Bear’s eyebrows lowered into a look of disinterest, the muscles in his neck straining against the bandana around his throat. “Goblin,” he said, using Little Ricky’s biker name. “Thought I made myself clear.”
“You did, but Caparina, she was like, ‘Nah, Little Ricky, I gotta do this for my family’s honor,’ and who am I to stand in the way of vengeance?”
Bear covered his eyes and shook his head. “Jesus fuckin’ Christ, was there a flashin’ neon sign at the top of the canyon welcoming you? Or maybe you saw the help wanted ad in the newspaper?”
We both stayed quiet, standing shoulder to shoulder, awaiting our lecture.
“No?” Bear asked. “Oh, that’s right. We don’t fuckin’ advertise what we are, and the day we open this club up to women is the day I stop bein’ a biker. We clear?”
Two deep set lines ran vertically between his brows, and I got lost in thought, debating whether or not Botox would correct it. His skin was in need of a good Microderm treatment… or maybe a chemical peel. I glanced up at Little Ricky’s face, pleased with how well his skin was responding to the regimen I had him on.
“Dakota!” Bear snapped. “I asked you a fuckin’ question.”
“Have you ever considered having laser treatments done for the sun damage on your face?” I blurted out.
Little Ricky went stock-still beside me, his face a blank mask as he whispered, “Fuck.”
“Is this a joke?” Bear growled. “You came down here to talk about skincare?”
His voice rose, and I flinched. “I didn’t mean—”
“Look around you, sweetheart. This look like the fuckin’ Clinique counter to you? Now, I don’t know if Goblin put you up to this, or if you’re always this stupid, but there’s only one type of facial being offered around here, and your daddy would have my balls if I let you step one foot inside to see it.” He leaned back against the side of the clubhouse and crossed his arms over his massive chest, clearly waiting for a response.
I knew that the facials he’d mentioned had nothing to do with beauty, but instead of letting my mind venture down that rabbit hole, I pushed the unwanted images away and tried again. “You need me. I know my dad’s alive, and I want to help find him.”
What kind of a man would deny a daughter such a simple request?
“Go home, Dakota,” Bear ground out, the muscle in his jaw popping. “Goblin, she shows up again, and your ass’ll be on the line. We clear?”
Little Ricky nodded, and wrapped his hand around my bicep, leading me back toward his truck.
“Wait!” My throat clogged with tears as I freed myself from his grip. I had one shot. “How can you do this? How can you just pretend like everything’s fine? Why aren’t you looking for him?”
Bear’s eyes narrowed, but he just shook his head before disappearing back inside.
I’d failed.
With Silent Phoenix went my last chance to find my father. Bear hadn’t seen me as an ally, but a nuisance, a pesky bug to be squished under the heel of his boot.
I lowered my head, glancing around the gravel lot to see if anyone else had witnessed my downfall.
It reminded me of my first day of sixth grade, standing in a crowded cafeteria with my tray gripped tightly in my sweaty fists. A few kids had looked up, quickly scanning me from head to toe before going back to their conversations, smirks playing on their lips.
As if I was a joke.
I’d spent my entire life fighting to break away from the chubby girl who just wanted to be included, only to end up right back where I’d started.
I might not have been holding a tray, but I was very much still on the outside looking in. My skin vibrated with humiliation as I imagined the bikers laughing at the idea that I could be useful in finding Grey.
“Don’t waste your breath,” a soft voice said, and we both turned. Lauren sat on the tailgate of a truck, swinging her legs idly.
“Have you been here this whole time?”
She nodded and flipped off the empty doorway with a glare. “Yep. Outshot every single one of the bastards, and he still refused to let me patch in. Told me to go home and get ready for the babies as if that’s all I’m capable of doing.”
I glanced down at my own bump with a solemn nod. “It hurts, doesn’t it? Maybe he’s afraid of the risk. He probably doesn’t understand that we’re women who know how to fight.”
Little Ricky made a noise in the back of his throat that sounded suspiciously like a laugh before looking away.
“I even checked with my obstetrician, and he said it was perfectly safe to go to war with a rival biker gang until the third trimester.”
My lips parted with a soft gasp as I looked up at Lauren in awe.
She’d covered all her bases.
Zane had warned me against doing anything risky when an actual doctor had given her the green light. I smiled, knowing my superhero would have no choice but to let me go after the Sons when presented with solid scientific evidence.
“Dakota,” Lauren said, waving a hand in front of my face.
I blinked, pulled away from my fantasy of winning my first argument against my husband. “Yeah?”
“I’m just fucking with you, but I do have a plan.” She frowned at Little Ricky. “You gonna rat us out?”
He shook his head firmly. “Nah, mi sirenita. You know I could never turn on you. Have you come to your senses and decided you want a real man yet?”
I looked between the two of them, wondering what it was that I’d missed. “Were you—I mean, is there something? I think you’d make a great couple… you know, were you not married to my brother and all.”
Lauren cocked her head to the side. “Do you always talk this much?”
“Absolutely,” Little Ricky interjected with a rough bark of laughter. “Sometimes, I’m like, ‘C’mon, Cap. Give it a rest,’ you know?”
I slugged him in the shoulder and straightened. “I think we’ve gotten off-topic here. It’s clear that Bear isn’t going to let us join their club, so what do we do now?”
Her eyes sparkled mischievously. “Silent Phoenix wants to stick its head in the sand instead of looking into Grey’s disappearance. We can either do what Bear suggested, or…”
“Or what?” I asked, resisting the urge to bounce up and down on the balls of my feet as the popular girl swiped the trays off the table and gestured for me to sit down.
“Or we can assemble our own team,” she finished with a wide grin. “What do you say?”
What did I say?
It was the culmination of every childhood fantasy.
My chance to wear the cape, to be the heroine my father needed.
“I’m in,” I rushed out. “It’s like you read my mind. I’ve got a notebook back at the house with some ideas for what we could call ourselves. The Avengers has already been taken, but what about The Revengers… or the—”
“You know she can’t shoot a gun to save her life, don’t you?” Little Ricky asked, flicking his switchblade open and closed.
“Biscuits and gravy, Little Ricky. You sound just like your dad now, doing everything in your power to keep me out of it. Your face even looks like his.” I used my fingers to manipulate my lips into a sneer similar to the one on his face.
He opened his mouth to argue, but Lauren cut him off. “If you two wouldn’t mind taking a moment to shut the hell up, I’d explain to you that it doesn’t matter. I’ve got a guy that might be able to help.”
“Does Mikey know you’re doing this?” Little Ricky asked, no longer teasing.
Her eyes flashed briefly with pain, and she shook her head. “I’m doing this for him just as much as me. He can’t fight right now. We can either stay in the kitchen, barefoot and pregnant, or we can go down swinging. What’ll it be, Dakota?”
I’d woken up this morning, convinced that no one could understand my need to find Grey. Kate had gone back to her everyday life, and Mama had shut down emotionally.
Lauren got it, though.
She knew that if the Sons weren’t stopped, then we would never truly be safe. We were bringing children into this world. How could we shield them from the ugliness if we refused to take a stand?
‘When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth and tell the whole world--‘No, you move.’’
I’d always imagined myself as Punisher, but maybe Big Guy had seen something in me that I hadn’t been able to see in myself. Captain America refused to back down even when the deck was stacked against him.
He wouldn’t have taken Bear, or Hydra, or anyone else’s words as gospel. I had to do this, not just for my father, but for the baby kicking in my belly and the brother who’d lost his way. I would plant myself like a tree and refuse to bend for anyone.
“Lauren,” I said, sounding stronger than I had in months. “I’m with you… until the end of the line.”
Chapter Six
Celia
3MTA3.
The vanity license plate on the shiny red BMW greeted me as I pulled into my driveway. I stifled a groan before unbuckling, knowing exactly who it belonged to.
The only woman in the world who would think that having the mirror image of ‘eat me’ on her license plate was the epitome of class.
I slammed the car door and stepped over the multitude of vases littering the porch. At some point, I’d given up on taking them all inside, leaving the delicate blooms to battle the freezing temperatures alone.
The inside of the house wasn’t much better.
Almost every available surface was littered with flowers in various states of decay. It had always struck me as odd that we gave living things to commemorate death.
What good were flowers when I’d been given a throne of ebony by the god of death himself?
Initially, Lucy had kept up with the watering and trimming, but even she’d gone back to her normal life, leaving me with an entire greenhouse to manage on my own.
That was what happened, wasn’t it?
After any tragedy, the initial outpouring of love and support was so thick you could cut it with a knife. It was in the weeks and months after that people began to drop off or fade away. The same ones who’d insisted I call them if I needed anything suddenly went out of their way to avoid a conversation with me at the grocery store.
Maybe they would’ve stuck around were my husband actually dead instead of just missing. As it was, every day since the funeral had been spent sifting through the rumors to find a grain of truth.
He’s just hiding out until the dust settles…
You know Jamie, he’s a master of faking his own death…
He’s working with the feds…
I’d heard it all at this point, but I didn’t believe a word of it. They would never come close to scratching the surface of who Jamie Quinn was. I knew his heart and soul as well as my own, and he’d promised me that he wouldn’t leave like before.
The setting sun cast an eerie orange glow over the porch, and I took a deep breath before glancing toward the swing. “Did Bear send you?”
Molly raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow before rocking back. “You know better than that, Celia. When have I ever let that man tell me to do anything?”
I shifted my purse to the other shoulder before leaning against the railing. “Really? I haven’t heard from you in weeks, Molly. Weeks! Look me in the eye and tell me that’s not Bear.”
“Things are…” She sighed. “Things are hard right now—”
“Bullshit,” I snapped. “Hard is being told your husband didn’t make it only to find out later that there was a massive cover-up. Hard is having to watch your kids fall apart all over again at losing him. Hard is knowing that Mikey nearly died from an overdose. I don’t know what you’re talking about, but it’s not hard.”
Molly nodded and dropped her hands down to rest in her lap. “You’re right. I’ve been a shitty friend to you. I just…”
She paused, looking off toward the orchard. “I don’t know what to say. None of it makes any sense, and I didn’t want to push you for answers that you obviously don’t have.”
I gnawed on the inside of my cheek. “If there’s a chance he’s still alive, then I won’t stop searching. I’ll march into the Son’s clubhouse if I have to, but I won’t turn my back and just forget to make your old man happy.”
“You think Bear would be happy with that? He’d been riding with Grey since they were kids, Celia—”
“Then, why is he doing this? Why is he making it seem as if he wanted my husband gone the entire time? Bear was quick to point the finger at Mikey, but the only one who’s benefitted here is him. We know for a fact that Cobra and the Sons are still out there, but the club suddenly wants to stay out of it? Why?”
Molly patted the empty seat beside her, but I remained standing. “Come here, Celia,” she sighed. “Just hear me out, okay? Do you really think that Bear would’ve rolled over on the club—that he would’ve turned his back on Grey?”
“I… I don’t know,” I finally admitted. “Look at it from my angle, Molly. He inherited the club and immediately turned his back on my family as if we’d done something wrong. People we’ve known for years no longer give us the time of day. The girl I’ve been friends with since high school won’t return my calls or texts… how does that look to you?”
Her jaw clenched, but she nodded again. “It looks really fucking guilty. You know how the club operates, though. Women are always the last to know anything—”
I laughed at the lie. “Last to know? Since when Molly? What, did you lose your ‘magical powers’ after Dakota’s wedding?”
“You know that’s not fair,” she said with a small smile. “I’ve only ever been able to get minor details out of Bear… not a step-by-step plan for world domination.”
“Well, don’t leave me hanging. What minor details has he given you that left you feeling confident in the club again? I know you didn’t come here for social reasons.”
Molly ran a hand through her hair and slid her toes along the wooden planks of the porch, pulling the swing from side to side. “Bear is handling things,” she began.
I leveled my index finger at her, just as I had with the girls when they were younger, spinning their webs of lies to avoid getting into trouble. “Don’t. That club isn’t doing one thing to find my husband, so don’t try to convince me otherwise.”
“Bear thinks that Grey worked a deal with the FBI, maybe even the CIA to disappear,” she rushed out with a sigh. “It’s the most plausible explanation for where he is, Celia. Maybe he’s going to take down the Sons from another angle. It’s… it’s genius, really.”
I shook my head, my jaw tightening in anger over the same worn-out excuses that people kept reciting as truth. “No. He left me once before and afterward promised me that he’d never do it again. We almost lost everything because of it, so enlighten me as to why he’d think that leaving us vulnerable for a second time was a lucrative option?”
“I’m not saying we know for sure… it’s just one of the theories the club has—”
“When he faked his death before, every member of that club knew about it. It doesn’t make sense that he’d accidentally forget to clue them in this time, does it?”
Her lips moved into a flat line. “Celia, someone in that clubhouse was giving up intel. Why would Grey announce his plans without knowing who the traitor is? By faking his death, he can observe the club and draw out the rat without anyone growing suspicious.”
It made sense, and I hated her for it.
“But Mikey announced that the casket was empty in front of the club. The traitor has to know—”
“I agree,” she interjected. “But if anything, that should just make them more nervous… more likely to slip up. That’s what we’re counting on. If the rat feels cornered, he’s going to do something stupid, and maybe, it’ll lead us right to the Sons.”
“Why wouldn’t he tel
l me, though?” It was the question that I’d been turning over in my mind, pulling at it like a loose thread in the hopes that it would unravel the mystery.
“Maybe he thought it’d make you a target again. He told you before, and you were tortured for it. He must’ve figured out that the Sons had eyes everywhere and decided to make it as realistic as possible. You had a funeral—”
“What if you’re wrong?” I asked.
“What other explanation is there, Celia?”
I looked down at my shoes, knowing it would’ve been easier to believe that he was dead.
He’d promised me.
“If you’re wrong, then the club is wasting valuable time going in circles when we could be out there searching for him. Did Bear put you up to this? Was this the message he wanted to send?”
Molly shook her head. “There was only one message that Bear had for you. He said to trust him. And that…” She paused as if trying to remember. “The day he takes off his kutte is the day you’ll know he’s surrendering.”
Her words triggered a memory of me in the kitchen with Jamie, eating fried Spam sandwiches, happy for the first time in years.
I know now, and still, I chose to stay. The day I take it off is the day you’ll know I’ve given up on us.
My hand was hidden in the evening shadows, but I could still feel the weight of my wedding band against my finger. I hadn’t taken it off.
I just had to trust that Jamie hadn’t either and that Bear had a plan to keep us all safe.
* * *
We have the girls’ money.
I studied the text from my father, trying to find the catch. It was just a little over two months ago that he was informed it had been stolen in the first place.
There was no way they’d been able to come up with that kind of cash in such a short amount of time, even if they’d taken every last penny from my father’s retirement fund.
“What’s wrong?” Dakota asked, running her fingers over the railing of a crib. Today was supposed to be about her and the baby, not my parents.
Savior: Silent Phoenix MC Series: Book Five Page 8
