by SJ McCoy
She laughed and pushed at his arm. “You know what I mean. You could peel off two blocks before me and get home to bed. I’ll be fine.”
“No way. You might not want me to take you all the way …” he smirked at her, “but I’m at least going to walk you all the way up to your door, so I know you got home safe.”
She made a face. “Okay, thank you.”
They walked on in silence for a little while. Logan had so much he wanted to say, but he had no idea where to start, and he had a feeling that no matter what he said, she’d think that he was either joking or worse, trying to get her into bed.
“What was your story with those girls?” he asked eventually. It wasn’t safe to say anything about how he was feeling. It’d be better to ask her to talk more about herself. He realized now that he knew so little about her.
“I met them at college. It was a small, liberal arts college. Very exclusive. They were all there on family money—just spending four years going to parties and having fun.”
“How did you fall in with them? They don’t strike me as your kind of people.”
She shrugged. “At that point in my life, I didn’t have any kind of people. I was very shy, not social. I’d grown up in a very sheltered life.”
“Wow. I would never have guessed that about you.”
“Are you making fun of me?”
“No! Hell, no. I mean it. You’re so outgoing and down-to-earth. You’re friends with everyone.”
“I’ve come out of my shell a lot in the last few years, but I still don’t have many friends. I have Maria and Angel, and that’s about it, really. I know other people, and everyone here is so friendly, but …”
“And me. You have me and Colt and Austin and Luke and Zack.”
She smiled. “I know, but it’s not like we’re close, really, is it. We hang out as part of the same group, but that’s about it. I know I could turn to any of you if ever I needed anything, but you know what I mean. We’re not real friends.”
He was surprised how much that hurt. It shouldn’t, really. He hadn’t acted like a true friend toward her, until tonight. She was right. “I think of you as my friend.”
“Thanks. I’m not saying I don’t think of you as one, but you know what I mean. My point was that I glommed onto Lucy and Jana in college, and they let me hang around, but I always felt kind of inferior. If I’m honest, I think they only kept me around because Courtney had a thing for my brother, and Lucy felt sorry for me. To make things worse, they were all from money, and I was there on a full ride scholarship.”
Logan shook his head. “It’s so strange to hear what it was like for you. I’ve always seen you as this super-confident, super-together hot chick. You’re a bit intimidating if I’m honest. I can’t imagine you feeling second best to those girls. They’re ten-a-penny, and you’re one-in-a-million.”
“Aww.” She leaned her head on his shoulder and looked up into his eyes, making his heart beat faster. He came back down to earth at her next words. “I can see how you sweet-talk all those women into bed; you know all the right lines.”
“It’s not a line, Rox. I mean it.”
“Yeah, right. Remember who you’re talking to. It’s only me. You don’t need to bullshit me.”
He stopped walking and caught hold of her arm, pulling her back to him. “I’m not. I’d never bullshit you.”
Her eyes widened when he put his hands on her shoulders and looked down into her eyes.
“You’re gorgeous, and you’re smart and real, and even though, apparently, you don’t think of me as a real friend, I think of you as one. I’m not feeding you lines to make you feel better. I’m being honest about the way I see you compared to the way I see those girls—and the way I see most women. You’re so much more, so much better.”
He hoped she’d believe him, but instead, she laughed. “Ha. I’m so much better than them, but they’re the ones you want to sleep with?”
He sucked in a deep breath. “That’s just sex.”
She shook her head. “I know. I’m sorry. I don’t know what I’m talking about.” She pulled away from him and started walking again.
He hurried to catch up with her. “You think I don’t want to sleep with you?”
She laughed, a harsh little sound that held no humor. “I’m not that stupid. I’m a female with a pulse. I’d do, right?”
He pursed his lips. It was a low blow, but he could hardly argue with her. “I guess I deserve that. I’ve never pursued you because you’re worth more than that.”
She walked on in silence for a few moments, and then she stopped abruptly. Logan hadn’t realized it, but they’d reached her house.
She gave him a sad smile. “I’d like to think that you’re worth more than that, too.”
The way she said it, the way she looked him, he felt his heart swell in his chest. She made it seem like she really cared about him—and he had no idea what to do with that.
She unlatched the front gate then looked up at him. “Thanks for tonight. You’re a good friend.”
She was turning away from him, starting to walk down the path to her front door. He didn’t want her to go, but he could only stand there watching.
She turned back when she reached the front door. “Goodnight, Logan.”
“Wait a minute.” He hurried down the path after her, and, when he reached her, he slid his arms around her waist.
“What are you doing?”
The honest answer was that he had no idea. He smiled. “What I’ve wanted to do for a long time.” He slid his fingers into her hair and glanced at her lips before looking up into her eyes.
“Can I kiss you, Rox?”
A little sigh escaped her lips, and she sagged against him before she nodded. “Yes.”
He pressed her back against the front door and closed his arm around her as she slid hers up around his neck.
Her lips were full and soft; they tasted so sweet as he ran his tongue over them. Her full breasts heaved against him as she hesitantly kissed him back. She sank her fingers in his hair, and all thoughts of restraint or finesse left his head. He crushed his lips against hers, and she opened up, letting him in as he claimed her mouth in a deep kiss that should leave no doubt about whether he wanted her.
When they finally came up for air, her cheeks were flushed, and her breath was coming deep and slow.
He ran his thumb over her cheek. “I’m sorry, babe; I couldn’t resist.”
“Don’t say you’re sorry. Phew! Wow.” She blew out a sigh. “I’m going to go inside now, because otherwise I’ll invite you to come in with me, and I think we’d both regret that tomorrow.”
She was right. He knew it. He’d love to go inside with her, but he’d already told her she was worth more than just a quickie. “I can’t disagree with you, but I can tell you I’d only regret it because this isn’t the right way to start.”
“Start what?”
“Start figuring out if we can take this somewhere.”
She looked stunned. He felt stunned. He hadn’t known he was going to say that.
“Where … where do you want to take it?”
He smiled. “You know I have no idea how this works. So, how about the first place we take it is for lunch tomorrow?”
She searched his face for a long moment.
“Before you ask me if I’m serious, I can tell you that yes, I am.”
She smiled. “Okay, then. Lunch. Tomorrow. Call me.”
Her smile filled his heart with hope. Though he didn’t want to examine too closely what it was he was hoping for. He dropped his head and brushed his lips over hers. “I will. At ten-thirty. Now go inside before I try to persuade you take me with you.”
She laughed and opened the door. “You mean before I drag you in?”
He nodded emphatically. “Go. Quick. Close that door.”
“Goodnight, Logan.” She closed the door and left him standing there, staring at it.
He grinned and knocked.
He laughed. “Are you still right there?”
“Yep. My knees are too much like jelly to go anywhere yet.”
“Mine, too.”
She laughed. “But you don’t want me to open the door again?”
“Noooo! I want that more than anything, but it wouldn’t be right. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Okay. See you then.”
He couldn’t help grinning to himself as he walked back the last few blocks to his house. This was a crazy idea. But it was one he couldn’t resist.
~ ~ ~
Roxy stood with her back pressed against the front door for a long while, even after she heard the front gate click closed, and she was sure that Logan had left.
When she finally pushed herself away from the door, she made her way into the kitchen, where she poured herself a glass of water. She took a long cold drink and set the glass down.
Wow! That was the only thing her stunned brain could think. Wow, wow, wow! That kiss! She’d had an inkling that he’d be a good kisser—and that he’d be even better at everything that came after kissing—but nothing could have prepared her for the way he’d made her feel.
A shiver ran down her spine. She almost wished that her willpower had been a little less robust. He could be in her bed right now … but no. She needed to get a grip. She hadn’t learned anything she didn’t already know. Logan was gorgeous, the most attractive man she’d known in real life, and he knew how to kiss, and he knew how to turn a woman on. She’d already known all of that. She’d known it, but she hadn’t experienced it before—and now that she had … No!
It had been a momentary lapse on her part—to be fair, she’d only gone along with it because he’d been so sweet about not wanting her to get hurt by her old friends. He’d taken her by surprise with how protective and thoughtful he’d been. But it was only a temporary glitch.
By next weekend, Lucy and the girls would no longer be here—and a whole new set of visitors would be. Logan would be back to his usual ways, and, hopefully, she’d have come back to her senses. Sure, she liked him, but so did pretty much every other woman who met him. She wasn’t actively seeking a relationship, but when she embarked on one, it would be with a guy who wanted to explore something with her—not with a guy who wanted to explore every attractive woman who crossed his path.
She went through to the living room and sat down on the sofa; she was too wired to go to bed just yet. She jumped when her cell phone rang, and she pulled it out of her purse.
“Hello?”
“Hey, it’s Angel. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. What’s up?”
“I just wanted to check on you. I didn’t get to say goodbye before you left, and then I heard that you’d gone with Logan.” Angel laughed. “I wasn’t sure if I should call or leave you in peace.”
Roxy chuckled. “If I was doing what you suspected, then I wouldn’t have answered the phone, so you would have been fine either way.”
“That’s what I decided. So, he’s gone? Or are you still with him?”
“He’s gone. He walked me home, that’s all.”
“Oh, okay. I wondered if the two of you might …”
“For a minute there, so did I. So did he. But common sense prevailed.”
“Are you glad?”
Roxy sighed. “I’m sure I will be by tomorrow. Right now, I’m sitting here wondering if I should have invited him in. On the one hand, I don’t want to be just one more girl that he’s slept with. On the other—why not be? What’s the big deal? But then I remember; it’d make things too weird. He’s a friend, one of the gang, and how would I feel every weekend watching him go home with another girl and another? I don’t think I’d like that. He’s a friend. And after tonight, he feels like even more of a friend.”
“You don’t think there’s any chance you and he could be more than that?”
Roxy laughed. “Remember who we’re talking about? I’ve never known him to see any girl for longer than a weekend.”
“I know. I just thought that maybe the two of you might get together.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Okay. Well, I won’t keep you. I just wanted to make sure that you’re okay.”
“Thanks. I’m fine.”
“I’m going into work in the morning, but I’ll only be over there for a few hours. What are you doing? Do you want to meet up for lunch?”
Roxy smiled through pursed lips. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“I said I’d have lunch with Logan.”
“Oookay. But there’s nothing going on between the two of you?”
“Nope. I’m not even sure if he’ll call to confirm like he said he would, but if he does, we’ll have lunch. I think we probably need to make our peace and set things straight after tonight.”
“What do you need to set straight? Did something happen between you?”
Roxy couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face. “We might have kissed—just a little bit.”
Angel squealed. “I like it! I think this is the start of something. I do.”
“Don’t get your hopes up. You sound like one of the voices in my head. Unfortunately, the other voice is louder, stronger, and more realistic. You know how he usually spends his Friday nights. He gave that up in order to go out of his way to help me out. A goodnight kiss is the least he deserved as a thank you.”
Angel sighed. “If you say so. But I’m going to keep my fingers crossed that it meant more than that. I know you like him—and it seemed to me, and to everyone else tonight, that he likes you, too.”
Roxy’s tummy flipped over at the thought that he might actually be interested in her, but she came back down to earth with a bump. Even if he were, there was nothing that she would want to do about it. She hadn’t had many boyfriends, but she knew that she wouldn’t want to date someone like Logan.
“Aren’t you going to say anything?”
“I don’t know what to say, Angel. Yes, I like him, but it’s a road to nowhere. I don’t have the self-confidence to date a guy like him, even if he wanted to.”
Angel blew out a sigh. “That’s crazy talk, but it’s late, and we don’t know if it’s pointless talk yet, anyway. But do me a favor, would you? After lunch tomorrow—whether you go with Logan or not—call me, and we’ll meet up?”
“I’ll call you, but I’m sure you have better things to do on your day off. I’ll see you at work on Monday, anyway.”
“If you don’t call me, I’ll call you.”
Roxy smiled. “Okay. I’ll call you. Now get off the phone and go tell Luke that I’m sorry you took so long. I’m sure he’s waiting for you.”
Angel chuckled. “You’re right. I said I’d only be a minute.”
“So, go. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
After she’d hung up, Roxy plugged her phone in to charge and made her way up to bed. As she brushed her teeth, she looked herself in the eye in the mirror. She wasn’t bad looking, she knew that. She was no great beauty, but she had her good points. She’d never been the prettiest in her group of friends, and she knew she never would be. She wondered about that as she rinsed her face. Why did she believe that physical beauty determined the hierarchy of her circle of friends? In college, Lucy and Jana had been the prettiest—and the ones in charge. Lucy was kinder, and Jana was bossier, but they were unquestionably the leaders of the group. And they were the most popular with the boys.
Roxy continued to mull it over as she got ready for bed. Was it because the boys went after them that she saw them as somehow superior? And if so—why? It didn’t make them any smarter, and it certainly didn’t make them better people than her. She shook her head and turned off the light. For some reason, she’d allowed herself to believe that she wasn’t as worthy as they were, and that was dumb. Was that why she didn’t consider the possibility of her and Logan getting together to be realistic—because he was popular with the opposite sex and s
he wasn’t? Did she think he was somehow better than her? No! She just knew that he wasn’t the kind of guy to be satisfied with just one woman—and she wasn’t the kind of girl who’d be happy to be one of many—no matter how well he might satisfy her!
Chapter Six
Logan rolled over and looked at the clock on his nightstand. Seven-twenty. Way too early to be waking up on a Saturday morning. He sat up. He missed the days when he used to be able to lie in bed and get back to sleep. He smiled as he got out of bed. If he was honest, it wasn’t that often that he woke up in his own bed on a Saturday morning—or a Sunday for that matter—to be able to get back to sleep. And during the week, he was always up and out as soon as he woke up. There was so much to do at work.
He went downstairs and brewed himself some coffee, wishing that he hadn’t let his thoughts stray toward work. There were a few things that he’d like to get done, but Nate had pretty much banned him from going in on Saturdays. In the early days, when Logan had first been brought in to turn things around, he’d practically lived on-site. He slept in his office more nights than he’d slept here at home. Things ran much more smoothly these days, and there was no need for him to put in the kind of hours that he used to. But still, whenever he had free time, his thoughts strayed to work and it wasn’t usually too long before his truck took him in that direction, too.
He took his coffee upstairs. He had three hours before he could even call Roxy, and then it would probably be a couple more before she’d want to meet up. Now, in the cold light of morning, he was questioning the advisability of having lunch with her at all. Last night had been great. Especially that kiss on her doorstep. But that was the thing with kissing; it was only a precursor to what happened next. What happened next happened in bed. And taking Roxy to bed was a bad idea. There were friends, and there were fucks. It was an undeniable reality as far as Logan was concerned. Roxy was a friend—therefore, she couldn’t be a … he couldn’t … He shook his head to clear the images that were starting to form. Images of Roxy, her full breasts, her ample ass, her beautiful face. It was a bad idea. But it was one he couldn’t shake.
