by Grace Gervas
Shelistenedthesoundoftherainfallandsawthelights crackingtheskywithoutahorror;perhapseveryoneoutthere waslostinbeautifuldreamsbehindtheircloseddoors,she thought.Shefeltlikeshewastheonlyweirdonetobeawakeat thatmoment.Sighing,sheclosedthecurtainsandsatonher bedroomcouch,bothherlegsonthecushionamomentafter. HermindwentbacktothatafternoonwhenshesawRyan smilingbrightlyatthatwoman;asoftexasperatedsighescaped herlungs.
"CutitoutClaire,it'snotlikeyoulovehimorsomething."She triedsnappingoutofit. ShewastoocuriousaboutRyanStevens;shewasstrangely dyingtoknoweverythinghedid,wherehewentandwhomhe met.Hewasthefirstmantohavepiquedhercuriositytosuch extent,andshehadnoideawhy.Coulditbeduetohisrude manners?Orhispersonalitychanges;sometimeswarm sometimescold?Shecouldn'tquiteunderstandathing.
Shesuddenlystretchedherhandandunpluggedher cellphonefromitscharger;shestaredatitthoughtfullyfora while,andwithouthersanemindshesenthimatext;
FROM:Claire TO:RYANTHEJERK Fri***11:11PM (Subject)Yousleeping?
sent. Shewasn'treallyexpectinganyreply,soshedecidedtogo backtoherbed.Afterfewminutesherphonebeeped;she grabbeditfastandreadthethereply;
FROM:RYANTHEJERK TO:Claire Fri***11:16PM (Subject)Notyet,Areyou?
received. Shefeltexhilaratedatthesightofhisreply.Justasshestarted typingback,therewasanincomingcallfromhim.Shesmiled mischievouslyandquicklyslidthereceiver.
"Wereyouwaitingformycall?"Ryanasked,referringtoher fastprompt. Hisvoicewastoointimidating,Clairethought.Butasstrangely asitwas,sheonlystartedtoimaginehimonhisking-sizedbed talkingtoher,andnothingelseotherthanmarvellingwhathe waswearingcametomind.Shewasgoinginsaneandsheknew it.Shefoundherselfgrinningridiculously.
"WhywouldI?Ijusthappenedtohavemyphoneclose,that's why."sheargued. Ryanchuckled."Whyareyoustillawake?"
"Ican'tfallasleep,IthinkI'mdevelopinginsomnia."
"Really?I'malsoavictim,somaybeIshouldrecommendyou tomytherapist!"Heprovokedherwhilelaughingdelightfully. "ShallIsendyouheraddress?"
"Her?Nothankyou!"Shereplied,inaseriousmanner.. "Butwhy?Ipromisesheisthebest."
"OhIbetsheis,"shemocked."orelsewhywouldyoumeet herifyou'restillawakebynow?"Hervoicewasrathersharp, andhecontinuedlaughingatit.
"Whydidyouleaveinsuchahurryearlier?"Ignoringher sarcasm,Ryanchangedthesubject. "Didyouwanttoenjoyseeingthegirlyoujustkissedtheother nightmakingafriendlychatwiththesocalledyourgirlfriend?" Shesnapped."Well,Icouldn'tgiveyouthepleasure.I'msorry!"
"OhsoyouleftbecauseofDoris?"Heasked,inwhatsounded likeamockery. "NoIleftbecauseofme!"Shesnapped."Ihavemyprideyou know,eventhoughyouthinklowlyofme."shenearlybarked, andstartedtoregrettextinghimaltogether.
Ryanremainedquiet,tolethersayitall;hefeltamusedby herwords,itseemed."AndwhataboutyouandBruno?Thegirl whojustkissedmetheothernighthangingaroundwithmy brotherashisdate,"heinsinuated,jealously."whatdoImake outofthat?"
ItwasClaire'sturntolaugh."Areyoujealousbyany chance?"Sheevengottheenergytogetupandmovedbackto thecouch.
"What?Thatshitdoesn'texistinmydictionaryyounglady." "Wellfine!Ifyousayso."shecontinuedmakingfunofhim. Theytalkedforalmostanhourandshedecideditwasn'tsobad ofadecisiontotexthimafterall.
SOMEdayspassed,andlifewenton.Clairewaspreparingthe presentationmaterialsatwork.Shewasaskedtoaccompany oneofherseniorstomeetanimportantclientintwoweeks.She wasexcitedtofinallygooutanddosomerealwork,even thoughitwasabitodd.Shekeptherselfbusyforthatentire week,thatcouldn'tevenmeetGenawhenshe'dreturnedfrom hertrip.OnSaturdayafternoon,however,theyplannedadate atGena's.
Genawasn'thappy,forherfosterparentswantedherback homeastheywereonavacation.Shelovedfreedomandthe city;goingtotheircountryhouseservedagreatdealoftorture. Plus,shehadbeenlivingalonesinceshewasinhighschool,due toherparent'stravellingsformedicalmissions.
"Sowhatareyougoingtodo?"Claireasked,worriedly. "I'lljusthavetoseriouslyfindajob!"shegrinned.They lookedateachotherandsmiled.
"Greatidea."Clairesaid."Ifyouwant,IcanaskJorgeif there'sanopening!"Shesaidsuggestively.
"Ohbestfriend,you'reasaint.I'llbemorethangratefulif youdothat."
"AnythingforyouGena."Shereturned,andmeantevery word. Therestofthedaywasfilledwithnothingbutanexchangeof somecheesygossip;mainlyaboutRyanStevensandhisability toturnherwacko.Theyhadtoleavearoundsunset,whenGena gotaninvitefromsomeguyonlysheknew.That'swhenClaire decidedtotakeawalk,withtheeveningairblowingpasther hairinasoothingmanner.Shedidn'tknowwheretogoorwhat todoatthetime;theideaofgoingbackhomesoughttheworst ofthemall.Itwasoneofthemomentsshehated,whenshe'd losehersenseofdirection.
Maybesheshouldjustdrinkanddie,Shewondered, standingatthefrontofawhiskeybarwithalonelyexpression. "Noyoucan'tClaire,youarenotsuchaloseryet,butperhaps verysoon!"shesaidtoherself.ShewishedBrunowasliving there,andmomentarilyentertainedtheideaofcallingRyan.
Shekeptonwonderingwhilemovingslowlyandstopped movingattimes.Ifsomeonesawher,mayhavethoughtshewas crazy.Afterawhileshestoppedatthebusstop;shejustwanted totakeabusandridewhateverroutethatwaslonger,inhope tokilltime.Whilewaitingthere,shethoughtofhowpatheticher lifewas;shedidn'tknowhowtohavefun,howtouseher weekendsandsparetimes.
"AndhereI'mthinkingofsomeoneelse'sboyfriendinstead oftakingcareofmylife."shemurmuredwhilestaringather phonewithRyan'scontactnamedisplayed.Shefelttheurgeto callhim,talktohim,provokehimeventhoughsheknewthathe wasn'tthemanforher.Withoutthinkingfurther,shetouched thedialpadandafterfewbeeps,Ryananswered.
"Hello?"Hereturned.Clairestayedsilent;partofhermind thinkingaboutwhatshereallywantedfromhim."Hello?Claire, areyouthere?"
"Yes...Iam."Shemurmuredhuskily."ImissyouRyan,I shamelesslymissyou."Shebrokeout,hereyessparkling,on vergeoftears.Shequicklygotagripandsniffed.Sheknewshe hadhitarockbottomandmadeacompletefoolofherself. Whatwasshedoing?Andwhyhim?Sheaskedherselfandno answercametomind.
Ryanwassilentforawhile,butwhenhefinallytalkedhe onlyasked,"Whereareyou?" "Atthebusstop?"Shemuttered.
"Whereexactly?"Heurged.
"Um--oppositetoGoldenpearlhotel?"sheanswered.She hadnoideawhyhe'daskedthough.
"I'mcoming,don'tmoveamuscle!"SaidRyan,andhisline wentdead. "OhGod,what'sthematterwithyouClaire?"Shesnapped herself,stupidly."Haveyougonecrazy?"Shescratchedherhair likeamaniac.
She'dcalledhim,andhe'dagreedtobethere.Itwascrazy butreal,andshewasnolongerinherrightmind,shethought. CHAPTER7 Ryanreachedthereaftertwenty-fiveminutesandfoundClaire sittingtherelikealostpuppy.Heparkedthecarinfrontofthe busstopandwalkedtowardswhereshewassitting.
"Haveyoudecidedtomakemeworryaboutyoulikealittle girl?Whydidyousoundlikeyouwereabouttodie?"Ryan's voicewasamixtureofangerandconcern.
"You...youreallycame?"Clairesaidwithdisbelief.She stooduptoclearlylookathim;helookeddifferent,in abominableway,dressedupcasually.Thekindofsightthatno womanwould'veresistedtolooktwice.
"Let'sgo,Iwonderwhereyoucamefromdresseduplike that."Hesaidwhilelookingathermischievously.Herdressing wasabitprovokingtohiseyes.
"Thereisnothingwrongwithmyoutfitthough."sheargued astheyenteredhiscar. AllthatRyandidwastakingherforalongdrivetoaplace thatshedidn'tknowexisted.Ryansaidshewould'veenjoyedit betterduringadaylightbutnonetheless,itdidClaireagreat dealofpleasure.Sheevendozedoffontheirwayback.
"Heysleepyhead,weareback!"Ryantriedtowakeherup. "Mm...already?"Clairesnuggledinasleepyvoice. "Shallwegobackthen?"Heaskedinaseriousway. "Um--whyarewehere?"Shesnappedinsurprise,after seeingtheplacetheywereat.
Ryansmirked."Stophavingthosewildfantasies,let'shave dinner;there'sanicerestaurantinthishotel!"Hesnappedand gotoffthecar.
"I'mnotfantasizinganything!"Clairesmiledpatheticallyand followedhim.
Theyhadanothernicedinnerandtheconversationtooka differentturnfromworktoprivatelife.
"Wherewereyou?"askedRyanwhileeating. "Toafriend'shouse."Claireanswered.Seeinghisfrowning, shecleared,"HernameisGena,incaseyouarecurious!"She smiled.
"I'mnotcurious!"Hesaid.
"You'renot?"Sheraisedaneyebrow."Butyourfacesays otherwise."
Heshookhisheadtothesides,amusedbyallherinsistence. Heslowlysippedthewine,withoutabandoningherfineeyes. "I'mreallynotcurious,trustme!"Henarrowedhisgaze,as thoughmockingherinaway.
"Fine!"Sheresigned. Helaughed."Youlovearguingalot,don'tyou?"hesipped hiswineagain,whilestaringatherherchewingmouth
.Luckily Clairewasawomanofclass;shehadgreatetiquette;shewas farfrombeinganembarrassment.
"Ido.WhenIhaveapointtoprove!"Shesaid.
"Doyouhaveaboyfriend?"Heblurtedout. Shealmostchockedherfood,andquicklyrunforanapkin. "No,Idon't." Hewasincreasinglyamused.Hecould'vestayedallnight long,listeningtohowcompetitiveshesounded.Atthatmoment, hejustwantedtoknowmoreabouther,withoutanygrand interestofakindthatanygirlwouldstartimagining.
"Why?You'reyoung,beautifulandsmartIguess,it'sonly naturaltohavesomeone."
"MaybeIhavehighstandards!"Shereturned.
Helaughedhard."Really?That'salottotakein!"He remarked,andsheonlyshrugged. "Whataboutyou?"Shechangedthegame."Doesyour girlfriendknowyou'rehererightnow?"Andcounterattacked whenRyanleastexpected;andhewasstrangelyverystoic.
"Shedoesn'tneedto,"hequipped."becausewehavea mutualunderstanding."Headded,gallantly.
Clairebitherlipsirritatedly."Oh!Likesomekindofanopen relationship?"Shehardlyasked. Henodded."Sure,wecangowiththat!"repliedhe, haughtily.Annoyedwiththesubject,Clairedownedherglassin onego."Easythere!"Hegasped."ThisChardonnayisalittle strong!"
"DoIlooklikeIcare?"Shesnorted.Itwastheendof conversation,forwhichhekeptsmilingathersulkingface. "Issomethingwrong?Whyareyouquiet."Heboldlyasked. Sheglaredsternlyathim."No,everythingisfine."She grinned,andraisedaglass."Whatamoron!"Shemumbled,ina lowvoice.
"Whatdidyousay?"
"Nothing,thewhetherisverynice."
"Theweather?"Helaughed.
"Yeah,theweather!"Shesnapped,andRyanhadhugesip soastostiflehislaugh. Hedroveherbackhomeinanawfulsilent,thatClaire herselfinstigated.Hekeptstaringatherfromtimetotimewith asmilethatwasn'treturned.Heunderstoodwhy.
"Don'tthinktwicetocallmewhenyoumissme!"Hesaid seriouslyoncetheyarrivedinfrontofClaire'shouse. "Okay,I'llkeepthatinmind."Sheretorted.
"Anddon'tstickyourselfatthebusstopasifyou'velost yourpurposetolive."
Shescowledathim."Idon'tdothateveryday,okay?"She lashed."Don'tmistakemeforaloner."
Hejustlaughed."Also,onemorething,"hetookapause, andsheeyedhimcuriously."don'tyouhaveacar?" "Idon'tneedone!I'mfine!"Repliedshe,coldly. "Really?NoI'mnotcomfortablewiththat!"SaidRyan thoughtfully. Ignoringhisobnoxiousinnuendo,Clairelaughedandgotoff thecar."ThankyoufortodayRyan."Sheutteredtruthfully. "Again,itwasgreat,anddrivesafely."shesaidandleftwithabit insatiablelook;shewantedmoreaftersuchanicedate,but again,themanwasn'tforher.
Ryanstartedthecarandslidaway;butonhiswayoutofthe neighbourhood,hefoundoutthatshe'dforgottenhercellphone. HemadeaquickU-turn.AtClaire's,herangthegatebelland thehousemaidopenedaftersomeminutes;sheseemed worriedofsomething.
"Excuseme,canIseeClaire?Tellherit'sRyan."Hekindly askedher. "Ah--aboutthat,"themaidstuttered,whilehoveringasif somethinghorriblewashappening.Alittleworried,Ryanshoved herasideandentered."Siryoucan't--"shetriedtostophimbut hewastoodetermined.Heonlydidsouponhearingtheshouts betweenClaireandherstepmother.
"Iheardthatyoureceivedahugesumofmoneybutwhy didn'tIknowanythingaboutit,tellmeyouungratefulbrat?"The motherbarked."Iknewyouweresoconnivingsincethefirst timeIcamehere!handoverthelanddeedifwanttokeepon livinghere!Besides,whatwillyoudowithit?Whycan'tyoulet Jorgeuseitforcompanyinterests"
Clairewasstillstandingthere,fumingwithanger."Why wouldIgivehim?Sayswho?WhatcanIdowithit?Hah!Wait andseewhatIcandowithit!"
"What?" "Isaidjuststayputandseeforyourself!"Shetoldher. "What'swrongwithyoureally?You'vegotthecompany,you havethehouse,you'veconfiscatedallofmyfather'sbank accounts,aretheynotenough?Iknowyoumarriedhimmoney andIknowyouneverlikedmeevenabitbutIendured everything!"Clairescreamedangrilywithtearsinhereyes.Her motherwantedtoslapherbutshequicklygrabbedherwrist.
"Howdareyou--"Thestepmotherstarted. "Why?Doesithurttohearthetruth?Thatyouareadamn golddigger?Sonowyouwannahitmeagain?"Sheinsisted."I'm nolongerthatlittlenaivegirlwhoacceptedeverythingjustto pleaseyouandseekyourattention!Youwanttheland?You'll havetokillmefirst!"
"Howdareyou--"thewomantriedtofreeherwrist,but Clairekeptitgripped. "I'llneverletyouhitmeagain!"Shewarned."Anddon't thinkI'maweaklingjustbecauseIallowedyouafewtimes." Shefinallyreleasedherhand,andmarchedaway.
Ryanandthatmaidwerestilloutsidethedoor;helistenedand couldn'tstanditanymore.Hehandedthephonetotheher."It's Claire's!"hesaiddrylybeforewalkingaway. Heenteredhiscar,aminutelater,andleanedheavily againsttheleatherofthedriverseat.Hecontemplatedthat conversationandfoundhimselfworriedaboutClaire,andthat's whenheheardherslammingthegateandrunout.
Shethenstoppedasiftakingabreakafterarace;shewiped thetearswithherhand,andstartedwalkingslowlyawayfrom thehouse.Ryandroppedoutquickly,andfollowedher discreetlyfromadistance.
AsusualClairestoppedbythepark."Youcangobacknow,I don'tneedyourpity!"shesaidpointedly.
Ryanwassurprised."SincewhenhaveyouknownIwas behindyou?"heaskedcalmly. Shesneered."Fromtheverybeginning!"Sheanswered."I sawyourcarearlier,andsinceyouarehere,"shesighedheavily. "pleaseforgetwhateveryouheard.Don'tthinkthatyouknow menow!"sheaddedcurtly,takingaseatatherusualspot;Ryan didthesame.
"Ihavenoideaofwhatyouaresaying."Hefeignedoblivion. "Soisthistheparkthatyoutalkedabout?"hechangedthe subject;hewassogoodatit.
Clairenoddedandsmiledfaintly.Hefacedher,andmoved closertowipehertearswithhisthumb;thegesturesenther chills.Shewasjustlookingathim,wonderingwhohereallywas, andwhatheclearlywantedfromher.Withoutbotheringher brainfurther,sherunahandonhisleftsideburn.Hertouchwas sensual,andherheartwasracing;sheslowlyleanedforward, andgraduallyclosedhereyesasherlipslandedontopofRyan's. Shekissedhimandheaccepteditinsuchamanner.Heheldher tightly,tofeelherbodyagainsthis.
"Iloveyoursmell."Clairemutteredoutofthebluewhen themagicwasover."Imean,theperfume,orwhateveryou're using;don'tgetthewrongideas!"Shegotflustered,andhe laughed.
"Really?Thendon'tIdeservealittlemorecomplimentfor that?MaybeIcouldbringyouthebottleofmyCologneoneof thesedays!"Hejokedandshesmiled.
"You'resocorny!"Shesaid,andfoundtheireyespulling eachother,inacalmway."Ithinkwebetter--"shewantedtoget up,buthesuddenlypulledhertohisside;shewantedtoresist, butdecidedtorelent.
Hiswarmembracemadeherfeelsafe."Ialsohaveadark sidethatI'drathernoonefindsout;Ithinkeveryoneelsehas." Hesaid,andshescowled."Soyouhavenoreasontofeel alarmed!"Headded.
Clairepulledherselfbackfromhisarmsandlookedupat him,shocked."You?Mr.Perfect?Idon'tbelieveyou."she remarked."Youknowwhat?Whenifirstsawyou,Ithoughtyou werearudejerk!"
Ryanliftedhiseyebrow."Ohisthatso?AndIthoughtyou wereaninsolentlittlecreaturewithallthefoulremarksyou keptreturningme." "OhnoSir!Iwasmerelydefendingmyself." "Fromwho?me?" "Ofcourse!Youweredeliberatelytryingtointimidateme." "DidI?" "Yesyoudid!"
Helaugheddelightedly."Soyouwereintimidated?What aboutnow,haveyouchangedyourmind?" "Alittle!"Sheconfessed."Afterspendingsometimewith you,Irealizedthatperhapsheisn'tasbadashepretendstobe, ormaybeheishidinghistrueselfandwearsamaskofa ruthlessbusinessman."saidClaire."ButallI'msureofisthat youarethemanwhosavedmylife,sothankyouRyan!I couldn'tthankyouproperlytheotherday"Clairetoldhim calmly.Theybothstayedsilent.
WhenRyanarrivedhome,sometimelater,hetookhistime contemplatingthemomentspentwithClaire.Forsomereasns, thatonlyhimselfknew,hehuffedasmalllaughasthough imaginingsomethingfunny.Whileplacinghisphoneandcar keysdown,hedecidedtomessageher;
FROM:Ryan
TO:Ladyinrain Thu***10:45pm
(Subject)Isafelyarrivedhome.Thinkonlyaboutme,no oneelse.Goodnight!
sent.
HewaitedforaboutaminuteandreceivedClaire'sreply whichseemedpleasanttohiseyes;hesmiled. FROM:Ladyinrain TO:Ryan Thu***10:46pm
(Subject)I'llonlydosoifyoupromisetodothesame. Actually,Idemandyou!Anddon'tthinkofcallingmebecause mybatteryisdying.SleepwellMr.Perfect!Todaywasfun!
received. Uponreading,Ryan'ssmilewidenedwithpleasure;hewas abouttorespondwhenacallstoppedhim;ItwasfromDoris.He frownedabitbeforeswipingtoconnect.
CHAPTER8
The50thyearanniversaryofStevensKerenskygroupof companieswasnearlyapproaching;onlyafewdayshadleft. Ryanwasseatedinhistoweroffice,SKheadquarters,andDoris wasgoingthroughsomelistinsuchafrenzy.Hisofficedoor swungopenandHarry,Ryan'sbestfriendandheadofLegal departmentwalkedin.
"It'sdone!I'veredraftedthecontractandIthinkwewon't h
aveanyproblemswiththeadditionalclauses!"SaidHarry, ignoringthefrownonDoris'sface.
Shegrowled."Guys,canwegobacktothatdamned contractafterthiseventisover!I'mgoingnutshereandnoone seemstonotice!"HarryandRyanexchangedglancesbut remainedsilent."So,Imadetheinvitessenttoeveryoneonthe list,andI'msureeveryimportantpersonhasobliged,butwhy amIstillfreakingout?"Shecontinuedwhining.
Abandoninghiscomputer,Ryanlookedather."Iclearlytold youtoletsomeonehelpyou,butyou'rejustsostubborn!"He saiddryly.
"Ryan,I'maPRdirectorofthiscompany;ifanythinggoes wronginthisparty,it'llbetheendofmycareer!"Sheblurted."I won'tletthathappen!"Shestronglysnapped.
"Youmeantheendofyourpride?"Harrycontrived."Come onDoris,youcan'tdoeverythingonyourown!Letotherpeople helpyou,eventhepartyplanneriscomplaining;you're breathingundereveryone'sneck!"
ShegrowledandshotRyanaglare.Heonlyshrugged. "Maybeyoushouldgoandrestabit!I'malreadytiredofyour complainingtoo."Heutteredblatantlyandbothgentlemen laughed.
"Urgh!Ican'texpectanythingfromanyofyou!"She smackedthetable."FineI'lldoitallbymyselfandyougonna eatyourwords,becauseI'llmakethisanniversarytobe remembered!"Shegotupandcollectedherthings,includinga brandydesignerpursethatmatchedherlongheels."Oh,and Brunoaskedmefortwoinvitations,Iwassurprisedbecausehe nevertakespleasureonanythingthatinvolvesthecompany! Anyideawhat'supwithhim?Herefusedtotellmeathing!"
"No!"Theyansweredinunison. "Okay!Maybehehasagirlfriend?"Dorisinsinuatedwhileat thedoor."Welllater,gentlemen!"Shesnappedwithan ingredientofirony.
Ryanwassilentforaminute,figuringsomethingoutthat onlyheknew.
**** LATERTHATafternoon,ClairegotacallfromBrunoandagreed tomeethimoutsideherworkplaceduringlunchbreak.He arrivedshortlyaftershehadjustorderedherselfatallglassof freshjuiceatanearbyrestaurant.
"Heybeautiful,what'sup?"Hepeckedheronthecheek
beforepullingaseatacrosshers.
"Good!Whatareyoudoinginthecity,andwhat'swiththe rush?"Claireurgedhim. "Nobiggie,IjustneedtogetbackinMontesbybeforedark. Heythere'sananniversarypartythisFridayandIwashopingif youcouldcomewithme!"saidBrunokindly,pullingClaire's glassofjuice."Doyoumind?I'mreallythirsty!"Heasked casuallylikeafriendwould.
