She shrugged. “It was a miracle.”
“And there was a sky above the building where the baby was born? A star cannot come that close to any planet. Stars cannot move that way.”
Kepi’s frown deepened, and to Carolyn, he looked so funny that she had to fight to keep from laughing.
“It was probably an allegory,” she told them. “Chances are the whole thing is mythological.”
Sipu looked at his partner, then back at her. “Um....”
Kepi shook his head. “It makes no sense.”
“Um…” Sipu said.
Carolyn looked at him. “What’s the matter?”
“How long ago was this?”
She thought. “I don’t know the exact year, but, like, two thousand and fifty years or so ago?”
He covered his mouth with this hand, then asked, “What time of year did this happen?”
“Oh! Some people say it was July, but the holiday is in December. December 25th, to be exact. Three days from today. We’re performing on Christmas Eve.”
“I think…” He lowered his hand. “I think that wasn’t a star.”
“Well, of course it wasn’t a star,” his partner chided. “A celestial body of that magnitude entering a planetary atmosphere would…”
Sipu turned to Carolyn apologetically. “I think that was us.”
Chapter 3
She gaped.
“The Star of Bethlehem? It was you?”
Sipu nodded. “I’m afraid it may have been. I hope that doesn’t disturb your adherence to your belief system.”
“I.. no. But.. how?”
She realized that she was sputtering like an idiot, but the aliens didn’t seem to mind. Kepi looked almost as confused as she was. Sipu just looked embarrassed.
“Well… two thousand and fifty Earth years ago, more or less, I was on my first mission to this planet. We noticed an unusual electromagnetic pulse in a desert quite distant from the location where we found you.” He glanced at Kepi, then continued. “We hovered over the source of the EMP but couldn’t identify its origin. We did test after test, and stayed for quite a while before we finally left. In fact, we stayed for so long that we missed our window in the wormhole and had to spend a year exploring this part of the galaxy.”
Kepi nodded and muttered in their language. Sipu’s response was an abashed shrug of one shoulder.
“Wow,” Carolyn said, putting a hand to her forehead. “That’s… that’s incredible. That certainly puts a whole new spin on things.”
“Does that ruin your holiday?” Kepi asked, concerned. “I’m sorry if my partner has just destroyed your enjoyment.”
“No, no… there’s more to Christmas than the religious aspect.”
“Like the lights?” Sipu asked eagerly. “Every year at this time, many humans put out brilliant displays of lights. It took us a long time to realize that they weren’t trying to signal to us.”
Kepi smiled. “It drove some linguists nearly mad trying to determine what was being said.”
Carolyn laughed at the thought. “No, those are just for brightness and happiness. We love to decorate for Christmas, the brighter the better. Other than the religious stuff, there’s Santa Claus and reindeer and gift giving and carols…” She sighed. “It’s just a really magical time of year.”
“Santa Claus,” Kepi said, nodding sagely. “Yes. We have heard of him. He has a low-atmosphere craft with ovine propulsion.”
“A what with a what?” She laughed. “A sleigh that’s pulled by flying reindeer. That’s what the story is, but it’s just a silly thing, like the tooth fairy. It’s a tale we tell our kids to make things more special.”
“Tooth fairy?” Sipu asked. “What is that?”
Carolyn chuckled. “Humans have two sets of teeth. One is for when we’re children, and when we get older, our permanent teeth come in. That means that kids lose their baby teeth, and it’s a rite of passage toward growing up. When they lose a tooth, we have them leave it out when they go to bed. Then we take it, replace it with money or a little gift or something, and tell them that the tooth fairy came.” She saw the uncomprehending looks on their faces and added, “A fairy is a mythological creature that looks like a tiny human with wings. They’re magic, and the tooth fairy takes children’s teeth.”
Sipu looked horrified. “But… why? What does the fairy do with the teeth?”
She paused. “I’ve never really thought about that. I don’t know.”
“Millions of teeth every year are taken by this tooth fairy, and they must be taken somewhere... What a horrible story to tell young humans!”
Kepi put a hand on his partner’s shoulder. “It’s a myth, like your Christmas story, correct? Not something that’s meant to stand up to deep contemplation.”
“Well… there are some people who see all kinds of meaning in all of this, and to a lot of people, the Christmas story isn’t mythological at all.”
“And where do you stand on that subject?” Kepi asked. “Do you believe it really happened?”
She considered the question. “Well… I believe in God, and I want the story to be real. I know that our re-enactment of it is going to be very real. We even have sheep that will be on the stage with us.”
“Your pageant.”
“Yes.” She smiled. “I’m going to be playing the Virgin Mary. Other than the angel, it’s pretty much the only part for a woman, unless you sneak one in with the shepherds.”
Kepi sat back. “Are you very eager to perform in this pageant?”
“Very,” she said. “For years, I’ve been in the choir, just singing the songs while other people got to do the acting. This is the first time I’ve been able to be Mary. It’s a big honor.”
“Ah. Congratulations, then.”
“Thank you.” A crazy idea occurred to her, and she decided just to go with it. “Would you guys like to come and see the show?”
They looked at one another in surprise. Kepi turned back to her. “You mean your pageant? To attend as an audience member?”
“Yes. Actually, come back with me tonight. I’ll show you Christmas, and then we can leave in time to hit the wormhole. What do you say?”
“Uh…”
Kepi frowned again. “I don’t know.”
“Come on. You’re asking me to go to your homeworld and leave everything I know behind. You guys should risk a little something, too.” She crossed her arms and sat back. “Unless you’re too afraid, that is.”
Kepi and Sipu turned to one another and engaged in a lengthy, animated discussion. Finally Kepi tapped his fingers on the crystals before him. Sipu stood.
“We accept your invitation, Carolyn Walker.” He offered her his hand. “As humans do, shall we ‘shake on it?’”
She shook his hand firmly. His skin was warm and smooth, feeling almost like glass. She would have expected it to feel like metal, given its coppery gleaming. He looked at her hand as if he wasn’t quite expecting what he was feeling, either. She wondered what he thought of her touch.
The handshake turned into a hand hold, and Kepi cleared his throat. He stood and smoothed down the front of his black jumpsuit, even though there were no wrinkles to be seen.
“Let us return to your vehicle,” he said. “May we accompany you to your dwelling?”
She grinned. “Of course.”
Kepi sent the crystals back into the table, and the screen that had separated them from the rest of the interview tables vanished. She grabbed her telescope and purse, eager for the adventure ahead. They led her back out of the large room they were in, pausing to speak to another alien on the way out. This alien appeared to be male, as well, and like Sipu he had a coppery tone to his skin. His hair wasn’t gold like Sipu’s; rather, it looked like bronze. He spoke with obvious concern, frowning and gesticulating. She assumed they were telling a compatriot where they were going, and that alien was doing his best to talk them out of the trip. Sipu and Kepi held their ground, and the other alien abandon
ed the conversation with a sour expression and a wave of his hand.
Sipu turned toward her with a smile. “Well. Let’s go back, shall we?”
They walked back toward the hangar where the saucer waited. Once they were back inside the smaller craft and Kepi busied himself with piloting out of the mothership, Carolyn turned to Sipu.
“So… have you ever done anything like this before?”
He shook his head. “No. Never.”
She chuckled. “Me, neither.”
They returned to the country road where she’d left her car, and they landed their saucer in the fallow field. Kepi pressed his palm against the fuselage when he left the craft, and with a shimmer of light, it vanished from view.
“Nice trick,” she said, impressed.
“It’s light bending,” Sipu said. “It’s simple technology.”
“Not for us.” She fished her key fob out of her purse and popped open the doors on the car. “Come on. Let’s go to my place.”
While she stowed her telescope in the trunk, the two aliens watched as she opened the car door, and after a moment, they managed to get inside. Sipu’s efforts to get into the back seat were awkward and honestly adorable, and Carolyn felt a little bad. He was a large person, and he ended up sitting sideways. She started the car, and off they drove.
They arrived at her house a little after midnight. Her multi-colored Christmas lights hung from the eaves, twinkling brightly, and strings of popcorn and cranberries adorned the snow-capped bushes outside her door. She parked and got out, taking her telescope out of the trunk. Kepi and Sipu stood and looked at the house, their skin reflecting the flashing colors. They looked strange and beautiful at the same time.
“This is your dwelling?” Kepi asked.
“Yeah. It’s little, but it’s mine.” She opened the front door. “Come on in.”
She normally felt a little embarrassed when new people came to her house, since it was only 950 square feet in total, with cramped little rooms and not much in the way of furniture. These visitors likely wouldn’t have the same standards of comparison to use when judging her, which made her feel vastly more comfortable. Since even the most opulent McMansion would be primitive to their eyes, her little house wasn’t looking so bad.
Carolyn turned on the lights, then plugged in the Christmas tree. Tiny bulbs of red and green began to shine amid the plastic needles, their colors reflected back by the silver ornaments and tinsel on the tree. On the top, her angel stared down with a placid smile not unlike the ones that the aliens constantly wore.
Kepi stood back and looked at the tree, his hands on his hips. “Impressive. A tree that grows without sunlight.”
“The tree is artificial,” Sipu pointed out. He turned to Carolyn. “Why do you have an artificial tree in your home?”
“Because real trees drop needles everywhere, and they only last one season. Artificial trees can last for years, and they don’t need to be watered.”
“But… why a tree in your dwelling?”
She hesitated. She’d honestly never considered it. “I don’t know. It’s just a Christmas tradition. I think it’s supposed to symbolize life in the heart of winter, since pine trees - which this one is supposed to be - are called evergreens. They never lose their leaves or needles during the cold, at least when they’re alive.”
The aliens looked at one another, clearly perplexed. Sipu apparently didn’t find her answer sufficiently edifying. “But… why?”
“I don’t know,” she shrugged. “Evergreen, always alive… like how the Christ child brought humanity eternal life…”
“Humans are immortal?” Kepi gasped.
She laughed. “No! The thought is that once we die, we go to Heaven, where we live forever in a spiritual sense. Our souls, the spirits inside us, never die, and according to my religion, that’s because Jesus was born on Christmas.”
Sipu nodded. “Ah. Conservation of energy. That makes sense.”
“No. It doesn’t.” Kepi frowned. “What is Heaven? How can you live after you die? It’s illogical.”
“Well… yeah, I guess so.”
She looked around for something that could help her explain holiday traditions. She considered the little china figurines that made up her Nativity scene, and the books she’d purchased about how to make Christmas ornaments out of papier-mache. None of that would help, especially not the book, since she was pretty certain neither of these aliens could read English.
Her gaze fell on her TV remote, and inspiration struck. She grabbed it and turned on the Hallmark Channel, which was running its end-to-end Christmas movie marathon. The aliens stood and looked at the TV.
“Here, sit here on the couch,” she invited. “Watch these. They might help you understand.”
Kepi and Sipu sat on the couch shoulder to shoulder, and together they were almost too broad for the furniture. She was struck again by how beautiful they were in all their metallic glory, but now she thought they looked pretty sexy, too.
“Hey, can you guys eat human food? Drink human drinks?”
Kepi nodded. “We have similar gustatory senses.”
Sipu smiled. “I like human food.”
“Perfect.” She handed Kepi the remote. “Watch TV while I get busy.”
Chapter 4
An hour later, Carolyn returned to the living room with fresh Christmas cookies and homemade eggnog. A TV tray between the two aliens held the treats, and she sat down in her armchair with her own plate.
“What is this?” Kepi asked.
“Traditional Christmas food,” she said. “Sugar cookies with icing and sprinkles, and eggnog, which is a drink made with eggs, cream, sugar and vanilla.”
On the screen, the actor and actress were in one another’s arms, their lips locked in a passionate embrace. Kepi stared at the image with an open mouth, his eyes wide.
“What are they doing?” he asked, sounding intrigued and horrified at the same time. “Is he eating her?”
Carolyn laughed. “No! They’re kissing.”
The aliens looked at one another, then at her. Sipu took one of the cookies and examined it as Kepi asked, “What is kissing?”
“It’s a way that people show affection,” she said. “There are different kinds of kisses. That one that was just on TV is a sexual kiss. That usually leads to… see? A bedroom scene. That kind of kiss often leads to sexual intercourse.”
“Sexual… intercourse?”
Sipu took a tentative nibble of the cookie. His eyebrows rose. “It’s very sweet!”
“Yes, it is.” She smiled. “Do you like it?”
“It’s… sweet.”
“Uh-huh… But do you like it?”
He looked up at her with a wide grin. “It’s delightful.”
“I’m so glad you’re enjoying it.”
Kepi watched the simulated romance on the screen, a scene that was actually pretty chaste as such things went. Carolyn thought she should turn on Netflix and find an NC-17 movie to really blow his mind. When the scene was over, Kepi shook his head.
“Sexual intercouse.”
“Well, how do your people reproduce?”
He looked embarrassed. “It’s a scientific process. Genetic material from a mating pair is combined in a laboratory and allowed to develop.”
She shook her head. “So you don’t have, you know, relations?”
“It was determined that sexual intercourse and pregnancy were activities that were too dangerous to be continued,” Kepi told her. “Also, the process is… impolite.”
Carolyn laughed. “Only if you do it right. Seriously? You don’t have sex, ever?”
“Seriously,” Sipu nodded.
“How long has that been the case?”
They had a brief discussion in their language, then Kepi answered. “Several thousand years.”
“Wow.” She sipped her eggnog. “You guys are missing out.”
“I can’t imagine what we would be missing.”
“All t
he fun, for one thing. And for the females, you lose the experience of actually bringing a new life into the world.”
“That’s painful and destructive,” Kepi objected. “The females’ bones are diminished as the fetus leeches calcium. Her tissues are strained, and her hormonal harmony is disrupted.”
“Hormonal harmony?” she smiled. “I’ve never heard of such a thing.”
Sipu looked at her closely. “Have you… kissed?”
“Of course. Like I said, there are all kinds of kisses. There’s a kiss you have with your family, and a kiss you have with friends, and kisses for babies, and kisses for pets…”
“But.. have you kissed in a sexual way?”
She smiled, although her cheeks burned. “Yes. I have.”
Kepi took up the invasive interview. “And have you had sexual intercourse?”
“I… Yeah, I have, but it’s been a long time.” She cleared her throat. “Do you have marriage where you come from? Or romance? Dating? Mated pairs?”
They looked at one another, then Sipu said, “We have mission partners, friends and companions.”
“And when you decide to make a baby in the lab, how do you select a breeding partner?”
“There are lists made. When our names are reached, we’re called into the medical center, where we allow the doctors to take a cheek swab. Then the genetic material is matched with someone who is not a near genetic relative, and another Liktan is created.”
“Liktan. Is that what your race is called?”
Sipu nodded. “Our planet is Likta. Our race is also Liktan.”
“So you don’t even provide sperm, or eggs? It’s all cheek swabs?”
Kepi looked appalled. “We...No!”
“That’s a damned shame.”
They looked at one another, and the metallic skin of their cheeks began to look slightly more burnished. Kepi was the one who spoke. “Why would you say that?”
“Because you’re missing out on a lot of pleasure.” She tilted her head as the credits rolled on the Christmas movie on the screen. “Don’t you want to have physical pleasure?”
Sipu held up the cookie. “This is physical pleasure.”
A Very Alien Christmas: A Limited Edition Collection of Holiday Alien Romance Page 15
