CHAPTER XIV.
"And how the knight, with tender fire, To paint his faithful passion strove." _Lay of the Last Minstrel._
"Fare thee well! thus disunited, Torn from every nearer tie, Seared in heart, and lone, and blighted, More than this I scarce can die."--_Byron._
On the afternoon following her arrival at home, Ellen Ravensworth wassitting alone in her drawing-room, when Lord Wentworth was announced. Ashe entered, unable to restrain her natural and full feelings, the younggirl flew to meet him, as though she welcomed a brother.
"How glad I am to see you looking so well, and so like yourself, Ellen!"said the Earl, as he took both her hands in his own; "come let me lookat you, little unbeliever! I could not have told you had been ill! Andhow came you to doubt my pledge, Ellen, or think my ring spokefalsehood?"
As he spoke the Earl still held her hands, and the lovers gazed on eachother with an expression of unspeakable delight.
"Oh welcome, welcome, Lord Wentworth! How happy I am to meet you again.Come, sit down by me on the sofa. I have so much to tell you."
"First answer my question," said the Earl, as he seated himself besideher; "tell me, Ellen, how came you to doubt my ring,--how to doubt apeer's word?"
"Oh ask me not," said Ellen, smiling; "I cannot tell why. I know not howI could doubt you one moment; but it is past now, and you forgive me;see, I wear your ring on my hand still!"
"Forgive you, dearest! nay, I should ask your forgiveness,--at least youhave proved yourself a dear, faithful girl. Ah! Ellen, you little knowhow pained I was to hear you were so ill, and then I did not know thecause. Oh! that I could find the author of that villainous paragraph!How you must have suffered!"
"I forget it all now,--it has passed away like a cloud; and this meetingseems all the brighter for it, as summer seems all the brighter whencontrasted with the wintry snows."
"Yet those snows are sacred to me, Ellen. Do you forget that it was onthe snows our love was born: may it resemble them in purity, and not,like them, fade away in summer's sunshine."
"It will not fade,--it cannot; and oh! how shall I ever pay the debt ofgratitude to dear Lady Arranmore? I love her as a sister; it was owingto her that all this happiness was mine."
"She deserves your love, Ellen; and I hope you will shortly see heragain. Edith and the Marquis join us at the Towers on the day afterto-morrow; we have quite a gay assembly there; and I was almostforgetting my chief object in calling here to-day,--which was to ask youall out next week to join our party. I shall take no refusal, Ellen; sotell that to your father when you give him this note," said the Earl,handing her an invitation.
"How kind of you! the country must be looking so pretty now,--the Towersmust be in all their beauty."
"They are. After all, no place like home,--when the weather is aspropitious as it has been this season,--an important item in thisclimate. I hear you had charming weather for your tour, and enjoyed itmuch."
"Oh, lovely! I do not think I saw a cloud hardly the whole time. TheAlps were splendid, and we toured the whole of the Oberland; but Leman,blue Lake Leman, is my pet! I shall always look back on the days spentthere as the happiest in my life yet; for it was there I met yoursister, and there----"
Ellen paused, but the Earl finished her sentence--
"There you found I was still true,--is not that it?"
Ellen blushed assent.
"It is curious," she continued: "at first I preferred the desolategrandeur of the Alps,--the brawling torrents, rent rocks, and giantpines; but now I seem to love rather the still lake, the river, thewoodland, and plain."
"I fancy, Ellen, we always like the scenery that corresponds with ourprevailing tone of mind. When we are misanthropic and gloomy, we lovethe dark woods, the gloomy gaps of rivers, the naked rock, and coldavalanche; but when we are happy we turn to sunny plains, and the brightgreenwood,--a double reason why you should bend your steps to theTowers, where all is haymaking, sunshine, and merriment; at least if youare now in a happy state of mind."
"Be sure I shall only be too glad to look on the rustic scenery of theTowers," said Ellen.
"And now tell me, Ellen, all about your travels; I shall be able toenter into it all the better as I know every inch of ground inSwitzerland. You know the Captain, Frank, and I only toured it lastyear. Which did you think the most grand scenery?"
"I think almost the wildest was on the road to Hospenthal; nightovertook us as we were near Pont du Diable. I shall never forget theterrific grandeur of that dark torrent as it thundered below."
"Nor I either," said Lord Wentworth; "for it was on that very road thata most ridiculous _contretemps_ occurred."
"Do let me hear it," said Ellen. "I shall have all the more interestfrom knowing the ground."
"We started, then," said the Earl,[E] "a party of six strong, fromFluellen, after lunching there. I remember it was a fiercely hot day inthe end of August, and the sun shot down on our heads with tropical heatas we drove along the valley. Our party consisted of my two brothers,young Scroop and Musgrave, and a naval officer, Wilson. I hope you willmeet them all next week, and you can ask them if they remember it. Whenwe got near the Devil's Bridge, even some time before it, night came on,and the stars twinkled out one by one; the road also became very steep,and we proposed that some should get out of the carriage and walk.Accordingly Wilson descended, and soon forged ahead, and was lost in thedarkness. He had a bugle, on which he blew hunting blasts, and we heardhim from time to time blowing his horn high above. Meantime Frank andScroop and the Captain also began walking on, and hoped soon to overtakehim. When they had passed the bridge, Scroop began to think it wasrather a dangerous place, and remarked it was imprudent in CaptainWilson, who was our purser, to walk on unarmed. They saw twodangerous-looking fellows creeping up towards them from the river, butit was too dark to recognise who or what they were. They said, '_Bonsoir_,' but received no answer. Suddenly one of the two commencedwalking on fast, as if to catch them up; but, determined they should notbe done, they too quickened their pace. The guide, however, passed them,and two or three whistles were interchanged. They now began to feel surethey were robbers, but being armed, determined to fight if attacked.However they reached the Hospenthal without being called on to defendthemselves, and at once inquired for their friend, whom they felt surethey had not passed, and were not a little alarmed to hear he had notarrived. Meantime Wilson, who had been one of the two dangerous-lookingcustomers, the other being a guide he was speaking to, fell back andrejoined us in the carriage, declaring that neither Scroop nor mybrothers had passed him. We were much alarmed in our turn, fearing theyhad lost their way; and when we found them safe, I shall never forgetthe laugh we had in the hall, nor the way we welcomed each other. The_maitre d'hotel_ was quite furious at the row, as tourists go to bedearly."
"How amusing!" said Ellen. "I shall be sure and ask the Captain aboutit, when I see him."
"Well, I have been telling my tour instead of you; but I shall haveplenty of time to hear all about it when we meet at the Towers,--that isif you can make up your mind to be contented with my company. Do youthink with me you could really own a happy mind?"
"Can you doubt it?--can you then think I could be unhappy, with you sonear me?"
"And how could you doubt me?" said the Earl, rising. "And now, Ellen, Imust say adieu for the present. Don't forget the note, and we shall meetagain next Monday; and ere I go, Ellen dearest, I must claim the firstkiss of affection to seal my promise!"
As Ellen did not resist, the Earl pressed his lips to the fair girl'sbrow, and ere she could at all recover from the giddy state of joy heleft her in, was gone; and the first thing that aroused her from herloving reverie was the sound of his horse's hoofs clattering along thedry road to the Towers, and with a fluttering heart she sat down tore-enact the whole scene, with memory's aid. He had called her hisdearest Ellen; had pledged his love with a sacred kiss; had invited herto his home,--what more did she w
ant? The last shadow of doubt wasdispelled,--she was his love, he was her choice, her own! From thisdelightful occupation she was disturbed, as once on a former occasion,by another visitor, who now stood before her. He had entered theapartment, and advanced almost to where she was sitting, ere sheperceived him. She started up with a faint exclamation, when sherecognised his features, and the words, "Miss Ravensworth!"--"CaptainL'Estrange!" broke from the two old allies who met thus in so singularand unseasonable a way. It was the meeting of two cold waves,--it wasthe chafing of two chill rivers! Ellen blushed crimson as she beheld herold admirer, and thought how often he had stood in that selfsame room inhow different a guise. L'Estrange turned ashy pale as he thought howoften and how differently that young girl had received him in thisidentical place. For some moments they both seemed fixed to the spot,and not a word could either speak. They both felt the constraint of thesituation, and for a while were unable to overcome the _gene_ thatexisted between them. At last Ellen broke the ice of ceremony, andsaid--
"I suppose, Captain L'Estrange, I must be the first to break silence,and ask you to be seated."
As she spoke, she herself resumed her former place on the sofa.L'Estrange drew a chair opposite her, and sat down too. He thought tospeak, but the words choked in his throat, and again silence reigned.Each seemed to avoid the other's eye; and when, by chance, their eyesdid meet,--
"The point of foeman's lance Had given a milder pang."
"May I ask the reason of this interview, which seems so painful to you,Captain L'Estrange?"
"And can you ask, can you not guess, Ellen,--I mean Miss Ravensworth,for such is the name I suppose by which I should now address you? Butyou will pardon me if the old familiar name occasionally escapes me. Canyou not guess the reason? It is as a peacemaker I come then. Oh, MissRavensworth, you cannot think how long it took me to summon resolutionfor this meeting! Oh! I pray Heaven it may not be in vain. I cannot bearto live at enmity with any one, least of all with one I onceloved--still love--so well; and who once avowed her love to me; let usbe friends; let us once more love each other."
"I have no quarrel with you, Captain L'Estrange. I hope I have alwaysbehaved in a friendly manner. I hope always to be your friend," saidEllen, in a cold voice.
"My friend! and nothing more? Can our relationship extend no further?"
For some moments Ellen was silent, and hesitated as to her reply, thenin a calm collected voice she said:
"I am deeply grieved if I vex you, Captain L'Estrange. I will be yourfriend, but ask no more; my acquaintance with you ends with friendship."
"Oh, Ellen, this from you!" exclaimed the unhappy young man. "Have youthen forgotten all? Have you forgotten what you once were to me? are allyour promises forgotten? have you no more than this to say to him whowas once your lover, who is so still? Oh, my lost heart!" And unable tocontrol his feelings he hid his face in his hands.
"I have not forgotten," replied Ellen, in a voice tremulous withemotion, for she deeply felt for the disappointed lover. "I have notforgotten anything, nor have I forgotten how Edward L'Estrange was thefirst to quarrel, and when Ellen Ravensworth withdraws her love, shedoes so never to give it back again."
"Have pity on me. Oh! be as you have been in happier, better days. Iacknowledge my fault--deeply I repent it. Oh, Ellen, Ellen! forgive, andforget."
"I forgive you, and from my heart. I cannot so soon forget. Besides, youask an impossibility; my heart is no longer mine to give, even if Iwished. I am no longer free even though I desired. I will be explicit, Iwill hide nothing. Edward L'Estrange, I love another. I love you not. Iwill be your friend, more I cannot, I will not be."
"Ellen, may you never feel the pangs that now wring my heart; may younever know what it is to be deserted as I am now: yet methinks you knownot him with whom you have trusted your heart; you may repent yourchoice yet."
"I understand you not, Captain L'Estrange."
"Then I will be more concise. Perhaps you are not aware it is said youare not the only lady who holds a place in Lord Wentworth's heart?Perhaps you do not know it is whispered a fairer lady engrosses a largershare of the Earl's love than you do?"
"Captain L'Estrange, I believe it not: I deem the Earl too noble. Ithink too highly of his love to entertain such base thoughts of him."
"You believe it not? What would you then say did I tell you, proudmaiden, I have seen this lady? I know her, have heard her speak of him;I trust you may never have cause to feel bitterly the truth of what Itell you."
"And what proof have I of the ingenuous nature of your story? May I notthink it a lure to work on my jealousy, and gain you back the love ofwhich I judged you unworthy?"
"Miss Ravensworth, you are severe: to prove this is not an idle fiction,but stern truth--sad reality, I will show you the young lady's portrait,the acknowledged mistress of the Earl; and it is said she only became soon a promise of marriage, should there be any liability of its becomingknown."
As he spoke Captain L'Estrange handed an exquisitely painted miniaturelikeness of Juana to Ellen's hands. She glanced on it with an apatheticlook, as if doubtful whether to believe it, or no.
"And what proof have I this lady is Lord Wentworth's choice beyond yourprejudiced word? Do not think me rude, or uncourteous in questioningyour veracity; but I am a lawyer's daughter, and have been accustomed torequire proofs for everything."
"And there then they lie," said L'Estrange, handing her a number ofletters. "Behold my proofs: I am a better lawyer than you took me for:these are letters from the Earl to Juana Ferraras; read them and thenjudge for yourself."
"I forbear to ask you how you gained possession of these letters," saidEllen, as she took them--"certainly never meant for your eye, nor formine either, and I should ill deserve Lord Wentworth's trust could Idemean myself to play the part of a base spy, and peruse them in orderto gain an insight into his private life. To his God he alone stands, orfalls; if he has failings he is but mortal, and fallible as you and I;and with all his errors I love him too well to play the traitor in thecamp. So perish all calumnies on his name!" With these words she threwthem behind the small fire, seldom found too warm in Scotland's earlysummer, and watched them consume away. When they were all reduced toashes, turning round to Captain L'Estrange, who stood in stupidastonishment at another miscarriage in his plans, she said: "If youthink to shake my trust thus you are sadly mistaken: it only proves howlittle you know Ellen Ravensworth; nay, how little you know woman'sheart at all. When she loves, it is not the immaculate being of thepoet's fancy she loves, but man--with all his failings, with all hisfaults. Not an unfallen angel, but man, fallen as he is; and thus,instead of lessening my passion you have but fed it, and fanned theflame. I love him seven-fold more. I do not love the error, but theerring; and perhaps it remains for me to wean his mind from such sordidaffections to the pure fire of hallowed love, to point the way to betterthings; and by God's help I may have the opportunity of so doing,whatever may be our future relations in life."
"Then I am lost; there remains no hope for me," cried L'Estrange, in abitter voice. "Oh, Ellen, Ellen, suffer me so to call you; here on mybended knee behold me; by all our former love, by all that is most pureand holy, return to me again! Restore me to your favour. Let me provemyself still worthy of your esteem, of your love. On this point turnsthe whole course of my future life; on one word hangs my eternal weal orwoe. If you say 'Yes;' if you will restore me to your love--take me,faulty, worthless though I be--you may lead _me_ to better things; guide_me_ to purer founts, and I am happy. But if you say, 'No,' you drive meto desperation; you shut the door of hope in this world and the next;you drive me to drown in the pleasures of sin the bitter remembrances ofparted bliss; you seal my speechless doom, for time and for eternity.Which is it? I wait your answer."
With his hands clasped together in an earnestness of despairing hopebeyond the power almost of fancy to conceive, the unhappy lover knelt atEllen's feet. Calm as the young girl's outward expression was, itneeded no practise
d eye to detect the deep emotions that worked withinher bosom, as she faltered, in a voice scarcely audible, to hersuffering suppliant--
"I am deeply moved for you; I feel for you with all my heart, but Icannot, cannot go beyond what I have already spoken. Seek God'smercy--He will bind your broken heart; you are worthy of better thingsthan you predict for yourself. Edward L'Estrange, it gives me the mostunfeigned pain to be obliged to answer _NO!_"
The last fatal word was uttered with a distinctness awful to theunfortunate listener. For a burning moment he still knelt as though heheard not; he scarce seemed to draw his breath; an air of speechlessanguish clouded his dark eye; and then, as if all at once he realizedhis wayward fate, he smote his hands together, and while the veinsswelled almost to bursting on his brow, exclaimed, in a voice of agonyEllen could never forget:
"Oh God, help me!--I am truly most miserable."
Then, springing up, he rushed from the room without one farewell word.When he was gone, Ellen seemed first to breathe; she buried her face inher hands, and sobs of woe, wrung from a full heart, showed how deeplyshe felt her old lover's misery, and how keenly another's woe touchedher tender spirit.
The Weird of the Wentworths: A Tale of George IV's Time, Vol. 1 Page 14
