‘It’s been my pleasure, Jess.’ Lucie pecked a kiss on her cheek. ‘You look worn out. I hope you’re going to get some rest this weekend before the guests arrive on Monday.’
Jess shrugged. ‘It’s the last weekend for the winter festival so I’m sure there will be lots to do. Besides,’ her voice caught in her throat. ‘I’d rather keep busy.’ Her parents were on their way up to collect the boys and take them back to Somerset for Christmas. It was breaking her heart to think about not being with them when they opened their presents on Christmas morning, but she didn’t know what else to do. They deserved to be the centre of attention, and she would be busy looking after their guests. Steve was desperate to see them, and they’d be back with her on the twenty-ninth and then through the new year.
‘Oh, Jess, I didn’t mean to upset you.’ Lucie drew her into a tight hug.
‘Ignore me, I’m being silly.’ Jess laughed through a sniffle. ‘I know the boys will have a wonderful time with Steve and our parents. I just hadn’t expected it to be quite this hard.’ She straightened her shoulders. ‘But this is our life now, and we’ll all have to get used to sharing holidays; better to start sooner rather than later.’
Lucie pulled a clean tissue from her pocket and handed it to her. ‘And we’re going to make such a fuss of them when they come home.’ Though she’d protested against it, the Ludworths had decided to postpone their own official Christmas celebrations until the children were back to share it with them.
‘You didn’t have to do that, you know.’
‘We know.’ Lucie smiled. ‘But Christmas is such a special time when there are little ones to share it with. It was a unanimous decision so don’t bother arguing against it anymore.’
‘I won’t.’ Her phone beeped in her pocket. She scanned the text. ‘It’s Mum. They’ve stopped at the services for a cup of tea. Dad reckons it’ll be no more than an hour once they set off again, I’d better go and make sure everything’s ready upstairs.’ They were staying overnight and setting off early in the morning to get ahead of the weekend traffic if they could. As the guest rooms were all made up ready for next week, Mum and Dad would sleep in her room and she’d sleep in with the boys. Isaac wouldn’t mind the cot for one night, and she liked the idea of having them as close as possible before they headed off.
‘I’ll speak to Betsy now. If we have lunch at one-thirty that will give them a chance to get their bearings first, and still leave time before we have to head down to the village.’ It was the last day of school, and Elijah, long with all the other children, was taking part in the nativity play and carol concert.
‘Sounds good to me.’ Jess gave her another quick hug and they went their separate ways.
Chapter 16
‘You made good time!’ Jess called to her parents as she hurried down the steps to meet them. ‘How was the drive?’
‘Not bad at all,’ her dad replied, giving her a huge bear hug. ‘You’re looking good, flower. All this country air must agree with you.’ Stepping back, he craned his neck as he took in the imposing vista of the castle. ‘What a place!’ He turned to look the other way out of over the gardens. ‘What a view!’
‘It’s pretty amazing, huh?’ Jess walked around the other side to hug her mother. Things had been a little stiff between them since the confrontation at Centre Parcs and Jess was hoping they might improve with a bit of face-time. ‘Hello, Mum. It’s good to see you.’
‘Hello, darling.’ She returned Jess’s hug then smoothed a hand over the jeans she was wearing with a pretty pink jumper and matching gilet. ‘I’m not very dressed up, I’m afraid.’
Jess pointed to her own sweatshirt. ‘Nor am I. It’s very casual here, so don’t worry about it. Arthur and Lucie are waiting inside to say hello, and you’ll meet the others over lunch.’
Her mum’s lips twitched, a habit she had when she was nervous. ‘And they’re the lord and lady of the castle, is that right? What should I call them?’
Jess slung an arm around her mum’s waist and steered her towards the steps. ‘He’s not a lord, he’s a baronet, and you call them Arthur and Lucie.’ She gave her mum a little squeeze. ‘They’re just people, Mum.’
Whatever nerves her mum might have been feeling were soon swept away by Arthur’s natural exuberance and charm. ‘Alan, Wendy, how wonderful to meet you both,’ he said, striding over to shake her dad’s hand and press a quick kiss to her mum’s cheek. ‘Such a shame you’re not staying longer than one night, but we’ll do our best to make you feel at home in the short time we have.’
Lucie stepped forward and hugged Jess’s parents in turn. ‘Welcome to Bluebell Castle. As Arthur said, you must make yourselves at home.’ She kept a gentle hand on Wendy’s shoulder. ‘Come and see what your amazing daughter has done with the decorations. We’re quite overwhelmed by this tree.’
While she took Wendy on a little tour around the great hall, Arthur chatted to her dad about the drive up, the route he’d used and the forecast for the morning. ‘It’ll be icy first thing, but you should have a clear run home.’
Maxwell appeared on cue to relieve her dad of the little overnight case he was carrying and escorted the three of them upstairs, leaving them at the door to the nursery with an instruction to Jess to call if they needed anything.
‘Well,’ her mum said as she removed her gilet and hung it on the back of one of the chairs in the playroom. ‘They’ve certainly tucked you out of the way up here.’
Jess rolled her eyes in her dad’s direction, imploring with him not to let her start. ‘We love it up here, it’s like our own little flat and we come and go as we please. The boys have settled in very well.’
‘I think it’s lovely,’ her dad said. ‘These windows certainly flood the place with sunshine, don’t they? Why don’t you give us the tour, flower?’
Grateful for his support, Jess showed them around. ‘You’ll be in here.’ She showed them the room she’d come to love with its big high bed and slanted ceiling. ‘We have to share the one bathroom, but I’ll make sure the boys have a bath tonight so there’ll be plenty of time for you to have a shower in the morning.’
‘I might have a shower tonight, before bed,’ her dad said. ‘Give your mum time to do her hair and whatnot before we set off in the morning. If it’s as icy as Arthur reckons, we might not want to rush off too quickly. I don’t suppose the gritters get out here much.’
‘We can play it by ear. There’s always a big cooked breakfast buffet at the weekends, and everyone else will be up early as it’s the last of the winter festival weekends.’
Her dad rubbed his hands together. ‘Sounds good to me.’
‘Alan. What did the doctor say to you about your cholesterol?’
‘Come off it, Wend, one fry-up isn’t going to kill me.’ He curled his arm around his wife’s waist. ‘You can’t get rid of me that easily.’ Though she tried to duck away from the big kiss he aimed at her cheek, she was laughing.
Jess found herself smiling. She’d forgotten they could be like this together. ‘You can have a poached egg, Dad, that’ll cut back on the fat.’
His eyes widened. ‘Traitor! I might’ve known you women would gang up on me. Now where’s that youngest grandson of mine? I need someone on my side.’
‘He’s downstairs. Mrs W, the housekeeper has been looking after him while I supervised the last of the decoration installations. Let’s go and fetch him and I can give you a quick tour before lunch.’
Lunch passed in a flurry of friendly conversation as the Ludworths went out of their way to make her parents feel welcome. She didn’t say anything, but merely raised an eyebrow in Tristan’s direction. The look of wide-eyed innocence he gave her only confirmed her suspicions he was behind this full court press of charm. Well, more power to him. If she was going to stay on at the castle, it might help persuade her parents to support that decision now they could see what a nice environment the boys would be living in.
Though she’d tried to be sensible
about it and keep her options open, none of the job searches she’d done had turned up anything suitable nearer to her parents or Steve, and going back to London where her best prospects lay still seemed impossible on one salary, never mind the horrendous cost of childcare she’d have to fork out on top of rent, food and all the other essentials. Trying to build a new business with Tristan would be a risk, but if they could make it work … She closed her eyes for a second. God, if only she had a crystal ball.
There was also the small matter of when and how she was going to tell her parents about Tristan. Her dad would probably take it okay, but she couldn’t see her mum responding well to what would be the final nail in the coffin of her dreams that Jess and Steve would get back together. Probably best to play it by ear and see how the rest of the afternoon and evening went first.
They made quite a parade going down the hill towards the village. In addition to Jess and her parents, the entire Ludworth clan, including Betsy, Mrs W, and Maxwell were enjoying the stroll down in the early afternoon sunshine. As they made their way to the village hall, it seemed like most of the residents of Camland had turned out to join them. While Arthur and Lucie spent some time outside saying hello to everyone, the rest of the group made their way in and managed to claim a block of seats a few rows from the front. A flurry of greetings came Jess’s way from other parents she’d met at the gates over the past few months. ‘You’ve settled in well, here,’ her mum observed as Jess sat down and placed Isaac on the seat beside her.
‘Yes, we all have. It’s a lovely place, Mum …’ A waft of amber aftershave stole the rest of her sentence as Tristan scooped Isaac up and settled himself into the empty seat, with the little boy on his knee.
‘We miscalculated the number of chairs,’ he said with a grin so cheeky she wondered if he’d somehow cooked this up on purpose. Leaning forward she glanced down the row to see it was full, as was the one behind.
‘I can take him.’ She held out her hands to Isaac, who ignored her gesture and nestled himself into the crook of Tristan’s arm.
‘He’s fine where he is, don’t fret.’ A soft touch brushed her hand where it rested between their seats, his little finger curling around hers for an instant before moving away.
Don’t fret? Was he trying to give the game away? Though he’d kissed her during the woodland walk, they’d been out of the glare of the lights and as far as she was aware no one in the family had seen them. He certainly hadn’t made any other public overtures towards her, and she’d not said anything – not even to Lucie, though it had been tempting to ask her advice. And now here he was, holding Isaac like he had every right to, while all but holding hands with her. All it would take was one sharp-eyed observer to put two and two together to set the rumour mill rumbling. Secrets didn’t stay very secret in a little place like this. She shifted her chair a little closer to her mum, just in case.
‘You’ll find it hard to leave, I expect, but then I never understood why you took on this job in the first place, knowing it would only be a temporary position.’
Jess bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself from snapping. Trust her mum to ambush her with this when they were in a public setting. ‘I told you why I wanted to come here, and it’s the best thing I could’ve done for the three of us,’ she said, trying to keep her voice low enough so as not to be overheard.
‘But you’ll be wrenching Elijah out of school now he’s settled in. I never raised you to be selfish, Jessica, but this past year, it’s like you’re a different person.’
‘Enough, Wendy,’ her dad said, placing his hand on his wife’s knee. ‘We’re here to watch our grandson, not make a scene.’
Grateful for his intervention, Jess leaned closer. ‘The boys adapted very well to the move here, and they’ll adapt again when things change in the new year.’ She was prevented from saying any more when Mrs Winters stepped out of the wings onto the centre of the stage and a hush fell over the audience.
‘Thank you everyone for coming. Just a quick reminder that you are welcome to take photos of your child in their costume on the set at the end of the performance should you wish, but we do ask you not to do so during the show. And now, it gives me great pleasure to transport you back to a certain little town you might have heard of …’ As she exited the stage, the curtain opened and the strains of ‘O Little Town of Bethlehem’ began and Jess forgot about everything else other than watching Elijah and all the other children.
‘I think he’s finally asleep.’ Jess said as she joined her parents in the little sitting room in the nursery. ‘I still couldn’t get him to take off his costume.’ Though he hadn’t had a speaking part, Elijah had made the most of being cast as one of the sheep; baaing loudly and generally threatening to upstage the shepherds as he gambolled around on all fours in a white hooded top and black tights and gloves, his face covered in white stage makeup apart from a little black nose they’d drawn in with Iggy’s liquid eyeliner. Jess had insisted on scrubbing his face clean but had given up the fight over the rest of his costume, not wanting his last night at home to turn into an argument. Accepting a glass of wine from her dad, she curled her legs up under her and sank into the corner of the sofa opposite him with a sigh. ‘Thank you.’
Leaning forward, he clinked his glass against hers. ‘Cheers, flower. I was just saying to your mum it’s been a lovely day. Almost a shame we have to go home tomorrow and miss the winter festival.’
Though she hadn’t been looking for it, this could be the perfect opening. ‘Well, you never know, there might be other occasions when you can visit and hopefully stay a bit longer.’
‘But your contract runs out in the new year,’ her mum pointed out. ‘So that hardly seems likely. Speaking of which, what are you going to do next?’
‘Well, I’ve been given the opportunity to stay on here for a bit.’ She tried to keep her tone casual, but it was hard over the thundering of her heart. She hated confrontation, always had.
‘Doing what, exactly?’ Wendy sat up in her chair, brow furrowed in a way Jess knew spelled trouble on the horizon.
‘Tristan wants to open an events management company, and he’s giving me the chance to come on board as a partner. If the house party goes well, we’ll be looking at running several more throughout the year, organise some weddings and might even scout around for other clients in the area who might want our help.’
‘There’s a lot of ifs and mights in that statement,’ her dad pointed out in his soft voice.
‘I know.’ Jess agreed. ‘That’s why I haven’t committed myself to anything yet.’
‘And what about us?’ Wendy set her glass down on the coffee table with an angry click. ‘Don’t we get any say in you moving our grandchildren all the way up here on a permanent basis?’
‘It’s not like I’m emigrating to another continent!’ Though she hadn’t wanted to start a row, Jess found it impossible to keep the frustration from her voice. ‘How long did it take you to drive up here? Four hours? It doesn’t take much less than that to get to London from Somerset, for God’s sake. Did I say anything when you decided to move out to the country just after Eli was born, and you know, just maybe I might have needed my mum on hand to help me? No, of course, I didn’t because I wanted what was best for you.’
Her mother stared at her, eyes brimming with hurt. ‘You never said you needed my help.’
God, it was enough to make her want to scream. ‘I’d just had a baby, Mum, of course I needed your help. But you and Isla got it into your head about Somerset, and I was so bloody glad you were selling the Kennington house, I kept my mouth shut and let you get on with it.’ Jess hugged her arms around her knees. ‘Getting stuck on the A303 for hours on end with a screaming baby in the car was still a better prospect than ever having to walk across that threshold again.’ In the years following Marcus’s death, she’d never once been able to enter their childhood home without being transported back to that awful night when her world had fallen apart.
&nbs
p; Her dad reached out to grip her hand. ‘We didn’t know you felt that way, flower. You never said anything.’
Jess returned his squeeze. ‘Because no one was allowed to say anything, were they? We all had to act like everything was normal.’ She choked on a sob, wishing like hell she could keep the lid locked firmly on this can of worms, but unable to help the words from spilling out. ‘God, it was like Marcus simply vanished one day, and we had to pretend like nothing bad had happened.’
‘How dare you say that!’ Her mother’s voice was shrill. ‘We had pictures of him everywhere, same as we do in the new house. I think about him every day.’ It was true. Though her mother had cleared out Marcus’s room with an unholy speed, turning it into a guest bedroom with pastel watercolours on walls that used to be smothered in band posters and pin-up girls, the rest of the house had become a shrine to his memory.
‘But those pictures were only your version of the truth, Mum. You plastered the walls in all those happy family scenes of when we were kids, but it was like time stopped in 2007 when Marcus first go into trouble and didn’t start again until the day Steve and I got married. You erased the last five years of his life, and erased a huge part of me in the process too.’
Her mum was crying now, huge theatrical sobs that shook her whole body, but managed to produce very little in the way of tears. Jess’s dad jumped off the sofa and put his arms around her. ‘Shh, love, shh. She doesn’t mean to upset you, do you Jess?’ He sent her an appealing look across the room.
Oh God, he was going to do it again. He was going to let Mum off the hook and allow her to deflect the conversation, just like always. She stared at him for a long moment. ‘No. I didn’t mean to upset you, Mum. Please don’t cry.’ The words were empty, as hollow as the feeling inside her.
Starlight Over Bluebell Castle (Bluebell Castle, Book 3) Page 18
