Guy’s fingers dipped into my mouth and I couldn’t help but suck and flick my tongue against their tips. His eyes darkened further, his breath hissed over his teeth and he bit the soft lip I wanted to taste.
“I should leave,” he said.
My eyes slid shut so I could deny his words more easily and I pressed my mouth further over his fingers. His other hand ghosted over my chest before settling on my waist where he dug his fingers into my soft flesh and pulled me over his lap. I continued to suck his fingers, wanting the soft steel of his cock but contenting myself with this for the moment.
“What is it about you, Will?” Guy whispered, the pain and confusion in his voice stilling me. The slip of his fingers from my mouth left me bereft.
“Maybe it’s just fate,” I told him. My fingers nestled in his hair, it felt so soft and I wanted to rub my nose in it.
“Maybe it’s witchcraft.”
“Maybe you’re scared.”
A crooked smile graced his handsome face. “I’m terrified.”
“No more words,” I decided. When I claimed his lips he gave back with matching passion and I explored his mouth while his hands tightened on my hips. I flexed into his body. He groaned when I pulled his hair and opened more for me, thrusting his hardened cock against mine.
We rode each other hard, the kiss becoming more desperate by the moment. I wanted to taste more of him, I wanted to lick his skin, bury my nose in his balls, bite the inside of his thigh and taste the flesh. I wanted him to come down my throat and I wanted to make him take mine. I wanted more. I wanted him buried in my body and so desperate for the pleasure I could give, he never wanted to leave.
Guy broke our kiss first but didn’t pull away, his hot breath filling the space between us as we both panted. “Will, I need to please you.”
“I was just thinking the same thing about pleasing you.”
He shuddered. “That is not my way.”
“Perhaps we can find a new one?”
“I don’t want a new one.”
“I can’t hurt you. I really can’t hurt you like Robin can.” I stroked my fingers through his hair, a gentle caress and he calmed, managing to look me in the eyes.
“You can take charge though, Will.”
I frowned. “Sweetheart –”
He gasped and pulled back.
“Did I do something wrong?”
His fingers flexed on my thighs and his storm grey gaze dropped. “No one has ever spoken to me the way you do.”
Of their own volition, my fingers ran through his soft hair once again. “You are though, you are my sweetheart. I don’t have very much experience, Guy. Robin is my first real lover. I don’t know how to do what you are asking from me.”
“There’s only ever been Robin and me?” he asked.
I blanched, I really didn’t want to share my past during this fate filled night. “Kind of, but now isn’t the time for that conversation.”
He studied me again with fresh eyes. “Is the man who hurt you dead?”
I opened my mouth to ask how he knew but Guy seemed to read things in me even Robin missed. “Yes.”
“Good.”
He dragged my mouth down to his once again and we kissed for a long time, slow and lazy, our hands roaming under clothing. An idea began to form in my devious and somewhat deviant mind but to carry it off I needed desperation and confidence.
I tugged his hair to remove his mouth from mine. “I want to sit where you are,” I said. “Lift me.”
Guy’s eyes widened and a smile drifted over his face. He tucked his hands under my legs and stood, pushing his cock against mine.
“Damn you feel so good,” I whispered.
With such care I felt like a prince, he lowered me to the hard settle and himself to the ground, bending his knee for me. He looked disturbingly beautiful at my feet. “Good, sweetheart. That’s good.” I stroked his cheek and he pressed into my palm, like a needy cat.
I took the opportunity and grabbed his jaw. His eyes snapped to mine. I held hard. “Now you can suck me.”
“Yes, please,” he murmured.
“Take me out, lick me first, then take me deep, deeper than you can manage – just for a moment mind – then enjoy yourself.”
“Can I touch myself?” he asked me, the breathless joy in his moon mist eyes made me want to weep for him. I held firm to my intention though.
“Not until I tell you.”
He whimpered but nodded. When he didn’t move I felt a moment of complete self-doubt until I realised I hadn’t given him permission. “You may give me pleasure, sweetheart,” I said.
His eyes slid closed. He sighed and widened his knees so he’d be at the right height. His hands trembled as he reached for me and the feelings that generated inside my heart made me dizzy with need. Why did this incredible, powerful warrior make himself vulnerable to me? Was he so alone in this world that giving himself to me was his only option to know desire?
Those long slim fingers reached into my clothing and he pulled my cock out, pushing the fabric down so he could free my aching balls. I leaked over his fingers and he lifted the sticky fluid to his mouth, licking long and slow, not for my pleasure but for his and that small whimper escaped him once more. It was fast becoming my favourite sound.
He bent his head, looked up at me and began his long, slow lick from the base of my cock. I shuddered and bucked just a little, bumping his nose, making him grin around his tongue.
“Fuck, that’s too good,” I murmured a moment too soon because he shifted and plunged down my cock with his lips wrapped tight around me. “Oh – shit.” My fingers gripped his shoulders as I bent over him. In one move he’d taken me all and I could feel his nose and his short breaths in my groin.
When he gulped I realised I’d stopped him from rising off my cock.
“Oh, shit,” I said again and sat up.
Guy slid upwards, tears in his eyes. “Sorry,” he gasped. “It’s been a long time.”
“I hurt you.”
He gazed at me. “Never, Will. You could never hurt me.”
I felt it then, in my gut, in my heart. We weren’t having sex, Guy wanted to worship me because he – fuck – he loved me. Whatever he saw in my eyes made him smile again, but this time a little sad twist to his lips, right before he swallowed my angry red and selfish cock down again.
Every swipe of his tongue, every suck of his mouth, every slide and glide of his soft lips and especially the nips he gave, drove me higher. When I wasn’t moaning he worked harder to bring me to audible pleasure again. I wrapped my legs around his shoulders and fucked up into his mouth.
When he paused for a moment he begged, “Will, I need to touch myself.”
“Yes, yes, make us come together. I want to taste you.”
I was out of my mind with need.
He took me deep, groaned, swallowed and slipped a finger over and into my hole. I came hard, a soft cry the only warning I could give. Guy brought his lips to the top of my cock, the white fluid spilling onto his lips as he worked to tip himself over the edge. I had enough presence of mind to lean down and lick his lips. It worked. He came the instant I touched him. I reached for his hand, brought it up, made sure I had eye contact and licked his fingers. He panted, his mouth a bruised mess, but when I licked inside his parted lips, he folded into me and took control of the kiss, dragging me onto his lap.
“I love you,” he whispered when he came up for air.
For several heartbeats we just stared at each other, Guy’s skin flushed, his eyes wide, pupils dilated, strong arms wrapped around my back.
I opened my mouth to reply but the words turned into a grunt because Guy pushed me off his lap, dumping me onto the smooth wooden boards and rose in one disorganised movement. He couldn’t escape me fast enough.
“Tell Robin I’ll help where I can but I will not sacrifice my honour to do it.” His words were short, spiked with anger and resentment and he’d turned his back to me.
> “Guy –” I tried to say, to stop him, to pull us back. Confusion rocked with shock inside me making me slow to think and slower to act.
“Don’t. Forget it. Goodbye.” He surged towards the front door of the inn.
If I allowed this to happen, if he left, there would be no return to those long slim fingers wrapping me up and making the world go away. “I love you as well,” I said in a rush of sound. I’d organised my legs and arms, I stood in the middle of the taproom and I would not be stopped.
The darkened room made it hard to see him, shadows clung to his bowed shoulders, his stiff back and his hands flexing into fists with a repetitive anxiety which pulled at my heart. I approached, placed a gentle hand on the wild cat’s back and felt him shudder.
“Please, look at me, sweetheart,” I whispered.
A shudder ran through him. “You can’t mean it.” He didn’t turn.
“I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it.”
“What about Robin?” Guy murmured into the darkness which now wrapped us both up in its cool embrace.
“What about Robin? He hasn’t mentioned love. He cares for me, he cares just as much for you, I’m sure about that –”
“What he feels for me looks like guilt,” Guy snapped.
In many ways I agreed with him. It looked like guilt to me as well but something else lurked in the background, something we could build on with a little work and patience.
“I think the same, if I’m honest. I don’t know if he can care about me the way he did Ghaalib. It doesn’t matter though, Guy. What matters now is you and I because…” Because I often found myself wondering how much Robin really cared about me and I wanted to be loved. It always felt like he could and would leave at a moment’s notice for some great task if it beckoned him away. If I could have that with Guy and Robin it would be perfect, intense, but perfect. If I couldn’t? If I had to choose? I took a deep breath and tried to find the words to help Guy understand. “We have something special, Guy. Something tender, something I don’t want to lose until I must. I don’t want to waste or surrender our time together.” I stroked his arm.
Guy turned towards me at last, his hand grasped my neck, feather light, and his thumb rubbed over my Adam’s apple. I lifted my chin in a sign of supplication and longing.
“Be mine,” he whispered.
I gazed into his eyes, the grey a maelstrom of passion, longing, fear and need. A need to be loved and understood. A need for demonstrative patience and understanding. I had no idea if I could prove worthy of such need but I wanted to try, for both our sakes. Guy gave me something, an ethereal sense of something right now, that Robin couldn’t or wouldn’t.
My hands flexed on his hips. “Yours and Robin’s, at least for the moment until we can figure everything out.”
“Agreed. I will belong to you, Will Scarlett, but not Robin, not again.” These words he used, the terms of this verbal contract between us were important, I could see it in his face. His entire focus assessed my understanding of his will.
“Agreed,” I said, the vipers of fear and the butterflies of hope warred for dominance.
Guy drew me into his body by my throat and nipped at my lips before pressing against them and seeking entry to my mouth with his hungry tongue. I groaned, more than ready for round two. When he let me up for air a wash of light-headed lust made me sway.
“I have to leave,” he said. “If I’m not in my rooms come morning there will be trouble.”
“Stay safe.” Sadness collided with happiness and slid into anticipation for the future.
“You too, minstrel. Tell Robin I’ll do all I can.” Guy took one more, brief kiss from my willing lips before releasing me and leaving the tavern.
31
THE WALK BACK TO Sherwood in the fresh snow filled me with excitement. I missed Guy’s heat and the strange accent modulating and softening his words, but I couldn’t wait to tell Robin that the ally we needed now lived in Nottingham’s castle.
By the time I made it over the ridge and onto the plateau the winter sun coloured the sky pink and the shadows were long.
“Will, you’re back,” cried out Much. He rushed over to me and the rapidly growing arms wrapped around me.
I chuckled. “You’ll be taller than me when you’re grown.”
He smiled and took my hand in his, leading me towards the cave. “Robin’s this way. He told me to keep my eyes open for you.”
Much tugged hard on my arm. The strength in his young body was surprising, but the boy’s simple mind made him vulnerable. “Hold fast, Much. I’ve walked leagues today I’m tired.”
“Marion’s made new clothes from the cloth we’ve stolen,” he said, all excitement and bouncing joy.
“Not stolen, Much, redistributed.”
Much laughed. “I can’t say that. Stolen is good enough.”
Which seemed a fair clarification to me. We strolled through the palisade and I realised they’d moved all the snow away from our living area so it didn’t melt and make yet more mud. Much hollered my arrival and Robin came out of the cave, wearing a new tunic in dark blue. He’d washed and brushed his hair, trimmed his beard into a fashionable style and wore those long black leather boots over dark leggings.
His reddish blond hair caught the sun and I stood, struck dumb by his rugged beauty. Apparently he twigged as to what I was thinking because he chuckled. “Welcome home, Will.” He drew me into his arms and, taking care not to crush my lyre, he kissed me deep and hard. I whimpered and clung to him, rubbing my groin against his like a horny dog.
“Did you see him?” Robin asked, the rumble of his deep voice warming me.
“I did and yes, he’ll help, to the limits of his honour though and…” I wasn’t sure how the next bit would go so I hesitated.
“Tell me,” Robin said, his eyes full of understanding.
“Protect me,” I whispered, unable to look in his eyes.
“You were with him?” The emphasis on the words made his meaning clear.
I flattened my hands on the broad chest. “Don’t be angry.”
Fingers laced through my hair and clasped the back of my skull. “Look at me, Will,” he ordered and I flicked my eyes upwards. “I cannot be angry with you for wanting what I would have taken in your place.”
A tight knot of anxiety in my chest loosened and I tucked my head under Robin’s chin while he held me close. “Maybe you can tell me later, or better yet, show me, what happened between you.”
“He swore himself to me,” I confessed.
I felt Robin nod against the top of my head. “I thought he might, he cannot give himself to me again.”
“Though he still cares, Robin. I think the two of you just need time and compassion.”
Robin rubbed my back. “We’ll see what the future holds when it becomes the present.”
Not exactly the reassurance I wanted but it would have to do for the moment. He took my hand and we entered the cave together. Tuck and Marion were sat working on new garments. Tuck looked up at me and smiled and I realised for the first time I saw him smile a great deal these days, he’d put on a little weight at last and stood taller. Love suited my little brother and its earthly manifestation, rather than the heavenly version, kept him in the real world and safe from the vagrancies of his mind.
“Did it work?” Marion asked. Convincing her of Guy’s genuine desire to help us without revealing his emotional commitment to Robin and myself had been tricky but we’d managed it without making her angry.
I grinned. “It did. Guy of Gisborne is a man of Sherwood after all.”
She snorted. “Man of Sherwood indeed. Where would you all be without us women, Will Scarlett?”
I swept her a bow. “Without our women we would have nothing to fight for, my lady.”
Eva and Alviva laughed. “Yeah, you fight for us? I think you fight for Robin,” Eva said, her golden eyes bright in the fire’s warmth.
During the evening the others came in from the f
orest where they had been hunting and foraging. I told them all what the city had been like as I’d wandered the streets before regaling them with stories only a minstrel could tell.
That night I lay in Robin’s arms and we made love, or at least I hoped that’s what he felt as he worshipped my body and I reflected back his passion. The feel of him over me, surrounding me, inside me, left me desperate to speak the words I’d held in my heart for weeks. Doubt though ruled me and I knew if I spoke before Robin of such emotion he would withdraw in a desire to protect us both from the pain of love. The terrible truth of this burned deep when I found it so easy to speak the words to Guy.
When I lay at peace in his arms, snug against his chest and listening to his deep breaths I tried to unravel why he could not tell me of his love but Guy could admit to it with far more freedom.
Robin held something in reserve because of past loss and the terrible pain it caused him, this act of self-protection kept me at a distance he could manage but when I gave my body to him there was nowhere he could hide his love. Guy wanted to be safe, understood, protecting and given permission to protect. He wanted so much more than just sex, he wanted to belong, to feel safe and he desperately needed to be loved. His insecurities as a man were something I loved about him, even as his prowess as a warrior and knight made me admire him. The darkness in both of them drew me to want to understand their needs and fill the holes life had punched in their souls. I wanted nothing more than to give both men a place to rest and feel peace. I wanted to provide them with a hearth and home where they could love in safety – love me and each other.
When I slept the memory of Guy’s heat haunted me even as I craved more of Robin’s.
WITH CHRISTMAS BEHIND US and Candlemas in front of us, Robin decided to put his plan into action before Epiphany, so we had little time to lose. The year would twist away from us once the thaw set in for spring and Marc could call in reinforcements from the king. The days slipped past and I missed Guy but we were all busy with tasks for the grand return of Robert Loxley, Earl of Huntingdon. Marion took great care of the dress she would wear and we made certain to include knives secreted about her person so she would be able to defend herself if necessary and arm us if we needed the help. I made a wooden mock-up of the castle’s interior as described by Alan and its grounds so we could work out escape plans. I also made a rough version of the city. It meant those who didn’t travel that far from the forest would be able to gain their bearings more quickly and we could practice more escape routes in our heads if not in real life.
Men of Sherwood (A Rogue's Tale Book 1) Page 26
