by Brent, Cora
“I already promised Dee that I’d work. We’re only open for six hours though. I can come over after.”
“Good.” I kiss his lips. “Let’s go inside. It’s cold out here.”
“Wait.” Ben pulls me back and produces a silver wrapped box from his pocket. “I want you to open your present first.”
At heart I’m still a kid who loves receiving a gift, any gift, and I unwrap the box with eagerness. Then I just stare at the object within.
Ben mistakes my silence for confusion. “It’s a fountain pen.”
“I know. I’ve always wanted one.”
“Your initials are engraved on the side. You always seem to prefer the old school way of jotting thoughts down in your notebook so I thought you should have something special to use.”
This boy. He gets me.
“Thank you, Ben. I love it.”
And I’m also feeling a little inadequate now because his gift doesn’t seem nearly as thoughtful. I bought him a couple of warm hooded sweatshirts because that’s his wardrobe of choice when he’s not in school clothes.
I throw my arms around him and we spend a long moment just holding each other.
He keeps his arms around my waist but lifts his head so he can peer down at me. “For years I couldn’t stand the holidays.”
“I didn’t know that.”
“Doesn’t matter. It’s not the case this year. You know why?”
“Tell me.”
“Because of you.” He kisses my forehead. “You make me remember how to be happy, Camden.”
It’s a very sweet and very sad thing to say. My heart leaps at the same time that it breaks. Terrible things have happened to Ben, things that are so awful he can’t even talk about them. And I can’t really help him with that. All I can do is hold him tightly and give him all the love in my heart.
I take his hand and hold it to my chest so he can feel the rapid beat within.
“Merry Christmas, Ben.”
Then I open the door and lead him inside, where my family is waiting to celebrate the holiday with us.
Ben
We are all over each other from the second I turn the key in the lock to the side door.
After taking my girl out for a New Year’s Eve dinner both of us were in a hurry to get back to my place, guaranteed to be empty until after midnight because my mom took off for some party in Black Mountain with some of her waitress pals.
Camden is sucking on my neck and my hand is up her shirt as I wrestle the door open and perform some mental math to calculate how many condoms I have left.
Six. I have at least six. That should be enough. Probably.
We spill into the kitchen and my fingers locate her bra clasp at the same instant her hand lands on my dick.
“Fuck,” I groan as I get her bra open.
“Soon,” she promises as she works my zipper down.
I back her into the fridge and get aggressive, shedding my jacket and my shirt while keeping her pinned there with my knee between her legs. “So you want to get fucked tonight, huh?”
Her eyes dance. “I do want to get fucked. I’ve been looking forward to it all day so you better be ready.”
My hips grind into her. “Doesn’t it feel like I’m ready?”
She rocks with me, her knees hooked on my hips, and lets out the kind of breathy little moan that I love so much. “Feels like it’s a mutual emergency.”
“That it is. First I’m going to shred your panties with my fucking teeth.”
She nips my ear. “Joke’s on you, Ben. I’m not wearing panties.”
That’s it. I lift her and carry her on my shoulder with one hand, making a beeline for my bedroom where I strip her down, discover that she was telling the truth about her panty-free status, and then position her on all fours on the bed.
Camden tosses her hair, looks back over one bare shoulder and surveys me with a raised eyebrow. “I’m warning you, I’m in the mood to be fucked until I scream. So don’t be gentle this time.”
“Jesus,” I mutter.
This girl is a constant shock to me in the best freaking way. She’s sweet and she’s beautiful and she’s wickedly horny. The more we’re together the more creative she gets. For years I thought I was immune to getting knocked on my ass by a girl but Camden Galway has my number. I’d move heaven and earth for her.
Right now I’m happy to meet her demand. I take her hard and rough the first time. Then I hold her close and stroke her skin until I’m ready again and we make love with tender leisure, our mouths fastened together most of the time.
“Ready for a brand new year?” I ask as she snuggles close.
She kisses my chest and gives me a brilliant smile that pulls my heart apart.
My angel.
“I’m ready for a new year with you.”
I play with a section of her hair. “Glad to hear it because I’d be tough to get rid of at this point.”
She bites her lip. “We’re going to shock everyone when school resumes.”
“You mean at Black Mountain? To hell with them.”
“To hell with them,” she agrees and lays her cheek to my heart. “I’m so lucky. I can’t believe I get to celebrate with you like this.”
I kiss the top of her head and feel around on the floor for my jeans. “Stay right here.”
“Where are you going?”
“To get something to help us celebrate.”
I pull my jeans on for the walk out to the kitchen. For weeks there’s been a cheap bottle of wine on the bottom shelf of the fridge. I’m not sure my mother will even realize it’s gone but I know that even if she does she won’t care enough to mention it to me.
We have none of those fancy goblet style glasses and I decide it makes more sense to just drink from the bottle. We won’t be driving. Neither of us has the use of a car tonight. I’m capable of walking Camden home even with a thick buzz on. Usually I’m not an alcohol fan but fuck it. It’s New Year’s Eve. And I’m going to ring in a brand new beginning with my beautiful girlfriend.
Camden laughs when she sees me with the bottle. “Are we getting drunk?”
“If you want.”
“I’ve never been drunk.”
“First time for everything.” I take a long drink from the bottle. I don’t know why people get all excited about wine. All the wine I’ve ever tried tastes like shit. This is no exception.
Camden pauses when I hand the bottle over. She takes a delicate sip and then makes a face. “It’s sour.”
“I think it’s supposed to be. Aging of the grapes or something.” I climb back into bed and fold her into my arms. I drink far more from the bottle than she does and by the time two thirds of it is gone there’s a pleasant warmth spreading in my chest and my head begins to feel a little fuzzy.
There’s still some time before midnight and I don’t have a television on my room so she wants to move to the living room because there’s some New Year’s Eve celebrity show she likes to watch every year. After the wine I’m actually kind of hungry again so I offer to make some scrambled eggs because it’s the only thing I know how to cook and because it’s probably just about the only food we have in the house.
Camden heads to the bathroom to get dressed while I stroll to the living room and switch on the television. We tend to keep the thermostat low to save money and maybe I should be cold in my bare feet and bare chest but the alcohol has the side effect of keeping me warm.
I’ve just found the frying pan when there’s a distinct knock at the door. I cannot even guess who would be stopping by this late in the evening on New Year’s Eve. If I’m about to face the return of Dirtbag then I’ll have no problem sending him back out there sideways no matter how much alcohol I’ve swallowed.
I open the door without looking.
One second later I realize I have made an awful mistake.
Ben
“Bennett.” Grey Drexler, my cousin, says my name with uncertainty. “Damn, you were a kid the las
t time I saw you.”
“And look at you now,” says his twin with a shake of the head. “You’re almost a man.”
I just stand there, struggling to process what the hell I’m looking at.
How much fucking wine did I drink?
Angus doesn’t wait for my mind to catch up with reality. He pushes right past me and stands in the middle of my living room. This lethal bastard who murdered my father is eight feet away and all I can do is stare.
“Look at this place.” He barks out a mean laugh. “This is just sad.”
Grey is still standing at the threshold and he sighs. “Is it okay if I come in, Bennet?”
Angus makes himself at home on the sofa. “He goes by Ben now. Remember?”
This is no dream or drunken hallucination. Angus and Grey Drexler really are here in my house. Grey is heavier and sports a beard. Angus, on the other hand, looks like he spends plenty of time at the gym. He’s looking around with a palpable air of disgust.
I take a step back and Grey enters the room, shutting the door behind him. I wish with all my might to be clear headed but it’s as if pieces of my brain have been temporarily replaced with cotton. My thoughts run together and I can’t quite straighten them out.
“Where’s Aunt Marlia?” Angus asks. He’s propped his foot up on his knee, like he plans to get comfortable and stay awhile. “I was looking forward to surprising her.”
I remain beside the door in my bare feet. Being shoeless feels like a real disadvantage right now. I cross my arms and try to force away the shock of their arrival and the effects of the wine.
“She went out.” I need to breathe. “What the fuck are you both doing here? How the hell did you find us?”
Grey answers. He’s taken a seat beside his brother but he looks more ill at ease. “We’ve always known where you were. Didn’t take long for the investigators to find you even though your mom tried to cover her tracks. I understand how much you both suffered after your father’s death. I guess Marlia felt like a fresh start would help.”
Angus laughs. “Dad always said she was a nutty bitch. He was right. I mean, fuck, look what she did to you, dragging you to this shithole to live among the poors. What’s she trying to do, serve some kind of jacked up penance?”
Grey shoots his brother a look and then explains. “Our dad and Uncle Layton kept an eye on you, Bennet. Sorry, I meant Ben. Despite the fact that Marlia has always been unstable they didn’t want to take a kid away from his mother. And you seemed to be doing all right here. So they figured they’d wait until you graduated from high school and then make you an offer to rejoin the real world.” He sighs and leans forward. “Uncle Layton died of a stroke last year so Dad’s running the show now. And then the other day, right out of the blue, the office gets a call from some guy in Devil Valley. He says he knows you and your mom and that he can tell us where you’re hiding in exchange for ten grand.”
Angus cracks up. “They don’t grow them real smart in this shitty town, do they? He was under the impression that he was the keeper of some great secret. Grey tossed a grand his way just for being industrious. What the hell was his name again?”
“Darren March.” Grey frowns at me. “He a friend of yours?”
“Fuck no.” I find my voice and in spite of the dire situation in front of me I welcome a fresh wave of revulsion for my mother’s ex boyfriend.
Grey nods. “He made some wild claim about your mother being scared to death of our family and being in some kind of witness protection program.”
Angus scowls. “What kind of shit has she been telling you?”
Grey ignores his brother and tries to lighten the mood. “So how have things been going? I’m married now, got a kid on the way. A boy, due next month.”
I can’t think. I need to think and I can’t think.
“Ben?” Camden is fully dressed and stands just inside the living room. She throws a curious glance at the men on the couch and then looks to me for an explanation.
A piercing bolt of alarm slices through my alcohol-addled brain and I’m instantly alert as I realize two things.
The first is that my cousins have no clue that I witnessed my father’s murder. They believe they are in the clear.
The second is that I need to get Camden the hell out of here.
I don’t trust my ability to look my father’s murderer in the eye and play it cool. And so whatever is about to go down, she can’t be part of it. These aren’t a pair of brain deficient punks like the McGill brothers. Angus is a psychopath. Angus calmly held a gun to his uncle’s head and pulled the trigger.
I’m eyeing his coat, trying to guess if he has a gun concealed in its folds. I’m a scrappy fighter and hand to hand I could probably take them on. But I can’t dodge bullets.
And I can’t risk Camden’s safety.
Even more to the point, I have to make them believe that she means nothing to me. Angus wouldn’t hesitate to use her as leverage. I’ll die before I allow that.
I glare at her and utter the cruelest words I can think of. “Thought I told you to get your skinny ass out of here until you can learn how to suck cock properly.”
She just stares at me and says nothing. She’s not even angry or hurt. She’s too damn smart and she’s already figured out that something is wrong.
I narrow my eyes. “What the fuck are you waiting for? Do I need to shove you out the door myself?”
Angus chuckles in the background.
Camden swallows. Her eyes shift to my cousins and then back to me while I silently pray that she understands.
Trust me, baby. Please.
She raises her chin and her expression becomes icy. “Never mind. I got what I came for. You’re not good for much else.”
She puts on a huffy show of grabbing her jacket, calling me an asshole and stalking to the door. She pauses for a split second when she passes me by and our eyes connect. I see that she’s afraid and all I want to do is collect her in my arms and take her far away from these madmen.
I can’t do that.
Because I can’t escape this showdown.
I was a fool to believe that I’d outrun them in the first place. I shouldn’t have tried. I should have ignored my mother’s pleas and followed my conscience as it screamed at me to get justice for my father. For four years this has been eating me alive inside.
“Go find some other dick to play with,” I tell Camden. “Maybe you’ll learn how to do it right.”
She doesn’t say another word before she steps out into the night and slams the door behind her.
Angus claps his hands. “Mad respect, kid. That was brutal.”
Grey continues to look uncomfortable. “Listen, Ben. I’m sorry about surprising you like this. We had year end business in Denver and decided to make this a quick side trip after getting that call. We know you’ve got a few more months left of high school but you are legally an adult now and we wanted to let you know that there’s a place for you if you want to take it now.”
“You mean a place in the Drexler Group.”
“Sure.” Grey finally smiles. “If you’d rather go to college first you can do that but there’s no need. You’ll start small but the doors are all open for you and you’ll be near the top in no time.”
“I’d rather make a living shoveling shit in a hole until I die.”
“Fuck.” Angus shakes his head and stands with a scowl. “I don’t care what Dad said. If the kid’s happy living in filth and fucking with low class sluts then let him stay here.” He fixes the collar of his overcoat and gives me a cool nod. “You always were a stupid little shit but if you ever wise up I guess we can let you fetch coffee for minimum wage.”
The wisest move would be to keep my wits and avoid playing my hand too early.
Instead I exhale and tense my muscles. “You depraved son of a bitch. Did you look him in the eye before you pulled the trigger?”
Grey is still on the sofa and he’s confused. “What?”
; But Angus knows exactly what I mean. The cruel glint in his eye is replaced with panic. It fades in a flash, traded for the cunning anger I remember seeing in him as a child when he liked to execute seagulls and torture cats. He’s far more dangerous now.
“Your fucking crazy mother told you that.”
I shake my head. “You’ve got it wrong, Angus. I’m the one who told her that.”
“Ben.” Grey is standing now but gives his brother a frustrated look before turning to me. “It’s been a long time since we’ve seen you. It’s pretty clear someone’s been filling your head with a lot of lies and-“
“FUCK THAT AND FUCK YOU!”
Grey holds out his hands, a nonthreatening gesture that begs for calm. A movie screen of old memories flashes through my mind; Grey and Angus, always together, a matched set since birth. They were not identical and telling them apart was easy. Angus was always bigger, always stronger. Angus was widely acknowledged to be the smarter and better looking of the two and when carrying out whatever misdeeds the twins cooked up, Angus was always the leader. The instigator. It was Angus who held a gun while my father pleaded for his life as the other Drexler men looked on.
Except for Grey.
I never saw Grey there that night.
There’s a long shot possibility that Grey might not even know.
Grey still stands beside the couch but Angus has taken a handful of critical steps to his right, effectively cutting me off from the front door. If I were easily frightened then his calculating stare might make my stomach drop. But I’ve already seen the worst he can do and I’m not going to run and hide this time.
I turn my attention to Grey. “My father didn’t commit suicide. They killed him. Your brother, your father, and Uncle Layton.”
Grey’s expression changes to pity. “Ben, I know it’s difficult to accept what your father did but-”
“It has something to do with the Marshlands and those activists who disappeared. He used to cry about it. I heard him. He was planning to go public with what he knew.”
Angus explodes with laughter. “Bat shit crazy just like his mother.”
