by Lisa Shelby
He lifts up so his weight is on his forearms, hovering above me. His eyes convey love and respect and ask permission at the same time. I give him a small nod, letting him know I want this as much as he does, and he wastes no time getting his boxers off.
He kisses me deeply, passionately, and I breathe his name into his mouth. I’ve been waiting for what feels like a lifetime for this moment. The firmness of his length pressing against me, the anticipation of feeling him inside me has me writhing beneath him...
Ping.
The sound of a text message coming through on my phone effectively shuts down what was about to be one of the best dreams of my life, but instead, I’m met with the stark reality that it’s time to get up, and when I do, he won’t be here.
He deserves his time off, but I’m wondering how I’m going to breathe with him gone for three days. Just the thought of the next three days without him somewhere in the house sours my mood and pushes away the memories of last night.
Stretching awake, I’m met with the darkness thanks to the black-out window coverings in my room. I fumble for the remote, and the hum of the motor that opens the curtains lets me know I found the right button. Gradually, the bright SoCal sun fills the room. When Josh first moved to LA, I used to love waking up to the bright sun, but I’ve grown immune to the bountiful vitamin D, and it no longer invigorates me like it once did. Now, it leaves me feeling exposed.
Rolling over to face the empty pillow next to me, I’m surprised to find a piece of paper filling the space where his scruffy face had been last night. My stomach flutters with anticipation as I snatch the folded piece of paper and sit up against the headboard to read it.
Firefly,
I hope you have a good day. I’ll be doing my best trying to breathe while I’m away. If you need me, just call.
XOXO,
Chapter 20
Twenty-six words and the letter M.
This was all I needed.
With this, I’ll be able to get through my day.
Bounding out of bed, I throw on an oversized sweater and float on air to the kitchen where I find Josh sipping his coffee in Max’s usual perch, and it annoys me. We may have to make that spot reserved seating only.
He notices me and stands up straight, crossing his arms and lifting a perfectly manicured eyebrow. He’s up to no good.
“What?”
“Oh, my sweet Emmy. You are always full of surprises, aren’t you?”
No, no, no. Please tell me he didn’t figure it out.
“Josh, what in the world are you talking about? I just got up. Haven’t really had a chance to do anything surprising yet.”
“Speaking of sleeping, did you sleep well?”
“I did, how about you?”
“I bet you did.”
“And what exactly is that supposed to mean?”
“Well, you see, I didn’t sleep well. Had a lot on my mind. You know, like how I could have been so awful to my best friend. I guess you could say the guilt was getting to me.” I try to speak, but he wags his finger at me and continues. “Around 4:30, I finally gave up and got up.”
Crap, I know where this is going.
“Imagine my surprise when I see a large man creeping away from your bedroom door. For the briefest moment, I thought we had an intruder, but when I got a better look at him, it turned out it was a certain brooding member of our security team.”
The flaming hot blush burning my cheeks says it all.
“Maximus Hopper. I get it now.”
“Josh…”
“Emmy, I mean it. He’s hot as hell, smart, and from what I know of him, a pretty decent guy.”
“Josh, he’s everything.” My insides tumble around when I hear myself say it out loud because it’s true, and I can’t believe I’ve found him.
The smile on Josh’s face is the one I know and love. Not the fake one seen on red carpets and magazine covers. No, this is a smile that says he couldn’t be happier for me. He rounds the island and pulls me into a hug.
“Tell me everything.”
“My feet are killing me, but man, was it worth it. The McKinleys know how to throw a charity gala.” I pull my three-inch heels off my feet and prop them on Josh’s lap moaning when he begins to rub them. My eyes fall shut, but I can still see the bright flashes of the paparazzi who ascended on us in just the twenty feet we had to walk from the exit doors to the car. I really don’t know how Josh does it.
“Tonight was fun.” He gives my foot a squeeze, and I open my eyes to look at him. “I’ve missed you, Emmy. I’m glad we were able to spend the day together.”
The passing headlights of the cars going the opposite direction on Santa Monica Boulevard highlight his features as they go by. He looks content. Happy.
“It was a really good day.”
It’s true. Today, Josh and I were simply two best friends from Eastern Oregon hanging out like we always have. We sat in the kitchen and drank our coffee while I shared all the details about how Max and I became an us. The idea of the two of us being a couple is still new and still so secret. It was the first time I had said any of it out loud, and it felt really good.
After coffee, we went for a swim.
Outside.
During the first week of December!
Southern California temperatures, along with the heated pool and heat lamps next to the poolside tables, made for a perfect morning topped off with lunch prepared by Greta. We ate, we talked, and we tried to dunk each other in the pool. We even scored each other's dives off the diving board just like we used to with The Crew back home on the lake. We may get a lot more height with a diving board, but it’s not the same without the rest of the gang here with us. But it was still fun.
It was nice not to have Jace around today. I know it’s selfish of me, and I really like him, I do, but it was still nice.
Jace has always welcomed me with open arms, and if Josh loves him, then I do too. It’s just so rare that I’m in a room with Josh, and he isn’t there. It’s understandable; he’s not just his manager but he’s his person. If I could be with Max every minute of the day, that would be just fine with me. So there aren’t any hard feelings, but it’s been great to have a day to ourselves.
We may be in a blacked-out SUV, being driven by a member of Josh’s security team and he may be decked out in an Armani suit while I’m in lounging in the back seat in my black strapless Chanel gown, but we’re still just a couple of small-town kids living an extraordinary life. At least for the moment.
“I hate that production is delayed, but I’m really glad I got to come home for a little while.”
“I wish we got to hang out like this more often, especially if it means I get foot rubs.” He pinches my foot. “I’m just kidding. I’m glad you’re home too. Do you think you’ll get to come home for Christmas now that your schedule is pushed back?”
“It’s up in the air right now, but I know Jace is trying to work his magic. At least now I won’t feel so guilty about you being alone here in La La Land while I’m gone. You have your boy toy now.”
“Josh!” I hiss, nodding my head toward Reeves in the driver’s seat who I can only assume doesn’t know about Max and me.
“Shit, that’s right. I’m so sorry, Emmy. This whole thing really sucks,” he says in a quiet voice I can barely hear.
“It’s fine. It’s only a year, eight months, and three weeks.”
“But who’s counting, right?”
Distracted by a phone call, Reeves isn’t paying attention to us. Dropping my feet to the floor of the car, I take his hand in mine and hope that even in the darkness of the back seat, Josh can see the sincerity in my eyes.
“When this all started, I didn’t know something might be waiting for me on the other side. Now that I do have something waiting for me, I can’t help the anticipation. But Josh, I will always be here for you. As much as I hate that the world is such that we have to be in the situation we’re in, I couldn’t be happier to be here wi
th you. Please don’t doubt that.”
Kissing the back of my hand, he whispers, “Love you.”
“Love you right back.”
Pulling up the long driveway to Josh’s house, it’s strange that Reeves doesn’t pull up front. Instead, he pushes the button to open the garage door and pulls the car inside.
“Everything okay?” Josh asks, loosening his tie and undoing the top button on his pristine black shirt.
“Mr. Hopper is waiting inside, sir, and he’ll explain.”
A sinking sensation fills the pit of my stomach, wondering why Max is here, and not to mention, why we had to park inside the garage. He hadn’t been able to attend the gala since he got Nick at the last minute and sent Smith in his place, so he shouldn’t be here.
Reeves opens the door for me, and I wait for Josh to come around to my side of the car before following him into the house. Josh takes my hand, guiding me through the garage and into the house. All the while, the tapping of my red-bottomed shoes and the swooshing of the yards upon yards of fabric of my beautiful gown echo in my ears.
I hear him before I see him. His voice is low. Angry. My free hand gathers my heavy dress, lifting it so I don’t trip on it. I’m ready to run into his arms, but the gentle squeeze from Josh reminds me that he’s the only hand I get to hold tonight.
Entering command central, also known as the dining room, I feel my heart plummet when his beautiful head lifts and his gaze finds mine as if there is nowhere and nobody else to look at.
His eyes say everything I’m feeling.
That his instinct is also to rush to me and pull me into his arms, but that’s not possible, and that hurts my heart.
“Just tell us what’s going on. Don’t sugarcoat it. Just spit it out,” I blurt out before anyone else has a moment to speak.
Smith begins to fill us in, but Max cuts him off.
“Miss Ford, we aren’t exactly sure what’s going on. There was a threat left on the front steps of the house, but we have no idea who left it there. Smith was walking the perimeter in anticipation of your arrival home, and the package was there when he finished his loop.”
“But you checked the cameras, right? You must have gotten a good look at the asshole?” No longer holding my hand, Josh stands with his feet shoulder-width apart and his arms folded across his chest.
This is his stubborn, I’m not moving until you tell me what I want to hear stance. I haven’t seen it in years. I think the last time was when one of the guys back home was trying to drive home after too much beer, and he stood just like this in front of their truck, refusing to move until they got out and handed over his keys.
“Mr. West, somehow, they hacked into the security system because about ten seconds are missing from the video we pulled. Sir, I am sorry for the breach, but I assure you my team is on top of it.”
“How can someone hack into our security system? How is that even possible?” I ask. Not accusingly but in real wonder.
Max’s eyes plead with me to forgive him. He feels responsible. He’s in charge of our safety, and he feels like he let not just me but also Josh and everyone else down.
“The truth is it’s either a computer expert who can breach a system like the one Mr. West has on-site, or it’s somebody on the inside with access.”
The air whooshes out of my lungs, and my dress billows out under me as I drop down into the closest chair. Thank God for that chair because my legs weren’t going to hold me up a second longer.
Looking around the room, I find it impossible to think it could be anyone present. Reeves was with us. Smith was here and outside at the time. He does have access to the system, but he’s been with Josh for so long. I can’t imagine Max would have anyone working for him who he couldn’t vouch for, and I know I haven’t known him long, but I trust him with my life.
Then there’s Jace, who always has his face in his phone and his thumbs moving a mile a minute. No, it couldn’t be Jace. He’s the love of Josh’s life, and his entire life is centered around taking care of him. I drop my head and give it a shake, trying to ward off the dark thoughts going through my mind about everyone in the room. I know it’s not Josh, and it certainly isn’t me.
Greta went home early since we were eating out, and the housekeeping staff wasn’t in today. But they do have access to the security room—we all do. I don’t know how to do anything with the cameras, but I have access to it just like everyone else does.
No!
Stop it, Emmett!
It’s not anybody on the inside. That is just crazy.
“Bullshit!” Josh yells at Max.
“I’m sure you’re right, Mr. West, but we have to explore every possible theory.”
“You hearing this shit, Jace?”
“Kinda hard not to when I’m standing right here with the rest of you.” Never lifting his eyes from his phone, he almost seems annoyed with Josh for interrupting him.
Josh moves closer to him until he’s standing directly in front of him. If looks could kill, Jace would be dead on the floor. “What the fuck are you working on that is more important than this?” Josh taps Jace’s phone, and it falls on the ground.
Whoa.
I’ve never seen the two of them share a cross word, but I too would like to know what in the world he could be working on at a time like this.
“Josh, calm down. I’m trying to figure out which slimeball paparazzi took the pictures. Whoever this is has to have a contact with one of the paps. I’m trying to see which websites have posted these exact pictures. If I can figure that out, then I can reach out to my contacts and see if I can get them to spill who they bought the shots from.” He holds up his phone, and even I can see from my seat that he’s got the pics of Josh and me tonight walking the red carpet at the gala, and he’s on Online Buzz because the site's name is plastered across the top of the screen. “I’ve been here all night. I don’t need the debrief. I was here when it happened.”
Josh wipes his hands over his face in frustration. “Fuck, Jace. I’m sorry. Ba...dude, you know I’m just freaked out, and it looked like you weren’t listening.”
My soul sags at the sound of Josh wanting to call Jace “babe” but stopping himself. God, I hate that he has to hide who he really is. Everyone in this room knows the truth, but he still can’t let himself go there.
“I get it, but you know I’m always looking out for you. Your best interest is always my top priority. Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to get back to it?”
The sound of pinging phones bounces around the room, and my clutch vibrates. I open my bag to grab my phone, but Max rounds the table and puts his hand on top of mine just as Josh curses under his breath.
“Don’t.”
He’s so close.
His touch sends a wave of heat over my body, and his scent is like aromatherapy to my libido. Leaning in front of me, he’s so close that I can see each beautiful detail of his face, the salt and pepper at his temples, and each one of his tiny yet beautiful scars.
When I don’t reply, he pleads with me again in a whisper that I’m not sure the rest of the room can hear. “Please don’t.”
“Is it that bad?”
“Sweetie, just don’t. Let one of us delete it,” Josh, white as a ghost, says, siding with Max.
Even though it goes against every fiber of my being, I let Max take the phone out of my purse, and with his big palm over the screen, he holds it out to me so I can unlock it with my thumb. The look on his face serious and apologetic. I’m not sure how these new images could be worse than what we’ve already seen, but they must be bad if they’re all protecting me like this.
He nods his appreciation, but his eyes don’t linger when he walks away.
“Mr. West, we need to discuss how this will change the red carpet tomorrow night,” Max says, standing at the other end of the table.
“Should we just skip it altogether?”
“No, I don’t think we need to go to that extreme, but we do know that thi
s only seems to happen when Miss Ford is in the press. Maybe we should see what happens if she doesn’t walk the carpet with you.”
“Works for me. I would certainly rather go alone if it means keeping her safe.”
“But I promised Nikki. It’s her first film,” I whine in protest.
“No offense, Emmy, but I think she’ll survive if you aren’t there.” He tugs on the tie that’s been hanging loose around his neck. The joy of our day has been washed away and replaced with fear and exhaustion.
Countering, I stand to get my point across. “Bullshit, why should this scumbag get to control my life? We’ll bring extra security instead of just Reeves.”
Jace excuses himself when his phone rings.
“Miss Ford is right. If she insists on attending, we will make sure Reeves is assigned to you. I’ll be with Miss Ford, and then we’ll have Smith and Cleveland at the front and back entrances. If we need more men, I’ll call them in.” He shifts his feet, his hands in the front pockets of his jeans as he speaks to Josh, but his attention focuses on me. “But it would be ideal if you arrived in different vehicles, and you did the carpet on your own, sir. We could have Miss Ford meet you inside.”
“So you’re gonna sneak me in the back door or something?”
“Something like that.” His stance reflects calm, but his tone and the intensity in his eyes are deadly serious.
“Works for me. I hate the red carpet anyway, and I still get to be there for Nikki. Josh, does that work for you?”
“Only if you’re sure, Emmy. You don’t have to go at all.”
“I really want to go.”
“Okay, thanks, man. I appreciate it,” Jace interrupts as he enters the room, concluding his call.
