by Abby Ayles
“With gladness for one I consider as a sister,” Juliana said.
Her eyes sparkled as she looked at Mary, perceiving that their scheme had worked and would give her at least some relief. “I could never allow you to go without a dance, my dearest Lady Mary.”
“Then it is settled,” John said with obvious relief. “My duties are once more firmly appropriated to their correct place. Oh, what must you think of me, ladies?
“I must seem some uncivilized lout, unfamiliar with the cordiality of pleasant society. I swear to you, it was a lapse, no more. I had not thought it to be a slight.”
“No offense is taken on my part,” Mary said, twisting her gloved hands together. “All is forgiven.”
“I am right glad to hear it,” John announced, wiping a hand quickly over his brow. “The dancing should begin anon. You ladies are too kind to me, too kind indeed.”
Chapter 22
“You will keep her in your sights?” Edmund asked, for the thousandth time.
“Of course I will,” Christopher said, trying to keep any facetiousness out of his tone.
“Joanna and I are far too tired, what with the crying in the night, and the feeding, and all the rest of it,” Edmund said.
“Normally I would be happy to chaperone her, but I did not foresee just how much work it would be! Such a small thing. It’s hard to credit it.”
“Such is the way of babes.”
“Yes, well. Still. You will keep her in your line of sight at all times – even when she is dancing – even if you are dancing?” Edmund continued to fret.
“Brother, it is not my first ball,” Christopher assured him, tightening the cufflinks on his finest dress uniform. “It is not even my first ball with Patience.”
Edmund’s jaw tightened, and Christopher perceived that perhaps reminding him of the occasion when he snuck his younger sister out to a masquerade without permission had been a poor choice.
He was saved, however, by the sound of an infant squalling from the other room, which had Edmund’s attention snapping in another direction.
“Hold that thought,” he muttered, striding away and raising his voice as he did so. “Joanna? Is the babe well?”
Christopher chuckled to himself, shaking his head as he checked his appearance in the old glass above his fireplace.
Edmund had become a protective father: perhaps too much so. Every time the baby raised its voice, he was striding off to check on it.
Perhaps it was not to be unexpected; after losing both of his parents, and then seeing his youngest brother and the love of his life both almost succumb to illness, there was no wonder he was a little nervous.
As far as Christopher could tell, there was absolutely nothing wrong with the child: she had a good, strong set of lungs, that much was certain.
At least Elizabeth’s cries had distracted him from their conversation. Christopher knew that he had been far from dependable in the past, and had indeed allowed Patience almost to fall into the clutches of his former friend.
But all of that was far behind him now – surely it was.
He would be a good chaperone, this time.
“Christopher, are you ready?” Patience called impatiently from the hallway outside of his room.
With another glance at himself, Christopher rolled his shoulders and stepped outside.
It was not as though he needed to take careful attention of his appearance this night – Juliana was far away, and would not see him. Any other ladies he might meet, well, they were nothing to him, and their opinions much the same.
“I’m ready,” he told her, grinning at how eager she was. “But our carriage is not set to depart for another quarter of the hour yet.”
“You are such a bore,” Patience said, punctuating the last word with a stomp of her foot on the wooden floorboards. “Why can’t we just go?”
“Wait to say goodnight to Edmund, first,” Christopher said, laying off teasing her. “I daresay he won’t have the energy to remain awake for our return, even if he tries to. I think little Elizabeth kept him up for most of the night again.”
“And me,” Patience sniffed. “Why does she have to be in the room next to mine?”
“You know why,” Christopher said, shaking his head at her.
The room had lain vacant; once Edmund’s room, before he had taken up residence in the master bedroom after their parents’ death. It was past time that someone else used it again.
Patience only sighed, and tossed her head. “Well, let’s go find him then, so we can be off,” she demanded.
After more admonishments and warnings, Edmund finally let them both out of his sight long after the carriage had been due to depart.
Joanna, who seemed to still carry a happy glow in spite of her sleepless nights, only sent them on their way with a kiss on Patience’s forehead.
Patience was almost incapable of sitting still inside the carriage. She bounced on her seat, kicked her heels against the floor, and looked from window to window so often that Christopher was getting dizzy just watching her.
“You’ll wear yourself out before we even get to the ball,” he remarked lazily, leaning his head back against the seat.
“No, I won’t,” Patience retorted immediately.
“Imagine how terrible it would be if we were to get all the way to the Haverham estate, disembark from our carriage, and then discover that you were already too tired for dancing,” he said.
Patience stopped moving almost immediately, sitting on her hands to keep them from fidgeting.
Christopher barked out a laugh at her reaction. “You are quite taken with this young man, aren’t you, sister?”
Patience had the girlish grace to bring a little color into her cheeks, even as a sly smile crept its way onto her mouth.
“He writes such wonderful letters,” she said.
“So long as that is all they are,” Christopher remarked, thinking in particular of the kind of things that Jasper would normally act upon after sending a letter.
“He is the perfect gentleman,” Patience scolded him. “My Lord Haverham is quite traditional. He even insists that we are always properly chaperoned.”
“I am impressed,” Christopher remarked, privately hoping that the boy was not some sort of monk who felt the need for a courtship as a cover.
“I shall dance with him all night,” Patience declared, looking out of the window with a wistful sigh and a dreamy smile.
Christopher for once said nothing, though a dozen smart remarks came to his mind. He let her have her happiness. She deserved it, after all.
The ball was already lively when they stepped through the doors of the Haverham mansion, and Christopher thought that if Patience looked around her any more animatedly for Edward, that her head might fall off.
He steered her by the arm into the ballroom, where everyone was gathered to wait for the first dance.
“He will find you anon,” Christopher said, reassuringly. “But first, dear sister mine, might I have the first dance?”
He was thinking about the fact that before long she might be married; his little sister, all grown up and a woman. This might be his last chance to share a childish dance, brother and sister together, as they did when she was younger.
Patience smiled at him. Perhaps she saw the ending of an era, too; perhaps she was simply young enough that the idea delighted her still.
“Of course, brother mine,” she replied, echoing his words teasingly.
Chapter 23
She was whirling around the floor, dipping around the other couples in the intricate steps of the dance, landing her always opposite John Woode.
It was not that she had the most pleasing of partners; yet still, she could appreciate the dance, which was one of her favorites.
Juliana’s heart almost stopped when she looked up and saw him, resplendent in a freshly washed and pressed red uniform, looking every inch the dashing officer. She could not believe her eyes for a long moment.
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The dance took her away, her back to him, for a few steps; but as soon as she was able to see again, her head whipped round to find him.
It really was him – it was Christopher! She had not even thought him back in this area of the country, and here he was!
But who was the girl that he danced with?
Juliana’s heart was in her mouth as she glimpsed a head of glorious hair, which shone in the candlelight with a healthy gloss.
But then the girl turned as the steps dictated, and Juliana, deliberately hesitating half a step behind, saw her face.
She smiled to herself in giddy relief. The family resemblance was utterly unmistakeable, and besides, Christopher had shown her a collection of miniatures painted of his whole family as a gift for his first day in service.
Juliana admitted that the painted wood had none of the true vitality of the girl, but it was clear that he danced with his sister, Patience Hardwicke.
And hadn’t he mentioned something about the girl courting a Haverham boy, now that she thought of it…?
There had been something to that effect, back before his brother’s marriage, when they had first rekindled their acquaintance after that whole mess with the Lord Drevon.
“What brings a smile to your lips, my lady?” John Woode asked. “Is this a favored dance of yours?”
“It is,” Juliana replied.
She would not give him to believe that it was his presence which made her smile, however, and so she felt it necessary to add.
“I have seen an old friend over yonder, dancing with her brother.”
It was a little lie: she had never met Patience, not in person. But that could be arranged very easily. Should Christopher introduce them, her disguise would be complete.
Christopher was engrossed in his sister, a pretty girl who laughed when she spun in place and almost stumbled.
Juliana privately thought that she was very pretty indeed, and that it was no surprise the son of a house this large would be interested in her, no matter her own status.
He never looked up, though Juliana glanced their way at every opportunity. At long last, the dance came to an end, and John made her a bow.
“I shall leave you to your friends, Lady Juliana,” he said. “I can see that you are eager to go and meet with them.”
There was no reproach in his voice – rather, an edge of hurt and self-pity which struck Juliana to the core.
She felt guilt immediately, but there again, wasn’t it better for him to be discouraged?
“I believe Lady Mary is waiting for you over yonder,” Juliana said, after making the obligatory curtsey. At least that, she hoped, would salve his wounds a little.
As soon as she saw them favorably connected, Juliana made her way across the floor to where Christopher and Patience now stood, conversing quietly at the side of the room.
Lady Easterby apparently had not noticed her charge heading away and was more occupied with the drink she held in her hand than in surveying the room carefully.
It was all the same to her – since it gave her a chance to meet her beloved after all, and John would believe her safely with a female friend!
She was quite breathless by the time she had managed to make her way through the crowd, and caught up to them just as a red-headed young man joined their party to make a third.
“Lady Patience!” Juliana exclaimed quickly, seizing the opportunity before the girl could be whisked away by the man who had clearly come to ask for her next dance.
“It is such a long time since we met. Are you well? Won’t you introduce me to these gentlemen?”
Patience gave her a wild look, and Juliana could not blame the girl. She only hoped that she would be sharp enough to catch on.
“This… this is my brother, Lieutenant Christopher Hardwicke,” Patience fumbled.
She looked up at Christopher as she introduced him, and from his expression, she must have deduced all she needed to know.
“Christopher, this is a friend of mine, Lady Juliana…”
There was an awkward pause, in which Patience clearly fought to remember Juliana’s family name and failed.
“Reffern,” Juliana supplied, her smile unfaltering. She dipped into a curtsey. “Pleased to make your acquaintance, Lieutenant.”
“And this is Lord Edward Haverham,” Patience finished.
“Charmed, my lord, your family has a beautiful home,” Juliana said politely. “I ought to thank you, both for the ball itself and for the invitation. It is shaping up to be a fabulous night.”
“Thank you, Lady Juliana,” Edward Haverham dipped his red hair in polite courtesy. “Lady Patience, I had thought to ask for the next dance. But if it will leave your friend quite alone…”
“She will not be alone,” Christopher said gallantly. “I, too, will offer this dance. Does that suit you, Lady Juliana?”
“Quite so,” Juliana smiled, inclining her head slightly. “We shall reconvene later in the night for our regular gossip, Lady Patience!”
With a murmured assent, the girl was gone, pausing only to throw one more baffled look over her shoulder at Juliana’s conduct.
Christopher led her to a position where they might join the dancers lining up already, and gave her a raised eyebrow himself.
“What possible reason for this subterfuge?” he asked, quietly enough that only she could hear.
“I had to escape my chaperone somehow,” Juliana said, her lips quirking.
“I told cousin John that I had seen an old friend, and he was not concerned that I should go and speak with another young lady. Should anyone make inquiries, our introductions are now complete.”
“You are becoming adept at deceit,” Christopher said, meeting her eyes with an amused look. “Should I be concerned?”
“For yourself, never,” Juliana assured him, hearing the first strains of the music and taking the correct position.
The dance, the music, the other revelers about them; none of it made any impression. All of the rest faded away, leaving Juliana alone absorbed in Christopher entirely.
It was such exquisitely torturous pleasure, to dance like this. The movements had them swaying, slipping around one another, moving closer and further away, but never once touching.
At that moment, Juliana could say without a moment of hesitation that the one thing she wished for in all the world was that touch.
She could not take her eyes away from his, nor could he remove his gaze from hers. There were so many sentiments she wished to express, so many sighs of longing and joy and contentment that threatened to spill from her.
Still, she restrained herself. She was aware of their setting, even if it made not much mark on her.
There was what she wished, and then there was what was allowed. The two were sadly unconnected.
“Have you plans for the summer, Lady Juliana?” Christopher asked.
To any other, it would sound as though he were making the kind of polite conversation one expected at a ball. She knew he was asking when they might meet again.
“I am to stay with the Lady Ascot and her family for the time being,” she said.
“I am with my dear friend, Lady Mary Westenholme. In a few weeks, I suppose I shall return to my family’s estate. There are plenty of balls and picnics to look forward to as the summer takes hold.”
“I see,” Christopher nodded, digesting this information.
“And yourself?” Juliana asked.
“For my part, I shall spend most of the season improving my prospects,” Christopher said. He shot her an apologetic, crestfallen glance. “I had hoped to become a Captain by this time, but…”
Juliana nodded quickly, casting her eyes to the ground so that she could regain her composure.
It was a sad thing to hear; she had hoped he would have news of a definite plan, or some promised promotion, so that she could know when they might be joined in earnest.
There was something more behind his eyes, a story that he could not t
ell her. She could see it. It was so restrictive, trying to converse in the midst of the ball like this!
How could he tell her the full truth, when there were ears on every side that might report their conversation elsewhere?
“You are enjoying your time with Lord Ascot?” Christopher asked, nodding towards John at the other end of the room, where he danced with Mary.
“The Woodes have been completely hospitable,” Juliana said.
