by Rick R. Reed
“Maybe later. Right now I want to play out this fantasy. Hot guy. Pickup truck. You know the drill.”
“Honestly, I don’t. Not really.” Mike reached over Truman to push open the truck’s passenger door. Cold night air rushed in, an assault, almost like a third presence in the cab, causing goose bumps to rise on both their skins.
Rain pattered against the truck’s interior. Mike shoved Truman, laughing, out of the truck.
Truman watched Mike, his heart rate accelerating, get into position on his back. He drew his legs up near his ears, and Truman regarded his ass with wonder, with lust, with a small sense of ownership. He marveled—even Mike’s ass was crowned with a mat of dark hair. Truman thought he could come just looking at it.
But he didn’t want to come from just looking at it.
He leaned to reach into the glove box, undeterred by the rain sliding down his back, the cold wind blowing. He pulled out another condom, and this one he opened like an accomplished pro. He slid it onto his upward-pointing dick and maneuvered himself into position between Mike’s spread thighs.
Before he plunged in, though, he said, “There’s one more area you asked where we’re headed to, and I wanted to answer that”—he grinned—“before we completely lose our minds. You asked about us—where we’re going.”
And with simply saying those words, Truman’s mind and heart shifted a little. Tears sprung to his eyes. A different kind of warmth seized his heart. A happy future began to take shape in his head, like a flower opening in time-lapse photography. As he looked down at this man-feast laid out before him, he realized Mike was someone he could love, really love—maybe for a very long time. Maybe forever. That his dreams and Mike’s could be compatible. That they could be there for one another, as support and refuge. From the way Mike gazed back at him, with adoration and expectation, he was certain Mike felt the same.
“Us. We’re a thing now. And I hope for a long time.”
“Me too,” Mike said. “You’re my heart.”
“And you’re mine. I love you, Mike.”
“And I love you, Truman Reid. You are a true man.” He smiled. “And you need to fuck me again before I completely go crazy.”
And Truman did.
Epilogue
IN A small house, just above the winding brown snake of the Ohio River, two boys slumber together in a twin bed, arms and legs entwined. Moonlight slips in, slatted and silver, to lie upon the floor and cast the pair in grayish light.
One of the boys—who cares which one—snores softly, a resonant rhythm born of complete exhaustion. The snore accompanies a similar rattling intake and outtake of breath coming from the dog on the floor who lies near the bed, content in the knowledge that his master is deeply happy. The dog dreams of being a puppy again, in filtered sunlight on the pebbled bank of the Ohio River. He chases a stick that dances over the sun-dappled water, and when he catches it, it magically throws itself again. But he never tires, and the joy he knows is boundless. For Odd Thomas, the aches and pains of old age exist no longer.
One of the boys turns, the one with the dark hair and the stubble he’s too young to have on such a baby face, and murmurs in his slumber, perhaps in response to a dream he’s having, one in which he and his own true love, Truman, inhabit a small apartment somewhere vast and bustling. Outside, a cityscape rises up to illuminate the night sky, blotting out the stars, but no matter; the windows of all the skyscrapers are stars themselves. In his dream, he and Truman sleep wrapped in each other’s arms on an old couch, a beaten-up and frayed quilt thrown over their naked bodies.
The other boy dreams too. And perhaps the three of them, together so close in this room, have synced their dream cycles. Truman dreams of a city too, of rows of lighted marquees and crowds emerging under bright lights. He steps backstage after taking his curtain call to fall into the overjoyed and loving embrace of Mike, who is somehow years and years older yet still the same. They look into each other’s eyes, and all the backstage machinery and magic-making, along with dozens of other castmates and crew members, vanish for just a moment as the two hold their gazes steady, knowing that real success lies not in the trappings of what’s around them but what’s in their hearts—and their eyes.
One room over, a woman sleeps fitfully, the smell of white wine perfuming her every exhalation. She doesn’t dream, not anymore. But in those moments when she tosses and turns and her eyes flutter open, she hopes.
In the living room, a young girl with dark hair cocoons herself on the couch, one hand on her belly to perhaps reassure the life growing within her. She dreams of the soft, fat cheeks of a baby, downy to her touch.
IN THE morning Truman jerked awake, staring over at Mike, who still slept, mouth open, a line of drool dribbling out of the corner. “How cute.” Truman rolled his eyes.
He woke Mike with a kiss. When Mike opened those incredible baby blues, Truman forgot for a moment what had panicked him a moment ago—the fear of being caught with a guy in his room by Patsy. He wasn’t quite sure how she’d take it. It was one thing to have Stacy here—who was now couch-surfing in the living room after refusing Patsy’s offer to give up her own bed—quite another to have Mike.
A boy I just had sex with. Four times. A boy, more importantly, with whom I’m falling more deeply in love with every breath I take.
“You need to get out of here,” he whispered in Mike’s ear, much as he hated to say the words. They were still, after all, high school kids. Was this even proper?
“Really?” Mike reached down to give Truman’s dick, at full mast, a playful squeeze. “Maybe one more? For the road?”
“Later, Tiger.” Truman felt even a little more panicked. He’d just heard the toilet flush. What time was it, anyway? The way the sun was shining in, he would guess it was not super early.
A knock at the door made both of them tense. Truman, mouth open, looked wildly to Mike. Perhaps he could slip out the same window he’d come in the night before.
But then they both relaxed as they heard Patsy, laughing, say, “There’s a man in your room. I can smell him.”
More from Rick R. Reed
Teacher Dane Bernard is a gentle giant, loved by all at Summitville High School. He has a beautiful wife, two kids, and an easy rapport with staff and students alike. But Dane has a secret, one he expects to keep hidden for the rest of his life—he’s gay.
But when he loses his wife, Dane finally confronts his attraction to men. And a new teacher, Seth Wolcott, immediately catches his eye. Seth himself is starting over, licking his wounds from a breakup. The last thing Seth wants is another relationship—but when he spies Dane on his first day at Summitville High, his attraction is immediate and electric.
As the two men enter into a dance of discovery and new love, they’re called upon to come to the aid of bullied gay student Truman Reid. Truman is out and proud, which not everyone at his small town high school approves of. As the two men work to help Truman ignore the bullies and love himself without reservation, they all learn life-changing lessons about coming out, coming to terms, acceptance, heartbreak, and falling in love.
A monster moves through the night, hidden by the darkness, taking men, one by one, from Seattle’s gay gathering areas.
Amid an atmosphere of crippling fear, Thad Matthews finds his first true love working in an Italian restaurant called the Blue Moon Café. Sam Lupino is everything Thad has ever hoped for in a man: virile, sexy as hell, kind, and… he can cook!
As their romance heats up, the questions pile up. Who is the killer preying on Seattle’s gay men? What secrets is Sam’s Sicilian family hiding? And more importantly, why do Sam’s unexplained disappearances always coincide with the full moon?
The strength of Thad and Sam’s love will face the ultimate test when horrific revelations come to light beneath the full moon.
When Aaron finds Mavis, an emaciated and shy Boston terrier, at a pet adoption fair, his heart goes out to her—completely.
When Christ
ian, manning the adoption fair for the Humane Society that autumn Saturday, finds Aaron, his heart goes out to him—completely.
This is a story about embracing love, whether it’s for someone who walks on four legs or on two. Mavis’s journey back to wholeness and finding her forever home parallels the story of two men discovering each other at the perfect moment—a moment that defies logic, propriety, and common sense. But when did love ever follow a rational course?
Finding and keeping love can be a challenge in the modern world of blogging, social media, and online dating, as one man will learn in this trilogy.
VGL Male Seeks Same
Poor Ethan Schwartz. At forty-two, he’s alone, his bed is empty, and his HDTV is overworked. He’s tried bars and other places where gay men are supposed to find each other, but it never works out. Maybe he should get a cat?
But his life is about to change…
NEG UB2
Poor Ethan. He’s received the most shocking news a gay man can get—he’s HIV positive. Until today his life was perfect, with a job he loves and Brian, who could be “the one.” The one to complete him and fill his lonely life with laughter, hot sex, and romance.
But Ethan’s in for another shock. Could Brian have infected him?
STATUS UPDATES
Alone again, Ethan wonders if life is worth living, even with a cat. When an old nemesis sends a Facebook friend request, Ethan is suspicious but intrigued. It seems this old acquaintance has turned his life around, and the changes might hold the key to Ethan getting a new lease on life… and love.
Jimmy and Marc make an adorable couple. Jimmy’s kindness and clean-cut cuteness radiate out of him like light. Marc, although a bit older, complements Jimmy with his humor and his openness to love.
But between them, a dark secret lurks, one with the power to destroy.
See, when Marc believes he’s meeting Jimmy for the first time in the diner where he works, he’s wrong.
Marc has no recollection of their original encounter because the wholesome Jimmy of today couldn’t be more different than he was two years ago. Back then, Jimmy sported multiple piercings, long bleached dreadlocks, and facial hair. He was painfully skinny—and a meth addict. The drug transformed him into a different person—a lying, conniving thief who robbed Mark blind during their one-night stand.
Marc doesn’t associate the memory of a hookup gone horribly wrong with this fresh-faced, smiling twentysomething… but Jimmy knows. As they begin a dance of love and attraction, will Jimmy be brave enough to reveal the truth? And if he does, will Marc be able to forgive him? Can he see Jimmy for the man he is now and not the addict he was? The answers will depend on whether true love holds enough light to shine through the darkness of past mistakes.
Readers love the Big Love series by Rick R. Reed
Big Love
“Big Love is a heart warming, heart breaking story about what it means to be gay in modern America.”
—Divine Magazine
“Big Love gets 5+ stars from me.... I could probably write at length about why the book touched me so
deeply, but simply put, Rick R. Reed writes from the heart.”
—Gay Book Reviews
“I really enjoyed this book.”
—Two Chicks Obsessed
“I was blown away by how good this book was and how it truly wound its way around my heart.... This is one of those books you remember years to come.”
—Inked Rainbow Reviews
“Big Love is definitely one of my new all-time favorite books. It’s about love, family, and helping someone who seems unable to help himself. I can’t recommend it enough.”
--On Top Down Under Reviews
Bigger Love
“A tone of authentic tenderness and yearning, completely without artifice, suffuses Reed’s engaging Appalachian tale of high-school gay love. “
— Booklist
Real Men. True Love.
RICK R. REED draws inspiration from the lives of gay men to craft stories that quicken the heartbeat, engage emotions, and keep the pages turning. Although he dabbles in horror, dark suspense, and comedy, his attention always returns to the power of love. He’s the award-winning and bestselling author of more than fifty works of published fiction and is forever at work on yet another book. Lambda Literary has called him: “A writer that doesn’t disappoint…”
Rick lives in Palm Springs, CA with his beloved husband and their Boston terrier.
Website: www.rickrreed.com
Blog: www.rickrreedreality.blogspot.com
By Rick R. Reed
Bashed
Big Love • Bigger Love
Blink
Caregiver
Chaser • Raining Men
The Couple Next Door
A Dangerous Game
Dinner at Fiorello’s
Dinner at Jack’s
Dinner at Home
Dinner at the Blue Moon Café
With Vivien Dean: Family Obligations
Homecoming
Hungry for Love
Husband Hunters
I Heart Boston Terriers
Legally Wed
Lost and Found
M4M
An Open Window
The Perils of Intimacy
Simmer (Dreamspinner Anthology)
Sky Full of Mysteries
Tricks
DREAMSPUN DESIRES
With Vivien Dean: #15 – Stranded with Desire
Published by DREAMSPINNER PRESS
www.dreamspinnerpress.com
Published by
DREAMSPINNER PRESS
5032 Capital Circle SW, Suite 2, PMB# 279, Tallahassee, FL 32305-7886 USA
www.dreamspinnerpress.com
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of author imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Bigger Love
© 2018 Rick R. Reed.
Cover Art
© 2018 Reese Dante.
http://www.reesedante.com
Cover content is for illustrative purposes only and any person depicted on the cover is a model.
All rights reserved. This book is licensed to the original purchaser only. Duplication or distribution via any means is illegal and a violation of international copyright law, subject to criminal prosecution and upon conviction, fines, and/or imprisonment. Any eBook format cannot be legally loaned or given to others. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without the written permission of the Publisher, except where permitted by law. To request permission and all other inquiries, contact Dreamspinner Press, 5032 Capital Circle SW, Suite 2, PMB# 279, Tallahassee, FL 32305-7886, USA, or www.dreamspinnerpress.com.
Digital ISBN: 978-1-64080-621-4
Mass Market Paperback ISBN: 978-1-64108-064-4
Trade Paperback ISBN: 978-1-64080-622-1
Library of Congress Control Number: 2018934235
Digital published November 2018
v. 1.0
Printed in the United States of America
