone to know about us. “What have you heard?” I ask, not wanting to say too much.
Evan bends over and takes his shot, sinking a couple of balls. “You know, I heard about Monaco.” He raises his eyebrows at me.
“That was just fun.”
“So magical dates in the French countryside, were they just fun as well?” He questions me as he takes another shot, sinking a ball. He moves around the table to take another.
“They were fun…”
He chuckles, “I’m sure they were. I also heard that you took her to The Paradise Club.” He misses his next shot.
“Again, fun,” I state as I line up and take my shot, sinking another ball.
“Interesting, that’s all.”
“Don’t suppose you heard she gave me a fake number by any chance?”
He bursts out laughing, “She didn’t?” I nod. “No wonder you are chasing after her, I think that might be the first time anyone has said no to you.” He twirls his cue in his hands.
“Ha, ha,” I say, taking my shot but missing. “She’s a good girl.”
“Then why the hell is she interested in you?” Evan laughs.
“I forgot how much of an ass you are.”
He misses his next shot. He straightens up and has a serious look on his face. “This business is a lonely place, mate.” Sienna’s Australian words have started creeping into Evan’s vocabulary. “And I’m guessing seeing Christian settle down is making you think.” He flicks me on the forehead with his finger.
“Ouch, fucker.” I rub my forehead.
“I’m just making sure you’re listening. If you think Olivia might be the right girl for you, don’t be a dick like me and be scared of your feelings. I messed up with Sienna and I very nearly lost her for good. My life would honestly suck right now if I didn’t have her.” Wow, Evan’s going all relationship guru on me. I frown at him. “Look, I know we don’t always share what’s going on with our feelings and shit, but you’re my best mate, if you need to talk I am here. Sometimes I might even have some good advice.”
I chuckle as he slaps me on the back.
“I told her I liked her,” I confess.
“And?”
“And, she told me she couldn’t give me more after I left.”
“Hey, at least she’s honest.” I nod in agreement. “But you might want more?”
“She’s different to the girls we normally pick up, or the girls I have fun with at The Paradise Club. She’s honest, open
and she doesn’t care how much money I have, or what material things I may own.”
“She does own a fucking castle.” Evan points out.
“Yeah, exactly. But when we are alone together we can talk. She is super intelligent, especially when it comes to business. And the sex…” My words trail off as I don’t normally talk about my sex life with the guys.
“Sounds like you might have met your match,” Evan smiles at me, handing me a beer.
“Yeah, I think so. It sucks that it can’t go any further. My life is in LA and hers is here, in the middle of nowhere in a fucking castle.”
“We could always open a London office,” Evan jokes.
I stop to think, the wheels in my head start to turn.
“Oh shit!” Evan laughs, taking a sip of his beer.
“Well why shouldn't we expand? I know we are talking about opening a New York office, and I know you were wondering about an Australian one, seeing as you guys spend so much time down there. Why can’t we open one in London? There are so many talented artists here in the UK. And don’t forget Duo are from Sweden.” Duo is a DJ act on our label that has exploded onto the scene over the past six months, especially during the European summer circuit.
“You that serious about the girl?” Evan questions me which makes me stop to think, really think. Am I seriously thinking about expanding our business just so I can be closer to Olivia?
“Um, no…just might be a great business idea.”
Evan scoffs at me.
“It would be,” I argue.
“Okay, let’s go with that.”
I haven’t seen Olivia all day, but I know she is busy getting everything set up for tonight.
“Hey, sweetheart,” Mom hollers when I stick my head into the library. “Come sit down beside this fire and warm up.” I do as I am told and sink into the old leather chair. “This place is magical.” She closes the book she was reading and looks outside. The tiniest dusting of snow has landed on the gardens. “Could you imagine if these walls could talk, what they would say? They are hundreds of years old. Imagine all the things they have seen over the centuries.” Mom is a bit of a fan of historical romance stories.
“Yeah, it’s kind of amazing it’s still standing after all the wars and things that have happened around it.” Olivia filled me in on her family history one night as we snuggled by the fire place. It was kind of cool being able to trace her ancestors back hundreds of years.
“Olivia is lovely, isn’t she?” Mom looks up at me, I can see the mischief in her eyes.
“Mom,” I say sternly.
“Oh hush, you. I see the way you two exchange sneaky glances at each other, you are both not very subtle. I also notice that you disappear together when you think no one is watching.”
Shit, I thought we were being a little more covert than that.
“A mother knows her sons; I knew it the first time Christian brought Vanessa home. She was the right woman for him, but neither were ready for what they have now.”
“Mom, it’s not like that.”
“I know all about your groupies, I know that you have one night stands or friends with benefits and things. Do I wish that both of my boys can find love? Of course, I want them to be happy. But I also know that you are more guarded than your brother with your feelings. I worry that you have buried them so far down that there is no chance you could ever find them again.” Mom reaches out and takes my hand in hers. “I love you, Axel, I want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy. I know what happened when you were younger changed you and I wish I could have taken your place. I wish I could take away your pain, it kills me.” Tears slip down my mom’s cheeks.
“Mom, please, I’ve moved passed what happened to me.”
She nods and sniffles. “I know baby, you have. You are such a strong boy, and I know counseling helped you, but you don’t let people in, Ax. You keep most people at arm’s length, especially women, and I understand it, I do.” Those tears fall again. “I love you. You are still my baby even though you are thirty years old. You deserve happiness, just as much as your brother. I want that for you.” She squeezes my hand.
“I know, Mom, I know.”
She shakes her head trying to get the terrible thoughts of what happened to me all those years ago from her mind.
“Olivia is a beautiful woman. She is also smart, funny and polite. The way she looks at you, Axel… it’s like you are something she has been waiting for all her life and she doesn’t quite believe you are there.” My heart skips a beat and I shake my head in disagreement. “No, Axel, she does. I can see you are looking at her the same way, wondering where the hell this woman came from. She challenges you, she doesn’t care that you are a rock star, she isn’t after fame or fortune. She owns a castle and she’s royalty, she doesn’t need you for anything other than to be her partner.”
“Mom,” I say sternly.
She puts her hands in air. “Just calling it like I see it, sweetheart.” She gives me a smile.
“I’m not going to lie to you and say there is nothing happening between Olivia and I. Your eagle eyes have somehow noticed it, but we both agreed that we would have fun until I leave.”
Her smile sinks a little. “I understand, sweetheart. You do both live on the opposite sides of the world. But I wouldn’t be sad if you know…we had to come visit you here at a castle, just saying.”
I roll my eyes at my mom, she doesn’t give up.
141
Olivia
I stare out of the window from my office, looking over the snowy gardens. The end of the year is upon me and I am thinking about what a crazy one it has ended up being. I wonder what the New Year will bring. Actually, I know what it will bring. It will bring heart break as I say goodbye to a man that I like but can never have more of. A wedding to a man that I don’t love or will ever love, a life that I am dreading. There is nothing to look forward to. Gee, could it get more depressing?
“Hey,” I squeal as Axel wraps himself around me, my heart is racing from the surprise.
“Bloody hell, you scared me.” I try to get my heart rate down from heart attack level to normal.
“Sorry, I thought you heard me. You must have been deep in thought. Wanna talk about it?” He turns me in his arms so my back is against the cold window; it prickles my skin with goosebumps.
“No, not really.” I give him a small smile.
“Hey,” he says, taking my face in his palms. “Honestly, I’m not happy about leaving either.” My heart skips a beat as his lips touch mine. He is gentle at first, soft, sweet, telling me that he understands that there is some sort of crazy chemistry between each other. A small moan falls from my lips as he lightly nibbles my bottom lip; my hands finding his taut ass and gives it a squeeze. Now it is his turn to let out a groan. He deepens the kiss, his hands move from my face and over my body, my nipples are pressed achingly hard against my sweater and I can feel him hardening against me. How does this man make my body come alive with just the barest of touches?
“What’s going on here?”
I push Axel away from me, I know that voice.
“Penny,” I squeak out, she is standing in the doorway with a shocked expression on her face. Well I’m assuming it’s shock, she has had a lot of Botox. Her two best friends, Arabella and Isadora, her minions who happily follow her around like she is a queen, are standing by her side. “What the hell are you doing here?”
Her eyes look Axel over hungrily, stopping at the considerable bulge in his jeans. She slips over to where he is standing beside me. “Hi, I’m Penelope, Olivia’s younger sister,” she introduces herself as she gives her hand to Axel. He takes it but she grabs it and turns it over. “Oh, your hands are so large,” she purrs. “They look like they have been well worked.” She gives him a flirty smile, admiring his calloused fingers. “I bet you know what to do with them.”
Axel removes his hands from her. “And you will never find out,” he tells her. His blatant refusal stuns her for
a moment. Not everyone is fooled by her advances. Axel’s little comment makes me happy.
She narrows her eyes at him and then focuses on me. “Well, well, well, Livy, never knew you had it in you.”
“What are you doing here, Penny?”
“What, can’t a sister come and spend New Year’s with her family?” Penny puts on her cutesy mask.
“First time in what…” I tap my lip with my finger. “Ten years.”
She silently fumes at me, but our upbringing has trained her to not make a scene. “Something has changed about you, Liv.” Her eyes drift over to where Axel is standing. “Guess someone’s been working their magic on you. I’m sure people will be impressed with this new Olivia.” My heart is racing, please don’t mention Eddie, please don’t say anything. I don’t respond.
“I’ll catch up with you later, Axel.” I break the silence and he frowns. He doesn’t want to leave me with my sister. Another little bit of information I shared while in bed with him, Penny and all the havoc she likes to bring to my family.
“Are you sure?” He steps toward me.
I step back away from him which makes the frown on his face deepen. This little bubble we had created here has finally burst, our time together is now over, we knew it couldn't last forever.
“Yes.” I straighten myself up. I know the fight I am going to have with Penny as soon as Axel leaves. He nods and walks out of the room. Penny gives me a couple of moments before she starts laying into me.
“Well, well, well. I’m sure Mother and Father would love to hear about how their precious Olivia has been slumming it with a dirty rock star.”
“At least he isn’t a D-grade celebrity like the ones you slum with.”
Penny’s jaw drops to the floor; I never fight back. I’m always the good girl, I don’t want to stress my father out and Penny does enough of it for us.
“Wow, he obviously has a magic dick because whatever he has been doing to you has most certainly loosened up that giant stick up your ass. Oh wait, you did anal, didn’t you? That’s why the stick has gone.” She lets out a cackle and her bloody minions follow.
