I left out the part about Jeremy being naked, with his erection pressed against my thigh, and waited for the laughter… for Nate to tell me that I was overreacting about nothing. Instead, he let out a rough exhale before tightening his hand around mine.
“After a well-placed kick on my part and multiple groaned apologies on his, I drove to my mother’s. I knew Dakota would just grill me for answers before deciding to become Punisher and you…” I paused. “I wasn’t sure what you would do.”
That wasn’t true.
He would’ve left.
“I couldn’t tell my own mother,” I admitted with a bitter laugh as more tears gathered in the corners of my eyes. “I’m a damn therapist, and by the time I pulled up in front of her house, I’d convinced myself that none of it would’ve happened if I hadn’t put myself in that situation in the first place. His actions were so out of character that I blamed myself.”
“Turn the car around,” he said softly, stroking his thumb over my knuckles.
“Nate, I can’t—”
He nodded briskly. “Yeah, you can, babe. Just go back. You don’t even have to get out of the car—”
“Enough. Your hand is in bad enough shape as it is, I don’t even know how you’re going to go to work. Let’s just get you home. Please.”
He let it go, and we drove in silence for a few minutes before he stated, “It wasn’t your fault—”
“Nate, I could’ve called anyone that night… made a better ch—”
“Don’t do it, Kate,” he warned. “Don’t justify his actions. It’s not that fucking hard to keep your goddamn hands to your self. Jesus, I imagine him touching you and—turn the fucking car around!”
I let out a shaky laugh. “He’s not worth it.”
His voice was almost inaudible as he asked, “Were you scared?”
I pressed the garage door opener before answering honestly. “No. I was mad as hell.”
“So am I, Katy girl. So am I,” Nate said with a chuckle before climbing out. “Are you—I mean, if you’re not comfortable—”
“I thought I’d stay, if it’s okay,” I finished for him as I opened the door.
The house looked exactly as it had over a week ago. The small pile of mail that we swore we were going to sort through was still stacked up on the corner of the island. My cardigan lay across one of the dining room chairs, exactly where I’d tossed it before making dinner the night I left. Even the faint scent of balsam from the plug-in I’d gotten on clearance after the holidays still lingered in the air.
My entire life, I’d wanted a place to call my own. I’d longed for the stability of staying in one place.
This place was my home.
Nate stretched his fingers with a wince, pulling me from my reverie and forcing me into action. I grabbed several ice packs from the freezer before leading him over to the couch. “Sit.” I placed one on top of the swollen joints on his hand and settled in at his side to hold the other to his puffy eye. “Let’s see if this helps. I can grab you some ibuprofen—”
“I should’ve told you the truth.” He reached up and tucked a few stray hairs behind my right ear, letting his fingers linger against my throat.
“Nate,” I swallowed. “We don’t have to talk about that.”
“We do. I think we’ve kept enough secrets from each other.” The muscle in his jaw twitched in anger. “Fuck, I wanna drive back over there.”
I let my forehead rest against his collar bone with a groan. “Stop. I meant what I said. He isn’t worth another thought.”
And this time, I believed it.
The fingers on his left hand curled under my chin, lifting my face to meet his. “In the car, you said that I’d been distant. You were right.” A shadow passed over his face. “I fucking threw myself into work to try to lessen the guilt over what happened that night. He was my patient, Katy. Mine. And I fucked it all up—listened to the wrong people. If I would’ve stayed with him, none of us would be in this mess. Jeremy would’ve never gotten anywhere near you—”
“They would’ve found another way, Nate. If it wasn’t you, they would’ve tried to make someone else the fall guy. Just look at the people they have working for them.” I shuddered with the realization that though we’d unmasked one tonight, there were countless others still lurking in the shadows.
“How do we keep getting it all wrong, Katy girl?” Nate hesitated. “With us, I mean. It’s like we’re both still afraid of getting our hands dirty.”
I moved in a little closer, breathing in the familiar scent of him. “I know what you’re saying. I just got so focused on things being perfect out of some fear that I’d end up like my mother. I didn’t want anything to threaten what we had.”
Like Cinderella waking up the morning after the ball to discover her carriage had returned to a pumpkin.
“And now?” His voice was quiet.
“Knowing what I know now?” I propped my elbow up against the back of the couch. “I think I’d consider it the highest compliment to be compared to Celia Quinn. She’s a warrior.”
“She’s a warrior? Babe, I watched you hold a knife on a biker like it was nothing. You looked like, I don’t know, some badass goddess sent to save the entire fucking world. Speaking of bikers, though—”
I sighed. “We’re not going back, Nate. Look, I know you wanted to stay out of this, but my father is still out there—”
“Oh, we’re not backing down now,” he said, staring toward the black screen of the television.
“We’re… we’re not? Why the change?”
He cocked his head to look down at me, knocking the ice pack from his eye onto my lap. “Isn’t it obvious? I told them I’d stay out of it, and they still involved my wife. When it comes to protecting you, Katy girl, there isn’t a fucking thing I wouldn’t do.”
“You’d break the law?” I whispered as I placed it on his face again. “Potentially even risk your job—”
I’d been convinced he’d never do anything to blow up his perfect life…
Nate lifted the pack off his bruised hand and held it up. “This is just a fraction of what I’m willing to do when it comes to you.”
My mouth gaped like a fish as I sagged against him. A slow smile spread across his face as he lowered his head, pressing his lips against my forehead and catching my tears with the pads of his thumbs. “Someone’s gotta take care of you, Katy girl.”
“I thought that’s what I was doing for you,” I said weakly.
Nate’s fat lip looked almost comical when he smirked. “It might surprise you to know, but that wasn’t my first fight. Hell, it wasn’t my tenth fight.” He leaned closer to whisper, “And in medical school, they teach you a thing or two about first aid.”
I pushed against his chest. “You’re making fun of me after I saved your life.”
He nodded. “You damn sure did. The Bonnie to my Clyde—”
“Considering they both died in a shootout with the law…” I shuddered at the image his words conjured up. What if we ended up like that?
Running from the enemy, only to die in a hail of bullets.
As if he was thinking the same thing, Nate flinched and curled his arm around my body possessively, rubbing a trail up and down my spine to ward off the sudden chill.
He cleared his throat. “How about we distract ourselves for a bit?”
Warmth flooded my body, and this time when I shivered, it was from pleasure, not fear. My eyes popped open in surprise. Instead of the feel of Nate’s mouth on mine, I was met with the sound of the television being turned on and the incessant clicks of a man channel surfing.
“Um, babe?” I shifted my focus up to his face and leaned in, letting my lips brush against the stubble on his jawline.
“Yeah?” He flicked a glance in my direction, seemingly unaffected by my advances. His act would’ve been more believable had his dick not been pressed up against my thigh.
“Kiss me.” I was shameless in my begging, but my body was
craving his touch. Maybe it was a normal human reaction to the threat of imminent death. Before, it had been my father’s war or something I’d been mistakenly involved in.
We were in uncharted territory now.
No longer casual observers, but willing participants.
A slow smile lifted the corners of his mouth, but he shook his head. “C’mon, Katy girl. Watch a movie with me.”
In spite of my racing heart, I managed to extricate myself from his embrace and move off the couch. “I said I’d take care of you.”
The ice pack fell from his eye and landed against the cushions again, but Nate made no attempt to reach for it as I began unbuttoning my pants, working them down my hips. I fought against the urge to look away and kept my eyes locked on his as I tossed them aside.
“We don’t…” His throat moved up and down in a swallow. “We don’t have to do this. That’s not what I expected—”
“Nate,” I said as I pulled my blouse over my head and settled across his lap. “You’re not him. So, shut up and kiss me.”
He pulled me down hard into his kiss, tracing the line of my jaw with his thumb while his fingers kept a steady pressure against the back of my neck.
My lips parted to welcome his tongue, leaving me to wonder whether I’d always been addicted to his taste, or if it was a new development, like our decision to go to war.
When he pulled back, I brought my fingers down to his swollen lip with a wince. “Babe.”
“It doesn’t hurt.” He loosened his grip on my neck, dropping his hand to the clasp of my bra. “Is this okay?”
I slipped the straps from my arms and nodded. “Please.”
The bra fell between our bodies before Nate tossed it aside to join the forgotten ice pack. I ground my hips against him when his teeth scraped along my jaw before moving down to my breasts.
His hand moved from the middle of my back down to my ass, squeezing and palming my flesh with enough force to make me moan. He gave me a victorious smirk before lapping at my nipples until they were stiff.
I tugged on the waistband of his jeans, fighting through the haze of lust to find the button. As much as I wanted to lose myself to his touch, a part of me felt like I’d just slept through my alarm.
We were running out of time.
I tugged at his jeans before rocking back onto my heels with a growl of frustration.
Nate patted my thigh with a patient smile. “Move.”
When it became apparent that he wasn’t faring much better without the use of his right hand, I lowered myself to my knees. “I’ve got it.”
With a solid yank, Nate’s t-shirt sailed over my head and landed against the coffee table, and he arched his lower back as I tugged the denim down to join my clothes on the carpet. I shimmied out of my thong, before ultimately losing focus at the sight of his dick curving up toward his abdomen. The tip was already glistening with moisture, filling me with something like pride.
I did that to him.
“No,” he said, pinning my hands between his thighs as I reached for his solid length, imprisoning me with a shake of his head.
“But…” I pushed my tongue out, tracing a line around my top lip as I moved closer.
His hand came to rest against my cheek. “You put your mouth on my cock, and I’m coming down your throat, babe. I want this to be about you.”
I swallowed a moan as his hand threaded through my hair and he tugged, directing me onto his lap again. I rearranged the ice pack against his knuckles before straddling him. “What do you want?”
“To be inside you,” he said, his words barely controlled. “Is that okay?”
My eyebrows drew together in confusion at the repeated request until I realized he was asking for my consent.
As soon as I nodded, his middle finger moved between my legs in slow, deliberate strokes. I lifted my hips to control the speed of his movements, eliciting a low chuckle from his lips.
“So impatient,” he whispered, letting his head fall to my breast, his teeth roughly connecting with the sensitive flesh.
I was, too.
Here, we’d managed to find a sense of calm, but just outside, a storm was raging like we’d never seen before. Our enemy was at the gate, and if we had to come together like savages before going to face them, I’d take it.
I’d take it over not having him again.
“Fuck me, Nate,” I panted, rolling my hips forward in search of him. “Fuck me like you’ll never get another chance to.”
He didn’t question my logic; he didn’t tell me to stop being morbid. Instead, my husband pushed into me with a barely restrained growl. “Good?” He ground out between his teeth once he was fully seated.
I nodded dumbly, no longer capable of complicated things such as consonants and vowels.
He pulled out before thrusting back in slowly, giving my body a chance to accommodate all of him. When I began rocking against him, he pumped his hips faster, forcing me to keep up with the pace he set.
Nothing existed, but us and this stolen moment.
Our bodies quickly settled into a rhythm that left me gasping for air and clawing at the back of the couch.
“Close.” My body tightened around his, and I cried out something unintelligible as his hand clenched my ass, keeping me in place.
Sweat ran from his hairline, but the look of intense concentration on his face remained as if he’d made it his life’s mission to keep me coming on his cock.
“Katy,” he groaned when his thrusts became unsteady. “Where?”
“Come inside of me,” I begged.
Nate jerked his head in a nod. “I’m almost there.”
I squeezed his shoulders in desperation as I rode out my next orgasm, moving only on pure instinct. He thrust one final time, his entire body arching up off the couch as he filled me with a hoarse groan.
I rolled my hips forward, chasing the last of my high before collapsing against his chest in exhaustion. Still, our mouths sought each other out, coming together in a frenzy that surprised even me. We feasted on each other as if it were our last meal before breaking apart with a pant.
“Fucking love you, Katy girl,” he murmured against my hair as my head slipped down to rest under his chin.
“I love you too, Nate.” My hand moved down against his beating heart, and I realized my mother was right. In his arms, I hadn’t thought of Jeremy or that night once.
Nate was my talisman.
Chapter Nineteen
Mike
“Masterson, do you copy?” I repeated the question, slower this time, just in case the big lug hadn’t understood my other fifty requests.
“Maybe they’re hooking up,” Lauren offered with a grin. “Like someone in this vehicle has suggested more than once.”
“Jesus Christ, darlin’. You’re gonna drain me dry. What would that make—the third time today?”
She lifted her shoulder in a shrug. “Fourth, but who’s counting?”
Fuck.
As much as I tried to shut her comment out, my dick nudged against the zipper of my jeans, entirely on board with the idea. He was fully committed to spending his time surveilling the inside of her body.
“Darlin’,” I pleaded. “As soon as this job is over, I am all yours, but right now, I need to set an example.”
She bit her lip with a small grin before reminding me, “You set an example in Celia’s laundry room earlier.”
I tried thinking of historical documentaries… of baseball statistics… anything but the vision of her coming apart on top of the old washing machine.
It had surprised me that with as much money as Grey had, he’d held onto the piece of shit. Right up until it hit the spin cycle, and then it became crystal clear.
“Fuck, Red,” I growled. “You know how uncomfortable this fucking zipper is?”
Her hand snaked across the console. “Here, let me help.”
I caught her wrist and held it while working on getting my breathing and my cock under
control. “Just—”
She nodded and pulled her hand back to rest on top of her belly. “You’re right. Now’s probably not a good time to do that thing I did for you on our porch swing.”
“Fuck me, Lauren,” I groaned, letting my forehead drop down onto the steering wheel. “Not. Helping.”
We could’ve made love twenty times today, and I would’ve been up for it. The only thing that had kept me from moving our party to the back seat was the fact that my former sergeant’s house had remained dark all evening, leaving me with a severe case of déjà vu.
The Sons weren’t known for leaving loose ends, and if they suspected that we’d identified the cop, they wouldn’t hesitate to eliminate him.
Just like they’d done with Detective Rangel.
The only difference between this time and last time was the fact that I wasn’t being backed by a squad of bikers with military backgrounds. And maybe it made me crazy, but I wasn’t too keen on dragging a horny pregnant woman into an active crime scene.
“Sullivan?” I bolted upright as the radio crackled to life.
“Masterson,” I said. “Give me something.”
“We, uh—” His voice cut in and out. “Fuck, there’s no easy way to say this, but our cover was blown.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose with a muttered curse. “Did you happen to get anything we could use?”
“Negative. How’s it going on your end?”
I glanced out the window and back at the house. “Think I might need some backup.”
After giving him my location, I punched the steering wheel. “They’re onto us, Lauren. I feel it. It’s like they’re always one fucking step ahead of us!”
“There has to be a way to outsmart them,” she said. “A way to force them to slip up. I’ve been thinking about it all day, you know? Like, if we just had one ace up our sleeve, it might be enough to bring the entire operation down.”
Savior: Silent Phoenix MC Series: Book Five Page 23
