by L. J. Evans
I looked at her, thoughtful, my heart hammering, my teenage body responding to her in a way I wasn’t sure I could control. “Probably. But ridiculous or not, it’s how I feel.”
Then she kissed me, and I kissed her back before leading her to the telescope that she spent hours looking through. The only time Khiley was ever really still was when she was searching the stars.
We had plans to search those stars together, and now we’d just have a baby to take with us. We’d be a unit of three instead of two. The rest of the family was going to have to figure out a way around the old traditions. This was the last Christmas Eve and Christmas morning I’d spend without her.
♫ ♫ ♫
As Christmas morning slowly moved into Christmas afternoon, my nervousness started to get the better of me. Not because of the engagement ring I had in the pocket of my jacket, but because of what Khiley and I were going to tell everyone after I gave her the ring.
Edie kept smiling at me encouragingly. Thankfully, Dad just thought my nerves were because I was proposing to Khiley. Mom didn’t know anything because I didn’t trust her to not tell Cam. And Cam…well, who knew what Cam would have done with the news. She was a loose cannon.
When we finally made it out to the Abbott ranch that afternoon, the road and the driveway were lined with cars. Christmas dinner had been at Cam and Blake’s house for as long as I could remember with all the grandparents, grandkids, and cousins showing up. A mix of Abbotts, Waters, Swaynes, and Brennans that weren’t really tied together by blood at all, but instead, we were tied together by something stronger: love.
For years, all of us kids had hidden ourselves in the game room until dinner, followed by presents. But now, we all mingled together like the supposed adults we were, a shift that was going to be a precipice for another change once I said I do to Khiley.
The first place my eyes went when we entered was to her, which wasn’t anything new. It had been that way my whole life. She looked beautiful in a teal dress that lit up her eyes. I kissed her and whispered, “How are you feeling?”
She said, “Okay. Mama keeps looking at me funny when I keep refusing the things I normally love. But it was either refuse or puke it up.”
“Are you ready to tell them?” I asked.
She nodded. “I think so. I’ve never been good with secrets.”
I agreed. It wasn’t really in either of our makeups.
“Present time,” Blake said, rubbing his hands together with a smile on his face that was partly hidden behind a scruff full of gray. Blake was the oldest of any of our parents, but the twinkle in his blue eyes was the most like Santa Claus of any of the adults. He loved handing out presents just as much as he loved teasing us as he did it.
We gathered around the living room the best we could, squishing in multiples onto the furniture. Normally, Khiley and I would sit on the floor together below the window seat Ginny and Eliza usually monopolized. Eliza was missing this year, spending Christmas with her boyfriend’s family, so today, I left Khiley on the window seat with Ginny. A puzzled, worried smile took over her face as I joined Blake in front of the tree.
“Is it okay if I start?” I asked. My voice wasn’t shaking. Not yet. This was the easy part. Blake smiled and nodded at me, his face splitting into a grin which was hard to imagine he could fit onto his face. Cam’s eyes narrowed at the two of us as if she knew something was coming she hadn’t been privy to, and I was glad I wouldn’t be Blake when they were alone tonight and she gave him hell for not telling her.
Cam was still dark-haired and lean. Like she’d been for as long as I could remember. When I looked at her, if I changed the hair color in my mind, I knew what Khiley would look like at fifty. Beautiful. Graceful. Strong. My heart surged.
As normal, the room was full of chatter and multiple conversations. “Yo, everyone, shut up,” Ty said, his booming voice making everyone look his way with a frown. “Stephen needs the floor.”
That turned everyone’s now quiet faces to mine.
Khiley was looking at me with a frown still. Like she didn’t understand how her Daddy and Ty might have known what we were supposed to be telling everyone about the baby. I grinned because I had our little unknown baby to thank for putting her off the scent. I’d thought I’d get to this point, and she’d already know what I was going to do before I did it.
“I’m not Uncle Derek. I’m not brilliant with words, but I’m going to do my best at the moment. So, maybe you can all bear with me. Khiley Marie Abbott, I’ve loved you since the first time you stole my pacifier at two years old. Maybe before that. I’ve loved you as we grew up side by side, fishing and studying and watching the stars. I’ve loved you while you showed me how to be a man instead of a boy. I’ve loved you, and I’ll go on loving you as long as you’ll let me. I’ll continue to try every day to become a better man than I was the day before so you’ll always have the best of me.”
I moved over to her, and I thought she was catching on, because a smile quirked at the corner of her lips. I held out my hand and lifted her from the window seat. I pulled out the little box with the huge bow dwarfing it.
“Will you do me the honor of making our love, not permanent, because it already is that, but official, by becoming my wife as well as my best friend and soul mate.”
“Stephen…” she breathed out. She took a look around the room at all our family and both our dads who were grinning, and her mom who was smiling, and my mom who looked like she was going to cry. “I didn’t know you needed to ask.”
“Some wise young woman told me once that sometimes a girl needed to hear the words.”
She flushed. “I love you.”
“So, that’s a yes, right?”
“Of course!” And everyone burst into claps and hollers while I kissed her, and Ty shouted, “Get a room,” and the parents all growled.
I opened the box because I thought maybe Khiley had forgotten about it, and I took out the ring Edie had helped me pick out. The band was a twisted braid of silver, gold, and platinum with a diamond surrounded by stones the color of the sea.
“It’s beautiful,” she said. I placed it on her finger before raising her hand to my mouth and kissing it gently.
“Can we please get to the rest of the presents now?” Khiley’s cousin, Dalton, said, which caused everyone to laugh, lightening the mood like Dalton was so good at doing.
“Well. There’s just one more thing,” I said, looking into Khiley’s eyes and making sure she was ready. She gave me a nod.
“Khiley and I had one more gift come our way this year.” I kept my eyes on her and not the other people in the room. She moved her hand to her stomach, and my own followed, hugging her, pulling her to me. “It seems we’re going to be parents.”
Silence. I risked looking up. My parents were frowning, Blake’s grin had slid off, and Cam looked like she was going to throw something at me.
“Try that again?” Dad asked.
“You’re going to be a granddad twice in a year,” I told him, and this time I couldn’t keep the smile away from my face.
“Holy shit,” Ginny said.
“Goddamn,” Mayson uttered.
“Don’t cuss,” Marina responded.
“Kitchen. Now,” Cam said, standing and leaving the room, expecting we would follow. And we did, but Khiley was still smiling, which was all that mattered to me.
Blake and my parents joined us. Both of our parents stared at us, but it was Cam who spoke first. “What were you thinking?!”
“Mama. It just happened,” Khiley responded.
“No, it doesn’t just happen. You have to…God…” Cam put a hand to her eyes. Not surprisingly, it was Blake who calmed her down. He pulled her to him, chin on her head.
“Cam, it happened to us,” he said with a wry smile.
“Wait, what?” Khiley asked.
“Mayson wasn’t exactly planned. You had to have known that,” Blake answered.
“But we weren’t still in college,” Cam protested.
“You were barely finished.”
Cam brushed a hand over her face.
My dad came over and wrapped an arm around my neck. “Did you not listen to a damn word I said?” he asked.
“I did. We did. It just…happened.”
“I’m going to be a grandma. Twice,” Mom said. She kissed Khiley on the cheek and hugged her. Then, she hugged me. “This is what you’ve both been so stressed about? Telling us about a baby? Babies are beautiful things. They bring joy.”
“How the hell am I old enough to be a grandma?” Cam said, panic in her eyes. “This is not right.”
Wynn laughed. “Cam, hug your daughter before she gets the idea you aren’t happy for her.”
Cam came over and pulled Khiley from me. “You, I have words for later,” she said to me, then to Khiley, “Is this what you want?”
“It’s a piece of Stephen and me. It’s us. It’s our future.”
She hugged Khiley to her. “I love you.”
“I love you, too, Mama.”
“Presents!” Mayson yelled, coming around the corner. He punched me in the shoulder. “You’re an ass who’s going to have to be beaten into a pulp later.”
Khiley punched him back. “No one is beating anyone unless it’s me beating you at pool.”
“Smart-ass, he got you knocked up. I’m your brother. I need to defend your honor.”
Cam flicked his nose. “Not going to happen, Mayson. We need him around to put that ring on her finger, marry her, and make her legal.”
My mama laughed. “Wait. How long was it before you and Blake got married? Mayson and Khiley were both born before you let him make it official.”
Cam stuck her tongue out at Mom, and I was grateful because it meant everything was going to be all right. Khiley and I had both worried ourselves to death over nothing. Like always, our family circled around us to hold us up instead of letting us fall. We both should have had more faith in them.
Family was their world, and it would be ours, too.
Cover Images: © iStock | Bedya | Antonel
Ty Waters and Maleena Crandall
You may remember Mia and Derek’s story in My Life as a Pop Album about a bookworm of a girl who carried around guilt over her brother’s death and a rock star who couldn’t walk away from her once he’d met her. You might remember that they were the first of the entire Album series couples to get married, but they were the last to have a child. When they did, they had twins, a boy and a girl, who became their whole world and were followed by a sister a couple of years later. The family they built was just part of a much bigger family that surrounded Derek’s band, Watery Reflection. Here’s the first of the stories about their children. This one is about their son, Tiras—or Ty, as he prefers—and how he got everything he desired…
Still confused? Check out the “My Life as an Album Series Who’s Who.”
Ty
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS
“I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know.”
Performed by Mariah Carey
Written by Carey / Afanasieff
While everyone was in an uproar over Khiley and Stephen’s pregnancy, I escaped to the quiet of Uncle Blake’s office to call Maleena. To see if, this time, she’d actually pick up. She didn’t, so I left a Merry Christmas message I was sure sounded too curt and wouldn’t win me any points in her playbook.
When she’d called off our secret relationship before the break, she’d had a whole series of choice words to say about me. Curt being the least of them. She’d said I was arrogant―which was pretty much true. She’d said I had a chip on my shoulder―which was definitely true. And she’d said if I didn’t change, it would impact my acceptance to the pros―which was also true—but pissed me off enough to walk out on her even though I really wanted to beg her to take me back.
The entire drive home from Knoxville, I’d stewed on her words. By the time I’d reached our house, I knew I wasn’t ready to let her go without a fight. Since then, I’d been hounding her with calls and texts. The few times she did pick up, she’d bounced between being irritated and sad, as if she kept hoping I’d be a different person each time I called. As if she was still hoping I’d become a better man. Like Stephen said he wanted to be for Khiley.
His words were haunting me. I wanted to be a better man, but I was failing. And in the last couple of days, Maleena had stopped picking up at all. Every unanswered call pushed me closer to dickhood. Closer to an edge I wasn’t sure I’d survive if I fell off. It hurt more than any fucking hit I’d ever taken on the football field. Not even the one that had broken my fingers my freshman year at UTK and worried everyone, including me, about whether I’d still be able to play.
Of all the things Maleena had said, one was true. I didn’t have my head on straight, and I needed to fix it fast. If I truly intended to skip my senior year and join the draft, I had to be more focused on the game than Maleena. That hurt. Stabbed at me. But it was the truth. If I wanted my dream, I had to put her out of my mind and concentrate on getting it.
I wandered around the study, trying to calm down before I rejoined the family. I was absentmindedly pulling books from the shelves when I pulled off an old spiral notebook instead. I wondered if it was a playbook from when Blake had been on the football team at Ole Miss. Before he’d given it up for the law. Giving up football felt like a sin to me.
I opened up the notebook, hoping it would help get Maleena out of my mind. I looked down and saw the word Jake and almost closed it. My chest seized up at just that one fucking word. I didn’t hate Uncle Jake—or rather—the man who would have been Uncle Jake if he hadn’t died an early death. I hated, with a passion, the never-ending comparison.
My whole life, I’d heard nothing but how I was him reincarnated or some damn thing. I looked like him. I played football like him. I was a damn good quarterback like him. My twin, Ginny, always snipped at me if I griped about it. She said our entire town had a Jake-sized hole left in it that had never healed, and I had the opportunity to mend it. But goddamn, I didn’t want to be the one responsible for healing anyone. Especially not a town. I’d never been that good of a boy, and I still wasn’t that good of a man.
Maleena understood me better than anyone. I thought she’d accepted me for the arrogant asshole I was, but she hadn’t. She’d still expected something from me, just like this family and this town had somehow expected me to be him. To be Jake.
I shoved my silent phone into my pocket and sat down in Uncle Blake’s desk chair. I flipped to the front, realizing almost immediately it was Aunt Cam’s journal of some sort. It was a huge invasion of her privacy to even have opened it, but the words on the front page dragged me in.
It happened when we were out and about, looking at apartments that we couldn’t afford. It was a failed attempt to reclaim some of our Polaroid moments of color and passion that had disappeared months ago with your kidneys. The sun streamed through a set of picture windows and highlighted you in a halo of light that captured my breath. In that moment, caught in the shimmery white, you almost looked like the football god you once were and not the weaker version of yourself you’d become.
I should have stopped. I should have stopped right there and put the notebook back on the shelf, but I couldn’t, because she was talking about Jake. She was talking about the moment when he’d become the man he didn’t want to be instead of the man he’d always been, and I needed to know what that was like. To be something different than what the world imagined you to be.
So, I kept reading.
Edie’s voice at the door startled me. “Everybody’s finally ready to do presents.”
I tried not to show my guilt when I looked up. I slowly shut the notebook, sliding it under my arm.
“What are you reading?” Edie asked, stepping closer. Older than all of us, Edie was often the one le
ft in charge, and consequently, she could read us almost as well as our parents.
“A playbook.” I shrugged, joining her at the door.
She rolled her eyes. “Leave it to you to have football on the brain, even on Christmas. Is there anything that ever penetrates that thick skull of yours besides that sport?”
I just smirked at her. “Wait, what? There’s something that’s supposed to matter more?”
“Family,” she said instantaneously.
Which brought to mind her very absent husband, so I tossed back at her, “And where exactly is that deadbeat husband of yours?”
She flushed, forgetting the notebook, just like I’d planned, and turned away from me. “Garrett is with his grandmother. She needed him. She’s family, too.”
I’d hurt her somehow, and it made me feel like I was even more of an asshole than normal. I put the arm without the notebook tucked under it around her shoulders. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. I’m sorry he isn’t here with you.”
She pushed me away and gave me a weak smile. “It’s just one holiday.”
Her voice was confident, but there was a look in her eyes that wasn’t.
“Do I need to get some people together and burn the distillery to the ground?” I asked.
She laughed. “That would really put a kibosh on your football plans.”
“Only if we got caught.”
“Caught doing what?” Ginny asked as we rounded the corner.
“Setting fire—” I started and was cut off by Edie.
“Nothing!”
Edie punched me on the shoulder and then joined Dalton in the window seat that Ginny had vacated.
“What was that all about?” Ginny asked, frowning up at me.
I shrugged. “Not sure. Think there’s trouble in Gadie-land.”
Ginny grimaced. “Do you have to continue doing the whole ‘ship thing? It’s as if you live in a different decade than the rest of us.”
“When am I going to get to rename you?” I asked, because Ginny hadn’t had a boyfriend in a really long time. Long enough for mutterings to start behind her back about whether she was eventually going to come out of the closet. Ginny and I may not have been as close as we once were, but I was pretty damn sure I’d know if she was gay.
