CHAPTER X
BEGINNING ANEW
Helen went to her room, saying good-night to a group of girls. Shecrossed over to her window and stood there many minutes. Oh, a picturelike this could never be painted. The moon had come up and the tree-topswere clusters of frosted jewels. Such little nooks of almost blackshade, such translucent green where the branches were thin. And themeadows, and the far-off fields, the houses within range! Was she faraway in some unknown region? Was this a book she had been reading andwould she shut it up and find herself in Hope again?
There was such a sweetness and newness and beauty about it all, such aglow in her heart, speeding through every nerve at the wonderfulhappening. This lovely home, these pretty, merry girls, music, books,and a kind of living that filled and satisfied. Six months ago she wasHelen Grant, was she really someone else now? She felt so, as if therehad been some strange metamorphosis.
And that delightful, enchanting week in New York. Oh, how full ofpleasure and happiness the world must be if a few little spaces couldcontain so much! And that she could have a share in the real blessednessof it!
Was that the big clock striking the half hour? One was to stop readingor studying at that warning and prepare for bed. Dreaming too, temptingas the picture was.
Helen had always "said her prayers." A wonder as to the real virtue ofthis had occasionally crossed her mind. So far she had only known areligion of habit; like the other habits of life. To-night a new thoughtpossessed her. Did she owe this simply to Mrs. Van Dorn? If all good andperfect things came from God then this that was so supremely delightful,so almost marvelous of its kind must have been put in the kindly heartby some higher power.
She was curiously awed. Uncle Jason and Aunt Jane were church members,but religion had very little power in their lives. Yet Aunt Jane broughtup her children to be strictly honest, and any bald falsehood she trulybelieved she despised. But injustice or the refusal to see the otherside of the question was not connected in her mind with truthfulness.Like many other people the things she believed in and wanted, wereright, not only for her, but others must be fitted to the measure. SoHelen knew very little of the higher meaning of the word.
Mrs. Van Dorn paid a general outward respect to religion when she waswith a certain kind of people, but she was of a sort of heathen who makegods for themselves. Her life was to be enjoyment now, since the earlypart of it had been hard and comfortless. If it had not been right, aform of reward for those dreary early years it would not have come toher. She thought it bad taste to array herself against beliefs thatpervaded the world so largely. All sorts of disbelief coarsened women.She had listened to one great woman speaker who afterward became anAnarchist, and who even then denounced nearly all the moral precepts andattacked modern marriage, and was really shocked. She liked to keep whatshe called reverence for sacred things. And it pleased her to playProvidence to people now and then, and impress it delicately on therecipients that they need look no farther than herself for the giver oftheir good.
But to-night Helen felt there was some power beyond, and she gave thankssincerely to it. It was God who had made the world so full of beauty, itmust be God who had put these noble and lovely desires in anyone's soul,so she went quite past Mrs. Van Dorn.
There were sweet and merry voices the next morning, but Helen had beenup an hour or more looking over some poems in a choice selection.Someone tapped at her door, and she opened it. Miss Mays stood theresmiling.
"I suppose you feel a little queer, like the traditional cat in astrange garret. Come down with us."
"To-day is a kind of lawless, irresponsible time. I dote on it. We hadlots of fun last year because we came on Friday. It was Daisy Bell'sfirst year, too. You learn to-day what the rules are, but you don't haveto keep them. It's a grace day when you are not forced to get youraccounts straight."
Helen turned and wished her mates goodmorning, and thought withinherself that it was a very pretty thing to say, since the morning was sogood. Yet she had a curious feeling within her, as if she was hereunder some kind of false pretense. She was so utterly honest she wouldhave enjoyed explaining her exact situation, that she was here on thebounty of a friend, and not as these other girls who came fromdelightful homes, and had fathers to care for them.
Mrs. Aldred summoned Helen to her room. Occasionally this was not apleasant call to make, but this morning it had no such signification.
All new pupils underwent this examination. Where she had been trained,what she had studied, and what her aims were, if she had any.
Mrs. Van Dorn had explained pretty clearly, and she had also said,"Don't spoil a very nice, honest girl by setting her up too high."
"What I would like to do most of all?" and Helen's eyes lighted withenthusiasm. "I think it would be to teach, because then you always go onlearning. There are some things that girls and women do that seem tomake you stop off short, turn you into another channel entirely," andshe thought of the shoe factory and how narrowly she had escaped that.
Mrs. Van Dorn had been quite as non-commital with her _protegee_ then,or had no real plans for her.
"Now let me hear what you have studied."
Helen went over the list and told of her High School examination and howshe had passed. There was a girlish pride in it, of course, but no undueelation. Mrs. Aldred was much pleased with the absence ofself-consciousness, the real delight in knowledge.
"You are very well grounded. Mrs. Van Dorn wished you to take up French;of course you will begin with Latin. And music."
"Oh!" Helen's face was radiant then. "Music! I never dreamed of that!"
"You will not enjoy the drudgery, but that has to come first. It is anexcellent thing to be interested in what you are doing, to _love_ it,but all studies are not equally pleasant. There are courage andperseverance needed."
"I shall try to do my very best for Mrs. Van Dorn's sake. It was sogenerous of her to send me here though I do think I should have managedto work my way through the High School."
What a frank, honest girl she was! How little she knew about the world!An astute person could turn her inside out and laugh at her innocence.It was a pity to spoil it, yet it would be worse to leave her at themercy of a crowd of girls.
"This will be an entirely new experience for you," Mrs. Aldred begangently. "You have had very little acquaintance with the real world, andvery little need to be on your guard. As one's sphere grows wider andmore people come into it, there is occasion for"--how should she putit--judgment; no, that was not quite it; at this stage of a girl's lifeshe was not likely to have a very correct judgment; "a little cautionand reserve. Girls so often exchange confidences about their lives andtheir friends, and do not always look at things just as they are.Afterward they regret their unreserve."
Helen had been taking in every word, only she could not get the meaningof it, except that it seemed to her confused sense akin to her thoughtsof an hour ago. She really studied the face before her, and Mrs. Aldredfelt the scrutiny. How could she make the girl understand just what shemeant? If Mrs. Van Dorn had been a little more explicit. If she werehaving the girl educated solely for herself the explanation would beeasy enough.
Helen's directness solved the difficulty. There was so much ingrainedhonesty about her, and yet half the time lately, it seemed to her shehad been on the very verge of deceitfulness.
"Mrs. Aldred," she began, with some hesitation, "I was thinking, thismorning, when I heard the girls talk, that my life had been so differentfrom theirs, and whether I had the right--" her face went scarletthen--"I don't know as I can just explain it," in some confusion, "butwhether I _was_ on an equality with them."
She said it out bravely. Mrs. Aldred admired her courage and herhonesty.
"You certainly are on an equality with them here. If Mrs. Van Dorn hadasked me to take you as a return for some past favors, you would stillhave been put on an equality, and I should not have considered itsailing under false colors. But she pays the usual terms for you, andthe favor is
between yourself and her. So you can dismiss all thoughtsof that from your mind. I think she desires to have you trained insociety ways, which you can do by watching the best examples andfollowing them. You will like some girls very much, and girls arelargely given to think that a true friendship must begin by telling eachother all the little happenings of their lives. It is a good rule toconsider in these matters whether you would like the girl to tell thisover to someone who did not admire you so much, and who repeated it withlittle embellishments to the next eager listener."
"But she could not if it was a confidence," said Helen decisively.
"Girls' consciences are elastic," smiling a little. "I think they do notmean to make mischief, but I have known more than one regret caused byan incautious confidence. Girls have many things to learn before theyare women, but a light and happy heart is the birthright of a girl andshe need not hurry to outgrow it. Still one can study wisdom as well asother lessons, and like most of them, it is a lifelong study."
Helen was considering and wondered if she understood. She had never beencounseled in this spirit. "I want you to know that you are in no sense acharity scholar, as the phrase goes, though I have had several whoworked their way through school, gave for whatever they obtained, whichis far from charity, I take it. I will only add, choose your friends,which implies some discrimination on your part. Did you like the girlsat the table? They are all in the French class and they talk Frenchduring the five school days. That is not demanded of the new scholars.Monday we will begin in regular order and I will have your classesarranged."
Then she touched a pretty bell that stood on the table and Miss Aldredanswered the summons.
"Grace, will you take Miss Grant through the schoolrooms?" she asked,and Miss Aldred smiled as she gave a gesture of assent.
Helen followed her guide. This was the general assembly room, here thedifferent recitation rooms, here the drawing classes met and there werecasts and busts and figures in plaster, and several very well executedpaintings and drawings embellished the walls. Then the music room, andthe study room had a piano in it also.
Helen was a trifle appalled. Education had seemed a rather simple thingat Hope. She sighed as she glanced up at Miss Grace.
"Oh, where is there time to learn it all?" she asked with a sinking atthe heart.
"You do not have to learn it in one day or one week," was the smilinganswer. "And every day it grows easier."
"But--music! I've never even touched a piano."
"Do you sing?"
"Yes, a few little songs and Sunday hymns. And sometimes out of doors Itry to catch the bird notes. They are no special tunes, you know, but Ialways have to stop at the warble," and she laughed brightly.
Miss Grace nodded, rather amused.
"And I have never studied Latin or French."
"Everyone has to begin, though the babies in France talk French, which Ibelieve once surprised a woman who was traveling in France."
"Oh!" Then Helen laughed gayly.
"And this is our drawing room. Once a month we have sociables, given byone of the seniors who has to arrange everything just as she would ifshe were in society. And the other girls are the guests."
It was a beautiful long room, with a bay window at the side which made avery pretty break in it. At both ends were double windows. The floor wasmatted, with rugs here and there. The furniture was simple and tasteful;two cabinets were filled with handsome china and bric-a-brac, and therewas one case of elegant books. The real reading and study books,histories, and so on, were in the reception room and the study room.
Then they walked out on the porch where a bevy of girls had congregated.
"I have been introducing Miss Grant to the house," Miss Aldred said inher soft, pleasant tone, "and now you girls may tell her what we do andhow we do it, and anything else that will not make her feel homesick."
Helen was sure she should never have one yearning for Hope Center.
"Oh, Miss Aldred, don't you think we might go down town this afternoonand introduce her to the town where she will have to find her socialnutriment for the next ten months?"
"Social, indeed," laughed Miss Mays.
"Well, what is it? Our intellectual nutriment is here, and though wesometimes study wood and wilds you cannot exactly describe it as naturalpabulum, and though we do a little shopping you can't designate it asfinancial forage. But we will not bother about exact definition untilnext week, so that we can go, Miss Aldred?" imploringly.
"I see no objection at present."
The stage had come up with some scholars, and Miss Aldred went toreceive them.
"I am really going to take Miss Grant in charge. First, let us have awalk about our own domain."
The front and one side were devoted to pleasure and beauty. Some lovelyold trees, a willow touching the ground with its long arms, two splendidNorway spruces, a great catalpa, maples, and one fine old elm. Twohammocks were swung in the shade, there were several rustic seats about,and a table that seemed to invite one to a picnic meal. At the back thedecline was a tangle of wildness until it reached the little stream.Various wood asters were beginning to bloom, golden-rod, balsams, andseveral fine, white blossoms. Yet, it was rather shady and they all hada delicate appearance.
"And there is a path. You can go down," exclaimed Helen, ratherwistfully.
"And get yourself torn by briers. We won't go down this morning, forthere are pleasanter ways, and you will have enough of it when you goout botanizing."
"It is so beautiful. And over there is another hill." Her eyes werealight with enthusiasm.
"And the end of the town lies down in the valley. Now around here is theuseful and a bit of orchard. The old branching apple tree gives usoceans of bloom in the spring, and we are allowed to despoil it as itseldom fruits. That's the useful--not exactly the garden of sweet herbs,but there are some in it. And here is the lovely grape arbor, if you arenot afraid some fierce caterpillar or savage green worm an inch or twolong may swing down upon you."
There was a long bench at one side, and the air was fragrant withripening grapes. They seated themselves, and Miss Mays extended acordial invitation to the merry group.
"Are we really allowed to?" asked someone, hesitatingly, a stranger tothe privileges.
"In reason, yes. It would be most unkind and ill-bred to strip the vinesand offer them for sale in the public market. I hope none of you havebeen seized with that intention. There are some more prisoners of hope,"as another stage stopped.
"Why prisoners? Do they not come of their own accord," asked Helen.
"Oh, Miss Grant, they generally come of their fathers' and mothers'accord the first time. Did you really sigh to come?"
"I wanted to, yes;" in an eager tone.
"Depraved taste."
Helen looked surprised. That everyone of any intelligence should notlong for an education amazed her. And these bright, pretty girls whomust have congenial surroundings seemed the very ones to appreciate it.
They were still jesting when the luncheon bell rang. One new table wasfilled and some vacant spaces in several others. It was beginning tolook like quite a family. But Helen had the feeling of being a guest ata hotel, just as she had been all the week. They dispersed to theirrooms, and Helen tried to read a little, but the words were mixed upwith French and music. She would like the music she knew. She listenedto the sound of the piano on the floor below, and her whole soulresponded to the melody. Had anyone ever been so blest before? It waslike a fairy story.
"Well," exclaimed Miss Mays an hour or so later, looking in at the door,"have you a mind ready for a walk, to see the town. For I doubt ifotherwise you can be introduced to it before next Saturday."
"Oh, yes," springing up with energy. "I begin to think strange placesare--" she cast about for a word--"fascinating."
"How many strange places have you seen?" laughingly.
"Not many. A week in New York and the pretty places and wondersthereabout."
"New York is a marvel by i
tself. And I've never been there," sighing. "Isuppose I may be classed as a Westerner. The western part of the State.I know several of those cities and Niagara Falls and the Canada side; wewere there two months ago. I _did_ manage to squeeze in, but the girlsdidn't want me a bit. Papa managed that," exultingly.
Helen had been studying Miss Mays' attire. Her gray frock and coat werejust the thing, and her gray felt hat trimmed with scarlet and a brightwing. So she put it on and was ready.
"You can learn a good deal by watching other people," Mrs. Van Dorn hadsaid. "And it is bad taste to make yourself conspicuous."
As they stepped out in the hall several others joined them. Mrs. Aldrednodded to them as they passed out.
"Did you see those two girls on the veranda? They look like twins andmight almost as well be. They are fifteen, birthdays only a week apart.Mothers are sisters, and the fathers cousins. Alice and Annie Otis. Theyboth have light hair, but one has darker eyes than the other. And theblue-eyed one is a little stouter. They are to room together."
"Roxy Mays, I don't see how you find out so much about everybody," saidone of the group.
"By using my eyes and ears. One of them told part of this to Miss Grace,and the mother of Annie explained the rest to Mrs. Aldred, but I don'tknow which Annie is. I'll guess it is the plump one with a dimple in herchin. They have never been away at school before. You can tell that bytheir half-frightened look."
"Did I look half frightened?" inquired Helen, mirthfully, glancingaround.
"I must say you did not. And we descended upon you so unceremoniously.It might be admissible to ask what you thought of us."
"That it was very kind of you to call on me. I should have felt muchmore strange if I had speculated all the evening and seen you first thismorning."
"Now you see the benefit of rushing in where angels fear to tread. Youwere placed in our neighborhood, and we have been neighborly."
"I thank you very much," Helen returned gravely.
Elm Avenue ran straight down in the town, down to the river, indeed. Butthe beauty of Westchester was its main street that intersected this andran parallel with the river about a quarter of a mile below the school,and was called Center Street. It had all that was of the most account inthe town, the Court House, a fine building, a public hall with officeson the lower floor, two very pretty churches with their parsonages,several stores, post-office, and bank, and at both ends handsomeresidences with well-kept grounds. Being the county town, at autumn andspring it displayed a rather busy aspect; the rest of the time was givenover to very delightful, refined social living. There had been somedoubts at first as to whether a girls' boarding-school would not disturbthe serene aspect, but it was not large enough, and kept very well inhand.
From Center Street, streets and avenues branched out both ways. Thesewere substantially built up with large grounds and handsome gardens onthe east side, stretching out finally to farms, and on the west runningdown to the river, that being broken by rifts and rather dangerousplaces, was hardly navigable for general business, though small sloopsventured up when the river was not too low. A mile further down was abed of clay and a brick-yard, and two or three factories with a sort ofhamlet. Three miles below were large iron-works. The railroad ran alongthe river, and left the town to its beauty and comparative quiet.
It was, in its surroundings, much handsomer than North Hope, and thestyle of homes betokened both wealth and culture, a town whose ways weresettled, a town of the better class who had not to consider the ordinarychances of making money. Several of the houses were shut up in thewinter, while their occupants went to the city for the season. Those whoremained at home entertained themselves with various amateur diversions.There was a fine musical club that gave two or three concerts throughthe winter; another that had a course of lectures, and the churches gavefairs and sociables. The four denominations were represented, but thePresbyterians were the largest, oldest and most influential.
The small river was spanned by a number of pretty rustic bridges, andemptied into the greater one that divided it from the neighboring State,whose wooded heights and rocky bluffs were most picturesque. There wereonly occasional houses, though down at the brick-yard a small settlementwas begun. And already the sun was throwing long shadows from thedensest woods, where firs, cedars, and hemlock were almost black againstthe beeches and hickories, even now turning yellow at the point of thelong leaves; chestnuts with the brown fringes of bloom that bore nofruit still hanging to them. Here and there a pile of rocks, gray andbrown and dotted with glistening gems, it would seem, there were pointsthat sparkled so. There a hollow that might be a dryad's cave, bunchesof sumac in autumnal gorgeousness, tangles of wild growth, blackberrywith its deep red leaves, cat-briar still green and glossy, and theconfusion of wild woodland growth.
"Oh, how beautiful it is!" Helen exclaimed involuntarily.
"Where are you viewing the universe?"
"Over beyond the river. Do you ever go there?"
"Oh, yes, we row across. The school owns a boat. It is supposed to begood exercise, but it does blister your hands. There is a bridge fartherup there, now you can see it."
The church spire had hidden it from view, but it was just a plain,partly-covered structure.
"We went over for our picnic. There are swamps of rhododendrons, andmountain laurel. That is beautiful even in the winter if you are fond ofsuch things. Never mind them to-day. There will be some rambles overthere presently. Let us look nearer home. What are you, religiously?"
Helen flushed. Was she really religious at all?
"I mean what denomination claims your family? We generally follow intheir footsteps."
"Presbyterian," with a hesitating sound in her voice.
"Then this will be your church. Mrs. Aldred is a member here, and MissGrace, but curiously enough Miss Gertrude leans toward Episcopacy, andshe plays some of the old masses in a way that almost sweeps you alongin her current. She is to be an artist. Last winter she was in New Yorktaking lessons, and she teaches painting, but we haven't a very artisticlot of girls I think. Mr. Danforth is the clergyman here. You will likehim I guess. My people are Methodists. That is my church 'way downbelow, but I often go there."
"Oh, let us get on to the stores," said one of the group. "Let mesee--there are five of us. I'll treat to-day, that will make us fiveweeks going round. Only on Saturdays, mind."
They passed the bank, a very modest building with law offices on thesecond floor. Then the Court House, which was quite imposing, and a rowof stores, larger and finer than those in Hope. An inviting ice-creamparlor with a rustic garden at the side, divided into vine-coveredbooths, claimed their attention, and they sauntered in, seatingthemselves nonchalantly.
Helen Grant's Schooldays Page 12
